[M] Caught up in the middle of a headache and a heartbreak

Domovoi

POSTED: Mon Apr 07, 2014 10:24 pm

WARNING: This thread contains material exceeding the general board rating of PG-13. It may contain very strong language, drug usage, graphic violence, or graphic sexual content. Reader discretion is advised.



((541)) ooc. Near the Triple Lakes, about mid-morning. Dom was accepted about eight days ago so a good date would be around the 2nd?

The shiver that rolled down her spine was welcome, cold clarity from the freezing dip sharpening her alertness and the color in her eyes. Whisking her wet hair from around her neck Océane twisted it to rid it of heavy moisture, before turning her eyes to shore. She was able to go fairly deep without losing contact with the sandy basin bottom; her height had always been able to help her out in that aspect. Once she’d climbed from the rippling lake she fell to all fours in her Optime figure, shaking out the water that hid in her thick chocolate fur. Once she’d successfully managed to splatter drops against any surrounding trees, she stood and continued deeper to the forest, where she found a favorite place of hers; a plateau-like boulder that dipped to the sky slightly. The Hineyu stuck her arms against the rock’s surface and swung her legs atop it, bending her knees against the sun-warmed stone. Once she was fully atop the solid rock, she lifted her hands to her damp hair, running her claws through it briefly to rid it of any knots.

Things were finally starting to look up for the Aston. Her daughters had returned to her, and somehow, they had forgiven her. Océane still didn’t think she was worthy of the title “mom” or “mother”, as she’d practically abandoned them across the continent and planned never to set eyes on them. Yet, now that they were here, she hoped she could fix and grow her less-than-sufficient maternal instincts. Apparently, she’d never learned such a virtue from Tayui, even though the Aston’s own mother had been a perfect parental figure. Her short attention span was probably to blame for that.

Spring was nearly here, too. She could feel it in her bones, and a spring fever had clearly settled over her. It would be a while yet before the rest of the snow melted, but there were telltale signs of the coming season. Small buds that had pressed from fragile branches of trees, more birdsong filled the air, and the lakes and rivers could flow freely once again without hindrance from ice. Spring had always been her favorite; mother nature awaking from her heavy slumber and the bright kaleidoscope colors that came with it filled her with hope. She’d even tried dancing a little; since Sonnerie she hadn’t moved in any familiar steps of the Cherokee dances, but with spring upon them she’d tried again, and realized how much she still loved to dance. She’d even set her sights on climbing higher in the AniWayan ranks; perhaps reach her master tier as she’d always promised herself she would.

In light of the peace she’d found, a hummed tune fell from her muzzle as she braided either edge of her hair, pulling the two together to a tie at the back. With the sun her locks had begun to dry, a familiar kinked pattern falling down her back in a cataract of dark chocolate. Once she’d finished pulling the edges of hair away from her face, she lifted a large and fine bluejay feather and tucked it behind her ear, tail gliding happily along the warm stone. Maybe everything would be alright.
Last edited by Florina Soul on Fri Aug 15, 2014 12:48 pm, edited 5 times in total.
Reason: m-tag

User avatar
Ann
Luperci the rules of paradise are never nice
I want your fears, your hopes
the whole kaleidoscope

POSTED: Mon Apr 14, 2014 5:09 pm

OOC: Gah, you made me write a book again! xD (+700)

Everything was far from alright. What the hell was he even doing here? Dom was not a tribesman, a spiritualist, not even built for pack life to begin with. He couldn’t keep skulking about and avoiding social situations forever – sooner or later AniWaya would call him on it and demand that he pitch in or get kicked out. He was torn, though. He needed to know the truth about what he heard, but he wasn’t ready. He couldn’t bear to walk away from this, the only chance he had left, but if it was true, could he commit to this place? He didn’t deserve a family, and he would only ruin this one, and damn did he wish he had a drink right now.

Daybreak had already lightened the sky overhead. He needed to get up and face the day, no matter what it brought him. Dom groaned into his hands before reluctantly rising. He tied the headscarf around his curly mane, cinching the knot firmly. His lanky body ached in protest as he stretched, readying for a morning run despite the sleepless night of worrying. His scars were healed now, taut and shiny-pink against his fur, and muscle weight was slowly returning to his gaunt frame. He was not the ghastly specter he had been after being left for dead, but the haunted look in his pale eyes remained. He still could not cope with the losses, could not even acknowledge them, and so his emotional scars would take much longer to recover from, if ever.

The wolfdog jogged quietly along the largely unfamiliar terrain, his pace slow as he recounted what drew him here. Ocèane found him injured, and left him bandages. He had followed her to make sure she was safe. It was over between them, they both knew that – Dom could no longer give his heart away so freely, it was much too fragile now. It was only sentiment that brought him to the borders of her homeland; he had never expected the secret she had hidden from him. Now he didn’t know what he was hoping for by joining this pack. Was he so desperate for love that he would ingratiate himself into a family that clearly had no desire for him, and might not even be his? How pitiful, and yet he couldn’t deny it. It was too soon after—

The Ayastigi halted. Ocèane’s scent was strong in the air; she was close, though he hadn’t seen her. He wondered if she was avoiding him on purpose, or if her brother had not told her Domovoi was one of their own now. A spark of anger kindled in his chest, and his hackles rose. She had lied to him, or at least withheld a damn big secret. He was about to surge forward and confront her when he abruptly realized why he had not spotted her yet: she was bathing in the lake.

A peculiar expression crossed his face -- a mixture of embarrassment and fascination -- as he watched the tall wolf stride confidently to the shore, dark coat glistening with water as it clung to her dancer’s curves. He remained frozen as the Aston female dropped low to shake herself off, then rose to glide into the surrounding tree line, oblivious to her audience. Dom cleared his throat awkwardly. It took him a long moment to shake off his slack-jawed surprise. Ocèane kept throwing him for a loop, but thankfully she hadn’t seen him just now, or that confrontation might have gone down differently.

He was still angry at her, although there were a lot of complicated other feelings he didn’t want to entertain. The anger felt good. He had a right to know, and she had not told him; anger would focus him. He plunged after her wet footprints, carelessly trampling undergrowth and making noise in his haste. He couldn’t be distracted by her, he had to keep the anger running hot. He was flushed from his run, heart pounding -- now was the time to get this over with. He couldn't avoid her forever.

"Oce-" he bellowed through the trees, bursting into the warm sunlight of the clearing. Dom stood, chest heaving as he panted, staring hard at the native AniWayan perched atop the stone. “We need to talk,” he growled before she could protest.


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Miyu
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I'LL SAVE YOUR BONES

POSTED: Wed Apr 16, 2014 11:19 pm


((544)) ooc. Yesss Miyu books are the best books c|

Of course, there was that little thing called Murphy’s Law. It always seemed to find her somehow, some way. For instance, when she’d returned to AniWaya several years ago from another of her long adventures, she’d expected for a happy reunion with her family. She could see Tayui, Claudius, Attila, and Noir; she expected all of them to be there with open arms. But just as she was teetering on the edge of holding the state in complete content, it fell apart. Noir had been murdered by their unstable father, Tayui was gone, and Attila and Claudius were stricken with grief, shells of their former selves. It had happened again, recently; she’d finally settled back into home, when her former mistakes and flaws all came back to her in a flurry of painful complications, the small figures of her children.

And, for instance, there was today.

As she hummed, she relished the warm stone beneath her that aided in drying her thick fur and only flooded her bones with spring ecstasy. It was a new tune she’d picked up, eavesdropping on her most recent adventure on a curious loner’s camp. Light and warm, it had the element of rich and good things to come. She was not paying attention to her surroundings, why should she? All that she needed was the sun and the earth. Her fingers worked deftly and skillfully to tie two slim braids at the back of her head in a halo of her own hair, the bright blue jay feathers that she added giving the essence that she was a flower child risen from the reviving earth. It was about this time that she heard a voice. It was low, angry, and all too familiar.

Slowly, Océane opened her eyes, and the realization was slow to hit her. When it finally did, her small and peaceful world that she had begun to build up around herself crashed in a brilliant array of shattering prospects and hopes. Her kaleidoscope had been broken, and she now feared she wouldn’t be able to mend it.

She sat there, for a while. She wasn’t quite sure if it was seconds, minutes, or hours. But eventually, she dropped the braided hair she had been holding with her arms above her head, lowering her hands uncannily steadily. She stared, her face unreadable, while in her mind everything was crumbling to ruins. “Domovoi,” And the name was what broke her stoic reaction, her delicate perch on the stone abandoned. She was suddenly standing on the ground instead of sitting on her beautiful stone, bent forward, a bird ready to fly. She wished she really could fly. She would fly across the ocean, and then some- just to get away from here. Ears tucked far back to mingle with her hair, she took a hitched breath, slowly extending her hands from her sides, balling them into fists far away from her. “What are you doing here?” She barked, though it was soft. Her gaze flittered unsteadily from the man’s form to the trees nearby, as if checking to see if they would be spotted or heard. “This isn’t Sonnerie. You can’t ignore pack borders.” Oce spoke levelly and clearly, voice hushed and unsteady.
Océane Aston

User avatar
Ann
Luperci the rules of paradise are never nice
I want your fears, your hopes
the whole kaleidoscope

POSTED: Wed Jun 18, 2014 12:22 pm

OOC: aw snap (+300)

He stood breathing heavily from sprinting after her through the woods, and scowled in impatience. They kept meeting in the most awkward ways. It would have been amusing to him if he didn't feel such a clawing pressure in his chest every time he looked at her, something he could barely contain without bursting. Frosty eyes narrowed into a glower. Focus on the anger and nothing else.

Dom had thought Ocèane might be avoiding him on purpose, but the shock stamped all over her features betrayed her genuine ignorance. She really didn't know he had come after her. Maybe she didn't know him as well as she thought, Dom mused bitterly. She was frozen for a long moment, and he thought he caught a glimmer of horror in those startled seafoam eyes. Of course she didn't want him to be there – not when she had something to hide.

The dancer slipped gracefully from her perch, her voice hushed as she tentatively spoke. Dom's long face contorted visibly at the mention of Sonnerie, but he shook his head quickly, brushing it aside.

"Your brother let me in," the wolfdog growled, and flung his arms wide as though daring her to challenge the fact. He was stronger and fitter than he had been during their last encounter – more capable of holding his own. The emotional scarring ran deeper than ever, but he would not quiver and collapse under the weight of her presence. No longer could she "blow on him and make him fall over". He wasn't going to let her go.

"He told me something interesting that you neglected to mention when you were running." His plumed tail lashed quickly as hot words tumbled from his lips. His heart was hammering, throat tightening into a choke. He had to know. He deserved to know. He didn't want to know.

"Oce, are they mine?"


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I'LL SAVE YOUR BONES

POSTED: Sat Jun 21, 2014 8:20 pm

((519)) ooc. This reply sucks and makes no sense, im sORry

The longer she stood in Domovoi’s presence, the more Ocèane wished she had wings, or could transform into a bird, or maybe even a tiny bug. She needed a way out. Maybe she could just turn and run. She was quick, and she didn’t think he would be able to catch her; he was still healing from his wounds. But even if she tried to run, she knew she couldn’t. The buzzing energy she’d had moments before had done nothing other than vanished, replaced with a cold pit that was spreading from her core, quicker and quicker, the more that he spoke. The sun did nothing to warm her chocolate fur, and it was all Ocèane could do not to shudder. Her heart climbed to her throat and fluttered there, like a hovering bird, and it hurt to breathe. She was unable to fill her lungs past the halfway point, and so she had the vague feeling she was suffocating. Thoughts crammed her mind, questions and pleas and angry retorts, but none of them could she fully form or speak. She honestly did try, though her reaction to his response wasn’t even a coherent sentence.

“My brother? He… oh.” It became apparent to her addled mind that the words let me in meant more that clearance for a simple visit. Before that information could fully sink in, he was rushing on, words full of a hot fury that made her want to crumble into dust the color of hot chocolate. The wind could carry her away then, and she would scatter, never to be seen again.

The woman had been staring blankly at the Ayastigi’s scarred chest, but at the final question, she rose her eyes to search for the pale blue of his own. She wanted to scream. Why do you care? You were never there. All you cared about was your revenge quest. Another part of her wanted to beg, and plea, and pour out her heart. I’m sorry. It’s my fault. I should have told you. You deserve to know. I was a coward. But she couldn’t muster enough strength to do either of those things. Instead, Ocèane stood still. Once again, she lost track of time in those blue eyes. She guessed it was somewhere around a full minute before she responded. “Yes.”

Speaking that final word broke her steely cold resolve, and she finally did crumble, though not into dust, as she would have liked. The Hineyu managed to sidestep and fall back onto her stone, hair splayed in a dark halo around her head. Ocèane willed the warm rock to seep into her body, her bones, to give her feeling again. But she was numb. The woman stared brokenly at the cloudless, beautiful blue sky, bringing her hands to run past her temples and tangle angrily in her hair. She didn’t shed any tears, because she couldn’t feel anything other than guilt. Maybe that was why she couldn’t breathe; she was suffocating in guilt. “I’m sorry.” That was such a stupid phrase, she thought. Sorry fixed nothing. Maybe Domovoi would leap at her now, and tear at her with his claws, and rip her heart out of her chest and hold it until it stopped beating. She half hoped he would. He deserved that, and she thought that at least it would stop her from destroying anything else.

Image by Dru @ Flickr
Océane Aston

User avatar
Ann
Luperci the rules of paradise are never nice
I want your fears, your hopes
the whole kaleidoscope

POSTED: Mon Jun 30, 2014 1:54 am

OOC: had to m-tag this because dom really cant watch his language! also minor PP, lemme know if I should change? (+400)

She was too calm. Dom was shaking as he waited for her answer, blood roaring in his ears as his heart pounded. He couldn't break away from her gaze, which was somehow melancholic, accusatory, searching all at once. She seemed so reserved, whereas he vibrated from tension, close to falling apart. The Aston female held too much sway over him – it frustrated him that he could not hold a simple conversation with her without wanting to resort to violence. This was a mistake. He needed more time to let his heart heal before—

"…'the fuck, Ocèane?!"

The hoarse scream tore from his throat. Birds were startled from a nearby tree and noisily took flight. She faded after her answer, slumping back against the stone with her hands in her hair. Energy fled from her limp form, whereas Domovoi blazed with the emotion she'd sparked. He lunged forward without thinking, and slammed his palms against the rock face on either side of her. She was trapped between his arms, and he would not feel sorry for her, would not allow her to look anywhere other than at him.

"What do you mean, 'sorry'?! Why didn't you tell me? You didn't think to fuckin' tell me back then? Is that why you left me? Shit! I would've –!"

He bit his lip abruptly, cutting his words off with the sharp taste of blood. What would he have done? Stayed with her in Sonnerie? It had been too late for that – he burned all his bridges there, and his mind had been solely focused on retrieving his siblings from Kharma. When she left – she was pregnant? Pain flashed across his gaze at the memory, and he struggled not to look away. Kharma had been absent for the first months of his children's lives, and Domovoi had hated him for his futile attempt to make up for lost time. He was no father.

He let out a wordless cry of frustration, his voice strangled with emotion. How could he have ever found himself in the same situation? He had been so careful – Desperation quickened his pulse, his ragged breathing. She was close enough to touch, but he did not dare. In a lower tone, he panted, "No. They can't be mine. I- I would've known. You wouldn't really hide that from me. You knew I wanted…"

Then he did look away, one hand clamped over his mouth. This was too much. His eyes were wide, glassy, staring into nothing as he struggled to pull thoughts together. It was hard enough to imagine Ocèane as a parent without the knowledge that he was now one too. That, or she was lying to him again.


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Miyu
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POSTED: Sun Jul 06, 2014 5:51 pm

((777)) ooc. No worries! AnD she should really lay down or something because this sounds partially insane oops

She’d scarcely had time to begin and gather her thoughts before they fled like the crows startled from the tree. She was suddenly trapped between his arms like a frightened bird in a cage, and she let out a startled, strangled cry, that quickly died into silence. What had she been about to say? To explain? There was no explaining. She’d left him, pregnant with his child, without giving him even a hint to it. It was solely her fault. She was sure she’d had something important to say, she was sure she could find a way to at least bring him away from the hate he was undoubtedly feeling, but it was gone. Now she was forced to face him, much too close, and her breathing turned uneven, hitched, and ragged. When he screamed more senseless and confusing words, her sea-green eyes became pained, as they would had she been struck across the face.

Slowly, Océane could see him trying to work through his thoughts, most likely muddled together with rage and hurt. She couldn’t watch the hurt in his eyes, or it would disarm her completely. So she closed her eyes tightly, falling into sweet darkness. She tried to organize her different emotions and thoughts into neat little lines. It was hard, so impossibly hard, with him so near and her heart beating so unevenly, like a weakening bird trying to stay in the sky. Had she really begun to feel like all of her problems were being solved? That would have been a silly little lie to herself. Nothing would have been solved, because there would have always been some small part of her mind that carried the eternal guilt; she had hidden these things from Domovoi. Now the Hineyu was forced to face them much too head-on, when she hadn’t even been able to imagine how such a conversation would have gone. Certainly not like this, not like this.

When Océane opened her eyes again, Dom’s eyes were gone, his face turned off at an uncertain angle, hand over his mouth like he could stop the accusations and outbursts falling from his tongue. Before she really knew what she was doing, she set her hands on his scarred chest, gently pushing him back. She didn’t expect him to refuse the gesture, she only knew if he stayed so close she would certainly break into nothing, or at the very least, cry. When she removed her hands from him, they became cold, unsteady where they had been so certain on his fur. The Aston took a deep breath, closing her eyes for the count of twenty, though she was sure she had missed or skipped some numbers; that was how jumbled her mind was. “Stop,” Océane had meant for it to be firm, demanding, even, but the word came out as a whisper. “Just stop, please.” She’d meant to say something else, but she’d forgotten again. Instead she just stared at her hands, which lay dejectedly in her lap. When had she sat up, crossed her legs? She couldn’t remember. It took her a long time to raise her gaze to her old friend’s, and when she did, her eyes were unnaturally bright, as though stricken with fever. Words came, at long last, though they were more of a plea than an explanation. “I’m sorry, alright? I made a mistake. A big one. One I’ll be paying off forever. I didn’t… I…” And then they spilled, words and thoughts she’d had lodged in her heart like chips of ice. “I left them, you know. For years. They grew up without me. I came back, trying to forget it all. That was stupid. They found me, because they wanted a mother. A real one. I can’t be a mother. I’m terrible at it. I was even terrible at loving you, wasn’t I?” A senseless laugh bubbled from her mouth, one she quickly cut short when she realized she probably sounded insane. She then looked away, examining a long bluejay feather she must have pulled from her hair at some point in time. She couldn’t even remember simple actions, so how could she be sure she would remember what she was saying? “They’re beautiful, really. Olivia was cursed with my terrible curiosity, I’m afraid. And Amorette, she… I’m afraid she’ll get her heart broken, too. I can’t protect them. They should have stayed in Lac Sakami. I’ll just hurt them.” The Hineyu leaned forward with her elbows on her knees, cradling her head in her hands dejectedly. What had she just said? She couldn’t remember. Hopefully it hadn’t sounded stupid.

Image by Dru @ Flickr
Océane Aston

User avatar
Ann
Luperci the rules of paradise are never nice
I want your fears, your hopes
the whole kaleidoscope

POSTED: Fri Aug 15, 2014 6:38 pm

OOC: ending for you~~ lemme know when we can have another? ;__; this thread mannn (+500)

Sudden warmth blossomed against his chest. Glassy eyes blinked, seeking to focus through the haze. Her hands were on him, pushing, and he stumbled obediently backward as she bid him to. She was never really trapped, not with the power she held over him. His anger had burned out, as much as he'd struggled to hold onto it, and a hollow emptiness filled the void instead.

Her hands withdrew, and he made a small noise, longing for the familiar contact to continue. He did not know what to feel, only that it was overwhelming him. It was not the situation he had been so swift to assume it was — she had not turned him into Kharma by cutting him out of her life. Ocèane had not wanted to be a parent at all. Maybe that was the reason she left him behind — because he would have wanted a family with someone as special as her.

"They didn't have a mother or a father...?" he murmured weakly, mostly to try and process. "I thought... I was pissed because you didn't want me around to screw 'em up. Thought you hid 'em because you were... too good for me..." Dom managed to meet her stricken gaze and found it painfully beautiful. He swallowed audibly as he listened to her confession — but it wasn't until she mentioned loving him that he began to cry in earnest.

He buried his long nose in the crook of his elbow, shoulders hitching with each muffled sob. "Don't say that," he growled through tears. He could barely make out the huddled shape of the Aston cradling her face, and he took an unsteady step away from her. If he reached out to her in comfort, she would break his heart all over again. He had to get away. The dam was breaking, and he still cared too much for her. He would fall to pieces.

"I fucked up way worse than you, so don't... don't say shit like that. I'll..." Dom's voice broke, and he quickly scrubbed at his damp cheeks with a fist. It didn't help. He wanted to confess all the terrible things he'd done since she left him, but he couldn't bare his damaged soul, he had to protect himself from her. She was afraid she would hurt her daughters, but at least they were alive. She was still too pure to have the darkness that he did, no matter what she thought.

"Oce, I'll be around. I'm... staying," he choked out. Olivia and Amorette were their names. He wanted to know them. He couldn't trust the glimmer of hope that he could have family. It would be too crushing to learn he had been lied to. But neither could he leave. It was a struggle to even draw breath, but he spoke again, clutching at his face as he did so.

"I'll protect them... but I won't get in your way. Je te promets."

They were Ocèane's girls, however she chose to deal with how she wronged them. He had followed her here on impulse; he had no plans, no desires. She did not need to fear his presence now that she knew he was AniWayan. The tall wolfdog teetered unsteadily on his feet. He managed to turn his back on the wolf and walk away with great effort. He could not, however, stop sobbing.


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Miyu
Luperci
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I'LL SAVE YOUR BONES

POSTED: Mon Aug 18, 2014 11:00 pm

((427)) ooc. oh god feelings. And yess, definitely tell me when you're available for another one. <33

Ocèane had only cried a handful of times in her life. She’d built up a sturdy wall between herself and any emotion that came with tears; she’d thought it was solid as rock. In times of distress, she would most usually sink into a state of numbness. She would not cry, she would not scream, she would not express on her exterior the turmoil that was taking place on her interior. When she’d heard her sister had been murdered, the wall had broken, and she had wept. But the Aston had built it up even stronger, and was true to her word when she said she hadn’t cried for years. She had not yet experienced anything that would break her enough to punch a hole through that wall; she was whole.

The wall cracked more every moment she remained in Domovoi’s presence.

She had briefly steeled herself for this encounter; sure she could choke out the truth and watch him walk away without any chip in her self-resolve. She had always been so composed, she had always been so strong. But she had been wrong. She had been oh, so wrong. When he uttered his promise, the wall shattered completely, into small bits she could never again hope to repair. “Wait.” She choked up the word, reaching forward to grab him by a wrist or an arm, but he was already gone from her. The inner turmoil she’d been so determined to keep concealed bubbled over the lid, and tears spilled hot down her cheeks. Ocèane made no effort to stop them. She didn’t heave sobs or struggle for breathe; she was both numb and broken. He’d cracked her. Nobody could crack her.

Why did he think she was still so pure? Could he not see past her pretty face and into the darkness she’d harbored? He instantly flipped everything to pin the blame on himself. She could smell the alcohol on his breath, she could sense the blood he may have spilled. But he failed to see that it was she who had wronged him. Maybe if she had stayed, she could have kept the beautiful man with his smile and bright eyes. This was her mistake, her wrongdoing, and he managed to find blame in himself where there was none. Ocèane had begged, and borrowed, and stolen; she’d stolen his children. She continued to watch numbly as his figure finally vanished, unable to fully comprehend what she’d just set into motion. What if she didn’t want him to stay out of her way?

Image by Dru @ Flickr
Océane Aston

User avatar
Ann
Luperci the rules of paradise are never nice
I want your fears, your hopes
the whole kaleidoscope

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