it should have stayed unreal

[Catalyst de Sadira]

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aus buchstaben heraus
Private for Slaying the Dreamer. Word Count: 371

im buchstaben

          For the first time since abandoned into Dahlia de Mai, Catalyst began to feel traces of longing and confusion slowly ebbing into greater emotions and need. Perhaps the rest of her siblings felt the same way (or maybe not), but it seemed to be, even at this young of an age so far, that Catalyst was slowly coming to her realizations. Although Catalyst was too young yet to fully comprehend the situation to where her mother simply dropped her in the care of another family member, the instinctual need for a mother's touch was sure enough to cause feelings of discomfort and distance (and it was definitely a recognizable thing, for the scent of mother was unique in its own, and the scent of Cercelee was entirely different, but somewhat of the same kind. It was hard to explain, but Catalyst knew, simply by instinct, that Cercelee and Anka were two completely different individuals, and that her real mother was not present). To snuggle against mother's fur again, to feel warmed and safe by her embrace and hold, to feel that connection that was only sacred to mother and offspring. All of that was simply non-existant to Catalyst, no matter how much Cercelee might have proved to be a guardian figure to her.

          Cercelee would have to prove herself over time, and Catalyst was surely warming up to her so far, for she had been nothing but gentle and considerate, and watched over the litter as if they were of her own bearing. Life honestly wasn't even that bad whatsoever, at least they had a sturdy roof over their head and Cercelee would come home to provide lavishing rabbit meals. Today Catalyst wandered from the safe confines of the church once again, this time bounding about in the orchard, temporarily taking her mind off that strange instinctual feeling of bonding. The flowers here bloomed in full season, their sweet smell filling the warm spring air. She was mesmerized by their colors and perfume, and was taking option to actually eat some, in which they didn't taste as pretty as they looked, nor how they smelled. "Pfft! Yuck!" She spat out some petals, regretting to even take a bite off of one.

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