08-23-2011, 10:48 PM
If Shawchert felt bad just then it wasn't what he was feeling when he saw Orins face, her comments about his kids. What had happened to his brains, why the hell did he do that? Those questions were non stop, but his biggest one to himself of all was.... what was he going to do about it. Sitting and moping wasn't going to help, but he was still trying to think, and with Orin raging at him, it didn't make things better... oh how he wished he could take things he said back, what had he been thinking? He'd been so cautious since his mother, but it just wasn't good enough. He grabbed the fur on his head and pulled a little, entirely unsure of what to do. It seemed to hurt him more to see Orin speak of their children and their pack than it hurt losing Sky, but it should have. They were his life more than Sky had been and now he had endangered every single one of them.
I DON'T KNOW, I just.... I will make things right again.. I just..... HAVE to plan. Take a course of action, Protect the pack... I shouldn't have gone, I"m sorry, I should have gotten permission. I was acting like a puppy.... what's done is done, and now I just have to .... FIX it somehow. Okay? I'm not here wallowing in self pity, I do not feel sorry for my punishments, i deserve everything I got plus some.
He breathed, trying to focus, angry at himself, for all the hurt he was causing the woman who was standing in front of him. He was looking at her with eyes pleading her to finish what she needed to do. He had business to take care of he had to set up defenses if any. He learned his lessons and well, or tried to, but what was he suppose to do. How was he suppose to answer her question? Watching her, his eyes caught the strings of her hair moving as she was animatedly miffed, something formed in his head, but he kept his mind on the matter at hand. How could he calm her down?
"I never wanted anything to happen to us, to our children. I don't know what you want me to say, but.... words have never helped me before. I doubt they will help me now.
He was now mentally forcing his emotions down, trying to stay calm. The Shawchert before would ahve freaked out, did something stupid and made things worse. He was not that man, he wanted peace, and he wanted happiness most of all. The few things he hadn't gotten since he came back except for when he was with his daughters.
I DON'T KNOW, I just.... I will make things right again.. I just..... HAVE to plan. Take a course of action, Protect the pack... I shouldn't have gone, I"m sorry, I should have gotten permission. I was acting like a puppy.... what's done is done, and now I just have to .... FIX it somehow. Okay? I'm not here wallowing in self pity, I do not feel sorry for my punishments, i deserve everything I got plus some.
He breathed, trying to focus, angry at himself, for all the hurt he was causing the woman who was standing in front of him. He was looking at her with eyes pleading her to finish what she needed to do. He had business to take care of he had to set up defenses if any. He learned his lessons and well, or tried to, but what was he suppose to do. How was he suppose to answer her question? Watching her, his eyes caught the strings of her hair moving as she was animatedly miffed, something formed in his head, but he kept his mind on the matter at hand. How could he calm her down?
"I never wanted anything to happen to us, to our children. I don't know what you want me to say, but.... words have never helped me before. I doubt they will help me now.
He was now mentally forcing his emotions down, trying to stay calm. The Shawchert before would ahve freaked out, did something stupid and made things worse. He was not that man, he wanted peace, and he wanted happiness most of all. The few things he hadn't gotten since he came back except for when he was with his daughters.