Her lone suffering was short-lived as she had hoped. Though eternity trickled by within her mind, the outside was only witness to a few hours since the parting of child and surrogate. He was always there, her ompre, and in her broken heart she had hoped he would be here with her now if not to console, then to let her know that someone would not fault her, even if this was her own mistake.
He must have seen this coming when her own mind refused to acknowledge it. His reservations had often made her uneasy when she had the pup even if he was not unkind to her. The distance was apparent and to her better judgment, she did not address it knowing in the back of her mind what it pertained to. She did not want to hear it then… but perhaps it was best that she heard it now.
He called for her softly lingering just at the entrance of her den before carefully crawling inside, now allotted more space since her work to expand it. She recalled the giggling bouts the little one had as she watched the woman dig away at the walls of the den to provide more room for the child and herself to play, and for her and her ompre to share their nights in relative comfort when given the time. Little Sarian had filled the den with her laughter and energy bringing light to the otherwise dull space. The furs along the floor still held her scent, especially the hide they slept on in the corner. She could not look to anything within this home and not see or smell the child. Even the strips of hide strung across the ground surfaced a joyous memory shared with the little one. And she feared it would only be that from now on; a memory.
She slipped into her lover’s comforting arms, holding dearly to him seeking whatever comfort he had to offer. She would take anything if it meant easing this pain only a little. “I… I had to give her back,” she whispered as if the child’s absence and her distraught form was not enough to tell. “I don’t think Shiloh will ever let me have her… or see her again. I thought I could keep her. She made me so happy…”