329



Cambria sat in her room, Enzo sitting in her cupped hands as her thoughts flew all over the place. If possible, the meeting the other day had only gotten her thinking about the fiery haired woman she had met in the city more. War scared her, even if it did not involve her home. It did involve people that she loved and cared about. Conor, her cousin, Alexey, and Lolita. She still didn't know exactly how she felt about the woman, but she knew she felt something. The young Marino was not only confused about that, but she was confused about what had happened that night. It had felt good, beyond good really, there was no denying that. But was it normal for two girls to be together? It seemed that it was was the norm for it to be a boy and a girl together. Was there something wrong with her? Would people think she was weird? She wished she had someone to talk to about this, but who? Who could she feel comfortable asking about this? She felt stuck, like she would suffocate under the weight of all this if she couldn't find someone to confide in.



One hand moved to stroke the back of the dove's head. "You wanna try flying again Enzo?" It seemed as if his wing had healed, though since he had been stationary and grounded for so long it would take a little work until he could really fly again. Gently she threw him up in the air and his wings stretched out and flapped, taking flight for a few seconds before he had to return to the floor. The slender wolfess stood up and walked over to retrieve him, placing her hand out for him to hop up on. Cambria straightened back up bringing her nose close in a loving gesture to the bird. "You're getting better. It'll just take some time, yeah?" Now if only she could start getting better.

well... hello

Border patrols were up, visitor down and Anu was trying her hardest to stay close to the Manor. She and Savina were doing their best to keep the pack safe, and watch for anything might find the stresses of war unbearable and sought their pack lands for comfort. The female found the urge to seek out Alexey, and tell her herself that she was welcomed with Crimson Dreams, almost unbearable, but even the single meeting had shown Anu the honey colored female’s strength. She had family that she was not about to leave. Yet Anu remained close to home, and it of course was far from completely uncomfortable. The lean silver and sand fey entered the Manor after a brief stalk around the grounds; mind focused on the tasks that would busy her enough to keep her mind from becoming idle. She had to speak with Mati, though as she knocked on the door, and then opened it as her motherly right allowed, Anu did not find her daughter present.

The Lt. General turned to the stairs, and let a long and needed sigh exhaled from her mouth. She walked up them slowly, now too tired to try and find Mati for the not so important story she wished to tell. Anu wandered down the hall, stopping at the door to her own room and looking in it. The bed was neatly made, and since Anu was not the sort to make it she knew that Colibri was out and around the territory. Secretly she wished Coli was not far, but dismissed the worry and only blamed the stress thoughts of war brought her.

The blue eyed woman turned and walked down the hall once more, finding it was not just her paw steps that she heard. A finger went to the fly-away stands of strait mane, tucking it back behind an ear while she noticed that at least one of the Manor’s rooms was not empty. Cambia’s voice struck her attention and her deep earthen tone in the doorway caught her eye. Anu stopped to knock politely on the ajar door, a soft smile on her face she waited to be acknowledged. If the young female were busy then Anu would understand, but she hoped to at least say ‘hi’.

300+

426



The only other topic that the girl had ever avoided in such an adamant manner was discussing what had happened to her with the drugs. Still though, this time it was different. Mentioning her accident sent the girl into a slight panic attack and her emotions bounced all over the place, leaving her in shambles until she was able to piece herself back together. With this though, she was worried about being judged. Always the slender youth had worried that there was something different about her, something that wasn't right. While she didn't think that her parents would ever stop loving her for any reason, opening up to them about this frightened her. She didn't know how they would react and it worried her. As much as she wanted guidance, she was more afraid of having her fears confirmed. Even if they were okay with it, would they ask a lot of questions about what had happened? Cambria really didn't want to go into the details of what had transpired between her and Lolita. It was highly personal, and she didn't think she could share it with anyone else. It would be far too embarrassing to speak of.



Her attention had been so focused upon Enzo that the knock on her door made her jump slightly. The mourning dove flapped his wings with her sudden jerk, but when she looked to see who it was she instantly calmed. It was just Anu. The girl offered the Lt. General a small smile. "Hi Anu. You can come in, if you want." Cambria turned to return Enzo to his nest, that was enough exercise for him for now and it'd be good for him to rest up a bit after being startled. As she did this something came to her. Recently she had seen Anu with another female and they had seemed close, and not just as friends. Apprehension coiled inside her as she thought of discussing what was bothering her with the tawny older woman. Still, if what she had seen had been correct, then it seemed that she would be the least likely to judge her for what she was feeling and thinking.



Standing back up and turning around to face her mother's friend her fingers fidgeted nervously at her sides. "Anu, could I...talk to you about something? And could you close my door?" The last thing she wanted was anyone dropping in on this conversation. Cambria needed this to remain private. She chewed on her lip, hoping she wasn't about to make a huge mistake.

short ><

Since her own had grown, and two left the nest, Anu had always thought of Savina and Kansas’s pups as an extension of her adopted brood. Though she loved all the pups that lived in the pack her relationship with Savina had made her something like an aunt to the three. When Cambria had been hurt she had felt the same sort of emotions her mother had, though perhaps just a different degree of that same sadness and fear. Her own daughter was off in some far off place and that in addition to the general motherly love she felt for the young girl made Anu all the more eager to check on her and see what she might be up to.

Anu looked at the bird, not having known that she was keeping it Anu found it quite a change from the caterpillar that she had kept before. No doubt Cambria was caring for the dove as she had the insect, and the woman watched as she calmed the bird. The Lt. General took a step back, giving the pair space as she had surprised them both. At the invitation she walked through the door and commented,
“I didn’t know you had a roommate.” Eye drifted around the room, curious to know what other creatures she might be hiding, her face wearing a soft and warm smile.

Blue eyes landed on the girl, and she noticed that she was unlike her normal friendly self. Finding her anxious Anu let her face turn concerned. She spoke, and Anu nodded in response and then turned to close the door behind her. It clicked, and the female turned to face Cambria once more.
“Sure, is everything okay?” She attempted to keep her tone calm and even, not wanting to heighten any stress the Marino girl might be in.

300+

Naaaah! 300+



Anu had always been there for her, ever since she could remember, and she was always thankful for that. There weren't many things that she didn't feel comfortable talking with her parents about, but this was one of them and in this situation she was glad to have someone like Anu as a sounding board. Cambria knew it wasn't healthy for her to keep this all bottled up inside but she had been too afraid to talk to anyone about what had happened and what the implications for her lifestyle were. She had never seen any couple that wasn't made up of a male and a female. The idea that she was attracted to other females was somewhat frightening, fearing that it was not accepted and looked down upon. She still wasn't sure if what she saw between Anu and the other woman was true, but at least she had this opportunity to find out if she was the only one that had these feelings.



"I found him a few months ago, his wing was broken. I've been taking care of him since then. He's finally healed, but he can't fly for very long yet. I named him Enzo." The girl didn't like referring to anything as an "it" and so she had named the mourning dove just as she had named Leafy. If you cared for something you gave them a name. It only seemed proper to her. Her parents had given her and her siblings names. Cambria knew that this was nothing like the bond that existed between parents and children, but still it would be rude to not give her various charges a name. It felt much more natural to refer to them in such a way.



The girl could see the concern turn the Lt. General's features and she hated to make someone worry. Still, she herself was worried and so she could not do anything to abate the older woman's concerns. As Anu closed the door she moved to go sit on her bed and then looked back up to the tawny female, a silent invitation for her to join her on the mattress. Hands folded in her lap, but her fingers continued to fumble nervously. "I...I don't know..." she said lamely, her gaze turning to her own hands. A few moments of silence passed before she spoke up again. "Anu, are you and that other lady...are you a couple?" Cambi hoped that she wasn't prying into the other's life, but she had to ask that question first before she spoke from her heart.

<33

Blue eyed looked at the cream and tan dove. Now that he was passed the startle that she had provoked his seemed quite tamed. Her eyes could not see the differences in the wings, as Cambria explained. But, perhaps she wouldn't. The Horticulturist knew little of healing anything other then a wilting flower, and so she left that to those that were knowledgeable. The pack was in need of someone that knew what the healing art entailed, and the thought that Cambria might grow into that position pleased the Lt. General. It took a special personality and mind set to give those that loving care when they needed it most. Anu found that the brown female fit the mold nicely. “He looks quite happy in your care.” Anu added, turning to see the female sitting on her bed.

The older fey moved to sit beside her, looking first at her own paws and then the face of the Marino child. She could not have guess where the conversation would be headed, and Anu was worried that something had happened to the young girl. It was not a safe time to be outside the borders, and she understood that every wolf must wander. Her worry was not stifled as she spoke, but the question was a sort of relief. She had worried that the infinite of horrid things that could possibly happened had. And with the question she hadn't revealed any of those things.

Anu breathed softly, and though she was relieved she did not find complete comfort in answering. There was no reason to be unsure, for Anu knew the answer. “Colibri?” She asked, knowing all to well that there was no one else that Cambria could be questioning. It was how to form it as to not confuse Cambria that took the moment a silence to answer. “Yes, we are.” the simplistic words came with a smile. Anu could not help but smile at the thought of the younger woman, even if someone was in question of their bond. Of course, Cambria’s question was an easy one. It was okay to wonder, for Anu wondered herself what sort of relationship they might be in, it wasn’t always clear as crystal.

<333 300+



She had done all she could to care for Enzo, just as she had done all she could to care for Leafy. This time though, she hoped that he would stay instead of flying away from her. The young wolf would never do anything to keep the dove here if it didn't want to stay, but she hoped that he liked her like she liked him and that he might want to stick around and be her friend. "Thank you, I hope he is. It'd be nice if he wanted to stay with me instead of going away when he's all better." Anu had been the one to ask her if she would let Leafy go free once he turned into a butterfly and she had told her yes. She had let him go. Cambria would do the same with Enzo, if he wanted, but hopefully this time around she wouldn't be stuck behind after her services were no longer required.



It wasn't like her to be so roundabout when wanting to talk over something with someone. Anu probably knew this and most likely wondered why Cambria was going about this in the way she was. Still, this was the only way she was going to feel comfortable talking about what had happened and the feeling it had awakened in her. She needed to know that she wasn't alone in this. Well, clearly there was Lolita, but she needed someone different to talk to. Someone who really knew her and would keep their conversation in their confidence. Even if it were okay to feel the things that she felt, she didn't want everyone to know. Even if Anu was accepting, that didn't mean that others necessarily would be. Even if it were okay, it clearly wasn't the norm and she didn't want to be singled out as weird or different.



Cambi didn't know what the other lady's name was, but she assumed that the name given belonged to the one she was talking about. Her head slightly nodded, helping to confirm that this was indeed the subject she wanted to be on. There was silence, and she started to fear that she had crossed some line in asking the older wolf such a question, but finally she said that they were in fact a couple. A little bit of relief filled her, but she was still nervous. "So...it's okay? For girls to...like other girls?" Her cheeks burned hot from embarrassment and she almost wished that she hadn't asked Anu to talk at all. This was all so awkward. Still, who else was she going to talk with about this? If anyone would help her through this it was the Lt. General.

<3333

Anu was lucky that she had a passion for things that were rooted to the ground. It was hard for them to get up and leave. Unfortunately it was quite easy for them to wilt and die, or simply not grow at all. There were also silent, and if she was not looking for someone to listen it was difficult to be the only one talking. Anu felt for Cambria, knowing how she must have felt giving up her butterfly. It was so easy to get attached to something that you had raised and tended to. Loosing it was almost as hard as loosing a family member. Anu did not know how birds took to caging and taming, and for the young wolfess she hoped that the dove became content in his new home.
“You never know, he could enjoy pack life just as we do.” The female spoke with a smile.

The turn of the conversation resulted in a turn in her expression. She was unsure how to explain her choice of relationships to anyone, and telling Cambria about it was even harder. It had been years and years since Anu realized that she found that attraction and attachment to females. It was emotional and it was physical, and the older female was finding that she still didn’t have it all figured out yet. No matter how long she lived, she wouldn’t fully understand it. Her own pups had known life with multible mothers as normal, but Cambria had not been brought up that way. She was not surprised that she might have questions, knowing that her own face was stuck in a love-struck gaze when ever in the presence of Coli. It was obvious that something was going on between the two. Anu had been expecting a few questions.

But she was happy to try to explain, and though there might be some hesitation Anu was not ashamed nor did she shy away from it. She only wished to make it understandable to the girl. Watching Cambi’s face Anu noticed that the brown hued girl was uncomfortable enough. Anu nodded herself, answering with a simple,
“Yes. Its just as okay as a male with a female or two males liking each other. “ her voice was light, her shoulders shrugging slightly in casual expression. There was nothing odd about it, though it might seem odd to some who were not used to the idea and not open-minded. But it as more common then many might think. Anu added with her normal soft tone,
“You should be with someone that you love, and that loves and treats you right.” It was never that simple, but for the moment there were enough complications. Blue eyes looked at the younger female’s face, wondering if all the angst came from just seeing she and Coli. Or if it was something else.

300+



Cambria wasn't looking for an explanation of Anu's relationship or even really why she was with another female. What she was looking for was any kind of confirmation that the feelings that she had were not unnatural as she feared they might be. She had never seen two females together, or two males, the only romantic relationships that she had been exposed to up to this point had been between males and females and having no other experiences to draw on she could not find the answers she wanted for herself. When she had remembered seeing Anu with the other woman though, it had given her hope. The tawny wolf wasn't an outcast, she was one of the leaders of the pack and her mother's best friend. If it were okay for her to have those feelings for other women then hopefully it would be okay for her as well. If her parents and pack accepted Anu and her preferences then she wouldn't be so afraid to tell her family about the direction her attractions swayed. That was what she was looking for. She needed to know that she wouldn't be shunned for the way she felt. Chances were she would still keep such information mostly to herself, but knowing it was okay would settle the argument that raged within the young wolf.



As the more experienced femme spoke once again the relief she had been hoping for washed over her and her shoulders eased in their tension. Oceanic gaze finally rose back to look at Anu, almost as if to make sure that what her ears had heard hadn't been some sort of illusion. The Lt. General was serious in her words though, to her at least, there was nothing wrong with two females wanting to be together. Not even two males, which was another relationship that the girl hadn't considered. It made sense though. If she, as a girl, could like other girls then boys could like other boys. Relieved as Cambi was to hear this, the searching blue eyes once again made her nervous. Now was the time to confess her secret and even with this reassurance the words did not come easy and her voice seemed to stick in her throat. Her mouth opened to speak unsuccessfully several times before her eyes fell back to her lap and her fidgeting fingers. Then finally, very softly, her voice came forth. "I...I think that...that I like other girls...too..." The Marino's gaze stayed downcast, even now worrying if Anu would react to the news in some unfavorable manner.

Curiosity brought on many questions. Anu was plagued with a persistent curiosity, the sort that kills felines and makes her wander about many things that she would be better off keep her nose out of. She could understand that the Marino child was interested in knowing that her relationship was just as normal as any other. She and Coli had their up and downs, their moments of unease as well as their moments of joy. How they had come to know each other was a tale for the story books, and how they finally come to be together was only sort of epic. But, the simple fact that they were two females could bring question to anyone unknowing, but her curiosity would not rest there, and as Anu listened to the hesitant and unsure words that the younger female spoke she could only wonder more.

Anu hid any surprise. Though she was not expecting this, she had thought it. A small voice in the back of her mind had said that the sight of her and Colibri was not the only thing bringing this question forward. But Anu had not assumed that Cambria was feeling similar feelings towards her own gender. The woman kept her gaze soft, knowing the confusion and knowing how jumbled inside the youth must be feeling. Where she might be shocked, confused herself Anu was proud. It was an odd feeling, for her first instance of surprise was wash away with knowing. The Lt. General had been in her place, she had known that she was different when she met her first mate, and had not know what to do with the knew realization.

The Dreamer placed her light hued hand on that of the younger fey.
“Its okay.” She assured Cambria, knowing that it would be. Her voice was soft, and filled with parental understanding,
“Why do you think you feel this way?” There was nothing critical in the question. Cambi was unsure, she didn’t know if she liked females in the same way Anu did. It was okay to question how she felt, for such a change from what she thought was normal and what Cambria might have expected for herself was more confusing then the mere idea of two woman together. Anu only hoped to bring the feelings forward, untwist the confusion or the insecurity that the brown female was holding inside.

500+



After the words left her lips she almost wished that she could reel them back in and forget that they had ever been said. There was no taking it back though, it was out now and there was nothing she could do to bring her secret back so that she was the only one who knew it. It did feel good, to get it out in the open though. To know that it wasn't a burden that she carried solely on her own. Still, her feelings of hesitance and nervousness reined for now and the relief she felt as minuscule compared to that. The silence that followed her admission was torture and seemed to stretch on for days. The girl couldn't bare to make her gaze rise to meet the older woman's, too afraid of what she might see there. She actually clamped her orbs shut, wanting to block out the world and all the confusion that surrounded her and permeated her very being. Already the adolescent was going through so many changes and this only seemed to be making things more difficult.



If she hadn't remembered Anu was there the light touch would have made her jump, but instead it filled her with a sense of warmth that was amplified with the words, it's okay. It was okay? It truly was? Slowly her eyes reopened and looked sheepishly back up at Anu, searching for the truth that she so desperately needed. There was no deception in that kind face though, and there never had been. Cambria didn't think there ever would be. The warmth was quickly turned up past the point of simple reassurance though when the question she knew had been coming was given voice. Cheeks burned red underneath her dark fur and her gaze averted again. She didn't know if she really wanted to talk about it, but Anu couldn't help her if she didn't know what was going on. So with a deep breath the young girl tried to think of the best (and least embarrassing) way to relay her experience.



"I went to the city, to find some books on herbs, and when I was in the library this scary man showed up. He was mean, and very frightening, and when I got the chance I ran away as fast as I could. I was so scared and I was crying and wasn't really thinking about where I was going. I ran into a building and bumped into a girl. I thought she would be mad at me for running into her, but she was really nice and just wanted to comfort me and make me feel better." If possible, her face got even hotter. "Well, she did make me feel better. I...don't know what it's called, what she did. But she touched me...in some places. It felt good, and I liked it." Cambria swallowed nervously, hoping that was as much detail as she needed to give. "I know if it had been a boy, it would have been different, and I don't think I would've liked it like I did. I feel more comfortable around girls than I do boys, most of the time."

... i wish this was better. ;.;

The older female hoped dearly that Cambria did not hold her question as one of judgment. Anu had no right to judge anyone, not with her history and especially in this sort of situation. It was only to delve deeper into the mind of the confused youngster, to truly understand where it was that these feelings came from. Even when her sea foam eyes moved away in obvious embarrassment Anu did not look away, nor did she retreat her soft touch but pressed slightly harder, reminding that she was still here and still accepting what ever she might say. She knew that there could not be something awfully wrong with what Cambria might say, though her worry that something horrible had happened to the little female was still in the back of her mind. There was trouble in her expression, but Anu waited until the words came forward.

Her first few sentences made the Lt. General’s mind go blank, though thankfully her hand, posture nor face followed suit in reaction. Remaining calm, Anu listened with the fear that something terrible had indeed happened to the soft toned fey. She felt h her thoughts flood back when she explained that she had ran away successfully, and Anu fought to catch up. She listened intensely, though she tried to look on with the same soft understanding. The woman nodded, slowly as she took in the story. Understanding now exactly what Cambria had experienced she first put one fact before all others. It wasn’t easy to talk about such things, especially when they were so confusing and caused the level of embarrassment Cambria was feeling. The most important thing Anu could do was show that what had happened was nothing to be ashamed of, and that she was quite courageous in seeking out explanations.

Anu nodded, the smile she wore softly curved and her eyes filled with that support she hoped to give Cambi. It was certainly a reason for her to believe that she had an attraction to females. For Anu it had come a bit later in life, and as she looked at the young wolfess Anu felt that her age was a hard time to come into such a realization. Perhaps if she had a more confidant personality and a bit older she would be able to understand what sex was between any two creatures? There was a moment of silence, and Anu knew that any more would only hurt,
“Its easy to get confused,” Anu begun, laying down the foundation for Cambria’s comfort.
“to not know what to do or who to talk to about it. But you can always come and talk to me, and I’m glad that you did.” The woman was beginning to ramble and before it became obvious she fought to find the words and tie them in as seamlessly as she could.
“A female is generally more gentle, and it sounds like you met someone very nice. It natural to react like that, when touched like that and in a caring way.” Anu prayed that she spoke words that helped, though she knew them to be honest.

It is lovely! <333 300+



If it hadn't been for the constant presence of the Lt. General's comforting hand Cambria wasn't sure if she would have been able to say all that she did. It was a hard thing to speak of for many reasons. For one, she didn't really know what it was that had happened between her and Lolita. It was still mostly a mystery to the slight youth. Another thing was despite not knowing what had taken place exactly, she knew it was clearly not something people openly talked of often or she would know what it was that had occurred. Lastly was the incredibly private and profound nature of the event. There was the distinct impression on her that what had transpired had been something very personal and very unique and sharing such an experience with someone made you feel entirely exposed and naked in front of them. Also it was difficult to put into words all the feelings and emotions that had flooded her during Lolita's gentle and arousing caresses.



Once again the silence stretched on for a moment and she became nervous of being judged, but Anu's light voice chimed in at just the right moment to quell those concerns. Her gaze traveled once again to the kind and understanding face and in that moment she was so thankful for the older woman. What would she have done if she hadn't had Anu to confide in and talk to? Cambria didn't want to consider that troubling alternative. "You...you don't think my parents will be upset, will they?" She couldn't imagine anything that would divert her mother and father's love from her, but she needed to ask. She needed to be sure that this wouldn't change anything as far as those relationships went. To think that this would cause a rift between she and her parents was enough to break the girl's heart. No, she simply couldn't stand such a thing.



"She was very nice." Cambria definitely liked Lolita, but she didn't think she liked her in the same way that couples liked one another. The creamy woman seemed ethereal to her, and beyond her plane of existence. She would never regret what had happened between them, but she already seemed to know that such a thing would never happen between them again. It had been a singular event, but somehow that didn't bother her as she knew it would if she liked Lolita in the way that lovers did. "That's...not something you do with just anyone though, is it?" The young wolfess wasn't sure of this, but she had an inkling. The experience seemed too intense and powerful to share with just anyone.

your too sweet!

For Anu this was a moment that she would not forget, as she was sure that Cambria would remember too. It had been a enormous discovery in her own life, but she had her mate to share it with and to guide her through the understandings of it. Cambria didn't have that, but she had Anu and could tell her anything without judgment. What she said next made the elder shake her head, “No, your parents love you. I know that they will understand, and want you to be happy”. Savina had always loved her children, and Anu was sure she had loved them before their birth, and even when they were just a notion in her imagination. The Commander had always accepted Anu, her choices and now her relationship with Colibri. Kansas was just as loving as his mate, and there was no doubt in her mind that Cambria’s parents would not be anything but happy when she found someone that she loved and that loved her, no matter if it was a male or a female.

Anu felt her smile grow slightly as Cambi commented on the female that she had met. She wondered whom she was, where she was from. The Lt. General felt a small tinge of protectiveness when it came to the youth of the pack, especially her own pups and those of Savina’s. Though she did not believe that Cambria had been taken advantage of, she still felt her young and held a motherly attitude when it came to such things. Her features did not change to show her small bout of curiosity and protectiveness. What had happened between the unnamed woman and Cambria was something that was private, and Anu would not push to know the details being quite happy to stay in the dark about those bits of information. As long as Cambria was growing to understand her feelings, and the woman hadn’t been forceful Anu would simply answer any questions that came about. As she did the one Cambria asked next.

“No.” She answered, her voice still soft and her expression as accepting as always. “It’s something that you should share with someone that you love, and care about very much. It is a way to express the love you share, a way to connect physically.” she explained.

naaaaah :3 500+



Anu was right in guessing that this would not be a conversation or revelation that Cambria would ever forget. Something like this was life changing and unexpected. The girl had always just assumed or hoped that some day some boy would take an interest in her and they would fall in love and he would take care of her just as her father took care of her mother. To her that had always seemed to be the natural order of things, if you were lucky. With the realization that she was attracted to women instead of men that whole concept in her head had fallen apart and she was left feeling lost and confused. If the other woman wasn't there to help make her understand she wasn't sure what she would have done. Even if she hadn't thought that her parents would stop loving her, hearing Anu confirm that belief helped to calm the uneasiness in her stomach. "I thought so. I didn't think that they'd be mad really, I just needed to hear it, you know?" she said looking into those wise blue orbs. Surely she would understand the need to hear aloud what you knew in your heart to make it true. At least when it came to such delicate and unsure situations.



It was a relief that Anu didn't question her further about who the woman she had been with was. She could understand it if she had, but this was hard enough to talk about without having to go into too many details. Beside, Cambria really wouldn't have been able to tell her that much about Lolita even if she had wanted to. She knew her name, what she looked like, and where she lived from her scent, but those were the only concrete details that she had. She knew that she was gentle and caring, and that she had inadvertently become a major figure in the young girl's life. A part of Cambi still viewed her as a sort of angel, or heavenly figure. Logically she knew this wasn't true, but the feeling of it being that way was still there and she could not shake it. Even if she could she didn't think she really wanted to.



At the answer the young Marino nodded her head, taking the information in and absorbing it. She had started to feel that such a thing might be the case, but she hadn't known. She felt a little bad, that her first experience in this realm of life had not been with someone she loved in that way, but it would do no good to dwell on that. Even if she and Lolita were not in love, the pale woman had taken care of her in a time of need and she couldn't be upset about that. "I hope I can find someone that I can share it with like that. She was nice, but I do not think that we're meant to be together in that way." Cambria had a feeling that most of the time women were attracted to men and not other women. That was probably why she hadn't known about it until all of this. The girl couldn't help but question the notion that there was someone out there for her.

you know its true!

Life was not always black and white, the grays as vibrant and different in shades as those mixed in her pelt. It was not always right or wrong, many situations thick with circumstance choices of a moment, whims. Good and bad were not just as blatant as their definition were written, but a mixture that could bee so muddled that the result showed so sign of one or the other. How was this different? How could there always be a single result of an emotion so grand and so complicated as love was? How could they all be destined for the same avenue? Anu found it impossible to not allow the gray, allow that shade that gave way to the circumstance and chance that love could be found in something other then the expected. She did not believe that it was a side that Cambria now played along; it was not a defining factor that was worn on her pelt. It was just another portion of the whole, a bit that could be placed along the rest of her wonderful kindhearted traits.

“You should tell them.” She spoke those words with a soft tone, not sure how willing she would be to confess this secret.
“When you’re ready, you should tell them.” That day might not be today, it might not be until Cambria found another to spend her life with. Or just when she was certain and confident in her feelings. No matter when, it was important that they know.

It was true that Anu was not one to run around, not allowing herself a moment of vulnerability without trusting who she was with. So much time had been spent between the moment she and Coli had met to when they had shared a physical connection. Yes, there were moments were Anu had been reckless with her heart. But those were rare, and she had felt the pain of those decisions. Anu would be devastated if Cambria was hurt in such a way. Her tone and words made it sound like it would be a search that would take her entire lifetime. Though Anu could not predict the future, she did not (would not!) believe that Cambi would not be able to find someone that would love her eternally.
“I am sure you will. You might be surprised by who it is. Coli had never been with anyone, and I don’t think she ever thought it would be me.” Anu admitted. Of course her beloved had not told Anu that she had been looking for something else, something like a male.

<333 300+



She knew the next words Anu would speak before the kind Lt. General's voice even gave life to them. This was something that could not be kept from her parents, and should not be. It wouldn't change their love for her. Still, though, she didn't think she was quite ready yet to divulge this information to her mother and father. She loved them and trusted them more than anyone, but she was still wrapping her mind around this whole thing. There were still so many questions and unknowns and Cambria didn't want to talk about it with anyone else until she had a better grasp of it herself. Maybe her parents could help her get a better grasp, but the girl had a feeling that this was one of those things she had to kind of figure out on her own to a certain extent. "I know, and I will. I don't know when, but I will," she assured the older fey. The girl would do her best to try and tell her parents before she started to like someone, she figured that would give her plenty of time. Little did she know how unpredictable the world of attraction was and how quickly it could bloom and develop.



Even before this revelation Cambria hadn't been sure if she would find someone to love her. Self confidence and self image were things that the young wolf constantly struggled with and had to fight hard to see the worth in herself. Around certain people those feelings of inadequacy went away, such as her mother and father, siblings, and other individuals she was very close to (Anu being one of them). Still, she felt it hard to believe that anyone she didn't know that well would be attracted to her. She was meek and timid, and confidence was much more attractive than those traits. It would have been hard enough to attract a man, and now she had to hope to attract a woman who had the same preferences as she did. It seem altogether an exceedingly difficult task with a low chance of success. The older female's words did give her a glimmer of hope though. "Really? Well, I hope I'm lucky, like you and she were." Confidence was still lacking, as always, but there was the hope that luck could help her. Cambria couldn't help but try to picture whoever it would be in her mind. The picture was blurry though, and really only the clear thing was the feminine form. How long would it be, she wondered, until that image became clear?

we can end here if you'd like :3

The gray and tan Lt General had never needed to face her birth family with the truth of who she was. She had left them before the fact was risen inside, and before her true desire to find love came to life. She would have no shame in speaking to them about it, but those were the pictures of her parents, her brother as she remembered then years ago. Now, she didn’t know them just as they would know little of her. It was a harsh reality that her own kin would not recognize her, but Anu was not lacking in family or friends. Her birth pack had been replaced, and Anu would never return.

She nodded slightly, glad that Cambria would tell her mother and father. It was not something that needed to be spoken, not now anyways. The young girl was still unsure about her feelings and confused. When confidence and assurance came to her Cambria would find it almost impossible not to speak of it.

Anu knew all to well the insecurity and the fear of never finding love. At times it seemed like such a distant fantasy, something that could not be reached by one so mortal as she. Then another moment it was simply there for everyone else but she, or something that she was not good enough to own. Intangible as it was, Anu had fought hard to grasp it and still battled to hold on to it. Nothing was written in stone, no relationship safe from the frays and unraveling of time and experiences. It was here for her now, as it had been for short periods in the past, but Anu did not know how long it would last. As hope-filled and starry-eyed as she was heartbreak in the past had given her that realistic viewpoint.

“I’m sure you will.” Anu concluded. The world was not so gracious that it gave everything to those that deserved it, but Anu could believe that Cambria would be lucky and open enough to the possibilities and potential of something that at first did not seem like what she was looking for, or she had once believed what might fit.

Okie, short post to wrap it up ^^ 300+



She trusted that her parents would accept her, and her brother and sister as well, but beyond that she wasn't sure. If the pack knew about Anu and Colibri and accepted them then perhaps everyone in the pack was okay with such relationships. Cambria hoped that that would be the case. The rest of the world she could handle, but if she wouldn't be accepted here in Crimson Dreams that would be awful. The girl never had and likely never would entertain the idea of leaving her birth pack for anywhere else. She loved it here and couldn't understand why anyone would want to leave to go somewhere else. The Marino had never heard any disapproving whispers about Anu's preference for partners and so she figured it was safe to assume that they would accept her as well. Chances were that even after she told her parents though that she wouldn't walk around announcing the fact she liked girls. It just wasn't something she could see herself doing.



As Anu confirmed again that she believed Cambria would find someone to love and lover her in return she smiled shyly up at the Lt. General. "Thank you Anu, for everything." Not only for believing she would find someone but for helping her through this in the first place. The girl honestly wasn't sure who else she would have talked to about her confusion and could see now how important it was to have spoken about it. If she had just kept it all inside it probably would have driven her crazy or forced her into some state of denial. Anu had been there for her though, as she always had been, and Cambria knew she would never be able to thank her enough for the countless times the woman had helped her.