This is the Death of Svara Thames
She stood on the highest cliff in Cour Des Miracles. The wind blew in her face making her take a deep breath. It was the perfect place. Right below the cliff the waves crashed against the rock and other rocks rested below. A soft smile rested on the womens face as she looked down at those rocks. So many thoughts raced through her head. Her heart raced and her hair twirled around her in vibrant dancing swirls. Even with her scars she was beautiful in this one moment.
The leather collar still hung around her neck, now her hand grasped it as she remembered why she had the thing in the first place. It sent a shiver down her spine to remember it. Nightmares were not in her dreams, but in her past. The past made her sick to her stomach, everything did now a days. It didn't matter anymore she was going to finish this today. Slipping her hand over the buckle of the leather mass she was careful to unhook it and slide it off her neck. Looking at the worn leather she smiled ever so slightly and rebuckled it. A large rock stood next to her on the grassy cliff. She set the collar on the rock and under it her note. Weather anyone found the note or not she wasn't sure, but that didn't matter she had left one her part had been played.
Svara turned around so her back was to the drop below, staring at Cour Des Miracles she could only feel a smile on her lips. This was what she had come home for. She could have died before easily accepting it letting go of all the pain. The red wolf hadn't wanted to leave so much unsaid, so much undone. In all she had come back and did the things she had always wanted to and to make sure she hadn't left anything broken.
Her lids slipped over her yellow eyes so she could relive the past.
Her paws were cold and she was starving. The hunger nipped at her belly not relenting until she could almost chew off her own foot. Svara was young, only a puppy of five months. She moved through the snow into wolf territory reluctantly looking for help. She found it in a gruff blue eyed male, and golden she wolf with a sharp tounge. The women growled at her argued with her, but the man was almost silent with minimal speaking. She had loved this man, but it had proved a pointless love.
That memory vanished and she was standing with Cwmfen when her eyes had first been damaged. The warrior made her feel safe and even warm. Her den was comfortable and safe as she lay in it. The women was someone to speak to who would listen, but speaking was so hard and she wished she could make it sound right. Wished she could make the women proud. It was strange how much she wanted to live up to her grandur but knew she just didn't have it in her.
That memory to slid away and it was replaced with her standing in front of Cercelee and Cwmfen as they demanded her to leave the lands. Her heart hurt in her breast and it was all she could do not to fall into a heap of tears. They warrior had taken away so much with such a crude action. The land behind them seem so distant between those two bodies, her home lost because the man she loved hated her. Even then she refused to think it was her who was broken, but the blue eyed man who's soul was a black void. Firefly was there, the golden she wolf her air in an oxgyen deprived room. Her eyes no longer felt wet as she stood there with her equal, and the closest thing to a mother and friend she'd ever had.
Her mind moved on quickly giving her Haku's attack on her body. The moments when he ravished her body and she let him do it. Then she had thought that was what love was, but now she knew different, someone had showed her that. The pain of him carving into her body let all the emotions slide through the cracks till all she felt was the blood leaking into the soil beneath her. No hate, no love, just utterly lost.
The pain leaked away to a moment when she lay next to the one armed king on the cliff. Constable of her pack she could feel no greater pride or happiness. Everyone said she was nothing here she was finally something, not a waste of this life. An instant love came to the man laying beside her, since he had given that to her. It wasn't the power it was the trust. She had seeked it and now found it so easily in a stranger. The warmth of his body seeped into hers and warmed even her cold heart.
Finally she was there on the day she had left Cour Des Miracles. Firefly had left her, with no word. The women had just vanished so cruely leaving the broken girl behind with a heart crumbling in her chest. Svara hadn't chanced after her, she was only going to leave for a day and come back. The males had grabbed her from behind. Harsh hands strangled her until she blacked out and the next thing she knew she was at their home, they raped her cut into her skin. The torture wasn't what broke her, but the complete hoplessness. It wasn't her pack mates that saved her from this hell, a black wolf did, one with a large leather collar.
Night, was the black wolfs name. He took her away helped her, saved her, and even gave her hope. Svara fell in love with him. How could she go back when she had him? Could she take him with her? He would grin at her when ever she gave him a sassy reply, even give one in return. He didn't judge her, he didn't ask about the past, he gave her hope and strength. Then, he died and with him her hope.
She opened her eyes. Tears ran down her red cheeks as she thought about him. It would have been so easy to give up, but she hadn't. Instead she'd come here to finish everything. Her yellow eyes looked at the setting sun. It was twilight her favorite time. The air was cool and it was beautiful out. She had come back and done everything she had wanted. Slept with the one armed king, made sure Leroy was okay, seen Firefly one last time, and breathed in the sea breeze of her beloved Cour Des Miracles. Now there was ony one last thing to do.
She was no longer crying, her back to that suttle sea breeze, the sound of the waves crashing down below against the rocks. The red wolf wished nothing but good upon this pack, but she had never had any intention to stay and where she was going she wouldn't need the collar. He would be there waiting for her and she knew it. The sun set slowly below the horizan and as it did she looked at her beloved Cour des Miracle. The land was so beautiful it took her breath away. This would always be her home, not Dahlia Des Mai, this was where she belonged.
The sun was set now leaving only a purple rays of light lingering in the sky. Smiling she let her arms out at her sides and put her feet at the edge of the cliff. She took one last look at her home her smile widening her heart held no fear. She was ready to go. Leaning her weight back she felt as if it was slow motion. Her body descended back the land slowly dissapearing from her sight and as it did she closed her eyes, the last thing she had seen was her Cour Des Miracle.
"I'm coming Night"
The area was silent as if she had never been, only the thick leather collar and note were left. They lay on the rock waiting to be found if they ever were. Svara thames had come home to die.
NOTE
To whoever finds this I'm glad it turned out this way. I don't think you'll ever understand, but it wasn't the pressure that drove me to this, it was the devotion. I'm not angry, I'm just saying goodbye is a second chance. I hope you'll forgive me Firefly, I've always loved you, you better come find me you bitch!
Leroy, I'm sorry I wasn't a good mate, but your better off. I was to damaged for you Kujo. I don't think I should have ever hurt you, but at least I made an impression on you.
Jacquez thank you for giving me a chance. I don't think I've gotten much better then that chance you gave me. I wish I could have done better for you. I just want you to know I never ranaway from my duty, I'm sorry you ever thought I had.
I love my pack, please forget me, don't shed fucking tears they are so useless. The collar is the only item I have to leave you with, well the only thing I can give you. It was my mates, please take care of it.
I'm sorry for nothing, Long live Cour Des Miracles!
Svara Thames