Soran had been out all morning, she had been hunting with her knife, throwing the knife with a new accuracy that pleased her, she had been practicing for a while and was getting rather good at it. She now had several rabbit corpses, each tied at the ankles with a thin strap of leather, she had hung them over her shoulder and was now walking back to the manor. Long strides took her across the lands quickly, she was still ill at ease within the lands at the moment, the raid and the war bearing a heavy weight upon her mind, she was worried for her children and her granddaughter and indeed for Haven and her great grandchildren in Cour Des Miracles, the truth was that she wished that she could split herself in two to protect them. The ebony Aedile was the matriarch of the family and was now trying to settle into the role, she wanted to look after the whole family, if only they were all together in one pack, it would make it so much easier, at least they were not too far away she supposed, only a short distance across the lands in the grand scheme of things. She just wanted to protect them, she wanted them all to be safe and happy, along with all of her friends within the pack, along with Deuce, the female who made her heart melt whenever she looked at her. She wanted to be the way they had been, back into the mated life that they had been, but there was the issue of Charm, the sable female still felt an attraction for her, but she feared that she liked her for the wrong reasons, she adored the calico patterned female, but her heart was stuck, like a broken record on Deuce, no matter how she tried she could not quash the feelings for the pale female who had once been her mate. The calico girl was still young, she would be able to find someone else, the sable female thought for a while that that could have been her, but alas, her feelings had different plans for her. It was now time for her to confess this to the calico girl, she needed to be honest with her, it would be like pulling a plaster from her fur, she would just get it over with quickly, she did not want to hurt the younger female.

The ebony Aedile walked through the lands quickly, she would go to her room and think about what she would say to her before she went to her, yes, she would plot it all in her mind, she hoped more than anything that the calico patterned female would not be too upset. The female padded up the steps of the house, crossing the porch and walking through the open front door, she visibly relaxed as she stepped inside, the house feeling like the safest part of the whole lands. The dark female went to walk to her room, the rabbits bouncing on her chest and back as she walked down the corridor. Alas, it seemed that fate was once again playing against her plans, there stood the calico girl, in front of her door, she had just tapped on it. The sable female swallowed hard, she had no idea how she would begin this conversation, how she would explain that she could not continue the fleeting romance that they had begun. She padded closer, a weak smile crossing her lips.
Hello Charm. She said, her tone was friendly, but underneath she was quaking with nerves, she did not want to hurt or upset the calico girl but no doubt she would, but she could not bury her head beneath the sand any longer, she was eight years old after all, it was time for the sable matriarch to behave like a grown wolf.

The sable female stared at the younger calico girl, despite her feelings for Deuce she could not, would not deny that her beauty was breath taking, the patterning on her fur was so unusual and exquisite, her eyes the most perfect lilac she had ever seen. Perhaps in another life time, another situation the pair would have been lovers, a pair that were simply meant to be; but for Soran that was Deuce, no matter what happened in their lives the pull of one another always dragged them back together. They had both been mated since they had broken up, they had both had litters of pups, they had both fallen for unsuitable males that had tried to ruin their lives, Soran's ex-mate had even tried to strangle her to death, but somehow, for a reason no-one other than fate could explain, they always found themselves together again, staring into one another's eyes, missing one another with their entire beings, loving one another just as much. It was fate and as much as the ebony Aedile had tried to wrestle with it, to fight it down with logic; after all Deuce had hurt her before in the past, no, she had shattered her heart into thousands of tiny pieces, just as Summer's death had done; no matter how hard she tried, Soran still loved her, wholly and unconditionally, the moment that the pale female had knocked on the sable matriarch's door she had been forgiven. Nothing physical had happened between them, save for a few kisses here and there, Soran had not wanted to hurt Charm further by sleeping with her former mate; little did she know that Charm had found a lover in Anathema, but still she knew that knowing Deuce was so close would mean that she could never be as happy with Charm, she would never be able to give the calico patterned girl the love that she deserved. The Aedile did not want this, she wanted Charm to be happy and without Deuce Soran would not be happy, she would make Charm miserable, of this she was sure, she did not want that for either of them, the calico girl deserved happiness, she deserved a wolf who's heart would solely belong to her, rather than the sable female who would still long for a pair of alabaster former mates that she would never be able to have again. Soran would have, of course, been faithful to Charm, but her heart would have ached and pined for the female with the bi-coloured eyes that slept just in the next room.

The calico girl's face seemed to light up as she saw Soran, this made the coal pelted female's heart begin to pound even harder than it had been in her chest, the guilt bubbling up in her stomach. How could she tell someone who clearly loved her that she did not want her? It was a task that the Aedile wished that she would never have to face, alas here it was staring at her, it was now or never. The dark mother smiled as Charm spoke. She bowed her head.
I am as well as is to be expected, with the current war, Anu is my granddaughter's mother, I am rather concerned about her. How are you? The dark female asked, looking the calico girl over, she was indeed beautiful, it was unfortunate that Soran's heart would only beat for one female and that the very object of years of desire had returned home. The sable female took Charm's hand as it was extended to her, giving it a quick squeeze of affection and then moving away quickly, the younger female confessed to having missed her dark almost-lover and Soran nodded, finally it was time to bite the bullet, as the human phrase went, it was unfair to string Charm along for an unnecessary amount of time. The sable female swallowed before meeting the girl's lilac gaze with her own jade one.
Charm I think we need to have a talk, not out here, let us go into my room. The female spoke, passing the younger girl swiftly and opening her bedroom door, gesturing for the multi patterned female to step inside so that they might speak privately. This was a matter of breaking someone's heart, it was making Soran feel guilty enough, without the idea that she would do it publically, making the calico girl feel betrayed and publically humiliated, no, Soran would do this with the decorum that she could muster, they would speak privately. She just hoped that Charm was not too upset.

This was hard for the sable female, she had never been the one to break anyone's heart, the reject another. Her lovers over the years had always been the ones to break her heart, she had fallen so deeply in love with Summer and she had died, of course this was not the pale female's fault, but it had indeed shattered the fae's heart. Then Hollow had come along, the less thought on him the better, the psychotic red wolf had turned out to be Summer's murderer and as cold and cruel as they came. Deuce had left her, again shattering her heart. And then there had been Akiro, the male had attempted to kill her and Soran had fought back in self defence, ending up killing him. Then of course there had been Dayna, Soran had ended that relationship but it was far from breaking the pale female's heart, they had both known that it was over long before the words had been spoken, there had been no love there for a long time; that, Soran realised, was why Dayna had wanted the pups, she had thought that it would rekindle what they had once had, but that would never have worked and the ebony Aedile felt that they both knew it was for the best when their relationship had ended. Soran had never had to do this before, she had never had to shatter someone's heart, it was clear by Charm's touch on her cheek that she felt deeply for the female, this would make it even harder for the female, this was not going to be a case of "oh well, some things just don't work out." Charm spoke kind words to the dark female and the guilt began to bubble more violently in her stomach and chest, she was such a loving creature and Soran was indeed fond of her, but she did not love her, she knew that now, she did not have the moment of heart stopping joy whenever she saw her, not like she had when she saw Deuce.
Yes, I suppose that you are right, I am sure that she will be fine, but I cannot help but worry about her, I owe her a great debt, she's my friend. The lady replied, her tone sad, partially because she was thinking of Anu and partially because she was being eaten alive with guilt at what was about to come.

The younger female was compliant as they walked into Soran's room, the scene of the crime that had thrown their entire relationship off course, as soon as Deuce had knocked upon the door that the dark dreamer had just opened their fate had been sealed, Soran would always need Deuce, just as she would always miss Summer. Just as a flower always needed the sun. The female's heart sank and Charm pulled the ring from her bag, speaking such a lovely and impassioned speech. At any other time, in another lifetime perhaps, the green eyed lady would now have been almost sobbing with joy, throwing her arms around Charm and kissing her face all over, but alas, it was not the way it was supposed to be, at least not now, not here. The ebony pelted female swallowed hard and closed the door behind the pair. She did not know how to say this, so she decided to be as honest as possible, she wished that there would be a gentler way to say this to the female, but in the matter of breaking a heart there would never be an easy way.
I do not know how to say this Charm. The sable female said, her tone sad still as she turned back to the calico female, who, it seemed just to make Soran feel more guilty somehow, looked more beautiful and happy than she had ever seen her before, she was truly beautiful, but Soran's heart only beat for the female who slept one room over from her.
This is the hardest thing that I have ever had to say to anyone, I cannot be your mate Charm. I am so sorry; I did not mean to get your hopes up. I just, I cannot feel the same way about you as you do for me, I have tried, I have thought on this over and over again, but my heart belongs to another and there is nothing I can do to change that. The lady said, her usually calm nature cracking as her voice filled with guilt and sadness, she hated having to do this to the calico patterned girl, but to be truly happy, to be true to herself, she had to, so that she could be with the pale female that fate always dragged her back to.