heard terabyes of perfect pitch.

Kaena Lykoi · 04-16-2011, 12:34 AM

No problem at all, my friend! Big Grin

It's what I'm here for, anyways -- thank you for being receptive to criticism and willing to work toward improvement. It's much appreciated! <333

If you haven't already checked it out, the RP Guide would probably be a great place for you to check out. It's really extensive and intended to be used as a reference material for you to check back in on while roleplaying, so definitely make use of it. ^^ The writing section is particularly awesome and helpful.

For the thread with Moonfyre -- I'm not sure if you knew, but Moonfyre's player currently plays Axelle Napier. You can send her a PM and ask after the ending of the thread, if you'd like to determine a concrete end. :3 Playing it as if they were separated definitely works, though -- it doesn't assume anything of her character or powerplay Moon in any way, and allows you to keep going with that general storyline here. Big Grin

You can strengthen the description and display of his emotions a fair bit -- for example, "Quickly, the male replied with deep feel of respect and fear towards the female" -- you can add in that maybe his ears were pinned back or his tail was tucked low, both signs of submission/fear in wolves. Or maybe describe the tone of voice he uses -- probably soft-spoken in this instance. Smile

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Word Count :: 317

She did not recognize this stranger. The hybrid had spent but a night in AniWaya what must have been a lifetime ago. The coyote herself could scarcely remember the instance. It had to have been before the fall, before Haku -- everything before that event seemed almost hazy in comparison, as if life had come to a sharp, brutal head that night. Indeed, in a way, it had -- the hybrid had avoided such abuses for nearly a decade between Kairo and Haku, and it seemed cruelly appropriate she would come full circle.

The wolf spoke, and she had guessed correctly -- he did not seem to be injured, and she could not imagine what she could help him with -- she had not been to Halifax and she would have avoided the area completely, given the opportunity. One return, guarded by three other canines, had been quite enough for Kaena. At his words, the hybrid's ears twisted forward, one whole and the other ragged and torn.

Her single eye regarded him for a moment cooly, her scar-laced expression revealing nothing. “Kaena Lykoi,” she said, relenting -- she hadn't sought him out to gawk at him, after all. “What can I do for you?” she asked, figuring she would be asked to direct him home, or perhaps lead him there. She eventually intended to seek out AniWaya anyway; it would be very nearly helpful for her to head there first, as it was most distant from her small encampment.

There was no nervousness in the hybrid as she awaited his response; from appearances alone, she did not think he posed a threat to her. Physically, he was likely a match for the old woman, but something in his forlorn gaze seemed kindly. Though neither Kaena nor Inferni considered AniWaya an ally, Dawali had shown her kindness, and spoken of a peaceful tribe -- she trusted his word.

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