Un jour tout s'arrête
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WC: 889


The hurricane had stirred up many things in the Court, leaving the pack damaged and shaken up. The stables were by and large repaired, though there were always small things that needed to be fixed. The horses going missing, though, that had been the worst shock of all for Hati. Asagi had been found safe and sound, but almost losing her had been heart-wrenching. Compulsively, now, he would return to the stables at odd hours of the night, just to make sure she was still there. Tonight was no exception, the moonlight illuminating his familiar path from the Haskel-Catori household. The silver pendant that hung heavy and cold around his neck matched the moon in the sky. He did not venture out much during the day anymore, and only to the stables when he did. If he had any friends outside of Alder, they might have worried about him.

The herd did not even react to his presence anymore. They seemed quite accustomed to his random comings and goings. Hati moved straight to Asagi, relieved when he saw the outline of her chestnut body on the floor of the stall. She whickered a soft greeting as he let himself in, sinking to his knees amid the hay. He wrapped his arms around the horse's neck, hugging her tightly. To her credit, the peaceful mare did not seem to mind all the added attention, though her young master had never shown this sort of affection weeks ago. She lipped at his dark mane, tousling his fur with her velvety nose. Hati leaned against her, needy for the warmth of another being.

The horse was his only living link to his mother, since speaking to his relatives was too painful. Skoll had always been his closest sibling, from the time when they were infants and Hati wanted to emulate him, all the way to the grief-stricken embrace they shared the day they lost Ayita. Hati wanted to spend time with his golden brother and work through this burden together, but did not know how to ask. It would hurt them both to see each other, simply because they would be reminded of their tragedy. The dull ache in his chest would not go away, and so he spoke aloud to the darkness, addressing his horse in French.

"Maman, tu me manques ... il est si seul ici sans toi à qui parler. La maison est vide. Skoll n'est pas rentré depuis la tempête ... Je pense qu'il se déplace de façon permanente. Je me demande si je devrais aussi. Père... n'est pas l'homme que tu savais..." He swallowed the lump in his throat, his voice barely above a whisper. These thoughts were too private to delve into with anyone else, but in the safety of the stables, under the blanket of night... the horses could share his secrets. Asagi's dark eyes gleamed at him through the shadows, staring at the Squire as though she did truly comprehend him. In the weeks that followed Ayita's death, he was beginning to see Asagi not just as his mother's parting gift, but as a surrogate parent herself. It was pathetic, and he dared not tell anyone, not even Alder... But he could pretend that his mother's spirit had been reborn inside the mare. He clung to her more tightly, the rhythmic thudding of her heartbeat bringing him comfort.

He remained on the stall floor for some time, breathing in the horse scents of hay and hide, listening to the noisy way she exhaled near his ear. It was calming, though this remedy would not last him long. The gloom would close in again, and he would have to run back here to dispel it. "Je t'aime, Maman," he murmured obediently, giving her a goodnight kiss on the nose before he slowly extricated his arms from the horse and rose stiffly to his feet. Asagi tucked her long head against her side, ready to go back to sleep after the interruption. After lingering for a moment longer, Hati left the stall, closing it carefully behind him and triple-checking the latch. He would never get to sleep if he thought she could get loose again.

The night air was crisp, colder than it had been before the mighty storm. The hurricane had ushered them into autumn, stripping trees of their leaves and limbs as well as battering the time-honored structures of Lunenburg and the Chien Hotel. Hati's eyes wandered dully as he walked home, feeling numb. It was only a flicker of white that caught his attention. He turned, staring sadly at the distant hills washed pale in the moonlight. There was a group of wild horses meandering there, far off in the distance. Usually horses grazed during the day, but this small herd must have learned some other trick to survival. One of the horses reared on its hind legs, braying a proud whinny that carried over the rolling landscape. Hati smiled thinly, recognizing the wild horse with the long gossamer-white mane and tail. He had spotted it the first time he ever crossed the border of this pack, and now this was a second sighting. It was free, and Hati had the overwhelming feeling that he, on the other hand, was not. Without another thought he turned away from them and continued home.

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