Singer in the Darkness

[p] - Lucia

POSTED: Mon Feb 11, 2019 4:21 pm

Trees flicked past. Each broad trunk passed with a whoosh of air and sound. Paws dug deep into rich dirt, flinging the red blur ever deeper into the expanse. Eros’s body left the ground for seconds at a time, a lupus form, stretched into a graceful arc. Leaping logs and dodging between groves, his pace never slowly. It was a blistering pace and unrelenting. Clouds of hot breath rose and vanished into the cold winter evening. The fiery pelted male wasn’t sure how long he’d been running, he’d started by the fort and had just kept on going, unwilling to stop, and realising his lupus relished the speed. Where he was going and how long it would take him to get there were both unimportant, the joy was in the act, and something in him felt constrained here.

A fight raged, and Eros was often always the winner, but this one was between him and himself. The loner and the pack wolf, both were strong and both were unyielding. His family were in Casa, an estranged family that had, nevertheless, accepted him back in, but there were rules, and there were compromises, and the list felt endless.

Eros had lost concentration, deep as he was in his reverie, and a stumble was inevitable. It was the fiery Damaichu’s quick reactions that saved him, and with the warning heeded, Eros slowed, his sides heaving and he looked about, only vaguely recognising where he was, but knowing that he was here alone. Pushing his front paws into the forest floor, Eros raised his hind quarters in the air and stretched, he then reversed the movement to do the same with his back legs, before loping forwards and looking into a small pool, his golden eyes stared back at him, framed as they were by the night sky above. The Damaichu leant down and began to drink, sending ripples out, disturbing the surface, and enjoying the cool sweetness after his exertion.

Water dripping from his muzzle, the fiery pelted male looked at the night sky. Finally alone again, a note in his chest began to reverberate there. Closing his eyes, Eros lifted his head and didn’t resist it. He opened his mouth and allowed the liquid song to erupt from him. It was a beautiful sound, and one that was quite at odds with what those who knew him, might expect from Eros. A liquid fluidity that sounded hauntingly eerie and held a note of melancholy exposed a deep sense of loneliness. The notes flowed from him effortlessly, Eros was relaxed and knew that none would recognise the sound as he rarely howled, or allowed himself to sing.
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Draiko

POSTED: Wed Apr 03, 2019 4:56 pm

Flower gleam and glow,
let your power shine
See the Light, it's blinding

The great stone creation settled a fear into her heart that she had never been able to shake. It was a cold and cruel thing, in her mind. It separated pack-mates from each other and bid them sleep apart, to be alone during the most vulnerable of times. She did not pass beneath the huge stone arch if she could help it. She was ever fearful that it would all fall to rubble and crush her.

These wolves did not think as she did, they did not follow the wilder ways. The aching fissure where New Dawn had been pained her every day of her life. Lucia wished fervently for her mother, for her siblings, for those she had run with.

Casa had such a wealth of wilderness to call their own and in a twist that was ever strange to Lucia, the vast majority chose to stay within these walls. She had come to seek out Callum, but at the entrance to the wooden gates Lucia turned aside without a thought, pursuing something else.

Beneath a midnight sky, Lucia followed.

A soulful song breached the trees, halting the Amarok in her gentle lope. Her breath billowed, a soft gasp. They might not know it, but She did.

The landscape about her wavered, blurring behind a veil of watery tears. She could see the little ball of orange, so bright, like fire. His eyes still the baby blue of all infants, barely even aware enough to look at his surroundings. Lucia could hear, a reedy cry, that warbled and broke, cracking as ice in the spring. Voices that excitedly asked her to re-tell the same stories again and again.

She was awash with her memories that hurt so much, each and every one of them a piercing reminder of what she had lost.

A fully grown male sung though, where once a boy had yowled to the moon with her, 'Louder now, so she can hear us. She'll turn her face each night to listen to us better.'

Lucia was silence in the forest, moving beneath the shadows as she had done all her life. Each paw touching the ground with gentle grace. She was a fine creation, a perfect example of what a wolf should, and could, be. The distance lessened beneath her feet.

Glorious, the light of the moon's face struck Eros' pelt and he shone in its bathing luminescent glow.

She held no wish to interrupt, the loneliness resounded however, bridging the gap across to her own fostered feelings. Lucia was inherently alone in her solitary life.

'Come.' It called to her, Lucia was powerless to say no.

Into the moonlight she stepped, canting her head to the dark sky, and the little lupus female sang.

The weight of her grief was physical, those who had perished in war and peace. The ones disappeared to other lands. Children who had grown into their own selves; And always, the ever turning nature of time itself.

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POSTED: Mon Apr 08, 2019 3:26 pm

His song grew stronger and louder, the howl seeming to break into two voices before reforming, flowing into the night. Eros poured more into that song than he had into anything for a long time, so much that the line between him and his howl began to blur. Pain, loneliness and loss, they were all there. It was perverse how such sad emotions could make something so hauntingly beautiful. He sang of a pack that no longer existed, of a life brother, play mate and partner in crime who had left him. The fiery pelted male cried out over a family shattered, taken for granted and now never to be placed back together. Most of all though, he sung of his pain, a pain that was with him always, that infected his heart, his mind, his very essence. When the response came, Eros’s song broke off, surprise and shock at having been approached and not aware of the intruder upon his private moment.

If it had been anyone else, the fiery Damaichu would have grown angry at the invasion, or perhaps adopted an air of indifference or false braggadocio. It wasn’t anyone else though, it was a small lupus whose familiar scent reminded him of nights snuggled beside her. Just looking at her, Eros could remember the beat of her heart and feel of her wet nose against his back. He remembered her stories, remembered her saving him from trouble. Right then, there was nothing that needed to be said. Instead, Eros’s expression grew thoughtful, before once again his muzzle pointed back into the night sky and he sang. This song was of New Dawn, of Altair, the authority who had taught Eros so much when he’d finally been forced to listen.

”One day Lucia, I’m going to go across the borders, I want to see what’s there!” Eros’s own words echoed in his head. ”Mum is sad all the time Lucia, and dad is sick. I can’t cheer mum up and they won’t let me see dad.” Had Eros really been such a little idiot?

Finally his song came to an end, and for an endless moment the fiery pelted Damaichu said nothing. Eros broke the silence though.

”I didn’t realise you’d arrived. It’s good to see you Lucia.” Eros said, making no mention of the emotional song he’d released into the night.
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Draiko

POSTED: Mon Apr 15, 2019 3:43 am

Flower gleam and glow,
let your power shine
See the Light, it's blinding

It tore away at her, the suffering she heard captured within his own voice. The instincts of pup-sitter, of care-giver, of Aunt grew within her and she wished with all the stars in the sky that she might wash away his hurts with a gentle swipe of her tongue and soothing, loving words. She could not stand the pain that glimmered like pin-pricks of fire, simmering away.

Eros had always been different, in a way beyond comprehension. Lucia accepted that she could never fix this part of him, not that it had stopped her from trying regardless. Love had rained upon him, upon all of them as the falling petals of flowering cherry trees drifted down ever so preciously in the springtime.

She had attempted to temper the tempestuous tumult that consumed him inside. She had tried her best to smother it with caring, and kindness. Lucia had promised to love him 'always and forever'.

Lucia would keep her promise until her dying day.

Eros broke away from song and Lucia continued her own. He would re-join, or not, but either way Lucia could not halt herself now. It poured out, a dam broken to allow swirling waters through. They both reeled in memory, serenading the stars with their sadness, both joint and separate.

Even Lucia had been powerless to stop the calamities that had appeared to plague New Dawn's final months. As always, she had tried.

Like all things, this also came to an end. The quiescence stretched, loud in the absence of their final notes.

"It's good to see you too, Eros." The truth of her words gleamed, she had forever been glad to see him. She moved closer, paws rustling the dead leaves beneath them until she sat by his side, peering up at the dark sky.

"They say you decided to stay here now." It was not quite a question, he smelled of Casa's lands, but she wanted confirmation for herself.

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POSTED: Sun May 12, 2019 6:27 am

Eros watched Lucia a moment longer, finding her presence in this place strangely incongruous. Still, Eros was glad to see the one who had spent so much time raising him, his safety net. Gracefully, Eros folded his haunches beneath him and set, his pelt touching hers. Her closeness, familiarity and her scent might almost make Eros believe that the two were once again in New Dawn…almost.

Lowering his head, Eros gently nibbled at Lucia’s neck fur, moving his teeth across the fur, nibbling for ticks or fleas, knowing there would be none there, but the gesture was one of affection and close family bonding. It was a gesture that came easily in this form, in this place and with this female. Lucia was and would always be, one of the members of a small pack, which he held in his heart, although the members on that list were a closely guarded secret. Lucia’s not quite question, made Eros sit up, looking back into the woods in the direction of the court house.

”Maybe.” the fiery pelted Damaichu began ”I’ve not decided yet.” he continued reluctantly.

Again Eros allowed a silence to fall between them, but it wasn’t awkward or uncomfortable, it was the silence between to old family members knowing that there is no rush.

”I lived with Altair for a while.” Eros began again, but he didn’t mention why. ”He…pointed out a few things. When he left with his family…” It had been a blow and had set Eros adrift, but the war that constantly raged within him wouldn’t allow Eros to admit it to anyone. He had instead thrown himself into his work, drugs, booze and a lot of sex.

”I went back to New Dawn for a while.” Eros snorted derisively, or perhaps self-deprecatingly. ”It’s pretty pathetic I spent so much time trying to get out of that place, and then I came back and wallowed in nostalgia.” He looked at Lucia with an amused grin ”If you tell anyone that though, I’ll deny it.”

Eros’s tail twitched. Lupus was a comfortable form for him, but hearts to hearts were always made easier by weed, something much harder to smoke with no hands. Eros took a deep breath, letting out slowly before he started talking again.

”Anyway, it’s certainly been…an experience trying to live here.” He lowered his head, placing his cheek against Lucia’s neck.

”Sure it’d be easier if you were around. You coming to live here?” He asked, feeling the pup inside of him hold its breath with anticipation, and cursing it for being so childish.
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POSTED: Tue May 21, 2019 5:41 pm

Flower gleam and glow,
let your power shine
See the Light, it's blinding

If her eyes filled with tears, they didn't fall, but they rippled and reflected a watery moon within their blueness. If she could right the wrongs of the world, then they would all be together again, even Harlequin. His actions had not diminished her love for him. It had only threaded the devotion with trailing rose thorns that stabbed into her whenever she breathed.

Finding strangeness in the close companionship was not something she ever considered. It was only right that they should lean into each other, touching and being touched. It evoked very well treasured memories, she saw them through their veils of gleaming sunshine. As though the heart of her strove to brighten even such luminosity.

She turned to return the gesture as he spoke, her tongue smoothing down his orange fur.

Eros refused to admit his decision and Lucia only nodded, letting him keep his secretive acceptance without a struggle. She didn't even smile knowingly. Quiet stretched again, and the only sounds were the ones of the forest at night time, though yet conspicuously lacking the drone of insects, it was yet far too cold for their arrival.

The news of Altair's leaving had pierced Lucia like an arrow. She had contemplated running after and joining them. An ice blue eye hovered, and a pair of colorless grey eyes too lingered at the edge, less important, but.. still not to be left behind. The Amarok female had wanted to leave but... she couldn't leave them afloat like that. So she had stayed, and grieved her brother's absence, and accepted the likelihood that she would never see any of her blooded birth-family again.

Grief was her companion now, cloaking her as a second pelt.

"I must have missed your scent then, and you mine." Lucia's little cottage was set close in old New Dawn territory, but it was sequestered away where it could not be obviously found. They had reconnected afterwards, a while afterwards, when Lucia had thought him dead.

"Of course not." She returned his smile, the aging lines of her face turning with mirth. "We can't let anyone know you have emotions." It hearkened back to a time, as a young boy, when he had told her that warriors didn't feel anything at all, not even pain or fear.

Between them, there was enough thick fur to warm an entire pack, snoozing dreamily away. Heat came from his body, as cheek laid against her neck. Her head tilted, to rest upon his crown. Lucia closed her eyes, and wished that this moment might last forever, untainted by the misery that life sometimes hurried along her way.

And just like that, it was fractured into shards; broken glass-dreams rained down around them.

Ears shrank back, slipping against the arch of her head. Casa was not a place for her -- to visit maybe but not to stay and never to live here. The curl of hope in his voice just about killed her, there and then, knowing she was to crush out it's fragile flicker.

Oh, my bright-flame boy. Sunshine and embers. How I wish...

"No." She spoke softly, aware she was smothering a cautious flame. The quiet hitch of breath spoke the tales of her despair, "I don't belong here, this is not my place."

The place she had belonged was gone, consumed by the blackness of another, stronger, pack. Lucia was unable to let go of those shattered cries in the night, and the smell of blood. She saw New Dawn's fall in her dreams, the slain bodies of her pack-siblings surrounded her wherever she set paw.

Now those silvery tears fell, sliding gracelessly down her cheeks, to drip drip drip so quietly into his fur. The reflection of them showing only deep blue and the pale face of the moon's eye that watched them.

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POSTED: Mon Jun 03, 2019 3:48 pm

It’d been a slim hope that Lucia would agree to stay, but the pup inside of Eros had to try. Lucia was one of the last familiar things, a connection to a past the fiery pelted male had squandered and did his best to return to. In truth it was probably better that she’d said no, after all, she was a weakness, a sentimental spot that threatened to expose him utterly. Yet in this moment, right here, Eros didn’t care. Eros wanted to insist, to press her, he needed her close, but for once the unselfish part of him didn’t pursue it and all he said was.

”I understand.” There was no sadness in his voice, he really did understand her reasons, or that he did at the very least. He sighed contentedly as she placed her head over his, and he began to lick at the scruff of her neck, letting her tears go uncommented upon. Eros didn’t mind being a shoulder for this particular Luperci, and there were no ulterior motives.

”I pride myself on being a pretty heartless person Lucia.” Eros said, with a shadow of a smile ”but it makes me sad that you’re so sad. I wish I could help.” he said, but how could he help? He couldn’t even get his own life together let alone help another person with theirs.

”I’m sorry if I hurt you, and made you sad. I’m pretty good at messing up, learned that when I got chucked out of home. It’s all good though, I’m used to it, but I wish I could make you happy. I hate to think of you all alone and sad, living with all the ghosts.”

Eros very rarely spoke so frankly, or admitted to such deep feelings. In truth, it hurt, along with all of the wounds he carried, it hurt to think that Lucia, one of a handful of Luperci who had showered him with unending affection, had been left packless and in never ending grief. How could help? How could he change things for her? It twisted his unused heart, and a shadow of a protective instinct nudged him to sit a little closer, place a little more of himself protectively over her, keeping her safe.
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Draiko

POSTED: Fri Jul 19, 2019 3:56 pm

Flower gleam and glow,
let your power shine
See the Light, it's blinding

Somehow, his disappointed understanding was so much worse than an angered accusation. Lucia felt she could deal with that emotion, for it was an expression of something. Ultimately, it was just the two of them to remember what had happened and how things had existed. To refuse him hurt more than she would have ever assumed possible, yet to stay would crack her apart -- the ghosts needed their company too.

Tears dried, as they always did, though with habit they fell upon the pelts of her lonely nest rather than the body of another.

If the whispered rumors she had heard of his reputation were true, then heartlessness was the least of it. Lucia couldn't quite bring herself to believe them however, the idea of her little sunshine boy engaging in such monstrous activities consumed her grief and left behind only an emptiness. Lucia breathed out a stillness, a regret for the tarnishing of youth's innocence.

"You could never hurt me, Eros." It tasted false, but it carried the hope that they both needed, like old lullabies drifting through the seas of time. The seeds of haunted memories, casting their fragile roots forwards, seeking nourishment.

She wanted to pull back and look into his face, but loathed to break the embrace they shared. His warmth was nice, a steadiness and the beating of his heart a rhythm she wished she could hear forever, thumping besides her own.

"I'll be okay." Lucia whispered, this time her words shone with the strength of their truth. With the ghosts, that was where she belonged, the remembrance of a kingdom lost, the promise of a welcoming death. Lucia would dance with those ghosts until she became one herself.

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