the spark in my heart - Printable Version +- 'Souls IPB Archive (November 2007–October 2012) (https://soulsrpg.com/ipb) +-- Forum: Dead IC (https://soulsrpg.com/ipb/forumdisplay.php?fid=110) +--- Forum: Dead Topics (https://soulsrpg.com/ipb/forumdisplay.php?fid=21) +--- Thread: the spark in my heart (/showthread.php?tid=3497) Pages:
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- Pendzez Zazkex - 09-12-2008 OOC: WC: 551 This is an All Welcome post, so feel free to join. IC: The morning was starting, with the sun normally rising in the east. It just peaked the top of it's head above the mountains that were in the east. Pendzez walked along a pathway that was present, looking at other paths that cut from the main path to the different houses and dens that were there. He then turned his attention to the sunrise in the east. He saw it was just showing itself. He looked to the west, and saw that the mountains there were hit by the light from the rising sun. It was sort of an orangey color, like it was on fire, but not literally. If the sun was like that, then mabye some of the wolves were not awake yet. Pendzez didn't mind though. He thought it was still early for them anyway, but not him. He was usually up at this time, besides he was used to it. There were some days he would wake up early, some when he got up late, or there were days that he wouldn't sleep at all. Those sleepless days were due to the bad memories, or sometimes an exciting moment. On some nights, he would go to early, or late. Which ever it was, he would get some sleep. That's what mattered to him about sleep. As long as he got some sleep. Turning back to the path ahead of him, he looked around him, seeing if there any wolves awake. Only some. Pendzez just wanted to know if there any awake yet. He didn't want to disturb them because they might be busy doing something. Pendzez continued to walk along the path, not thinking to interrupt the awake wolves with there current duties, or jobs, or morning hobbies. He continues walking until he came to a stop. Walking along was now getting boring. He turned to the direction of a paddock that was there. He looked at the cattle that were grazing on the soft green grassy pasture. In another paddock next to the first paddock, there were herders that were moving other cattle into a different paddock. He watched them do their jobs. Now, herders would have to get up early to move some cattle around to different paddocks. They would have to get up even more early than the current time of the morning. They would have to milk them as a job because that's what some herders do, they harvest the cattle milk. Pendzez sat there watching the many fields there were presented in his eyes. The absolute beauty by looking at them almost took over his body, but he had a good immunization to it. He always had from when he was born. One of the herders, a young male herder, was closing the gate so the cattle wouldn't get out. Pendzez had his attention for the moment and saw the male wave to him. Pendzez lifted up his right arm and waved back. He had to be nice, he didn't want to be rude and ignore him, he had to be nice and polite, well, he was always like that. He will always be like that. He just doesn't want to be a bad wolf and get kicked out, that would be the last thing in the entire world he wanted to happen. - Jefferson Soul - 09-12-2008 [html]
- Pendzez Zazkex - 09-12-2008 WC: 585 The sun rose more, lighting up more of the mountains in the west. Somehow Pendzez found this a peaceful tranquility, better than yesterdays when he met Deuce. It seemed to get his mind out of bad memories. Now, he wasn't even sure if he had bad memories. This peacefulness made him go into his mind, despite him looking ahead, to see the goodness there was in his past memories. He had remembered some things that he found pleasant, like the time his dad taught him how to hunt and when he first became an older brother. He went deeper and deeper, but then he came to a black and dark part of his mind, the bad memories. He didn't want to see them because he saw them many times before and not again now. Pendzez shook himself out of his mind of memories, both good and bad, and returned to the real world which he was born in. In his eyes he was afraid to enter the dark part of his mind. He just didn't want to see them again. He's been trying to forget them for a long time, but yesterday when Deuce asked if he had family, his bad memories surfaced from the part he was forgetting, making his remember the flashes of his parents and his sister dead. Now, he was trying to forget them again, though he does have little flashes now. In time, he will completely for get them, and continue on with his life. That's what his parents would have wanted anyway. A normal life for there only son. He left his mind to return to watching the herders move the cattle around and the cattle grazing. Watching them made him think of food. He was a bit hungry afterall. He didn't even think of what to have to eat, but there was probably something the whole pack does for food in the morning together. He didn't mind waiting to find out what. During from now to then, he had to find something to do, but what? Now that he was in a pack, mabye he had to hunt like they do and not like his former loner self. He thought he had to obey the pack rules, and not leave the area without permission, well, he is still young, so mabye he had too anyway. Pendzez just didn't know what to do about this situation, but he thought not to worry about it. He should be fine about following the pack rules. Pendzez heard a voice, however, it was a light voice, but a voice none the less. He didn't know what it said, but he thought it was a "Good morning." He turned around and saw another wolf, actually a hybrid, lying under a tree that was near, chewing on a stick. Pendzez found it odd about what the hybrid was doing, but mabye it was a habit of this hybrid. Pendzez didn't want to be rude and ignore what the hybrid said, so like a kind wolf he was, he gave a light smile and said, "Well, I guess someone likes the sunrise in the morning. I do, but mainly because I'm up very early in the morning." The amount of sleep Pendzez gets doesn't really matter to him, even if it's just an hour's worth. However, he doesn't seem tired when he sleeps for like two to six hours. This doesn't trouble him at all. Mabye because he was used to it. It's a mystery. - Jefferson Soul - 09-14-2008 [html]
- Pendzez Zazkex - 09-16-2008 WC: 356 "I don't know how you do it, then," that's what the hybrid said. The way that it was said was like he wasn't liking the morning. Probably not this early morning. "Couldn't be a morning person even if I tried. Use the time to your advantage since some of us can't." is what the Jefferson continued. Mabye he was just one of those later risers. Why doesn't he go back to sleep until the sun is completely out and shining bright. Pendzez wouldn't mind that, but once he's up, he's up. He can't get back to sleep. This wasn't a problem to Pendzez, but there were times that would get tired in the middle of the day and sleep. Hopefully, this problem wouldn't interrupt his help with the pack. If it does, then he was in trouble. However, he found ways to stay awake. He never tells anyone because it was kind of a secret that was only for him to know. There were times that other wolves asked him if he was tired, and he would say, "A liitle, but I'm ok." Pendzez was a tough wolf in his family. He gets it from his father, who was a brave warrior. "Where on earth are you going this early, anyway? What does this pack have to offer that could get you up and smiling at this stupid hour?" Was Jefferson angry with Pendzez about this? Or is he just frustrated about being up early in the morning? Pendzez didn't mind to rise early. "I just get up early sometimes, that's all. The pack doesn't have anything to offer. I just joined the pack to have you know. And just because you're tired doesn't mean you can get snappy!" Pendzez sort of yelled at Jefferson. Was it because of being tired? Or because he doesn't like being talked to like that. Pendzez wasn't happy about this, certainly. He doesn't like being grouched at, especially from someone he just met. When he found it worthy for forgiveness, he just apologized, "I'm sorry I said that in that tone. I just don't like being talked to like that." - Jefferson Soul - 09-16-2008 [html]
- Pendzez Zazkex - 09-19-2008 WC: 419 Sorry about that. I saw it like that, but I guess it wasn't. I sometimes see things as something else. This fury was odd. Pendzez never got like this before. He felt a slight pain in his head, getting worse and worse, like something was trying to get out, eating though his skull and out of the head. Could this have been the cause of his furious reaction? Of all the pains and reactions he had in the past, he never had this before. He did what he could to resist and withdraw that pain. He eventually did, but he still couldn't see that the pain was the cause of his outburst. He shook it out of mind, trying not to let Jefferson see it. Pendzez still had his mind on the pain, however. The thought couldn't leave his mind. He still couldn't see why it would have cause his outburst to the hybrid. Mabye it was just because of his early rise, but now that he was in a pack, he would have to obey the rules, which could be getting up at the crack of dawn to hunt. Even so, he still had much to learn about pack life, especially now that he was no longer a loner. Going through pack life might be difficult afterall. Pendzez never thought of that. He asked his parents about packs, but they said they didn't know much about it. That wasn't much help. "Grow up, I've been a loner for longer than you've been living, kid, and even I know how the pack is supposed to run. Watch your tongue--words like that will have you shredded and deserted in no time. I'm not afraid of you. But packlife means you have to live and let live, and figure out your mates live--or talk. Don't apologize to me... save it for when you explode on the leaders." Jefferson had a point. If he was going to last a life time, he would have to do what the pack says. No objections. Pendzez saw this pup's play, but he might have a lot more on his back than he thought. With the hybrid's reply, the snow white wolf had to explain about his furious reaction to Jefferson. He didn't want to insult Jefferson in any way, mabye what he would say may even let Jefferson despise Pendzez. Pendzez thought for a moment, then came up with something. "How about... we start from scratch? Hello, I'm Pendzez." Pendzez stared at the hybrid, hoping that he got the hint and would go along with it. If not, then well, Pendzez was screwed. - Jefferson Soul - 09-19-2008 [html]
- Pendzez Zazkex - 09-20-2008 WC: 466 ^^ "Jefferson. You're getting it now. I only guessed that you were new to the pack, but I guess I wasn't too far off. I'm only a few days old here as well." Well, Pendzez was quite glad that Jefferson was doing what Pendzez was hoping would happen. He wanted to start the conversation again from scratch, so he got that. As far as he knows, the fury reaction never happened. Pendzez was also happy that he was getting on well with a new pack member, one that was also new to the pack. He was hoping something like this would happen and so it did. However, Jefferson was here a few days londer than Pendzez. The snow white wolf joined just yesterday, but by the way Jefferson explained, it was obvious that he was around longer than Pendzez has. Pendzez didn't feel uneasy at this at all. He thought that mabye could show him some things about packs, but the again, mabye not. He wasn't here for every long, so he probably wouldn't be of much help. "Oh, thanks. Yeah I joined Phoenix Valley Pack yesterday afternoon, so I wasn't here for long. To tell you the truth, I'm quite glad that I'm in a pack that I can stay in. When I was a loner, there were some packs that would let me stay for a certain amount of days, but Esper Hollow let me stay for as long as I want. There and here aswell." The snow white wolf was getting cheerful and glad even more. He had to calm down before he would go silly. "You seem a little young to be wandering around by yourself, lost your family?" Well, Pendzez thought he was young, but he's been a loner before a pack member, so he should know how to defend himself. Besides, his father taught him the many ways of protection. Koexar told Pendzez that what he will teach him will be effective when it came to hunts, ambushes, and defending. But Pendzez mind went black like it was yesterday. He heard that word again. Family. Pendzez was hoping to forget that word forever because each time he hears that word, his soul goes dark and locked away. The snow white wolf looked at Jefferson, not saying anything to comment him about his question. He looked away for a few moments before turning back the hybrid with his answer. When the moments were gone, he turned to Jefferson and said, "Yep, they're dead. My mum, my dad, and my sister." Pendzez felt more uneasy each time he thought of something to say about his family. It wouldn't matter who it was, he would find it hard to say what he wanted to say. "I don't want to talk about anymore of it." - Jefferson Soul - 09-21-2008 [html]
- Pendzez Zazkex - 09-23-2008 WC: 459 "Fine, fine, don't start crying," Crying? Why would Pendzez start crying over a matter that was in the past. He was starting to get over it, trying to avoid the subject about his parents that is. Now that he was in a pack, he would have to get used to start talking about his parents and his other family. Jefferson seemed to be trying to help Pendzez, but in an odd way that Pendzez didn't understand. The snow white wolf thought about it, but nothing came to mind that might help understand about the support, but was it really support from Jefferson? Or was it just some random words? Either way, Pendzez didn't mind at all, as long that he would find it helpful. It was too bad that his parents aren't alive because they would tell what the hybrid was trying to say. "Never said I would cry. I'm going to have to get used to people asking me about them, however, becasue I can't keep running from the past. If I do, then I'll be out before I would say but." That was true. If Pendzez was going to let his past get in the way, he would be out of the pack. "Just a passing thought, is all. No need to get defensive or snappy again. You said your name was what, ...'Pendzez'?" Pendzez never felt that urge to get snappy or upset. If he did, however, then he would. The name was correct, or at least the last time Pendzez checked. "Yeah, ok. Pendzez is my name. Handpicked from my parents, may they rest in peace, very carefully." The name 'Pendzez' was a common name, but a rare meaning. Some see Pendzez as a snow child at first glance, but find that he is just a common wolf among a pack. The snow white wolf wondered by what the meaning of the his name meant, but he couldn't quite put his paw on it. "It means 'Child of the Snowy Tundra.' I know, it sounds wierd, but that's what my father said it meant. The Child of the Snowy Winter was indeed an odd meaning for his name. Pendzez kept asking himself what it meant by that, but he copuldn't figure it out. When he asked his father about what the meaning of his name meant, all he said was he was born in a snowy tundra, durning the cold winter season. Pendzez found that odd because he was born a loner, he didn't remember going through any tundra when just a pup. It was what his father said, so mabye it was true. "I asked him what it meant, he says it meant I was born in a snowy tundra during a snowy winter." - Jefferson Soul - 09-23-2008 [html]
- Pendzez Zazkex - 09-24-2008 WC: 504 They're getting quite well, I must say. ^^ "Atta boy, keep that up and you'll be all grown up soon enough." Pendzez was learning, though it will take time. He will eventually get there, if he tries hard enough. Though the snow white wolf was a slow learner, he would try to obtain this goal to help him with pack life. There were things that Pendzez could do around the place, but it was the matter of what. Mabye some voluntary stuff. If it meant building for the future ahead, the Pendzez would be willing to help shaping it up. "Thanks for that. Hopefully, not too soon." Pendzez didn't want to grow up now, but mabye when he was ready to. If it was to happen suddenly like that, well Pendzez would be out of whack about predictions. That would be the last Pendzez would want. There was an itch on his left ear. Pendzez got in position and sratched it with his leg, trying to relief it. Once relieved, he returned his attention to the hybrid. "What about you? Did you have family?" Pendzez was filled with curiosity because Jeffers asked about his parents, so why not ask about his? "Good name. Appropriate, fits your personality. Sounds smart. Strong. Let it stick with you." Pendzez felt glad that Jefferson was saying that it was a good meaning for name like Pendzez's. The snow white wolf always wondered if his parents did well to name him, suppose they did do a great job, actually. Pendzez did ask his mum. She said that another word for child was prince. Prince of the Snowy Tundra? Yeah right. Pendzez felt more like a common wolf than a prince. "Thanks for that. My mum says another word for child was prince. I mean Prince of the Snowy Tundra? Hardly." Pendzez smirked at his words to Jefferson. Pendzez wouldn't believe that his name meant Prince of the Snowy Tundra even if it gave him a back scratch. Mabye his mother had knowledge of this because she was born in a tundra, but mabye not. Mabye all she said was something to get Pendzez cheerful and happy. Pendzez had no thought on these for long, for he returned to the real world, fixing his attention back on Jeffers. "Anyway, I will leave it sticking to me. I don't think it will come off," he said sarcastically Pendzez had a thought going through his head. If Jeffers was a few days old, then he was a loner. Mabye Pendzez could learn what Jefferson learned in the wilderness of 'Souls. Pendzez, despite knowing what he learnt himself, had to learn more about a loner's life because he might become one again. "So, I guess you were a loner before? How did you survive?" This filled the snow white wolf with curiosity. Pendzez wanted to know, so he asked politely. If Jeffers was able to shed some light on other survival tips, then mabye Pendzez could use them when in the wilderness again. For now, all Pendzez could do was ask. - Jefferson Soul - 09-24-2008 [html]
- Pendzez Zazkex - 09-26-2008 [html] http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j40/k ... _Table.png); background-position: top center; background-repeat: no-repeat;"> OOC: The Child Of The Tundra is here WC: 503 IC: HEAR HIS CRY "I don't have family. Or if I do, they're not anywhere around here. Not sure who the hell they are or where they've been either, but I've never come across them." Was Jeffer an orphan? Pendzez would know the feeling of being one. He was one, but not anymore. Pendzez has survived two months alone, so mabye he can live alone, well not technically alone. "So, you were an orphan?" That had to be it, the way Jefferson explained it. If he didn't have family, and if he did, he didn't know them, then he had to be an orphan. That's what Pendzez came up with, but it was all on the Hybrid's answer. "Be grateful for your blood, kid... Especially when you have memories of them." Pendzez is next in line of the Zazkex generation. It was planned the creator of all, and go as planned it shall be. No exceptions, unless he was a god. Pendzez had his life planned out when he was made by the Creator. "Well, that's the whole plan, to live and die." Pendzez boldly said these words to Jeffers. "Jefferson? Not my name. Hell if I know what it is. I saw that one somewhere and I couldn't remember being called anything else, so it stuck." Pendzez had that in his mind, but he could only make out only some of that. Sometimes, he would hear words or speeches that he can't understand or has a hard time to think of what it means. If Jefferson wasn't his name, then what was? "Ok, I think I have the gist of what you said," Pendzez said, trying to understand more of the concept. "I got assaulted a couple times over and took too many knocks on the noggin, understand? That's how I survived. I ran into every damn pissed off pisser that was in the area and all his buds, and let's just say talking didn't work well." Pendzez stood amazed. Jeffers obviously got into more trouble than Pendzez did. Pendzez got into a quarrel with a rogue wolf, which left him a scar on his muzzle. The snow white wolf had a revenge swipe, which left a scar on the rogue's left eye. Pendzez was lucky that the rogue had enough and left. If he stayed, Pendzez probably wouldn't be there talking to the Hybrid. Mabye luck was on his side. "I got into a fight with a rogue wolf and ah...Well long story short, he gave me this scar," said Pendzez as he turned his head to show Jeffers his scar. "It's an eat-or-be-eaten world out there. If you lose your leg or your eye, you have to figure out how to keep up with those who haven't. Keep close to your packmates and you'll keep all your limbs." Pendzez agreed with the hybrid about that. If he makes a wrong move, he could be lunch for the birds. Pendzez nodded his head at Jeffers to show that he agreed with him about the matter. - Jefferson Soul - 10-02-2008 [html]
- Pendzez Zazkex - 10-13-2008 [html] http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j40/k ... _Table.png); background-position: top center; background-repeat: no-repeat;"> WC:247 "I don't really care what happened to them or where they are. They could be alive or dead. I've never needed them; I don't give a damn." That was unexpected. Pendzez thought that the hybrid would at least say that he had good parents that raised him well, but the way he spoke, it sounded like he hated them. This didn't upset the snow white wolf, but it did make him uneasy. Upon the wolves he met so far, he never heard of anyone saying that they didn't care about his parents. "Bummer." Bummer? That's all Pendzez could come up with? Pendzez said just that simple word without even thinking. That was wierd. "Live and die. That's been the plan for most people, save the couple out there who consider killing and murder a way of life. It's more than that; I pity you for such a mindset. Develop something new, kid, and I don't mean scars. You've been living for a year now, yeah? Figure out what means most to you, and live for it." Ignoring the concept of not crying, Pendzez didn't understand what Jeffer meant about mindset. Not only that, but also the idea of finding something that important to himself and live for it. Pendzez didn't what there was. He doesn't have a family, or mate. What was he going to live for? "Finding something important and living for it? Easier said than done. I don't have anything, or anyone worth living for." - Jefferson Soul - 10-16-2008 [html]
- Pendzez Zazkex - 10-18-2008 [html] http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j40/k ... _Table.png); background-position: top center; background-repeat: no-repeat;"> WC: 344 "Listen to me, you wide-eyed whelp: I didn't spend two-and-a-half years meandering around the wilderness to hear someone perfectly healthy put me in my place about how to live one's life." Pendzez was just opening his mouth to continue what he was going to add on the living for subject, until the hybrid just snapped out in anger. Pendzez didn't know if it was something he said, or if he sort of snapped at Jefferson. Pendzez didn't snap in anyway. He was just saying that he had nothing to live. Mabye that was the reason why Jefferson was angry. "Don't you open your pup-yapper and tell me you don't have anything to live for. That's some serious bullshit you're throwing around." Jefferson snapped again. Pendzez was like in silence. He didn't know what to say to Jeffers. This seemed like a real problem. "Keep your yap shut a minute, your four legs are still working. Your eyes are fine. You were brought up well. You found a place to live when you didn't have one before. You never did what I did--live for the moment in time. Don't turn into a sorry old gimp like me, kid. The way you sparked up earlier says your family is important to you--then keep that going. You don't have a family or a mate, is what you're thinking. Then use that. Start living for your own future, damnit. Don't screw up your life wishing you tried." Pendzez remained silent as Jefferson snapped again, this time acting more like a teacher. A very strict teacher. The snow white wolf listened to what the hybrid said, wondering about the subject in question. Pendzez heard that he shouldn't become like Jefferson, a sorry old gimp. Bingo! Pendzez could see why he was like that. At first, he wasn't like that. It wasobvious he had something to live for, but lost it. Pendzez looked from the ground to Jefferson, and asked, "Who did you loose?" It was clear that the hybrid loved someone, but was taken away from him. - Jefferson Soul - 10-19-2008 [html]
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