Yay! I has a shiny room to live in... also I am loving playing Robin, it's fun to have a young over-adventurous pup to play with 
WC: 1671?! Oh dear I rambled... do I get 15 points for this?
The ebony furred fae listened to what Savina said. She adored her leader then, her words made so much sense, brought the green eyed lady more comfort that she probably realised, it was true that she would still bear the burden of guilt for the rest of her life, after all that had happened there was no way that she could not, she had killed in her past, she had spawned a rapist and a rather unhinged daughter, she had abandonded her family, leaving them unknowingly to such strong hardships, she could not believe that she had done such an awful thing. It would be something she would just have to learn to live with it, to eventually put it into her past. But she knew now that it could not be changed, she could not help what had happened, there was nothing she could do, no way to go back in time and change it, there was no chance of her being able to go into the past and prevent the terrible things from occuring, if she did so then she would bring Rokus back, allow her small son to have a chance at life, she would have stayed around, keeping Conri in check, making sure he would not commit the awful crimes that he had, she would have raised Khaden and Dhalia properly, not allowing them to be poisoned by the infected mind of their psychotic half brother. Bile rose in her throat as she thought of him, he was the worst creature she could imagine, she hated him, and this was a fae who found it very difficult to hate, it was not in her nature to do so, she tried to see the best in all she saw, she was very forgiving, but that... that evil male had taken her red son's arm, tried to convert her black son into a little minion in his deranged Hollow worshipping cult, and having almost succeeded with Dhalia, she was unsure what he had poisoned their minds with, she was just certain that Khaden had had more sense than to follow it, seeing it only as the ramblings of a rabid fool. He had tried to tell them that Hollow loved them beyond all, that he had given his life for them, the lies he told with such conviction had entraced Dhalia, she refused to believe that Hollow had not even known of their existance, he had raped their mother, beaten her, murdered her mate and inpregnanted her, and that was the limit of his involvement in their lives, that was all he had done. She claimed that he had loved her more than life itself, Soran had been completely unable to stop herself laughing in her red daughter's face, he did not even know what love was, he was incapable of it, besides how could he love someone he did not even know existed? If she had been here then perhaps none of this would have happened, she would have her family, her children, grandchildren and great grandchildren all together in one place. But as Savina had said, it was beyond her control, perhaps it would get easier to live with the guilt, one day at a time.
"Thank you for that Savina, it gives me a lot of comfort, your words were very kind." Soran replied.
Then Savina spoke of her pups and Soran smiled, her long dark tail wagging lightly as she listened to her speak. Her older litter were over two years old now, they must have been born not long after Soran left, she wondered how on earth she had managed to miss such an important thing happening to her ebony mirror image. She continued to listen as she spoke, saying how she may one day like more children, but that for now she was focusing on the pack, the ebony fae nodded in agreement, yes the pack had always been like a large family, that was one of the reasons that she had loved it here, she had always felt like she was coming home to family when she stepped over the borders, even though many of the pack were now strangers, she would see them as her extended family, and would protect, advise and help them as such. After all if they did not all treat one another as family, how could they possibly hope to survive? They needed to work together, to be a team if they wanted to survive in these unusual circumstances.
"Oh how lovely, it must be nice to have them all running around together. I have four pups now, three girls and a boy, Rain, Florence and Flavian, they're twins, and the youngest's name is Kiwi. They're still living where I have been while I have been away, I suggested that they came with me here, but they did not want to, I cannot blame them, that pack is their home, where they were born and grew up. We parted on good terms, they have promised to at least come and visit, I hope when they come here that they see what I do in these lands and want to stay though, it would be wonderful to have them here. I cannot believe they are of the age they are now, it seems that I blinked and suddenly they were no longer tiny pups,"The fae paused momentarily to let out a little chuckle."I was not planning on having anymore, I had quite enough with my three, but now I wouldn't change them for the world, I am sure that if you do end up with another litter that you will feel exactly the same. They're wonderful, children." The fae replied, pausing for a moment, a small sigh escaping her lips, her children were one of her favourite subjects of conversation, she could talk about them for an age, her green eyed brood, (with the exception of Rain) but talking of them made her miss them, they were such a massively important part of her life, she had managed to be a good mother to them, she wanted them to be with her soon, she wanted to see their lives unfold before them, for them to see new challenges and meet them head on. She missed them.
She could not help but chuckle at Savina's reply to her comment about the house, she had been quite the same when she had arrived here, having never been near a human abode and then suddenly being invited to sleep in the Syemv house, now she could not help but miss the luxury of it, being warm and sure that she was safe at all times. Then the fae spoke about Mati, she seemed optomistic which made the fae hopeful again, Savina clearly knew her reddish brown granddaughter better than she, and she seemed to think that the pair of them would soon enough gain some kind of relationship, even if it was not mimicking a familial relationship yet, hopefully soon it would blossom into that. The ebony woman wondered if Savina knew how much she was affecting her, that she had given her two little injections of hope in such a short space of time, no wonder she was such a good leader, she inspired confidence and gave those without much hope the courage to believe that things would get better. The green eyed lady wondered if she knew what a big help she was being to her heart, that she was putting structures in place that might help it to heal, just through talking. She nodded as the fae spoke, it was true that Conri and Nani had both done terrible things, she could tell that it was hard for her dark counterpart to speak of the pair of them, there was much bad blood there now, there had to be, Soran did not blame her."I understand why she is upset Savina, I know that they have done awful, unforgivable things, I just hope that she can see in time that I am not like them, that I want to be there for her in a way that they never were, I'd like to be someone stable in her family." She said, smiling at the dark fae. The truth was that she had indeed been just like them, she had killed in the past, admittedly they had been in self defence, aside form Rokus, and the truth was that he would have died moments later, she needed to remove that guilt from herself, she had done a kindness in reality, ended his life before he began to suffer, even if it was for her own selfish reasons. She had to stop blaming herself, he would not have recovered, already showing the signs that Maeve had just moments before she had died, through her actions her son's passing had been quick and painless, but she had not done it for that reason, she needed to start forgiving herself for it though. He would have died anyway. She had also been a drug addict and an emotional wreck, unable to cope with existance, but that too was in her past, she was nothing like that again.
The female nodded slowly as Savina spoke of having not seen Khaden and Dhalia. "I see, that's not surprising to me, they are wanderers. As far as having never met Dhalia that might be for the best, she's a little too like her father, I am not sure how stable she is mentally if I am honest. I don't think she's dangerous, she's just... well a little unhinged." The fae replied, pulling a face that showed that she wasd not keen on Dhalia's world views and that she hoped more than anything that she had changed her mind, seen sense.
"Is there anything else I need to know, had anything else important changed? Is Anu still here?" Soran asked, hoping that nothing else had changed much, this was a lot to take in in one day.
