suffering beneath me

Talitha de le Poer · 04-27-2011, 08:23 PM

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She was surprised to hear Aeron's questions. God. Who was God, what was God. Shining eyes of burgundy widened ever so slightly as she looked upon the woman near her. She had never been a priest, or a preacher or even knowledgeable in the ways of the world. All she knew was her own faith, but that was all she needed. Somehow, she would try to enlighten those around her upon that faint and phantom information. Aeron could be the first. "God created everything, or so I've been lead to believe. He watches over us, and tries to keep us from the temptations given by the Devil." The foundation of her life had been set in those facts that had never been proven. "Ezekiel tells me that God is the one who makes the paths we take in our life. I don't know if I believe him; if God loved me, I don't see why He would want me to be unhappy." She had wondered that for so long, but the conclusion she came across was unsatisfactory — was He testing her? It was possible.

Talitha allowed the subject of God to fade into the background, searching the inlet for something else entirely as Aeron commented on her mood. Did she really seem so sad? All the time? Yes, she supposed she did. "I think I suffer for the wrong reasons. Selfishly. Of my own doing." The bad was her fault. She ruined so much, and for what? Her belief that she had destroyed what life Ezekiel could have had without her had come to ruin his little sister, and it was so utterly false. The prime example of Talitha ruining her own experience in life. "It's sadness never the less, but it's unnecessary."

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