Who is to blame for the way you made me?

[p. Kamari]

POSTED: Thu Jul 11, 2019 9:37 pm

Probably sometime in the middle of the night. Again.

Krios had come home before Kamari. In that beautifully quiet who knew how long he had managed to clean himself up of the smell of the bar and other patrons, even if nothing untoward had happened. He knew that Kamari would not appreciate him reeking of strangers, especially strange women.

Unfortunately, he had mistakenly attempted to use a bottle of clear liquor used for medical purposes first before switching to the much smaller bottle of floral water for cleaning fur behind the house. The water bucket swirled with the dust of the road and the excess dry grass that got caught in his fur before he brushed it out. At least he was a very sanitary drunk at that point before he perfumed himself. He even managed to stay upright despite swaying in considerably dramatic angles.

So, bathed and smelling more like a fermented rose than anything else, he had settled himself to sleep on his ever-so-lovely pile of furs. Belle, the pretty kitty that Brocade had so kindly given him, came to glide against him for a moment before pausing in disgust at his smell. Her nose rankled as she mewled her distaste at him and all Krios could do was wave his arm pointlessly at her. Belle slipped back out of the door, which remained slightly ajar.

Likely, she was going to tattle to the other cats in the house that her owner was completely sloshed again. Damn tattle-tale kitty-cat. Krios giggled as he turned on his furs, feeling somewhat uncomfortable.

He wiggled aggressively, trying to get a good spot hollowed out in his pile of furs where he could get comfortable. Why was that spot so lumpy? He elbowed the fur and hit something hard but the lump of discomfort was dislodged and he settled into the groove like a babe to the teat.

Krios hiccuped contentedly as he shut his eyes, unable to smell the wine that was slowly pouring out of the bottle he had dislodged with his elbow. It ran a rivulet down the uneven dirt floor and stained it dark brown. The smell was overwhelming but his poor nose only burned of roses.

Krios Revlis
Come touch me like I’m an ordinary man. Have a look in my eyes. Underneath my skin there is a violence

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Salsola
Striker (NPC)
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Gen
Vedetto, Milite Mate to Kamari
Bloode Moste Potente
buy back the secrets

POSTED: Fri Jul 12, 2019 2:12 am

Optime | The Ruins (KamKrios House) | Night | NPCs: Stone & Agate (Brief) (+784)


When she finally arrived at the house, it was late. She led Cedar over to the paddock and relieved him of his riding gear. The pair had been out training under Velimir’s instructions, attempting to further sharpen their bond and hone their skills for night skirmishes. The times Kamari had in-between her missions beyond the Kingdom’s borders were often filled with such training sessions under the old Voronin, and the lesson that night had been a long and arduous one.

A dip in the small lake behind the house rinsed her of the scent of a long day’s hard work, and left her smelling wild and refreshing instead of like an overworked dog. She shook out her fur, collecting her neatly folded clothes as she made her way back to the house. As she drew closer, she hadn’t expected the strong scent of tainted roses to assault her. Her nose wrinkled, and any weariness from her earlier duties and training quickly evaporated.

Following her nose, she found the source of the smell centralized to a particular area. The ground was wet, and the bucket nearby still had a few droplets in it. Dropping down to a crouch, she took a few more inquisitive sniffs, exhaling sharply as she recognized her husband’s scent mingled amongst it all.

He was coming home late again, something that had started to become a habit recently. It had started before she had left on her mission southeast, and she had caught him coming home at odd hours a few more times since her return to the Kingdom. Kamari had an inkling of what he was doing, however, since their last fight, she had been reluctant to confront him again. She wasn’t ready to deal with another session of trying to figure out if drunk Krios was just mouthing off or if what he’d said was really how he felt when sober.

She stood up and turned to go back to the house. The cats were out on the porch when she came up to the back door. Agate and Belle were perched on the woodpile, and Stone stood to his feet at the sight of her. “Stone, don’t—” Agate tried to plead.

“He’s drunk again,” the large tomcat growled, ignoring his cousin.

Kamari let out an irritated, calming sigh as her feline companion confirmed what she had already suspected. “I thought he might be,” she whispered, opening the door and continuing into the house. Inside, it was dark, but, the Emissary knew every inch of it by heart. She had every intention to continue on to her room, but the strong stench of alcohol burned her nose more than the fermented rose water had.

The Emissary ignored it, shaking her head as she continued towards her own bedroom. With her clothes clutched against her chest, she opened the door softly and slipped inside. As she closed it though, she found her hand lingering on the wood. Something—worry?—ate at her.

As much as he made her mad and pissed her off, he was still her friend.

She put her clothes down onto a nearby dresser, plucking the tunic from the top of the pile and putting it on. Slipping back out of her room, she silently made her way to Krios’. The stench of alcohol grew stronger as she quietly eased the ajar door further open, and she wondered just how much he had had to drink that his flower water could not mask it.

Everything in her told her to leave him to wallow. If he was going to get that drunk, he would only be insufferable if he was able to speak coherently at all.

In the darkness, she found her husband laying on his bed, and, on the floor, a dark, pooling liquid had spread out. Alarmed, Kamari quickly crossed through the threshold and towards Krios without asking for permission, her nostrils flaring to make sure she hadn’t somehow missed the scent of blood. All she could smell was the overpowering stench of wine though. Upon reaching his bedside, instead of feeling relieved that he wasn’t hurt, she found her anger flaring as she realized it was just spilt wine.

Really? Krios?” She snarled loudly, hoping to rouse him from whatever stupor or half-dazed state he might have been in. She saw the lump in his bed furs, and—with a clawed hand—she threw back the edge of the pelt. Moonlight twinkled on the neck of a partially-drained bottle of wine.

She was seething.

“Is being drunk at that bar not enough for you anymore?” She snapped, glaring at him.

Kamari Kaiser

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Salsola
The Inquisitor
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Songbird
Moderator Luperci Sapienza, Vedetta Mate to Krios Royalty of a Fallen Kingdom
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Amongst Shadows
Bearer of Masks

POSTED: Sat Jul 13, 2019 11:52 am

--

It was a very shallow dream that clung to his brain. The smell of roses and alcohol in reality had him panicking in that light slumber that he was failing to distill a rose wine and that it was all coming out wrong, with the specter of his aunt leering at him out of the shadows, calling him a disgrace to his Heiwa blood. His limbs twitched a bit as he tried to reach the deeper throws of sleep but the voice that was not his aunts sharply slapped him right back into wakefulness.

Well, groggy wakefulness as he jerked himself half upright, supporting himself on his elbows and blinking unevenly in the dim night. It was still night, certainly, which meant that something had happened or Kamari was mad. Or both. Honestly, probably both knowing her.

Whut? he said, addled by sleepiness as he attempted to rub it from an eye. Kamari lunging forward and forcing back the furs that he happened to be laying on made him scramble to the side somewhat, as he tried to process what exactly was happening to him. A difficult task considering he was still under the effects of the alcohol he had consumed at the bar and having been attempting to sleep.

Krios looked down at the bottle, half-empty of its blood red contents. He could not even smell the wine in the air over the floral water and the liquor that still clung to his pelt. Spilled wine? No good. He frowned deeply at the loss as he reached for the bottle, righting it and examining the quantity left. Kamari's tones echoed in his head like knives, demanding to be answered, but he could not muster a good response.

At least it wasn't a good one, he mumbled, casually tossing the half-full bottle across the room so that it rattled on the floor and bumped on the wall, dots of liquid covering the trajectory on the floor. What's it to you what I do in my own room or my own time? So what? he said sharply, glaring at her with watery eyes that burned with the need to sleep. The whites were tinted red, not from cannabis use, but from exhaustion.

Krios pushed himself up a bit more and ignored the unsettling sensation in his belly as the contents shifted somewhat. What do you care so long as I do my duties and come home safe with our good name intact? What do you care so long as you're not tainted by what I do? So long as I don't disgrace our marriage vows? he asked, his voice rising. Not a single word was slurred but it was clear that the Striker was tired.

Krios Revlis
Come touch me like I’m an ordinary man. Have a look in my eyes. Underneath my skin there is a violence

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Salsola
Striker (NPC)
User avatar
Gen
Vedetto, Milite Mate to Kamari
Bloode Moste Potente
buy back the secrets

POSTED: Sun Jul 14, 2019 12:20 am

(+323)


Her anger-filled words roused him quickly enough, though, he was by no means lucid. He was slow to react, and even slower still to process what she was furious about. She wondered how often he visited that bar, how many surveyance missions he went on that were really just excuses to intoxicate himself and drown out everything that made him unhappy. Had his frequency increased while she had been away from the Kingdom?

Krios regarded the bottle she had found, looking at it and the mess he had made with it. Then…he tossed it aside, letting it clink against the floor and roll away, spilling more of its vile liquid that slowly seeped from its broken seal. His nonchalance, his comment, they all caused her lips to curl.

He didn’t care.

The Revlis seemed to sober by the second, his words taking on that sharp, hateful edge as they had many times before when he had gotten drunk. “I care because you’re my friend, Krios. Is this really what you want to do?” She challenged, gesturing to the dark stains growing on the floor of his shadowed room. “Wallow in your self-pity and drink yourself into oblivion? You have so much potential and talent, and you allow yourself to become no better than those drunks at that bar. Belle won’t even come in here!”

Kamari stood back, her fingers curling into fists. “I’m sure your mother would have been real proud of you right now.”

She spoke with venom on her tongue. She was tired of this, of him coming home late completely drunk. He had become a liability, to the Kingdom and to himself. What if someone took advantage of his inebriated state and followed him home? Robbed him? Attacked him? Dragged him off or burned him alive like they had Loki?

The thought made something in her chest catch.

Did he really not care?

Kamari Kaiser

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Salsola
The Inquisitor
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Songbird
Moderator Luperci Sapienza, Vedetta Mate to Krios Royalty of a Fallen Kingdom
Seeker of Secrets
Amongst Shadows
Bearer of Masks

POSTED: Sun Jul 14, 2019 10:10 am

--

Why did it always seem to come to verbal blows with his wife? Why did it always seem like they were speaking the same language but a different dialect so something was always mixed up and misunderstood. Inevitably, she was in the right, though. Kamari was always right or so it seemed. There were plenty of times when she did not quite get it but she was right more often than not. He ought to have listened to her more, but his stubbornness fought logic.

It took name-dropping to get through his miasma of sorrow. He looked to the doorway, where his cat sat trim and pretty with her tail delicately waving behind her. Her nose seemed somewhat rankled and it was clear she was not passing through the threshold.

Krios looked up at Kamari as she stood back, her fists balled up in anger. He swallowed hard as a lump started building in his throat: it refused to dissipate.

I.. I don't know what else to do, he admitted haltingly. Krios looked down at his hands. They were still his hands and not the hands of a drunk, he figured, but yet his head swam and his heart hurt. Was this what happened to his father? Was this how he had been conceived? He had heard the story that his mother had taken advantage of his father in his drunken state and conceived him and his stillborn sister, though it was not public knowledge and contrary to the tale he himself spun to protect their reputation.

I don't want to become like Lokr. But I don't know what to do. Everyday hurts. Tears welled up in his eyes but he blinked them away. He was too strong of a person to cry again. He had shed his tears early and that was all that he felt permitted. Even his grandmother was moving on, though it was clear that she was tired more than anything else.

Krios did not know what on earth he was doing lately. It feels like knives here, he said, pressing his fingertips to his chest. I couldn't even save my mother from her sister. What kind of protector am I? Krios swallowed back his emotions again. That was why he drank, not just to dull the pain of a spouse that did not love him. He was not so shallow as that, contrary to what everyone seemed to think of him. What kind of Shield am I? His throat caught and he clamped his mouth shut and stared at the furs.

Then, he looked up. You should just leave me for some one better. O'Riley. That was someone better.

Krios Revlis
Come touch me like I’m an ordinary man. Have a look in my eyes. Underneath my skin there is a violence

Player WikiCommissionsCharacter Wiki
Salsola
Striker (NPC)
User avatar
Gen
Vedetto, Milite Mate to Kamari
Bloode Moste Potente
buy back the secrets

POSTED: Wed Jul 17, 2019 9:16 pm

(+468)


Her cornflower blue eyes were hard and resolute as they stared him down, expecting Krios to lash out at her. Instead of anger though, she received solemn reflection and admittance. Her words—cruelly chosen as they might have been in her disappointment and anger—seemed to reach through to him. The hate, the bitterness, the heat to his words, it all left. His bloodshot eyes looked up at her, and she saw the man that had tried to confide in her the last time he had been caught stumbling through their door late at night.

He needed help, and he was asking for it.

Kamari let him speak, her anger slowly dissipating and leaving her body the longer he spoke. His mother’s death had really affected him, more than he had let on for months afterwards. He, like many others in the Kingdom—herself included—portrayed a proud and stubborn individual without weakness. He had bottled it up, hid it from the world, and Kamari herself only witnessed it because her confronting him in a less than ideal state.

Krios was hurting.

When he finished, suggesting that she leave him, only then did Kamari finally react.

This time, she would not abandon him.

She moved forward, coming to kneel before him, her off-white hands moving to attempt to cover his larger ones. She looked up at him, her gaze softer than it had been when she had first roused him. “You couldn’t have known your aunt’s intentions, Krios. None of us knew, and the fact that it took us as long as it did to apprehend her shows that she played us all for a fool, not just you.”

Kamari looked down at their hands and took a breath. “You’re the Striker,” she reminded him, her words soft and slow, “You excel with the bow and tracking down a trail, of securing our borders and what lies beyond it. Stubborn as a mule as you may be, you’re smart and quick-thinking, both in reflexes and with your words. In this Kingdom, there is no other worthy of your title.” She closed her eyes and let out a small breath. “You are not a man driven by politics or blinded by personal greed. You are care about others, and their wellbeing. When the Queen made her decree to investigate the Sanctum murders, and we thought your aunt might be involved, your first thought was to protect your siblings and to ensure their safety above any personal revenge.”

Opening her eyes, she concluded. That’s the kind of Shield you are.” She did not look up. “You may piss me off and get under my skin sometimes, but…” She took a breath. “I’m not giving up on you simply because you care.”

Kamari Kaiser

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Salsola
The Inquisitor
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Songbird
Moderator Luperci Sapienza, Vedetta Mate to Krios Royalty of a Fallen Kingdom
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Amongst Shadows
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POSTED: Wed Jul 17, 2019 10:36 pm

--

Alcohol had stripped him to his bones every time he overindulged. Each time, it would peel back his layers and leave the shed pain like a snake skin. But every morning afterward his bones were hastily shoved right back into ill-fitting attire. A wash in cold water would shrink it all back neatly into place, as though he had never shrugged off his misery. And so, Salsola would see the Revlis bastard wearing his indifferent and confidence air without a hint of it having ever been shorn.

Before Kamari he lay open and bare in that grey moment between sobriety and the descent into oblivion. It was a moment he would remember but his mind did not have the strength to cover up its glorious misdeeds before his wife. Kamari saw all that he had beneath the surface and there was nothing glorious about it.

Krios felt her much smaller hands lay atop his but he did not raise his gaze to meet her's despite the visible twitch of his fingers.

Her words were like a candle in the dark, but even then it seemed far and out of reach. Kamari was the shadow with eyes among the Shield, her gaze piercing through the shadows and the web of lies she spun about her like a cocoon. Of course she would notice those things about him; she lived with him and spent enough time to know what kind of creature the Striker was. But he had shown her his weakness and the thing that Krios knew above all else was that weakness was not acceptable in a blue-blood Salsolan noble.

Caring is not the Salsolan way, he replied slowly, trying to pretend that her words did not lift his spirits despite the slow clenching of his fingers around her smaller digits. It was more of a cradling than truly gripping, but he could feel the faint presence of her beating heart through the touch. Wealth, possessions, status. Honor. Reputation. Deceit. These are the Salsolan way. Krios tried to want those things, but the only one he had any interest in was the honor he had earned merely by being born into the family he had. Luck was not honor.

His touch receded from her palms, as though deflating. I'm serious. Someone else might be better for you. Someone not... unraveled by this life. Krios felt the lump in his throat catch and he could not believe himself saying what he was letting slip. What's the difference in a loveless match with me and a loveless match with the Erilaz? At least he is not.. not.. He is not weak. Krios was, after all, born into a tainted line.

Krios Revlis
Come touch me like I’m an ordinary man. Have a look in my eyes. Underneath my skin there is a violence

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Salsola
Striker (NPC)
User avatar
Gen
Vedetto, Milite Mate to Kamari
Bloode Moste Potente
buy back the secrets

POSTED: Wed Jul 17, 2019 11:37 pm

(+443)


He argued with her reasoning, though, it was not like their usual bouts where their words were heated or filled with ire. He was trying to reason with himself, trying to explain how he wasn’t the prized nobleman as one expected of his station and lineage within a Kingdom that thrived off of personal image, self-gain, and prestige. It was true, he was not like most highborns. With his nobility, he had to the potential to grow to be just like the rest of them, but, he hadn’t.

“So what?” She challenged, noticing that his fingers had slightly curled receptively around her own. Chuckling softly—a way to distract herself—she admitted, “I think the way you are makes you better than the other highborns.” It was a breath of fresh air, individuals like him, Idrieus, and Brocade, who cared less about their status and one-upping their fellow Salsolans and more about the relationships they built. “Had you been like the rest of them, we likely would have never been friends to begin with.”

The thought made her count her lucky stars that Elphaba had chosen Krios of all of the highborns to betroth her to. To another, Kamari might have still been viewed as property due to her lowborn roots, might have been forced to be an obedient, submissive housewife, might have been forced to suffer unwanted touches of her person, might have been forced to bed and bear children she didn’t want. Yes, she had certainly been lucky that Krios was not like the men of her parents’ tales.

His hands suddenly withdrew from her own, causing her eyes to snap up to his face. Krios persisted that she could do better than him, once more, bringing her partner, O’Riley, into their conversation. Whether he still harbored jealousy for what the Erilaz and she had, Kamari chose not to pursue it. “And you’re not either,” she argued with him, her brows furrowing as she stared at him intently. “You’re stronger than you give yourself credit for, Krios.” The fact that he had not become completely broken from his mother’s death was proof as much.

“So, you hit a rough spot? I’ve never known you as someone who gives up.” Kamari looked at him imploringly. “Everyone has their weaknesses. I’m not going to abandon you just because you still blame yourself for your mother’s death. There is much worse you could have done.”

She stood up suddenly, looking distractedly towards the abandoned bottle. “Besides, I’m comfortable here.” Her nose crinkled. “Even if it reeks of alcohol at the moment.”

Kamari Kaiser

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Salsola
The Inquisitor
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Songbird
Moderator Luperci Sapienza, Vedetta Mate to Krios Royalty of a Fallen Kingdom
Seeker of Secrets
Amongst Shadows
Bearer of Masks

POSTED: Thu Jul 18, 2019 6:04 pm

--

Somewhere in that faint haze, Kamari's words penetrated deeply like a knife cut butter. Kamari was not often so decidedly open with him and it was something that he had to relish while he could. When would he get such an opportunity to do so again? Not that she was dishonest with him the rest of the time, but the nature of her work and their positions within a very unforgiving society meant that there was so much more danger in anything spoken.

Not once had he thought to force himself upon his wife like others might have with their own spouses, especially ones given to them like some kind of paltry possession. It had occurred to him that it would have been within his prerogative to make that claim, especially since that was the exact sort of noble privilege that the man should have exercised. Instead, Krios kept himself restrained in every imaginable way.

Despite the fact that theirs was not a match made on affection and love, he never sought it in the arms of another. Affairs were probably rife in Salsola but they were never discussed unless shaming the participants was the goal. Who knew which Salsolan was bedding another behind the backs of their spouses or partners? Kamari probably knew, actually, but Krios did not ever seek to add himself to those ranks.

He flirted with girls at Biff's Bar but he never, not once, took one to bed like the first woman he had ever been with. Krios had every right, too, to do so provided he maintain discretion. And yet, he was more touch starved than a caged bear.

Krios was silent as he raised his eyes up to her as she stood suddenly. Her movement made it seem suddenly colder than before as her presence so close to him disappeared.

What can I do, then? I don't.. I need something to do. He did not know how to clearly formulate the words he needed to say. His tongue tripped up as his fingers locked together and his eyes slowly focused on the bottle he had tossed so carelessly. I.. I need help. His eyes shut. Will you please help? he asked, voice soft and so very hopeless.

Krios Revlis
Come touch me like I’m an ordinary man. Have a look in my eyes. Underneath my skin there is a violence

Player WikiCommissionsCharacter Wiki
Salsola
Striker (NPC)
User avatar
Gen
Vedetto, Milite Mate to Kamari
Bloode Moste Potente
buy back the secrets

POSTED: Sat Jul 20, 2019 2:51 pm

(+331)


Her eyes flicked back to him when he asked for her guidance. While it was true what she had said, that Krios was stronger than he credited himself for, looking down at him in that moment, he was a shadow of the man she had known growing up. His confidence, his arrogance, his quick wit, they were all absent from him in that dark, moonlit room that smelt strongly of fermented roses and wine.

He needed help, and desperately so.

Krios pleaded for her to help him, and Kamari moved over to the bottle. Bending, she plucked it from the floor by its neck and pushed the cork down firmly so that it was tightly sealed once more. Returning back to Krios, she held it out for him to take. “Get rid of these,” she told him, her tone and wording indicating that she suspected he had more hidden around the house given his earlier choice of words regarding the bottle in her hand. Her cornflower blue eyes shifted to the various places where the wine had spilt. “And clean this up in the morning.”

In her own way, she had agreed to help him, however, he would need to do the hard part himself if he wanted to prove to her that he was willing to, truly, cease his excessive drinking habits.

She knelt down to his level again, an arm resting across her leg as she looked at him. “Once you’ve cleaned up the house and yourself, perhaps we can do some training together when we’re off-duty?” A small, mischievous smirk began to curl at the edge of her lips. “Unless you think you can’t beat me?” It was a challenge. Sparring against one another, practicing on their private archery range, racing their horses, hunting, amongst many other ways to hone their skills; if Krios needed to have his confidence in his abilities restored and maintained, starting up their old games should do the trick.

Kamari Kaiser

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Salsola
The Inquisitor
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Songbird
Moderator Luperci Sapienza, Vedetta Mate to Krios Royalty of a Fallen Kingdom
Seeker of Secrets
Amongst Shadows
Bearer of Masks

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