11-18-2010, 06:36 PM
Geneva listened to his answer, and although she wanted his honest opinion, her heart sank for a second. And then he added those last few words and his statement made complete sense. Jefferson did not feel that he deserved happiness of any sort. Whatever had happened to him before the days he had assumed the name Jefferson, he still felt like a sinner. She did not know even to this day if he felt repentant, of if he was still plagued with the blind sense of guilt. However, from where she stood, the only creature capable of lifting that great guilt was Jefferson; he held the key, and she hoped that one day he would allow himself to be free of it.
"I might change things," Geneva said honestly. "Small things, big things, more things than I care to enumerate." It made her slightly miserable to ponder such things, but Jefferson deserved an honest reply. She had asked him hoping for the same honesty. "But that has very little to do with you, and much more to do with my own actions." Geneva was no stranger to guilt. It had preyed on her in the same way he preyed upon him, in a sense. In relation to their falling out, she felt that she was entirely responsible.
"I am just glad that we found our way back to each other," she said. It had taken much time for them to return to each other. Although she was still recovering most of her self image, she felt less like she had to be completely self reliant. She was finding ways to bend and not break. She was finding ways to adapt to their new life, and she wanted to share it with him as much as possible.
"I might change things," Geneva said honestly. "Small things, big things, more things than I care to enumerate." It made her slightly miserable to ponder such things, but Jefferson deserved an honest reply. She had asked him hoping for the same honesty. "But that has very little to do with you, and much more to do with my own actions." Geneva was no stranger to guilt. It had preyed on her in the same way he preyed upon him, in a sense. In relation to their falling out, she felt that she was entirely responsible.
"I am just glad that we found our way back to each other," she said. It had taken much time for them to return to each other. Although she was still recovering most of her self image, she felt less like she had to be completely self reliant. She was finding ways to bend and not break. She was finding ways to adapt to their new life, and she wanted to share it with him as much as possible.