taste the night

Saul Stormbringer · 05-03-2012, 04:17 PM

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-chews-

Saul Chibi is by Requiem!

The soft lull of their voices, calming and gentile in the hush of the hut, was a soothing balm to his frayed nerves. She didn't know what he'd come after her, when she'd left for a few days. She didn't realise the utter panic as he'd left the camp, following her trail instinctively and without thought. Her body remained relaxed, although he could almost feel the annoyance around them as he asked her why she ran away. He supposed he could have phrased it better- he had meant why had she hidden from him, avoided him, taken a trip away and not told anyone. Her voice turned petulant, a blatant denial and raised just slightly so that he would understand she meant it. He snorted, a soft rustle of air through his nose. He wasn't laughing at her, but the release of breath through his nose was his way of letting it go. They would not get anywhere tonight if he pursued this argument- not to mention that he didn't want to break the careful serenity surrounding them in that second. He didn't want her to leave him again, didn't want to feel the oppressive weight of something missing, when she was right across the fire from him.

Still, he should have known better than to answer her with something sentimental. Lilin had a logical mind, which would usually only be sated by logical explanations and Saul throwing his feelings at her wasn't going to cut it. Curled around her, it was easy to feel the stress and tension in her little body as he voice rose once more, reasoning perfect. He winced once more, his stomach clenching in fear and anxiety when her troubles hit home. He might not have been able to figure out what was going on with them, or what was going on in his own mind, but he knew that the reason he stayed awake at night worrying. Her thoughts were in tune with his own, even if he hadn't fully realised it. And he knew that he didn't have an answer for her- he had no way to tell her that it would be okay, and that they shouldn't think about others, it was themselves they should think about. He didn't know how to tell her any of this, he didn't know what to say.

When Teme asks questions, I will tell him the truth.

He stated simply instead, his voice still hushed and soft. Her worries were real, tangible things that he had no idea how to overcome, and that set his teeth on edge, his stomach churning painfully in fear and tears to sting his eyes. He felt her wince against him as he spoke of his feelings. Pain lanced through his body at her accusation, hurting but alighting an anger in him that was rarely seen. Without warning, he shifted, moving his body away from hers and therefore allowing her body to lay flat. He moved swiftly, shifting his body over hers, supporting his weight on his hands either side of her head, his knees resting on the outside of her thighs. How can you say that? What I feel for you has... no words. No words Lilin. I can't even describe to myself what you mean to me. He spoke forcefully, anger and fear lacing his words uncomfortably. Green eyes were burning, the anxiety and the desperation to make her see that she was wrong. As quickly as it had come, his anger dissipated and dropped his head softly. I followed you, when you left. I came to find you, but I lost you. I panicked... He admitted, voice low and shaking with shame. Green eyes were fixed on her stomach, stretched out beneath him and he stayed there, head hung, shoulders bowed with the inability to make this right.

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