ooc text

Pripyat Soul stood at the edge of the world, or at least what he perceived to be the edge of the world. Or to be more exact it was only the edge of his own personal world, not the whole world. At the southern end of the pack lands, Phoenix Valley melted into the salty water of the Atlantic just as dawn was beginning to creep over the lands and it was here Pripyat stood frozen, his sapphire eyes straining to see further than the horizon allowed. There was something out there, he knew that and whatever it was Pripyat longed for it. Had longed for it since his return from his short trip outside of the pack lands. Inferni wasn't anything like the distant continent that Pripyat imagined was somewhere past all the water, but it had been something different. It wasn't slow and steady like the life he knew, predictable and comfortable. Phoenix Valley was secure, Phoenix Valley was secure. Phoenix Valley was boring.

The boy stood there, his breath escaping his lips in frozen clouds as he breathed heavily, a weight on his heart causing him to draw in and exhale more air than was required. It wasn't the longing to travel, the desire to seek out excitement, which caused his lungs to fruitlessly try and compensate for feelings of emptiness. It was the realization that he might want something more than what Phoenix Valley had. How could he ever explain that to Mother? To Jefferson? It would surely be a disappointment to them both. And the desire not to disappoint either of them triumphed his wanderlust. Yet his love for them, his obligation to Phoenix Valley, didn't keep his mind from wandering. And his wandering mind worked best staring out at the ocean, which is where the boy remained, long after dawn came and went, his gaze transfixed the a place he would probably never see and might not even exist at all, or least not the way he imagined it to.

SSWM : 375

Young Prince. The words caused him to turn his head, although he had heard the footfalls of the male and his scent had made its way up into Pripyat's nostrils moments before the other spoke. Bright eyes regarded the other, his posture, his one blind eye and the smoky color of his fur. He knew this wolf in the way he knew many of the Phoenix Valley members, only because he was the leader's son and that put him in a place to know everyone without really knowing them at all. He saw them coming and going from the ranch when they wanted his parents. He saw them at pack gatherings. He smelt them on the land. He knew their names. Yet he never really spoke to many of them. Still, they were family, because Phoenix Valley was still, and would always be, home. "Noah.”

The boy turned his whole body then and bowed his head low to the man who outranked him with age if not actual rank. Pripyat was still learning to live with the ranks, holding his first adult rank only recently. Before his father had bestowed Tueris upon him he had been nothing. A Tyro. A Tyke. A child. Now he was expected to be among the adults, and act as they did. Pripyat did his best, but his youthfulness couldn't help but break through. “I am no Prince.” He halfway smiled as he mulled over the concept. Jefferson did have the throne to Phoenix Valley, with his mother beside him as his queen, but he was still just Pripyat Soul. Child to the leader perhaps, but undeserving of the respect that his parents had obtained. He would have to, and wished to, gain his own rank, his own respect and not emerge out from Jefferson's shadow, although he had liked it there well enough mere months ago.

Raising his head once more, the smile faded from his face but his eyes remained merry. Pripyat was attentive then to Noah, though his mind was still in a distant land and he saw Noah not only in Phoenix Valley but miles away, past the ocean and it was there they spoke. “How are you today Noah? Well I hope.”

SSWM : 395

Pripyat was surprised at the man's word. Don't bow to him? No one had ever refused his respect before, or rather the physical expression of such respect. Yet it was his respect for Noah that caused him to raise his head again and note not to bow down to Noah. If Noah wished it to be that way than Pripyat would comply and not question it. Instead he smiled pleasantly at the man, if somewhat confused, and nodded as the man asked how he was. “I'm well too.” And he was. There were no physical ailments to complain of and the weather was good, so why wouldn't he be well? The heaviness that weighted down his spirits wasn't to be mentioned, it wasn't to be acknowledge.

Yet acknowledged it was, and Pripyat hadn't said a word. Noah's question confused the boy for a moment, what was stopping him from what? Turning to look over his shoulder towards the ocean as Noah had the meaning clicked into place. Was it so easy then to read the longing on his face? Or did Noah feel similarly? Or was it simply something that all youths went through and Noah was just old enough and wise enough to guess at the young boy's heart. Pripyat didn't know and he wouldn't ask, he simply sighed heavily and shrugged his shoulders.

The source of his unrest was unknown to the boy, all he knew was that his feet were itching to take him someplace. Any place. His eyes longed to see sights that couldn't be contained within Phoenix Valley. He wanted to meet new people and do new things and once in a while he wanted to forget about home and his family and all the members of Phoenix Valley. Forget them for just a little while with the understanding that he could never really let them go. Wouldn't ever to really ever let them go, even if the desire to arose, which it hadn't. But it might. And that perhaps was what was holding him back.

“What if I go someplace, and then I don't want to come back? That's what is stopping me.” Was it silly? Stupid? Illogical? He had free will, he was the master of his own future. Nothing could keep him from Phoenix Valley except himself, and that was the most terrifying idea of all.

SSWM : 352

The man's stutter was more pronounced and Pripyat wondered if this was why he hadn't heard him speak much at the meeting before. Was it just a speech impediment the man had had since birth, or had something happened? The wonder was harmless, for the silver tinted boy did not mind the slow speech and was actually rather glad of it. He never was one much for words, more so than his father perhaps, but he could say a lot with a little. He preferred to listen, which was perhaps why it was usually he asking questions rather than answering them, and Noah spoke slowly, giving Pripyat ample time to listen and mull over his words and their meaning.

“Yes, I will always have a home here.” To this he agreed, but that did not dispel the fear that if he found a home someplace else, or a place that felt like a home, would he want to return to the Valley? Perhaps Noah was right, he should just try. He shouldn’t fight it, for if he never wandered out he would never know and would be forced to wonder 'what if' for the rest of his life. The idea of wondering 'what if' was unbearable, he was wondering that now and it made him restless and stir-crazy.

His ears perked at the next statement. It was an idea, and not one he had considered. Often he wondered just what he would eventually settle into, how he would rank in Phoenix Valley. As a very young child he had dreamed of helping to lead with Jefferson, but older now he was more realistic, less ambitious. He would be just as happy doing something else, so long as his mother and father were proud of him. To be a peacekeeper between pack could have been a natural fit, it would give him reason to wander, but what if the interest and itch of adventure did not burn out after conquering the neighboring packs?

“Noah, what's beyond all the packs though? I mean out farther? What's across the ocean?” Did the man even know?

SSWM : 461

Noah seemed to consider Pripyat's inquiry and the boy wasn't too pleased with the man's answer. Nothing Good. Ocean eyes searched the other's face, waiting for further explanation and he was not disappointed. Rape, murder and all sorts of sins and injustices seemed to lurk out across the waters, or so Noah reported. His credentials he gave, he had come from somewhere outside Phoenix Valley, somewhere across the ocean perhaps. And his words made him think of the unpleasant lady in Inferni. She had been hostile for no reason really, and if she could treat him so there really was little keepings others from treating the innocent worse.

Phoenix Valley was nothing like that. It was nothing like Inferni, which a dark cloud seemed to hang over. The Valley was a sanctuary, not just to him but to many it seemed. Everyone he came across in the Valley was pleasant and kind. Many of them seemed to have past baggage, but they were healing here. Even those who did not live in the Valley healed here, Bindu had gone but Pripyat could remember the strange girl who had boarded in the ranch house for many nights. It was hard to imagine wanted to be outside the haven, out where bad things could happen, but even Noah's description of all the awful things that could happen did not make Pripyat want to stay inside the comfort of Phoenix Valley forever.

“Maybe all those bad things happen out there because there is no one willing to stop them?” Surely there were more good guys than bad guys out there. More heros than villains. Or maybe there were just more ordinary people than villains. Maybe they needed a hero. Pripyat thought about peace keeping between the packs again, but maybe that wasn't enough. They could keep peace between each other, but they would really have to start caring about one another to expel all the cruelty from the world. They would have to come to the aid of one another. Or they would have to support those who did. Maybe Pripyat could be one of those good guys. One of those heros.

“Have you ever done anything really great? Like saved someone or anything?” Perhaps it was a strange question to ask, but Noah was patient and the boy liked to listen to the man speak. And the man didn’t seem to mind, so Pripyat saw nothing wrong with opening up to the grizzled man as much as he wished. In a way, perhaps because of their scars, either on their bodies or on their souls (it was perhaps their past that made them such good listeners), Noah reminded Pripyat of Jefferson, and it was a comfort to talk so easily to the adult.

SSWM : 375

Maybe Lad. It was all Noah could offer the boy and Pripyat felt that the man was holding back. Holding out. The creature before him certainly had more years on the young boy, and with those years came life experience. Although he did not say it outright, Pripyat felt that Noah was not in agreement with him. That maybe bad things just happened, and there was no stopping them. Maybe there was no reason or rhyme or anything that could be explained with words and one just had to do the best they could in a world where evil could and would hurt the innocent. That Noah did not say any of this did keep Pripyat from feeling it, and suddenly he felt very foolish for thinking he could change anything.

And then Noah answered the next question and Pripyat’s hopes fell further. Tried. Tried once. Tried once and failed and nope I have never saved nobody and nobody’s gonna save me and what has this world come to anyway? Noah did not say as much, again, but the boy filled in the blanks for himself. The inner monologue that accompanied Pripyat’s thoughts surely did not aligned to Noah’s real ideas, but they were the closest Pripyat could come to, watching the hardened male’s face as he tried to answer the boy without hurting the boy. It hurt anyway.

“Well… I don’t want to be a hero.” And he didn’t. Pripyat didn’t want to be anything more than what he already was, he just wanted to put his being to use. What good did he do now, hanging around the ranch and shadowing the adults of Phoenix Valley as they lived their lives? What good did it do to just sit on the shorelines, day dreaming about going someplace else? “I just want to do good, I just want to help people.” That wasn’t a hero, that was just what anyone and everyone should want. “I just want there to be more good in this world than bad…” Was that really too much to ask? His ocean eyes seemed intense then, more receptive as he watched Noah’s face, waiting for the next installment of words that Noah didn’t ever speak but that Pripyat heard anyway.

SSWM : 316

The boy reguarded the stuttering man with more reverence than he had before. Although Noah did not take back his previous words or amended them, he looked more encouragingly at Pripyat then. He could sense the loss of optimism that had come from the boy, but he also seemed to know that as youthful and bright as the prince was it was a fleeting feeling. He was still malleable, still unhardened by how own life experiences and ideas as close to his heart as heroism weren’t to be chased away so easily. Perhaps laid away, but not laid to rest. Despite this he could not muster up the same determination he had had only moments before. It would come back to him, as he wandered from Phoenix Valley, he would see bad things happen to good people and he would feel injustice. He would yearn to fix it. And maybe he would. But for now he only nodded.

“I will.” He assured Noah. He would keep the thought not in his head but in his heart and he wouldn’t let anyone tell him differently. But he did not wish to discuss it further. When Noah looked over him, analyzing the boy and his motives and finding something of himself in the lad, Pripyat smiled. To imagine Noah as a child was strange, and then turning his thought to his father it became impossible. What had Jefferson been like in his youth, had he been anything like Pripyat? If he had, would Pripyat grow up to be anything like the grizzled Phoenix Valley leader? Or maybe old Noah? Or more like his mother? Or the others that he saw daily but never considered too deeply. Did it matter? He would be himself, the best he could, and he could only hope that was enough. “I will.” The words came again, with a little more conviction this time.

SSWM : 367

The question that Noah posed then caused a jolt in the heavy heart of the boy. Here or Inferni? The mention of the damned coyote clan almost turned Pripyat’s inside to liquid, or so it felt. Did Noah know of the boy’s adventure there? And how Addison had come to his rescue and how horrible the silver prince felt for bringing her adoptive sister into the mix. It had been a mistake perhaps, but they had both come home alive and that was something. They were still alive and it was behind them. Behind him unless Pripyat felt as if he needed to start in Inferni. Which he didn’t.

“I don’t know.” The words were mumbled and Pripyat’s eyes once more were turned to the ocean. Perhaps he should start out there, somewhere out there. Yet his life was here and here seemed the best place to start. Only that there wasn’t anything evil within the haven of Phoenix Valley. He would start in neither Inferni or Phoenix Valley, he knew that then, and his words were a little clearer. “I will start wherever there is need for me. I am not going to go looking for wrongs to right, but when I come across one I will do my best.” And that was all anyone could ask of the boy, to do his best and not let any injustices happen before his eyes without some sort of a fight.

Swiftly he turned back to Noah, his eyes intense and his voice serious. Should he tell the man? Pripyat hadn’t planned on telling anyone, after begging Addison not to tell his father or mother. Yet he had opened up so much to the man already it felt only natural. “I went to Inferni recently.” he swallowed but found suddenly that his mouth was dry. “There is a lot of unhappiness there I think, too much for anyone to undo.” Or at least the vile woman who had greeted him made him feel so. If Inferni allowed it’s members to act in such a manner than Addison had been right in telling him it was a bad place. Rotten and best to be avoided. For now at least.

Wrap it up soon? SSWM : 347

The ocean eyes of the boy watched Noah’s face for any changes as the stuttering man took in the new information. Noah was not a father to Pripyat, but many in Phoenix Valley had taken a role in the development of Pripyat. It was as if the whole pack was privy to parenting him, guiding him, telling him this or that. So many influences had gone into molding him as a child, and still as an adolescent and it would probably continue on into his adulthood. Yet their teachings all meshed so well, and Pripyat was not surprised to find that Noah held a similar view on Inferni as the others had. It was a sad fact, but Pripyat knew he too believed this now. Addison had been right, his father was right and Noah too was right. Inferni was best left alone. And although the man’s words echoed Pripyat’s statement, he did not prod the boy about why he had been there and so Pripyat was grateful to let it drop.

Ears perked again as the older man made a joke, but Pripyat sensed the uneasiness beneath it. Don’t go looking for trouble. That had been exactly what he had been doing when he had trekked all the way up to Inferni. Yet it had been a wonderful and terrifying experience, and overall educational. Had he not met the awful coyote woman he perhaps wouldn’t believe Noah’s words now, but as it were he found them to be a solid truth. “I won’t.” Pripyat wouldn’t pick a fight, that wasn’t his intention. His only intention was to uphold justice for those who couldn’t do it themselves… although he wasn’t sure how he was to do that without picking a fight. Sighing heavily he attempted a smile at Noah, but he was growing weary of thinking over all of this. His life had purpose, he felt that now. He would travel and do good deeds and help those who needed it, but it was so tiring already and he just wished for his mind to be blank.