306.
I got a scar where all my urges bled
“You killed Haku. Not any god or thing or fantasy. You did it,” she explained fiercely, wishing she could better convey her ideas. She wasn’t sure whether she wanted to anger him or just express her thoughts, so her wording was awkward and fragmented. Did she want to hurt him, or just prove him wrong? Could she? Did it even matter? Probably not. She shouldn’t try so hard to disprove something she couldn’t prove didn’t exist anyways; she just hated knowing that Gabriel, one she respected, had such beliefs. It wasn’t his killing or anger toward wolves that bothered her: it was his faith in something he did not know existed.
“You’re responsible for getting rid of that monster. Don’t try to pretend you’re not. You did a good thing. Attributing it to something else only lessens that.” After she said the last few words, she realized how controversial her words were. She realized how he might easily interpret that as a verbal attack against his beliefs – and maybe it was. Maybe she wanted to convert him. She just wished she knew why. Before, she suspected she would have been more tolerant – let him believe what he wished, as long as it did not hurt her. Let him live his life as he wanted. But now, she felt such anger within herself that she couldn’t let this slide by.
“But you didn’t avenge her. I still have that to do,” she concluded. She would fight and bring justice in the memory of her daughter to avenge her death. Even though Tayui had not been there to save her daughter’s innocence, she would try her best to ensure it did not happen to anyone else. There was far too much suffering in this world, and she did not need a god or faith to tell her that.
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