If I Die Today.. Will They Care Tomorrow?

Mizu Kuin · 04-14-2011, 12:15 PM

[html]

takes place at Queen of Piety Cemetery.

Mizu was crying again. Would she ever stop? She thought that by now her tears would have run out. But they still kept coming. When would her life be better? The weird thing was though, that her life was great. She just kept getting replays of all her bad times. She was no longer smoking or drinking and she had a home. She had made a wonderful friend and yet she still thought her life sucked. All the good times she had with her father and her sister were flashing before her eyes, making her miss them even more. The guilt of almost hurting another wolf was heavy on her shoulders. The want to smoke and drink dragged her to the ground. And the feeling of not being needed at Crimson Dreams was painful. These were all thoughts though. Nothing recently had happened to her to make her hurt.

She walked to a place that seemed to be where the dead were kept. There were stones sticking out of the ground that had names and dates on them. Riley White. Age 4. A broken heart the world forgot. Mizu's heart lurched at the words. This young person was only 4 when she died. She knew this was young for humans. What had happened? She shook it off. She wished that she could die. Then she could be put in the ground next to this grave. She could have a stone say her name on it, her age and a saying. Would anyone even care if she was dead? Perhaps Teo? Tears streamed down her face and she collapsed to the ground. Her breath came in short gasps as she struggled with her breath. Her lungs seemed to be filled with water. Maybe she was dying. Good. No one would care anyway. She cried more, it was a scary thought. But it would be better for everyone.

#00+

[/html]

Alae Sidhe · 04-14-2011, 08:50 PM

[html]

300+

          Upon travels to Dahlia de Mai, Alae and Kael crossed paths with an ancient winding asphalt road to Halifax. While they weren't aware of how large the city of ruins actually was, Alae knew well enough from her life as a rogue that old asphalt roads led to extinct human villages. They were about to make the detour to Halifax before arriving at the Dahlian borders, but continued to press forth in the sense if there was a refuge to be sought further. Finding this comfortable settlement in Dahlia, Alae made it her prerogative to backtrack to the wide and long road herself and Kael almost followed. Once jumping upon the cracked and worn path, the Sidhe and the owl began to follow the road into the city limits.

          The best part about human villages were the items scavenged from them. It was a free for all, and from the size of this place, there was a lot to hoard through. It would take days for Alae to scour the city to collect as many items and objects deemed useful as she could, but there were only so many hours in a day, and the fact that human villages usually contained some not so pleasant company waiting for their next lone victims to pass through (Alae learned that lesson a couple miles back, almost falling prey to robbery and assault by a pack of rogue males in an abandoned town).

          Collecting miscellaneous and meaningless things such as paper clips, string, ribbon, and whatever little things could fit in her leather worn bag, Alae and Kael (perched upon her shoulder; he had been fatigued from flying solo ahead of her all day) briskly were making ways back out of the city. Taking the route that cut into the largest cemetery of the city, many of the tombstones were worn down, and unmarked graves were everywhere. They would have passed right through the cemetery as poltergeists themselves, until Alae heard sobbing and a white figure kneeling in front of a tombstone.

          The woman was small. There were markings of what appeared to be blue dye upon her shoulders, ears, mane, and tail. Apparently she was very upset, and Alae approached her until she was merely hovering behind her. Able to catch a glance written on the tombstone, Alae was slightly puzzled as to why this Luperci was mourning a human by the name of Riley White. "Unlike rain to roots, tears to the dead won't sprout them back to life anymore." Alae spoke softly, her statement gentle but a little cryptic. Humans were remarkable creatures in their time, but Alae never truly understood why some Luperci held them so high on the pedestal. They were all extinct; they must have obviously not been that strong to survive.

[/html]

Mizu Kuin · 04-19-2011, 12:05 PM

[html]

again, sorry for the wait!

Mizu stiffened at the sound of a voice. She twitched her ears, holding back a shudder. She sucked in her tears, trying to talk. "I'm not crying for the girl. I'm crying for my pathetic life. I'm crying because I don't want to live anymore.. but that thought scares me. But I want it to come true." Tears fell from her eyes again. It was strange that she just spilled out her feelings to a stranger that she had no idea who they were. She hadn't even looked at the wolf. And she didn't really want to. She burried her face in her hands, trying to calm herself. But that just made her cry harder. She sniffled and more tears spilled over her face. They dropped onto the ground, dampining the soil below her face.

Breathing became hard again. She gasped, scared but happy that maybe she was suffocating. Would she die right here? In front of a wolf she hadn't even looked at? She thought about Teo. He would be sad to see her like this.. he had made her feel better, but only for the day. She gently touched the necklace that accomponied her yin-yang with her fingertips. He seemed to appear infront of her. He offered her kind and gentle words. However she was sure that Teo had probably forgotten her by now. Her shoulders shook as her hand that was touching the necklace went to the ground to steady herself. More tears came down. They didn't seem to slow, just speed up. Why couldn't she stop feeling bad for herself? No one should feel bad for her, she was a pathetic wimp and dirty nasty wolf who deserved to die. She muttered under her breath quitely, but loud enough for the wolf behind her to hear, "No one would care if I died, so why can't I just work up the nerve to jump off a dang cliff?"

#00+

[/html]

Alae Sidhe · 04-19-2011, 09:13 PM

[html]

500+

Refusing to have any attentiveness to the Dahlian woman behind her, the pale female wept about her pitiful life and how she wanted to end it here and now. Letting the woman's words echo in silence across the graveyard, Alae accepted the fate of death and dying long ago. Nearly to the point where death wasn't feared by the Sidhe, death stood for a marking of the natural process of every single organism upon this world. According to Buddhism (a belief system that appealed most to Alae), death wasn't particularly the end of life, but the end of the body an individual inhabits. The spirit still remained, seeking out the need of attachment, attachment to a new body and life. In this female's case, Alae couldn't understand why she would want to surrender her beauty at this point in her life. She was ripe, young yet, even while Alae couldn't see her face with her back still turned to her, the Dahlian didn't doubt this woman was a figure of beauty in her youth. "Death won't be the end of your life. Your physical, yes, but not your spirit." Alae began, her words still soft-spoken and catering as gentle to the saddened woman. "Your spirit will still feel frustration and the wrath you feel now about your life, with or without your body. Even if you die, your frustrations will carry on to your next reincarnation. You could come back as a very irritable ant." The thought sounded silly, and while Alae did attempt to add some humor to her explanation, she was still very sincere with sharing and reflecting her beliefs upon this woman.

While Alae certainly wasn't a mindreader in the least, the Sidhe sensed there was an inferno and a fury of a storm brewing within her. Whatever troubles seemed to cause her to choose the option of death instead of carrying on to seem another tomorrow were most likely deep, penetrating issues of the soul. It was easy for anyone to feel like their last breath would be upon them once their world shattered to pieces, but Alae felt like it was an obligation to help this poor woman make sense of her frustrations. Remaining silent for several moments, Alae shook her head to herself in disagreement to the woman's words. "Nonsense." Alae replied to her, tenderly disagreeing. "From the fish, to the birds, to the worms in the Earth, everything has a purpose in this life. It might not be somebody who won't care, but something in this world will be disturbed by your death." Nobody needed to emotionally care for anything that died to make it a memory or feel sorrowed by it. Mother Nature herself was constantly plagued with depression over extinction of whole species, of plants and life dying with each and every season, each and every day. Anything that died in this world, has some sort of impact upon the world itself, no matter how significant it was. With this, Alae suddenly grinned. Stepping forward, a hand was placed upon the woman's shoulder in a gentle manner. "Because your instinct will not allow you. Your instinct is fighting for your survival, beyond what your emotions tell you." It was a simple philosophy many fell out of touch with.

[/html]

Mizu Kuin · 04-22-2011, 12:26 PM

[html]

Mizu listened to the woman. She sounded wise. If her spirit felt the same things she was feeling right now then.. What was the point of ending her life? It sounded strange to her. She thought that once you were dead you were gone and up in Heaven. Well.. That is if God forgave her for all the sins she had done. From Heaven she would be able to watch over the ones the loved. Even if they didn't love her right? Maybe she had been wrong about everything. She knew of reincarnation but didn't know that she would possibly come back as something that represented her spirit when she died. She just always thought that she would come back as a wolf again.b

Mizu didn't say anything. She really didn't know what to say. The woman disagreed with her thought. She said that something in the world would be upset by her death. This thought made her smile. Would something really be affected by her death? She would be missed? Her lungs seem to open and she could breath again. Still tears flowed from her eyes steadily but she had a small smile on her face. Something would care! She wanted to scream it out. As if to prove to her brother that she would be missed by something. Her brother.. Her lips curled into a small snarl. He had tried to kill her twice. Maybe he provoked her thoughts of killing herself? Maybe... just maybe all this was his fault.

Mizu looked at the hand that was now placed on her shoulder. She smiled. This woman seemed to care. She stood up and turned around. She wiped her face and as she looked at her fingers she saw that some of her dye had been worn away from her tears. She ignored it though and smiled at the woman. She said her instinct was fighting for her survival. No matter what she wanted to do her instinct was not going to let her do it. Mizu didn't know her and she didn't know what the female would do but she embraced her in a hug. She didn't speak but she let herself cry on the woman's shoulder. She pulled away, feeling embarrassed. "Something would really care?"

#00+

[/html]

Alae Sidhe · 04-25-2011, 11:42 AM

[html]

WotD: "Marginalia" 500+

          As wise as the Sidhe's words might have sounded to this woman, they were only used for the real value of comfort and nothing more. There was truly no telling what happened to your soul after anyone died; only the dead knew of such a thing, and they kept tight grasp of that secret of the universe. It was her culture and the passing of her grandmother's beliefs down to her from books of human's time and the scribbled marginalia of these books that seemed to offer some sensible insight as to how this world worked; that made the most sense out of the rest of theology that was out there in the world, and it was the belief that Alae tended to agree with the most. The white veiled woman before her was speechless, and Alae didn't expect her to dive into a religious or spiritual debate with her. It appeared like the woman was taking consideration into Alae's words to her, and the Sidhe would grant her the patience necessary to make sense of them. She still kept her hand on her shoulder while she could, in a tender motion to let her know she was still here behind her, still there to listen.

          In an abrupt motion the woman rose to her height and turned around. Alae could now see the better details of her tear stained facade, and noticed the blue tattoo of swirls around her eyes that mimicked the tattoos of swirls upon her body. The coordinated lovely with her sky blue eyes, in which Alae smiled softly for the fact that her eyes almost nearly matched her own. The Sidhe was suddenly captured into a tight embrace, and her body refused to stiffen. Welcoming the embrace, she returned the gesture, and pet her softly behind her ears as she cried into the nook of her shoulder. It was alright, for tears were a sacred thing to share, and very personal. This was a Luperci's most vulnerable moment, and Alae would be there for this stranger to be the receiver to whatever the young woman wanted to vent.

          Seeing as how the woman didn't exactly realize her sudden actions, she pulled away flustered. She was still questionable whether or not something would actually be affected by her disappearance, and Alae nodded gently, continuing to smile softly. "Of course. We all have a part in this world, no matter how small it may seem. We all make a difference in something or another." Alae spoke. Up until this point, the conversation was vague, and she tilted her head to the side in question. "What seems to be bothering you the most? I can understand if it's too personal to talk about with a stranger. Perhaps I can help you shed some light on something in particular…?" Alae questioned, deciding to take the chance to see what was the exact reason of this woman feeling the way she did.

[/html]

Mizu Kuin · 04-25-2011, 12:12 PM

[html]

When Mizu stood up and faced the woman she seemed to look at her for a few moments. Mizu didn't really focus on anything on the woman. She only looked into her eyes. When Mizu hugged her and the female didn't pull away Mizu was glad. When the hug finally ended Mizu felt a little better. The woman spoke again and Mizu listened carefully. So she had a part in the world, but it just could be small. Mizu did make a difference, that was something she would never forget.

The female asked what was wrong with her. "No no.. it's not to personal." She gave a small smile. Her voice was now only slightly choked up and her breathing came slightly easier. "This uh- may take a while.." She blushed slightly before going into her long story, "Well when I was very young I was really close to my sister. We were inseperable." Mizu smiled at the thought of her dear sister. "My dad died when I was about... two months old. Him and my sister were very close and she grieved lots. It didn't take long for her to pass away as well. My brother Shurui and I hated eachother and he tried to kill me one day. We became slightly closer after that because I visited him everyday where he stayed after he was caught. Then one day I was out on a pack hunt and I got lost. Shurui showed up and I thought he was going to try to help me. But he just chased me away. I think he believed that I would die on my own. So that was the second time he tried to kill me."

She took a deep breath, talking about Shurui wasn't something she normally did. "I traveled for about seven or eight months and that tired me out. I haven't exactly been myself since I arrived here. When I got here though I was stressed and I started drinking and smoking weed. I almost got another wolf and I hurt, even possibly killed when I suggested raiding a pack. The alpha overheard me and I can't really remember what happened after that. After the incident though I quit everything and joined a pack. And now I feel like I don't deserve to be in a pack, or to have a happy life." Tears quivered in her eyes again and one spilled over. But now it seemed her tears had finally run out.

#00+

[/html]

Alae Sidhe · 04-27-2011, 11:28 AM

[html]

300+

Willing to share her sorrows with the Dahlian, Alae was patient as she listened with a keen ear to the pale woman. It was a snapshot of her history, her sister falling peril to death as soon as her father died himself. Alae couldn't imagine how difficult it would be on the heart and soul to lose one's parents, as she remembered her parents to be very nurturing and protective of her and her siblings while growing up; they were her means of exploring and learning about the world. Even her siblings alone, she couldn't imagine growing up without them. Not being judgmental of the woman before her, Alae continued to listen, an ear flickering when she mentioned her very own brother trying to kill his sister. Was it jealousy, something more? It made a pang of half anger, half sadness swell in the Sidhe's heart. For one of your own blood to attempt to kill you was one of the worst judgements anyone could face in death in this world. Her story was compelling, mysterious and interesting, but the Dahlian felt sympathy for her pain this whole time. Nobody, nobody should have been raised like she was.

Bad habits followed with drinking and smoking (though marijuana wasn't as nearly bad to Alae than alcohol was), with a few more recent events to set her outcast from everything else. She was admirable for the fact she was strong and escaped her brother while she could. Alae listened intently until she was finished, and seen the frustration twisted upon her facade. "Nobody's life is perfect, no matter how much you try to make it." The Dahlian began, taking a pause to think about her next words. "Everyone makes mistakes at one point or another, and what's important is if you could move on like they never happened. Everyday is a new day to start over. I must say you are very strong for having to endure so much until now, perhaps it was a good thing in the end Shurui did chase you away so he wouldn't hurt you." Maybe Shurui realized his actions, and sent her away while he was still sane. "You deserve happiness, everyone does. Don't let mistakes hold you back from getting what you deserve." Alae noted. Her past wasn't particularly perfect either, it was filled with faults and mistakes galore, but those faults made her into the Luperci she was today, and was somewhat humble with her own hardships. It made her experienced and more aware of what she really wanted out of this life, and would hope this woman would come to that understanding, too.

Login




Remember me Lost Password?