[P] I'm just your problem
[Fiora]
#1
OOC: finally started this yay! vague outdoors setting is vague~ :) WC: 397
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Still nothing. Florina glared down at her paws, a seething anger building in her sharp silver gaze. She let out a bark of frustration, and dug her paws into the mud, tearing up clumps of earth in a flurry of pent-up energy. She still couldn't shift. It hadn't bothered her as much when she knew it would take all of the Aeska time, that they had to grow into their bodies before they would have the strength to change forms. It was a rite of passage. Granted, Florina had still been impatient, but she knew in her heart that with her determination and the strength she accrued with each day of exploration, she was going to be the first in the family to shift.


Except... she wasn't. Fiora was. Shy little Fiora had stunned them all with a traumatic shift, "too early" their mother had said. They were supposed to be ready in the springtime, and this was still winter. But it happened anyway, and Florina had been left behind. She tried to remain cool and collected, to believe that any day now her time would come and she, too, would sprout up and join the adults. But each day stretched on interminably, and then the sun would set and nothing had changed at all. It was chafing at her unshakable confidence. For the first time ever, she was starting to doubt herself, and she did not handle doubt very well. What if this was the true cost of her ability? She could not ever feel pain, she was invincible -- but she would be stuck on all fours like a puppy while her family rode horses and gardened and raised birds and crafted things and forgot about her?


A thick growl rumbled from the wolfdog's chest, and she flopped down into the shallow hole she had scratched into the exposed dirt. She didn't like uncertainty, and she hated waiting. All she knew was action. If she wanted something to happen, she would just do it herself. Feelings were stupid, especially bad feelings like this one coiling in her gut, making her lash out violently. Everyone was paying Fiora so much attention now. Fio was pretty, with her silky black mane and her long legs. Florina didn't care about being pretty, that was stupid too. So it was even stupider to feel jealous of her sister... right?


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#2
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I wish you knew how much I suffer



Confusion, a feeling that was rather familiar to the child but now seemed to be a more confusing time than ever. She was no longer in the form a puppy her age, instead she was adorned with two legs instead of four. Black fingers replace the spot where her front toes would wiggle in the snow, and a silky array of black curls seemed to fall down her back. Every time she woke in the middle of the night, she would just stare at the moving appendages on her hand as she fiddled with stray strands of her mane. This was not what she wanted, she wanted to be familiar. Sure she was the same frightened child that jumped and screeched at a bump in the night, a girl that shivered away from anything different and that could be dangerous but now she was something foreign. She was not herself; instead she was similar to her mother. That was not a bad thing; she always wanted to looked like her mother but never this early. She was finding with four legs and having to look up at the scary world around her.



Her fingered curled into her hand, pressing the clawed tips to press into the palm. The pain always seemed to help her think, at least lately it help her think. A nifty little trick if you were okay with inflicting pain on yourself, it was the smallest price to pay just to get her to not think everything so thoroughly. She was never one to want to be shifted into a two legged animal; no she just wanted to be as pretty as her mother but that was never going to happen. She was the wrong color; her hair was long and black. All she shared with the maternal female was her eyes, but even now they darkened only slightly to make them different. Her arms fell to her side as she tried to breath, letting her fingers fettle with the frayed shorts that covered her rear and the front half of her lower body. Even if it was just a little, it helped her feel not so.. naked.



Dodger blue eyes finally opened again to the winder filled world, searching for the one thing that caused her early shift. A sigh of relief filled the air around her as she moved once more, realizing she had lost the dappled beast. Maybe she could return home, would the creature look for her there? She could only wish that he had not figured that one out so quickly, but there was only one way to find out. In her new form she had advantaged over her rougher siblings, she could cover more distances. That was useful when they wanted to gang up on her, though that seemed to fade for a small moment since they seemed to distance themselves from her. A soft whine escaped her lips, sadness filling her eyes as she wished they would not hate her. Wishing her silver eyed sister would not look at her with such a rage that made her flinch at just the thought. Her movements ceased when she came across a familiar figure that was lying in a dug in hole, moving two steps closer before giving a soft whimper to let her know she was there. She wanted to say her sister’s name but she was afraid of just saying her name would show her sadness and depression.

wow I suck.. so late and I am so sorry.. we can fordate it not if you like

580 words


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#3
No worries, the date is fine for me. :> WC: 304
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Florina glared at her muddy paws, as her cream-furred tail lashed in agitation. She hated waiting, and she hated this stupid feeling. She was better than this. She didn't deserve to feel... un-special. Uncle Saul knew she was special, he had seen her fly with his falcon and he knew she was invincible. Other puppies might get sick, or hurt, or cry like babies, but never Florina. She was the best. She was supposed to be capable of anything...

Flori was still growling faintly under her breath, but she didn't miss the sound of a whimper. Her tall wolfdog ears snapped back, and she peered up over her shoulder, spotting the unmistakable curvy shape of her sister. "Fiora," she grumbled, bitterness seeping into her tone. She pushed off the ground and stood, not bothering to shake free the clumps of dirt from her pale coat. Fiora looked a lot like their mom now, petite and feminine. Florina would rather be big and strong than some fragile little flower, but she couldn't deny the envy she felt looking over her littermate. No wonder their mom liked Fio best.

Silver eyes squinted in scrutiny. "Why don't you just tell me how you did it?" she demanded abruptly. There had to be a secret. Maybe the grownups wouldn't tell her, but she could coerce Fiora into saying anything. She took a threatening step forward, tail flagging high in dominance.

Sure, Fiora was taller than her in this form, but it didn't make her any stronger. She still looked like a weakling. A flimsy, beautiful, weakling. Like a stupid flower to be squished underfoot. That was how they solved conflict in their home, wasn't it? Wrestle over it, and whoever ended up on top was the victor. There would be no running away crying to mother this time.


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