duty without pain
#1
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As he always did, Larkspur hunted as a wolf. He had observed others use their two legged form, armed with pointy sticks and bows and all sorts of contraptions, but found this to be tiresome. His hands were stupid and could not craft fine weapons, just as they could not wield them. He was suited to hard work instead—between the horse, the house, and the boy, his hands were full. Though his ward was kin, the name and peculiar draw to arcane places was where the resemblance ended. Harlowe was much softer then Larkspur, having been raised as a pack wolf, and it showed.

While he worked the boy as hard as he could, Larkspur could not rely on him for food. Furthermore, as a Jager, his role was to hunt not only for himself but for the pack as a whole. Conor, whom Larkspur had seen only once, had never called upon him for this. Haku had known better then to ask. The only thing that Larkspur had owed Haku was battle, which he had participated in dutifully. Beyond that, he was left alone.

Larkspur enjoyed being alone. He never felt truly alone as long as he wore the can tah, for its whispering voice comforted him daily. Some nights, when he could not sleep, he would go back to the blue pool where he and Eris had gone (where the smell of death had left, buried in the earth) and stare into the water and listen. Sometimes the eagle spoke, and sometimes the water spoke. Larkspur held conversations with the spiders in the language of the dead, which they seemed to respond to.

This was his way. So too, was the hunt. He stalked through overgrown trails like a wraith, feet soft despite his large size. Ahead of him, a patch of underbrush moved. Almost instantly, the wolf had charged it. He spooked the hare into a chase, which lasted only seconds. He had been lucky in startling the now-dead hare, which hung triumphantly in his jaws. While the big male could have eaten the thing in a few bites, he began carrying it back towards his home. After all, he had to attend to his rather smart, but rather useless ward.

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#2
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401.



Jealousy of a sort coursed through her as crimson eyes watched from afar. How easily and skillfully the little hare lost its life was mentally recorded as Nayru surveyed the scene from high up in the tree she had climbed. The old oak towered above most others and she was well up in the branches, but her sharp eyes understood what was happening. Why could he kill and she could not? It should be in her blood, an instinct hard to ignore, but instead the idea of letting blood run from others was upsetting. Although she readily and happily accepted meat from Bris and Conor, she couldn’t bear to catch it herself. Silent, small Nayru was apt at stalking and sneaking, finding the game was not hard at all. She could track almost anything, wolves included, but coming upon them she could do no more.



As she lowered herself down, branch by branch, two hands holding on to the branch above her as two legs felt for footholds beneath, she thought about the spider she had killed once. It had been her only purposeful kill, although Nayru was sure that many other insects were subjected to a similar fate without her ever realizing it. The spider had of course made no noise as she squashed it beneath a clumsy puppy paw, but other animals would. Rabbits would squeak, birds caw, and other animals made similar noises right before death took them, unless one was swift enough. Nayru hadn’t heard it but she wondered if the hare the male carried in his maw had made such a noise, she shuddered thinking of it, but headed towards his direction once her feet met the ground.



Although without the aid of the oak tree’s vantage point the male was out of sight, she quickly found him again and was soon in his path way, her figure remarkable dainty in comparison to his, even as she stood taller than him on two feet. So delicate and thin she was, her size lent an air of grace as she bowed low to the male, one she knew not the name for. Meeting crimson eyes with golden ones, Nayru’s voice was fittingly gentle for her small self. ”Excuse me sir, my name’s Nayru.” She stood there, as if wanting something more, but not saying what, and just what that was Nayru wasn’t even sure she knew herself.



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#3
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It didn’t take long for the sound of feet to catch up with him. Larkspur slowed as they did. Not long after a black and white girl was in his way. The scarred wolf wondered if she dyed her white fur to get such an effect. His own had grown out in patches, but sections still carried orange-yellow bleach marks. Misery had not been around to aid him in a long time. Age was turning him white quite well, though he believed the bird-shaped mark on his chest was aided by the can tah around his neck. He had, after all, been chosen by it.

The girl was lithe and thin, more feline in her movement then canine, and he lifted his ears to her voice. It was, in his opinion, lovely. Certainly as pretty as her red eyes. The color red was still so fascinating to him. Dropping to his haunches the hunter placed his prize between his white paws. His orange eyes focused on her face, but no other signs of a traditional greeting would come from him. Larkspur lacked experience in social graces and this showed. “Larkspur. Y’need something?” That peculiar accent still clung to his voice, as it would for the rest of his life. His deep, strong tone sounded almost barbaric next to her own.

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#4
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Larkspur? Her mind drifted back through past conversations to pinpoint where she had heard that name before. When the right face was conjured up she smiled, Harlowe had said it. So this was the uncle who took in that boy? Which also meant this was one of the few pack wolves who had resided in Dahlia de Mai longer than her and whose path she had yet to cross. Well, better late than never. ”’Tis a pleasure to meet you Larkspur.” Ever proper she dipped her head low in greeting, deferring to what she was sure was a higher rank than her own and certainly an advanced age compared to her own scant months. Even as the male was too awkward to greet her as social protocol might require, she ignored it and did as she would, playing her part perfectly.




Perfectly until she realized she had yet to answer Larkspur’s question. Why had she so abruptly interrupted him? Crimson eyes strayed down to the dead rabbit once more, but her gaze was devoid of hunger or desire. She did not want the kill, she only wanted to know how he had made the kill. How did one take the life of another? It seemed such a simple matter, one easily determined by genetics, biology and a carnivore’s natural instincts. Why then had such instincts eluded her? ”Is hunting hard?” Not the right question came forth, not exactly. It spoke volumes of a childish naivety and it did not convey what she particularly meant, but she had trouble asking the charcoal male what she really meant, so she simply would wait. They’d work their way to it.





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#5
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He watched her performance, and some part of him instinctively recognized it was respect. He had seen others do the same to higher ranks, though he himself was ignorant of such trends. Lack of socialization had turned him into a brute, crushing any hope of normalcy from his life the moment he was treated differently because of his fur. That was changing, though. He was finding the right path because his fur was changing, and the scars on his arm told him this as well as the can tah, which even now whispered things he heard but did not respond to.

The girl looked at his kill. While there was no physical hunger in her eyes, he recognized the same shade he saw in his nephew and in King. A hunger for something greater then what they knew. Larkspur did not feel his face begin to smile, long before she asked a question that seemed too young for her intelligent face. The Jager flicked one ear. “No,” he said shortly. His pupils shrank for a moment, focusing inward, listening to a voice he alone heard, and then widened as if the answer had been provided to him. “Killin' ain’t that hard at all,” he added. He spoke this indifferently, as if the weight of life was something he did not understand.

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#6
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370.



No. The girl just looked up at the male, expecting more and felt a wave of relief when it came. Killin' ain’t that hard at all. As if he had read her mind. Perhaps he could sense the softness in her heart or there lingered uncertainties in her eyes or he recognized in her short comings he had seen in other. However he had read her mind, Nayru didn’t care, and she preferred her problem to be transparent so that she wouldn’t have to admit out loud that she was unable to do a task that others felt an instinctive pleasure in. Again her crimson eyes strayed to the carcass at the male’s feet, it did not stir any emotions in her then. Meat was just food, fuel for her body. Yet when it was breathing and alive, then it truly was something else. How to transform that something into food eluded her and Larkspur had realized this, which made the next words of the girl that much easier.


“How do you kill?” Again the true question was coded in the simple words. Nayru knew that to kill one only had to tear into the flesh of a weaker being; her fangs or claws or even weapons wielded in optime form could achieve this task. One only had to let out another’s blood loose and their life would leak away and then it would be as if they had never had one at all. Yet this was not what she asked, and her eyes and voice, soft and probing, asked the grizzled creature something else. They asked: how did one make the decision to steal another’s breath? How did one look on as another’s existence seeped out of their body?


The piebald fairy creature waited, hoping that this male, mostly a stranger except for a name, would be able to tell her what the others had failed to instill on her. Hoping that his answer wasn’t as simple as her questions had been, because Nayru knew that killing was not something that was just done and forgotten about. It just didn’t work that way, it couldn’t work that way, not for her.



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#7
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Perhaps he did see these things in her; weakness, doubt. Perhaps he could read her thoughts, as the can tah around his neck made him believe he could. Perhaps she was not all that different then his wards, though he doubted King would hesitate to kill. Larkspur’s eyes went foggy as he considered the quiet question, as if he was tearing apart the words and stitching them back together to make sense of the matter. Slowly, his eyes regained their focus, sharpening on the painted face of the little girl.

Incredibly, Larkspur smiled. “It’s ain’t that hard,” he repeated. His accent remained, but the words seemed clearer. “The first time is. After that it gits easy. It's prey.” He used this word but did not look to the rabbit. The rabbit was prey, but other things could be prey as well. Things with a conscious. Things with a soul. “Y’focus on prey and y’do what needs done. First time it’s gonna be rough. But then it gits easy.” In his simple world, this was all that needed to be said. He repeated himself because it was truly that simple. Larkspur knew what he killed felt. He had known that the first time a rabbit had screamed like a woman.

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#8
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The man’s answer disappointed her. How could it be so easy? Perhaps there was just something wrong with her, something defective. Conor and Bris had never said so, but perhaps they say it too and were just too kind. Still, Larkspur did not act that it was strange she did not kill; he merely accepted it and explained how and why she should. And she could. Nayru knew that she could, anyone could. And she would. If only once. Something with blood, not just a spider that she could in seconds squish the life out of. Something that would scream. If she could get over the noise, over the terror in another creature’s eyes than she could do it again. And again. And again.


“I want to kill something.” The words seemed misplaced coming from the soft, flowing voice. Everything about Nayru was gentle, accepting, loving and most of all soft. Her hand were soft from lack of use, her face soft from lack of experience, her voice soft as she never had to shriek or scream or be sharp for any reason. She was soft and she didn’t wish to be. The only hardness in her was her eyes, the same shade of the liquid she longed to spill, and there was conviction in them as she stared up at the grizzled male, as if he could grant her the request.






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#9
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He wondered, sometimes, if all children were the same. Lark had encountered the same sort of stubbornness in both his nephew and in King (whom he also looked down on as a nephew) and now saw it in this girl’s open face. She would need to learn to hide that. It would be a weakness if she could not. The dark wolf’s eyes went hazy for a moment, as if drawing inward. Perhaps he was. His ears twitched as if a voice was speaking, but the forest lacked any voices save those of noisy birds.

It did not take him long to come out of the momentary trance. “Y’know how to hunt?” He asked shortly, observing her small, delicate frame. Today’s lesson might be two-fold if she could not. Given her age, though, he doubted there was much experience. This too, was echoed by the scent of the young leader on her pelt. Conor had struck Larkspur as a weak person, much weaker than his father, and he didn’t doubt the boy’s softness would have worn off on his wards.

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#10
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Hey Mel, do you mind if we date this thread for around the 14? I like the direction this thread took and I want Nayru to kill something, but in threads dated pre 14th she makes reference to not killing stuff. If you’d rather not change the timing we can just have Nayru fail at life XD. 320.



The snowy pelt with charcoal stains moved only slightly as a breeze found them, but the muscles of the girl barely moved except to breathe as she patiently waited for the Jager to speak. Why ever he seemed to think so long on her words she did not care, so long as any sort of answer followed his silent trance. When the question was posed her small voice was serious, there was one thing Nayru did nearly flawlessly at even her young age. “I can track anything.” Wolves even, and on many occasions the Dahlians were victim to the girl’s watchful eyes. From tree tops, from under brush and well hidden in the folds of night’s cloak she could trail them and only those ever on guard knew she was there.


It had not always been so, but her natural aptitude for silence and the early experience in using her keen sense of smell had helped tremendously. And because she trailed others so well, she knew too that she could be trailed and was in the process of learning tricks to disguise her own scent. And if she chose, which at times she did not because there was still childish stubbornness in her and the want to feel as if she did not have to, she could be alert, she could be on guard, she could and would sense others before they sensed her. Yet it was not always she used this skill, and that was her downfall. She could, and her words to Larkspur held no embellishments.


“I’m quick and silent, I can come up to any prey animal almost.” This she had done on occasion after occasion, but the end results were always the same. “I just don’t know what to do after that.” And perhaps that was an incurable problem. Perhaps either one knew how to kill or not, but Nayru prayed it was a teachable skill.
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#11
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That's okay by me! Big Grin I'm having a lot of fun with this thread.

The girl was lithe, and he had no doubt her words were true. With her tiny paws and quiet voice he would not have been surprised if she was able to be silent in the forest. It was for this reason that he said nothing as she explained herself. To another, it might have sounded like bragging. So too often did children gloat of their small exploits, but adults were twice as bad because they were supposed to know better. Even if she did not, he would not have scolded her. If she could do then she would not be lying.

Perhaps she lacked that basic instinct he believed all predators had. Perhaps something was wrong in her that prevented that from occurring. Yet as the wolf looked into those bright eyes, he doubted this was the case. Whatever else the girl was, she could be a killer. All children could be taught to kill. They were moldable little things, and he now understood why it was Misery had wished for him to have children. “Let’s find a rabbit,” he said, sparing a glance to the dead thing at his feet. A mouse would be easier, or a vole. But a rabbit would do what neither of these things could.

A rabbit would scream.

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#12
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Huzzah.



Nayru sucked in her breath, as if not expecting such a speedy response. Was she truly to kill something that day then? The idea made her heart beat quick but she willfully slowed it to a normal pace again. I must stay calm. Allowing her emotions to rear up would be foolish, although suppressing them would be hard. Impossible perhaps whens he had the helpless creature before her. The image of the rabbit made her heart lurch and her stomach churn, but with Larkspur watching her so intently she couldn’t show this, didn’t allow herself to. Nor could she turn back, it was go time.


Idly she wondered if he would prefer her to shift to her lupus form, but surely the male would have no qualms of telling her to shift if he did. Merely she bowed her head to him, “Okay, a rabbit,” and turned her head towards the vineyards. The overgrown grasses and fields there held rabbits, this she knew. If she wanted to find one, there would be no trouble. Crimson eyes held his for a moment longer, and then taking the lead she moved in that direction, her body suddenly on autopilot.



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#13
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He could have told her where to find the best rabbits, or how to hunt, but this was not his duty. He could have turned her away and sent her back home, to a leader who was so weak in Larkspur’s eyes he did not see him as such. Yet the D’Angelo was quiet as he watched her eyes flicker and change, watched as she considered and finally made up her mind. His face did not move. He had boys who were learning to do this same thing—King responding better than Harlowe, but without the same conviction—and did not need to waste his time on a girl-child.

A voice whispered in his ears and they swiveled, but his face betrayed nothing. He had learned much since coming to these lands. Larkspur rose to his feet and followed after her, a broad-shouldered wolf with burning eyes. They could have been kin, given both their odd fur patterns. “If this is how y’hunt,” he grunted, speaking of her form. “Y’best keep an eye open fer the holes.” He had almost twisted a paw slipping in one, and was certain she could do the same with her small feet. “When y’do catch it—“ when, not if “—I’ll tell y’what to do.” It still surprised him she would not know instinctively. Then again, Larkspur was utterly devoid of pack-wolf instincts himself.


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#14
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The words came but Nayru made no reply aside from a small nod of her head. Why she had given herself up so entirely to Larkspur and his guidance she wasn’t sure, but like a dutiful student she did as she was told without speech. It did not take long to catch a scent and Nayru changed course, her eyes and ears suddenly coming to life. Each sound and flicker of motion was taken in by her senses, examined in seconds and forgotten about when they yielded no help towards tracking the rabbit. The scent became thicker and Nayru suddenly felt clumsy in her optime form. Hunting on four legs would have been easier, but she felt the time had passed and she simply would have to figure it out on two legs rather than four.


It darted out and Nayru was like lightning, following the creature with long strides. So quickly did she move she could have had the rabbit in seconds but something in her held back and let the chase pan out longer than necessary. Easily she came up to it, the frightened creature fleeing before her as she kept pace behind it and pricked her ears for the voice of Larkspur. What could he possible say to convince her to kill? She could still quit, still let it go and just leave. Yet knowing his eyes followed her, judged her forced her to bend down, ready to scoop up the poor animal. She had it.



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#15
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This was what power felt like. Larkspur now realized why it had driven Haku mad (if he had not been mad before it was given) and drank in the knowledge like fine wine. The girl was not only obeying him, but she did so without question. A rush ran through his body, causing the hair along his spine to stand on end. It was deliriously wonderful sensation. The hunter’s jaws parted to reveal yellowing teeth and he drank in the scents around him. Anticipation rolled off the girl in waves, masking the fear-scent under this. There were a thousand other smells and distractions but the wolf was a single-minded predator and knew what awaited them.

She ran and he followed, a step or two behind, certain that she was playing with the frightened thing. This made the corners of his mouth curl up into a terrible grin. Only when she was close enough did his voice break the moment. “It’s back,” he barked, certain she was not skilled enough to snap the neck. Beyond this he had other plans in mind—if she hesitated to make the killing blow (which he believed she would) the poor animal’s voice would beg her to do so in a shriek.

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#16
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It’s back. Nayru forced herself not to think and just act. The male’s voice as he raced along beside her guided her and it was only the crack of bone that jolted her from the daze. The noise that the animal made was unbearable, and though it lasted only half a second or two before Nayru realized the only way make the animal stop was to kill it, it seemed the noise lasted an eternity. The squeal of the wounded animal caused her to reconsider her hesitance and sink her fangs in further, using also her claws to rip at the skin of the poor creature. Even once the death scream of the rabbit was silenced Nayru kept tearing at the creature, and undoubtedly it was dead by the time she ceased and collapsed at the feet of Larkspur.


When it was all through carnage covered her for the first time, the warm red liquid sweet and coppery on her lips and her delicate white fingers stained scarlet like her eyes. Her heart was hammering and a sort of exhilaration shot through her, so intense it was that she found she felt no sorrow or remorse for the life she had taken. Turning those ruby eyes up at the male, Nayru did not say anything but merely clutched the dead rabbit to her and waited, suddenly unsure of what to do with the carcass now that the hunt was complete.



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#17
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ooc talk:Mind if I join? Kinda late to join...


Reverent padded away from the Ocean and had come across a forest. She loved exploring them, seeing what she could find. So as she walked through the forest she let the carful breeze of the wind flow through her fur and carry her forward. Reverent liked walking in her Optime form. She felt like she could have seen the world from the height.


As she walked through the trees she had heard a noise which souded like paws meeting earth. She stood frozen and listened her eyes had shown distence. A few moments later a small animal passed her then a white and black female pup and a black male had ran after it. Reverent snapped out of the daze she had been in and decided to follow the two wolves she had just seen.


She had not been a member of Dahlia long and thought it to be good to meet as many Dahlians as she was capable of meeting. She padded after them following the scent as she went. She used the tree shadows to cover her and the wind to guide her twoard the unknown wolves she had seen.

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#18
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A sweet and terrible scream broke from the scrawny rabbit’s throat. The black and white wolf opened his mouth as if to savor the sound on his tongue. It tasted like copper and sunk down his throat. Larkspur stopped running almost instantly. Still as death the scarred wolf waited, saw her not only kill but rend the beast as she struck. His pupils widened once more, seeking to swallow the image whole. Blood not that different from the color of her eyes had stained the pretty white fur he himself so envied.

Then the can tah whispered and Larkspur’s eyes sharpened at an uncanny speed. His ears turned before his head did, whipping around to the land behind them. Though they were upwind, he could hear the approaching stranger. The burly male bristled. He was not used to his own pack sneaking around him. The Khalif were different. The Khalif might have done so with blood on their mind. With the memory of this and the shadows of a war hanging over him the D’Angelo was tense. “Y’best come out,” he warned. If the stranger was a foe, he would deal with them as such.

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#19
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The male said nothing and Nayru’s eyes eventually moved back to the carcass she clutched in her hands. The mangled body barely resembled a rabbit any longer, and none of the soft fur of the creature was without blood stains. Slowly the rush of the hunt drained from her and Nayru became conscious of what she had done. She had killed. It had been just as easy as Larkspur had said, and the fairy child couldn’t remember what had ever held her back from this. If killing a defenseless creature was this easy, was it then just as easy to take the life of a canine? Nayru looked to Larkspur but before she could ask anything he stiffened and called out.


So mesmerized by the mutilated creature and the smell of copper Nayru had not noticed the scent of the stranger. It was vaguely familiar, a scent she had found often around Dahlia de Mai and encountered once. The whale. Whoever was coming had been there to help save the whale. What vastly different situations those were. Saving a life as opposed to take it. Suddenly she felt very exposed and naked, covering in another’s blood for the first time. Having Larkspur see her like this was an honor, he was the one who had made it possible, but for anyone else to see her made Nayru suddenly feel very shy. This was private, the blood and gore and mess was her’s and now someone else would see her like a madwoman with red hands. Holding her breath she braced herself, still grasping the rabbit like her life depended on it.



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#20
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ooc talk:


Reverent had heard the male call out to her. Though she doubted he knew he had spoken to her, she was amazed at how he had heard her. She was using the wind to hold most of her weight. She stepped out from behind the tree she had hid behind. She stood tall in her Optime form. She noticed the smaller black and white pup, she thought that the pup had looked familiar but passed it. She turned her attention back at the male. Her blue eyes met his amber ones. She was curious about this wolf, he seemed more mysterious than the other wolves she had met. She had a brief thought that he may have had a bad past as she had with her brother and the fire.


"Hello. My name is Reverent. Hope I'm not disturbing anything..." She watched the male with her blue eyes. Unsure of what she had to expect from him. She knew if he had a bad past, like she, he might not be so easy to talk to as the others she had met were. In the back of her mind she still hadn'tn been able to figure out why the other wolf had looked so familiar. The smell and the look... she had lost thought of that as she focused on the male once more. She locked him in her gaze waiting for a response...

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