He remembered images of what he'd done. A surprising feeling of guilt sent him scurrying back to anathema, back to his mate and their pups. He stayed close, avoiding her searching blue eyes, avoiding their tiny mewls for attention and affection. He knew it, there was a demon inside of him that needed to be pulled out.

The answer came to him in a dream. He was outside of his body, watching as he battled a giant shadow. The battle raged on with both warriors being injured, both warriors taking and giving titanic blows. And then as he watched, he took a blow to the face. He heard his scream of pain as blood gushed from the destroyed eye. Even as his blood pooled under their feet, he watched as the shadow wolf had its jugular ripped out, falling to the ground. Another shadow came forward, lifting an arm, and the warrior shadow vanished.

He woke up, knowing he needed to return, to destroy the shadow that began it all. Not lucifer, not odadio. Azza. He would destroy Azza. He began packing a knapsack with some supplies as he shouted for his woman.

She was taking a nap, enjoying the time that the pups were asleep. They were starting to sleep longer and not needing to nurse as much. They were also starting eat regurgitated meat and hopefully would soon be fully weaned. The owl that she had taken in was doing a lot better and wasn’t as afraid of her and her family. It seemed to realize that Ayasha wasn’t going to eat it and was its source of food and care.

Speaking of pups, Liam didn’t seem upset about her taking in Alaki's pups, not that he knew they were his. The Angelo had made her promise to not tell anyone whose pups they were; just that she was caring for them as a favor for him. But she didn’t have them yet so she wasn’t too worried about it. Her nap was actually rather nice and she woke up rather refreshed and in a good mood.

She heard some noise and then the voice of her mate came to her and she said that she'd be there in a moment, first grabbing the pups who were awake and needed her. She then had one in each arm as she left their bedroom and went into the larger main room. She saw him packing and became a bit worried and curious. "Liam? What's going on?" She wondered if he was going somewhere and where he was going and how long he'd be gone.

She came in and he looked to her . "I know how to fix it, Kiddo. I can fix it I can make the shadow wolves and the butterflies go away. I have to go... " He halted, watching her. His gaze dropped to the pups she held, then rose back to her. . "I have to go, Kiddo. I don't know how long I'll be gone though. "

He bit his lip then crossed to her. He wanted to hold her before he left. . "I'll come home to you kiddo. I really will. " He studied her face, especially her eyes. He was sure she would be upset with him, their pups were only a few weeks old. Not only that but she had taken on another litter of pups too. He gazed at her, his golden eyes both troubled and calm, somehow manic in their excited and anxious glittering. I can make everything right kiddo I can.

OOC: Let's hope that Liam doesn't get too angry with her about the stillborn >.>

IC: As soon as her mate started to talk, Ayasha knew that there was something wrong, that he was leaving. He could get better by going away? Was that too much to hope for and believe? Her eyes grew almost sad. "Where are you going?" She was desperately curious and yet also desperate to keep him from leaving. Though she knew him well enough that she knew that he would still go.

He promised that he would come back and she nodded numbly. She believed that he believed it but there were all sorts of things that could go wrong. But she could offer him something to help. "Why don't you take Ahuli? He'll get you there much faster than walking and I won't need him for a while. Plus, he likes you." He knew his mistress's love and whom she trusted.

Then his leaving brought something up that she was dreading. She wasn’t sure how to tell him or what his reaction to her telling would be but she had to. "Liam, there is something I need to tell you. The stillborn, it was black. I didn’t want to tell you right away because I was sure you would blame me and I was afraid of your reaction to the news. I hope you're not mad at me for not telling you." She was crying but not really hard. She really was sorry about not telling him but was worried both about him and her.

He listened to her, then spoke. "I've told you about Catalyst. I'm going back there. But I swear, I will come back to you. I will." Now, despite the pups she was holding, he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. "Thank you, my love. I will be sure to return Ahuli safely to you."

As she spoke again about the stillborn, the unnamed one, the genderless one, his heart hardened. Not against his pale angel, no, but against her tears. He had unconsciously been considering staying, been considering just letting it go. And yet news of the shadow that had sprouted in her womb had reminded him why he needed to go back to Catalyst.

He stroked her cheek gently with his thumb. "Love, I don't blame you for it. You are pure, innocent of evil. I'm going back to destroy the evil that tried to ruin everything for me, that even now throws a taint over our life. When I come back to you everything will be peaceful again, everything will be good, and no harm will befall you or the pups. I can't promise you that right now, I can't promise you nothing will happen to you three. The evil that killed my mother and sister has to be destroyed first."

He paused, then spoke. "Promise me, love, that you won't follow me. I won't lose you to Azza."

Ayasha could vaguely remember him mentioning a placed called Catalyst and nodded when he kind of asked her. Liam swore again that he would return to her and wrapped his arms around her, minding the pups, and she buried her head against him the best she could. She inhaled his scent, memorizing it. The pups seemed to realize that something was going on since they tried to get their father to hold them. But he did accept the use of her horse and that he would bring him back.

Her confession of the pup being black went fairly well. He was upset but not at her, as his words soon proved. He explained that everything would be good when he left, that he was going to destroy evil. She nodded, wanting to believe what he told her. At not following him though, she hesitated. She wanted to be with him but knew that it wouldn’t be safe for her or the pups. Maybe if the pups weren’t born or were much older, she would have gone. But not when they were so small. So she nodded and reached up and gave him a gentle kiss. "I won't follow you. Just come home safe, Liam. And I'll introduce you to the new pups when you get back, OK?" She gave him another kiss.

He could feel her indecision, but the maternal instincts he knew she had won out over wanting to be with him. He was relieved, he didn't know if he'd have been strong enough to protect her from Azza. Hell, he didn't even know if he was strong enough to go on if she was killed in the heat of battle. He drew in a deep breath, memorizing her scent. He drank deeply of the love that was present in her tender kiss. After a moment, he pulled back, but only long enough to pull D'Ryn from her arms and hold the boy close to him. "You're little now, son, but you are the alpha male of the den while I'm gone. Take care of your mom and sister. I will come back to teach you everything I know. Grow big and strong." He nuzzled into his son, feeling the little male licking his cheek.

After a moment he gently set the boy on the floor, pulling Bridget to him. "You are going to be a beautiful warrior just like your mom, Bridget. Don't grow up too quick...I'll be back before you know it."

His throat was tight, his face impassive as he turned to his mate and pulled her close, burying his face in her hair. He could feel her tears on his chest, and he closed his eyes. "Know this, Ayasha, I will love you for all of eternity. I will hurry home... wait for me."

He kissed her deeply, his love driving him to hold her tightly. He rested his forehead against hers, simply staring into her eyes for what seemed like an hour, though was only mere seconds. He pulled away, his throat tighter as he grabbed his pack and walked out without looking back.

It wasn't long before he had mounted Ahuli and was galloping away.

She desperately wished that she could go with him and make sure that he didn’t do anything idiotic and die on her. Instead she would have to rely on his ability to survive and live on the hope that he'd be OK. He would likely miss their pups first words and also miss seeing the bird that he had helped rescue get better. he would be kissing out on so much of their lives. She only hoped that it would be worth it.

He wanted to speak to their pups and he first talked to his son, and Ayasha watched as the boy licked his father on the cheek. Liam then put D'ryn down and then took Bridget into his arms and talked to her as well. She had tears falling down her face as he put their daughter down and turned to her. They clung to each other and he reminded her that he loved her and asked that she wait for him. She nodded to both, not trusting her voice to be steady or even there.

He then pulled away and left, leaving her feeling a bit empty. But she took care of her pups and when they were finally asleep, she allowed herself to sob and soon fell asleep, dreaming of when her mate would be back and they could be together once more, forever this time.