it all seems like a dream to me
#1
[html]For Meghann! <3
(379.)

Maggie was going to be a mother. She was going to have puppies with Denver. They were to be a family. The thought rocked against her brain over and over again until she could barely deal with it anymore. The days had passed by slowly, her anticipation getting the better of her. Most days she spent with Denver; he had taken this very seriously and was a dutiful mate, just like he was supposed to be. It made the unexpected twist easier to deal with, especially when nausea gripped her and she was unable to go on rounds or hunt for herself. He was supportive of her, and that knowledge made her able to continue on, despite her fears of motherhood.


This morning she was alone. Maggie had spent the morning in bed playing with Claudia. The kitten was her only source of entertainment lately; they had been inseparable as of late and Maggie’s list of things she could do right now were slim. The kitten lay on top of her owner’s burgeoning belly, batting at one of Maggie’s necklaces that she held in her hand. Maggie’s petite frame had failed to hide the puppy bump after a few short weeks; halfway through her pregnancy now she had gotten used to it. But still, she felt fat and hideous despite the beautiful life that was growing inside her.


The kitten meowed after some time, and used her stomach as a jumping off point, as if she were bored with her owner. The silver Confidant made a small sound of protest at the jump, more at her kitten’s nails than anything else. Maggie sighed, and wrapped her bed pelts around her body. The bright light coming in through the windows teased her and she desperately wanted nothing more than to take a walk. Her body ached and she wasn’t entirely nausea-free, so the thought of getting up seemed impossible. Still, sitting in the house alone without Denver was about the least productive thing she could possibly do.


The dainty optime woman forced herself out into the light, taking a different route than usual. Claudia had followed her out, perhaps to catch a meal, or stay by Maggie’ side. The pregnant wolf walked slowly, for she had nowhere to be or anyone to see.


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#2
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It was fear that had kept her away from her sister since the problems with the supposedly peaceful pack to the north. The gypsy hybrid had kept to herself as much possible, though it seemed she had gone out of her way to avoid her silver counterpart, an unconscious decision on her end. Certainly, it was not that she did not want to see Magnolia, for it was all she had wanted since arriving in this strange, secretive pack. After her sister's capture, though, after they had shared a similar experience... She feared her reaction. Would Maggie feel betrayed?

Taking a deep breath, Foxglove pushed herself forward. She had decided that it was time to stop being a coward. She needed to be close to her sister, to see her and speak with her without a distance between them. Pale feet moved in the direction of her sister's home, taking her there without much conscious thought. he knew where she was going, even if it was going to be difficult. How could she face her sister now, after everything that had happened? Would she be forgiven?

"Maggie," she breathed, catching sight of her sister. It took a moment for the swollen belly to register in her mind, and a questioning expression was returned. "Te vagy terhes?" she asked, approaching her sister, spotting the cat following her.

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#3
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313.

The sound of her dear sister’s voice shook her body like an earthquake; it was the last voice she had expected to hear that day. The silver woman gasped as her sister called out to her, genuinely spooked. Had a ghost spoken to her? Was she hallucinating? Foxglove had hidden herself away since joining Salsola… she did not even come to see her when she had been returned by Ichika. It hurt, almost as much as Denver hurt her, to see her apathetic and uncaring. Maybe there was something going on with her then… but still, why now? Why months later? Had she learned of her pregnancy, and had she come to snoop? She didn't think her sister was that cruel, but still, Maggie questioned her intentions.

Foxglove spoke again and a foreign language fell off her lips. The Confidant narrowed her eyes, but still walked towards her pale sister. She had guessed she was questioning the obvious bump in her belly, but still, Maggie was unfamiliar with whatever dirty gypsy language her sister spoke. “Foxglove,” she said simply, trying her best to not let her chin tremble. She wanted to be stoic, as if she didn’t need her sister’s love. Maggie walked briskly to close the gap between them and wrapped up her sister with her arms, pulling her close and hugging her tightly. “I don’t understand you when you speak like that, you know that,” Maggie whispered into Foxglove’s ear, trying to hide the disdain in her voice, but she was sure some venom slipped out. After a moment she let go of her sister, taking in her appearance. “Long time no see, sister,” She did love Foxglove, and even though they had a complicated past, it meant a lot to see her blonde sister there now, even if it was a few months too late.


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#4
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"I am sorry... I did not live with Mother for much longer than you did, sister," she said softly, "but I suppose I understand why you did not cling to the language that she preferred." The words were spoken without hostility; she knew that their mother had hurt the silver sister, for why else would she have adopted their father's name? Though the story was one filled with misunderstanding, Foxglove was not bothered by the idea that her sister held little love for their mother, for Lolita was not there. It would only harm her if her sister resented her just as much.

Released from her larger sister's grasp, the blonde girl stood nervously, feeling suddenly agitated. The suffocating feelings she had experienced here in this strange, dark kingdom did not seem to bother her sister nearly as much, if at all. After all, there was obvious life growing within her, something that the gypsy girl found strange to believe possible in a place like this. "This is a strange place that you call home," she admitted tentatively. "I feel no more at home here than I have anywhere else... And I fear that you will tire of my presence." The moment the words escaped, she wished she could pull them back; they had not been meant to be spoken aloud.

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#5
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(337.)


“I barely remember mother’s language,” the Confidant admitted sheepishly. “She dumped me at Dad’s door so young that I am even starting to forget what she looks like, these days,” How could Foxglove only ‘suppose’ to understand? Had she forgotten what Lolita had done to her? She was the outcast of the family because of her unfortunate resemblance to their father, or at least that’s how Maggie dealt with the blame of being forgotten. But Maggie did not have any jealousy or anger over Foxglove being one of the preferred children now. It was childish to hold on to such a grudge, and Lolita was no longer around so it didn't really matter.

“I know, it is a strange place,” Maggie tried to look deep into Foxglove’s eyes, willing her sister to believe what she was about to say. “I know it seems crazy, but if you find a trade to keep you busy you will enjoy it here. I became a border scout and I love it. I could see you bringing some of the gypsy tradition here to liven it up a bit, I don't know. Also, I would never tire of your presence, dove, you have no idea how happy I am that you came here. Salsola is a dark place but if you meet the right people it can be truly wonderful,” Maggie failed to mention her complete failure to assimilate into the pack for months on end initially, her puppy mind couldn’t comprehend just quite what this pack was about. But she was over that now and obviously successful here because she had put her mind to it. Perhaps she had become biased, she would be bearing her children to the pack and they would become even more soldiers to the cause. But she didn’t let such an awful thought plague her mind at that present moment. Instead she grinned, and looked down to her belly. “Full of wonderful surprises,” How had she become so lucky?


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#6
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The admission was met with silence; their mother was not a topic they often discussed and truthfully, Foxglove intended to keep it that way. Perhaps one day they would be faced with their demons. Maggie would be forced to come to terms with her thoughts of maternal abandonment, and Foxglove the opposite, her feelings of paternal disinterest. The gypsy hybrid avoided talking about her mother with her sister, but she could not deny the small twang of hurt that she felt. She was so similar to her mother in appearance that she was like a constant reminder, as Maggie was of their father.

"I was a scout in the tribe, but I don't want to do that here. I don't know... If there's anything I can even do here... But I'll have to try to find something." Perhaps she could speak with Szellem soon, to see what he thought of it. She knew he was still wary of this pack, but she hoped he would help her find her place. With her sister now, and her nieces and nephews apparently on the way, she had no intention of leaving.

Jade eyes once more studied the bump of her sister's stomach. "I don't know anyone here... I don't even know if you have a mate," she admitted with a sheepish smile. "But I am glad you're happy here. I want to be happy here, too." For you. This was not the place she would have chosen on her own.

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