Okay, critique time!! 8D
#1
So, I've got this grumpy fella in my head for a while already, adn I'm waiting to have Liev more settled, so I can request him. If you guys see anything weird about him, or anything I got wrong, tell me, and I'll change <3

Name: Demir Farrah Eysentlei
Gender: Male
Sexuality: Assexual
Age: 7
Luperci: Y, Ortus
Heritage: 60% Canis lupus familiaris (mostly Irish Wolfhound and German Sheperd), 35% Canis lupus dingo (Dingo), 5% Canis lupus lupus (Eurasian Wolf)

Biography: He was born near Indonesia, on the very south of the once China, in a pack that wished to preserve the knowledge of the humans. Being so close to one of the last havens for the endangered kind, they longed to learn from them, and so far, they were able to conserve the chinese city, though very few of them got to translate the Chinese dialect. Demir had grown very attatched to the unknown creatures, and when he learned of the wars they fought, the boy longed to understand how did they made their weapons so powerful and deadly. He was 2 back then.
Two years of intense researchs earned him the rediscovery of gun powder, which he found some samples in some fireworks around the cities. After studying it further, the male found they're explosive nature, and learned how to produce more of it and how to make explosives with it.
Once he was happy with his achievements, the wolfdog divulged his findings to the pack. Unfortunately, it was a huge mistake.
Soon, the pack began to threaten the nearby ones with their new explosives, bombs and grenades. They started to mass-produce the powder, not listening tyo Demir's warnings and protests.
An enemy pack, however, attacked his pack by surprise and seized their lands, searching for him, so they would learn of the gun powder. Scared, he hid away in the warehouse where they were keeping their stocks. Then, he understood they would never give up until they knew everything there was to know. Cornered with that thought, he decided what to do, and started a fire in the warehouse, before jumping off the window of the building into the sea right next door. The huge explosion, however, met him before he was inside the water, the fire, metal and wood pieces striking the right side of his body.
When he woke up, in the other side of the shore, the city was in ruins and both the enemies as his greedy, snoby late packmembers. He collected all of his belongins and left in one of the remaining boats, sailing east, knowing only he was going to find land, sometime.
Eventually, he settled down at the shore of Mexico. Ever since, he had been traveling, working as a wandering blacksmith, taking requests from other wanderers, loners or some packs, then moving along. He knew that if he stayed there too long, they'd find out of his knowledge, and history would repeat itself. And he surely did NOT wanted that.
As a consequence to always remind him of it, his right side it full of awful-looking scars all around his body, especially on his face, arm and leg.

Appearance: Demir have quite bulky arms and chest, though the rest of his body is bit less muscled. He's tall, but rather thin-looking, as part of his Irish Wolfhound heritage. Also, his fur is rather shaggy and slightly curly on the very tips. he have folded ears, and on the tips of his muzzle and chin, his fur grows bushy, forming a sort of beard. His pelt is a mix of the sandy brown and beige of a dingo, but have lighter, creamy color over his chest, throath and belly, as well as under his tail and parts of his face. Darker brown markings on the tips of the fur where it grows thicker and longer, like his back, neck, mane, berd, tail, and feet. His mane is long and shaggy, usually held in a high, tight ponytail.
The right side of his body is terribly mauled by his scars, but most of the damage is on his face, where his eye got so wounded and infected it got blind, and he was forced to take it off, and yet, the infection is not fully gone. In bad days, it leaks pus and bleeds, plus the strong headache it gives him. He's always wearing a white cloth, improvised eye patch. The right leg was broken in two places, and the knee dislocated. He managed to place it back, but the other injuries did not quite healed, and now his lower leg is slightly deformed, though not visible from the outside. If the bone is touched, one can feel the irregularities. It hurts a bit during the cold, or if he stands for too long, and he's forced to use a crutch to move around. The right arm, however, is the worse. The explosion hitted it dead on, and the heat burned most of his skin deeply. Most of it can't grow fur anymore, and those areas are usually dark with hematomas of deep red from irritation or allergy with the external environment. Whenever he hav to go out in the sun or work in the forge, he have to wear a leather sleeve glove that goes from his fingers to this shoulder, and is held up by some leather straps that crosses his neck and upper chest.
When he's working, he wears a thick leather apron that covers his chest and belly, and drags down to his knees, and two belts with two pouches in one, for minor, delicate intruments, while the other, thicker, helds most of his hammers, forceps, and others.

Skills: Blacksmithing, making and use of gunpowder, and making and manipulation of glass.
#2
You might want to reconsider the domestic dog breeds you chose. While Irish Wolfhounds and Shepherds are very popular in the US, they are likely less common in China. Additionally, dogs of that size (Wolfhounds) would have some issues surviving with their size. Mutts are very commonplace in Asia, given that they are a food source. "Yellow dogs", which are the US equivalent of Carolina Dogs, would be a more likely source for your character's dog breeds.

Smile
#3
Gunpowder and explosives aren't allowed at 'Souls. :> I'm not entirely sure about the fireworks, other admins will have to weigh in on that, but according to the RP Guide, "Heavy ordnance -- artillery, rocket launchers, grenades, mines, and anything else that might explode -- is not allowed." I would class gunpowder under "things that might explode," certainly, but as for fireworks... IDK. They're not actually weapons, heh. It still might be a bit high-tech for 'Souls -- I'm really not comfortable allowing a character that has working gunpowder. x_o Guns are, after all, not allowed to work at 'Souls.


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