This Pulchritudinous Solitude - Printable Version +- 'Souls IPB Archive (November 2007–October 2012) (https://soulsrpg.com/ipb) +-- Forum: Dead IC (https://soulsrpg.com/ipb/forumdisplay.php?fid=110) +--- Forum: Dead Topics (https://soulsrpg.com/ipb/forumdisplay.php?fid=21) +--- Thread: This Pulchritudinous Solitude (/showthread.php?tid=5280) |
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- Cwmfen nic Graine - 03-10-2009 [html] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v515/ ... banner.jpg); background-position: bottom center; background-repeat: no-repeat;"> 500+ It drizzled lightly in the early dawn, and the world lay in a blanket of greys and blues. It was cold, but the air was still, and the bite of winter’s dying teeth was lessened. It was silent, and the world was filled with a simple profundity. The forest and the glade seemed empty, but the earth welcomed the form of a black warrior who shared the blue patterns of the earth upon her fur and the light of the moon in her eyes. Cwmfen stood within the center of the glade. The white orbs gazed slowly about in that calculating way, and she remembered that, only weeks before, she had practiced here the passions of her life. Her soul remembered. Her body remembered. The woad banded toes inched forward as she remembered there, wishing that her body would be ready for such things once more, rising stronger than she had been so that defeat may teach and strengthen her body and resolve. But she knew with a certainty that it was too early. The orbs turned earthward as a soft sigh escaped the woman’s maw as she accepted that fact, and it rose like a cloud to the heavens, slowly before dissipating in the cold, wet air. Her fur was damp as it clung to her body, but the down near her skin was dry and warm. The long scar down her back rose visibly now, a sure reminder of what carelessness could do. Her gaze lifted to the heavens at the sound of the crow’s voice, and she felt as if that sound of death were mocking her and her frustration. She found no solace in that Raven, and she felt no longer that it was a part of her Dream. Perhaps it had been, but the pied Raven seemed to grow distant and yet too near all at once. The woad warrior reached back, touching gently that scar upon her back. It had healed well with her patience, and it no longer tugged with an urgency when she moved. Perhaps she could shift down to her lupus form and avoid the temptations of her optime. Perhaps it was too early, but idleness made her impatient. Gathering up her will and energy, the female willed her body to change in that strange and unnatural way of the luperci. Like the wind and water. The black fae’s form began to melt and change, but suddenly, there was a pain, and it shot out in every wound that the coyote had given to her. The warrior cried out, and her will was broken as she fell panting to the earth. She growled at herself for her impatience as she slowly lay herself in the wet grass that cradled her form. The woad warrior admitted her defeat and the price of her impatience as the wound on her back split to give up some of her life to the earth. Her fist still clenched the tuft of fur she had found near the lake, and it held within it the scent of that stranger who had sought to take her life. - Haku Soul - 03-10-2009 [html]
- Cwmfen nic Graine - 03-10-2009 [html] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v515/ ... banner.jpg); background-position: bottom center; background-repeat: no-repeat;"> 500+ Her eyes were opened, but they saw nothing even as her gaze was fixed upon the blades of grass that rose up about her. The wolf’s mind had retreated for a moment back into the darkness of her consciousness, allowing her body to recover from the shock of her futile attempts. The pounding of her pain startled heart thundered in her ears as she lay there, quite still save for the rise and fall of her breath as she drank in the cold, damp air. It was because of that sound that the sound of his approach was unheard, and the gelid air stole from her the warmth of his proximity. It was not until he reached out his maw to touch her with his wet nose that the sound died away into tranquility and she became aware of a presence. His touch upon her ear was gentle, subtle, but she had not been expecting it. With a snarl, the female’s head turned sharply, her jaws opened and her teeth seeking that who had touched her. As she moved, his scent reached her strongly, and her vicious teeth scarcely missed the maw of her Lilium. Realizing her mistake, the female pulled away, and she found that the mastered control of her body was still there. "Haku!" But, having realized the identity of the male at her side, the female looked away, as if by doing so she would not have to share her defeat with the Lilium. As a warrior, she knew well that defeat was something to experience humbly, and she did, viewing it as a checkpoint to improve herself. But the nature of her defeat, aided by her indiscretion, was something of which she was ashamed. And the warrior thought that perhaps he would see it as evidence of her worth, or lack there of, of the ranks of Adonis and, especially, of Head Warrior. But when he spoke and used her name, her ear swiveled at the sound and she forced herself to look back at him. "I was out to become acquainted with the earth," the quiet alto began in her archaic speech. "Some coyote attacked me—I don’t know who." A light smile flickered faintly across her lips. The white orbs watched him carefully, almost tentatively. When the male moved away, the female said, "I was walking upon the ice, but it was thin, and I fell... The cold slowed me." She was almost whispering now as she explained herself, as if it didn’t matter. At least she had been offered a change to continue on the path of life, and she held within her hand the evidence of who the coyote was. The warrior had considered searching for him at the Inferni boarders immediately after her encounter with Onus, but she wisely decided against it. It would be better to go at a later time when she would be able to move properly once more. The black fae winced, and her breath caught as his tongue found her wound. He was gentle yet again, but the wound stung with his contact. After a few moments, she grew accustom to the sensation, and her tensed muscles relaxed. She turned her gaze to find that blue one, and the warrior was surprised to find something there. Worry? "You don’t have to...." There was a sadness in her alto melody, as if the day were raining because of it. But the warrior saw his gaze fall to her hand, and she turned to find the end of his gaze. Her woad bound hand unclenched, and the fur was left alone upon the wet earth. The white eyes looked back up at the chocolate hued male. "I found it there, when I went back." - Haku Soul - 03-10-2009 [html]
- Cwmfen nic Graine - 03-10-2009 [html] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v515/ ... banner.jpg); background-position: bottom center; background-repeat: no-repeat;"> 500+ Cwmfen was used to the pains of war, but she had never been so close to death as she had been those many days ago. There were pains that she felt that ran deeper than the wounds on the surface, as if every blow had cut into her with an invisible knife, bruising the deeper flesh. Against these, even the wounds of Brennt were forgotten, insignificant. But she regretted that she had shown her physical suffering to the Lilium who had come to comfort her. She did not mean to chase away his efforts. The warrior gathered herself, collecting the frayed edges of her control, calming the waters of her soul with a quiet breath. She watched silently as the larger male sniffed the fur that she had deposited. He did not respond aloud, but she saw that his look had darkened. And the black female knew that his mind would have turned to the conflict between the two packs. A frown tugged at her lips. But then he had moved again to stand before her, sitting with his tail about his paws. Briefly the female’s mind wondered how the male’s tail had been severed from the rest. Cwmfen looked up at him, and her light smile seemed less faint. "I’m fine now." But she found that she was better and that the waves of pain that had pulsated throughout her body had lessened. The white orbs searched the blue eyes of the male as they had so many times before, but she was less direct, remembering his mateship with Firefly. She could not deny, however, that she was grateful for his presence. Slowly, the female pushed herself up onto her left arm, careful to not aggravate her wounds. Once she had obtained a position with her body propped up and her legs beside her, she reached out with her right hand, the woad upon them still bright. It was almost as if she thought of touching his face, but instead, she placed her hand upon his leg, grasping it gently to as if to reassure him. Haku’s crude diction made a quiet laugh of grey tones slide into the air. But the female accepted his vow sincerely, surprised that he would find her pains worth the trouble. "I would wish that coward dead." The warrior perceived her attacker as such: a coward. She was a creature that fought with honor, that did not forget why she fought. Even in anger, as she had experienced with the male Brennt, she had not lost control, and she did not abuse his forfeit. The coyote, however, had no reason for attack, and he had caught her while she was weakened. Perhaps in war, the female would have accepted it. But not in times of peace. But she thought briefly of the boy, Ezekiel, who did not seem honorless. "But...." She did love war.... "Perhaps we should request Inferni’s surrender of this male." If the clan honored the truce, it should not be broken, regardless of her state, because of the insolence of a single male. Or perhaps there was some other occurrence of which she was not aware. Her grip upon the male’s leg tightened with a new wave of pain, and she clenched her teeth against it. Swiftly, she relaxed her grip, slowly letting out her breath. But she did not think that her attempts at discretion would fool the male, especially for their proximity. - Haku Soul - 03-11-2009 [html]
- Cwmfen nic Graine - 03-11-2009 [html] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v515/ ... banner.jpg); background-position: bottom center; background-repeat: no-repeat;"> 500+ The sound of the rain that fell like a mist filled in the silence between them. But the silence of Haku had never troubled the black female, for she knew that he said only things of worth. The warrior was comforted by his presence and by his warmth, and for once she welcomed the company whole heartedly. The white orbs watched him as he watched her, but his mind was working, brooding beneath that gaze. She wondered what it was that the chocolate secui was thinking. Through her touch she could feel his rage, and it was a powerful thing, but a dangerous thing. She wondered at that rage but did not refute it. She had felt it too, especially in the presence of Bane. It had not been because of him, and perhaps he had understood that. But now the rage was quieted, muted by something else. Whatever it was, she did not know. Perhaps it was simply the training of her mind. The same training which had failed her that day. Yet, even if it had succeeded, she suspected that she would have been dead anyway. Victory would not have changed the wounds, and so she was stilled in her rage. The woad marked fae’s gaze sought the blue pools. "Perhaps you’re right," the alto melody said at length. Perhaps he was. She was not, after all, as well versed in the habits and values of the Inferni clan as Haku was. She was new to this land and to its history. Perhaps it showed. The female did not think, in the end, that such a request would be heeded anyway. Would they simply view it as a show of their prestige? The female frowned. Perhaps, then, she had made a show of their weakness, and that bothered her. As a warrior, that bothered her. But she tried to set that aside, for it was unalterable now. And she knew that there would always be someone out there that was better, stronger. "Then what is there left to do?" She could feel Haku’s rage threatening upon her, becoming her own. Or had it always been there? The warrior realized that her grip upon the male had changed, that, instead of one of comfort, it had become one of support. She was tired again, weakened, but she felt as if she could sleep and would be stronger upon waking. The female’s hand loosened as it slowly slid down his leg. When she found the earth, she took its support and freed the male of her. The pain was a dull throbbing in the back of her mind, an incessant sensation that the female was slowly growing accustom to. With a sigh, the female lowered herself back to the earth, laying on her left side for her right was torn. For a moment, the female closed her eyes, swallowing against the small jarring pain from the impact of her body against the ground. When they opened, they were clearer as they looked up at the Lilium. Perhaps her mind was strange from the constant pain. But she did not want the male’s rage to be because of Inferni. Perhaps it was selfish to think it, but she wanted his rage to be because of her. A light smile tugged at her lips as she laughed at herself and knew that it couldn’t be that way. Instead the female said, "I’m sorry if I startled you, Haku," and kept her thoughts and desires deep within her hidden. - Haku Soul - 03-18-2009 [html]
- Cwmfen nic Graine - 03-18-2009 [html] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v515/ ... banner.jpg); background-position: bottom center; background-repeat: no-repeat;"> 500+ The woad warrior allowed a slow smile to flicker across her lips. Her head turned to gaze up at the chocolate and cream when he spoke, and for a moment, the warrior listened to only the sound of his voice, that deeper melody both cacophonic and euphonic, and she allowed herself to sense that strange dichotomy within him before the weight of his words sunk in. And then the black female breathed in the cool air deeply, his scent mingling with that scent of damp earth and leaves, as if to fully understand she were required to do so. For you and Cercelee, he had said, and she was comforted by his words. And she did not expect him to be idle when danger could be lurking upon the pack boarders. He was not that kind of wolf. If anything, she knew that much about him. A creature of impulse. But he had control too, which was just as important. Quietly, the female said, "It will be better to play nice before going for the throat," with that silver toned melody. "If Inferni continues their impassivity, I will eagerly join you in a war game, Haku." And perhaps this hesitation in the act of hostility was only her way of buying time, as if she were afraid that a war—if there were to be a war, that is—would start and end without her, just as it had when she had first come to the Dahlian boarders. And if only once in her life, the warrior wished she could have an opportunity to lead others into a battle and test herself. Perhaps it was selfish once more. Or perhaps it was simply fulfillment. Yet, there may not even be such a conflict. "Cercelee is a creature of peace," the woad marked fae mused as her white orbs found the male. "But even in peace, especially in peace, we must remember war." The female paused as she paraphrased a martial proverb, sighing softly against those endless, agonizing waves. "She will do what she thinks is best for Dahlia de Mai." That was certain. "But one who wishes at all costs to avoid conflict cannot have peace. It is the way of things. The world requires both for the other to exist." War and peace. Hate and love. Dark and Light. "That is why we have you." Why I have you. Regardless of what had been said and done, the female did not forget how she had felt that night beneath the full moon of December. "It’s okay," the female repeated the male’s words, almost a whisper. "At times, I’m lost in that moment, and I forget. It was not your fault." She was only glad that she had not made a mistake. The female fell silent then, simply enjoying the company that the Lilium offered to her. Her breathing slowed, became even as she lay with the cool earth at her back and the damp heavens above. Her heart was eased, became comforted as she lay with the warmth of the male at her side. She listened then, to the sound of the world. A calm serenity that removed her momentarily from the pains of mortality washed over her as she listened to that eternal sound. A woad bound hand lifted as she gentle brushed her fingers against his shortened tail. "Haku.... Can you stay with me for a while?" The white orbs had closed, and they remained that way as if uncertain. As if afraid that he would leave, be gone if she opened them. - Haku Soul - 04-10-2009 [html]
- Cwmfen nic Graine - 04-12-2009 [html] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v515/ ... banner.jpg); background-position: bottom center; background-repeat: no-repeat;"> 700+ A light smile flickered across the black fae’s maw. She understood his frustration and anger, feeling that some of it were her own. But she had come to understand the necessity of packs and societies. She understood the rules and knew that they must be in place for a reason, even if she could not yet see the use of some. Diplomatic relations with packs had been the most difficult for the female to understand. She was a warrior, and she was one who could solve disputes physically. But not all things could be solved in that way. "Each situation, just as the individual, is unique.... The same strategy, no matter how many times it fails, still has the possibility of success." The warrior could understand that much. And she had seen it within herself as she struggled to sort the emotions that some could invoke within her. The male did so now, and she struggled with it even as she lay there. The black fae was silent as Haku spoke. She gave a single nod in response to his inquiry. Yes, yes she did wonder, and she wondered often. And as his tale unfolded, the female came to understand the male a little better, to better know why he hated the coyotes and Inferni, why he had chosen to take up the position as Head Scout, and why he was so distant from everyone. All these things perhaps began with an emotion, and that emotion had taken over the male, had made him numb. And yet, what was strange was that, despite the darkness that lingered in his heart, despite the darkness that she could now feel through his bristling anger, he had remained with Dahlia, he had remained loyal to this entity. She knew that it must be this that Cercelee saw within Haku. But even if her Lilium had not chosen to share this with her, she had seen it. She only understood him better now. She paused, her hand lingering upon that tail. "We are all affected by our past.... Some have simply not endured as much as we have, and they have not taken control...." The warrior’s alto melody drifted off, and it was as if she would say no more. But then the melody started up again. "At least your injustice was not done by your own blood. The male who sired me—he seeks me now." The words were slow, as if she struggled with the concept, with the right words to express herself. At times, words were inadequate. "He wants my body...." She knew that Haku had raped his own daughter, but it had not been with the same intent with which her father carried. A soft sigh escaped the Caledonian-Korean as she gave up with that idea. "I came here, tired of running, and I have become what I am. But I know that, should he find me, I could not win." She could not win because she was not strong enough physically or mentally. Her will was strong, but that attraction that she felt for that soulless creature weakened her resolve. She was silent for a while before she said, "They fear those who know what they want and take it because such freedoms are against the laws of the societies in which they live." But Cwmfen had not been born within the same culture, and she did not have as many limits within her life. And she herself was not so complicated. She was a thinking creature, but she was a solitary and physical creature as well. She had difficulty expressing extreme levels of emotion, and she was unfamiliar with pure hate and even with love. She could not tell whether her intrigues and attractions could be called love. She had been told that she would know, but still she remained uncertain, and she felt as if such uncertainty would be unwavering. Her mind was lingering in that world between wakefulness and sleep, held there by the incessant ebbing and flowing of pain. She thought of Bane, who had saved her and ‘stitched’ her wounds, and she remembered what the pain had been then. It was less now, but her haste had broken his efforts to close the wounds—at least in part. The blood had long since ceased, but the pain. Bane’s touch upon her neck had been soft, and it was as if that touch had held the pain at bay.... Haku’s voice broke into her mind, just as Bane’s had, and she felt a similar curiosity for this brown male, the curiosity that ever lingered with the presence of this male. The white orbs looked up, contemplating his words and feeling that uncertainty once more. A soft breath escaped her. "And what if I asked you to do that which was left unspoken?" - Haku Soul - 04-17-2009 [html]
- Cwmfen nic Graine - 04-17-2009 [html] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v515/ ... banner.jpg); background-position: bottom center; background-repeat: no-repeat;"> 500+ A smile faintly, almost imperceptibly, graced her maw. She wanted to believe that that were so, that Haku spoke truthfully. The black fae did not doubt that integrity. But somehow she could not. With the idleness of her body, she had had more time to contemplate the world and her Dreams, more so than usual. And those Dreams had been plagued by the darkness—something different than the night and yet quite similar. It held the oppressive quality the ocean’s waters that drank in souls, carrying bodies to the deep. And she had felt it most keenly when she had been dying, when she had been under the care of one Bane Kiles. And it was strange now that she should be fallen now, the ‘stitches’, as the black male had called them, undone. But she was not in his presence; now she was in the presence of Haku, and she could not help but feel an acute—and acute something...it was an emotion that she could not describe. Or perhaps it were not an emotion. But her body was not dying now, only subdued. And as she lay there in that limbo, she was thinking of her father, unsure of whether that strange fear and desire were her own or whether the crow wolf had somehow instilled it within her from her birth. The white orbs were unwavering as he spoke, and those blue eyes seemed to radiate with some intensity. But these eyes were not blue and deep as the ocean was. They were the vibrant welkin of the twilight heavens, holding some different meaning than the eyes of another man. But for now there was only this single creature in her presence, and she considered only him. Her body remembered what it had given him, what the gods had bid her to give to him, and she knew that it was dangerous for her to have done such a thing. And yet, it was both that danger and the unique darkness of the chocolate male that had drawn her to him, that had made her hunger again in the nights that she had spent alone. But she remembered the night after the hunt of the New Year when he had refused her company to remain loyal to his mate, and so, unknowing of their broken union, she let her gaze fall, turning away from that gaze with a quietness. But there was no sadness or regret. There was only a strange tranquility that was often held by her soul. The woad bound maw buried itself into the grass, breathing in the soft scent of the rain and of the damp earth. The warm scent of Haku came unbidden to her attention, and she let out a slow breath. The warrior was silent as the woad tipped tail ceased in its movement, falling to cover her thighs and retain the warmth that the cold drizzling sought to take. But she did not want to return to the den; it was not as if she could go down anyway. And the cold would not penetrate too deeply if the rain did not come; she would be able to remain here until discomfort bid her to move. For now, she was content, and she returned her gaze to the male, silently wondering many things, first for herself and then for him, wondering if she kept him from some other errand. - Haku Soul - 04-19-2009 [html]
- Cwmfen nic Graine - 04-19-2009 [html] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v515/ ... banner.jpg); background-position: bottom center; background-repeat: no-repeat;"> 500+ The warrior was silent as she lay there, for once unsure. Since the attack, the warrior had experienced much uncertainty. And perhaps what made the warrior laugh a little (for what was life if one could not laugh at oneself?) was that she was at times unsure of what it was that made her feel that uncertainty. She had felt it in the presence of Bane, and so she felt it now in the presence of Haku. Where the warrior could become that authoritative image of warriors and leaders, at times of rest she was simply a wolf—timid, curious, and bold all at once. It was this, aside from that feral desire to be free, that kept the warrior alone. However, the curiosity did push her to seek the company of others at times, though often she did not need to for it was the other party that sought her. Her social ineptitudes had made her uncertain before, but now there seemed to be much more that made her feel this way. But then, Death tended to show the doors of many other arenas, and she had been close. Perhaps, she thought, it was what was Fated that made her uncertain. And her Dreams showed her nothing. The sound of his voice again made her stir. Those white orbs lifted, and she pushed herself up unto her elbows. Her gaze was steady as she watched the male as if she sought to read him. But in the end, the warrior merely smiled. She wondered why she was so conflicted, finding this state so uncharacteristic and ridiculous. And yet, she did not laugh, as if she were unable to find the proper chords. For a moment, she only listened to the dying sounds of her name upon his voice; the sound was suddenly foreign as if it did not belong to her. And then she pushed herself closer to the male, pressing herself against the warmth of his body and in doing so pushing the uncertainty that had threatened to consume her mind away. The soft shivering of her body, having only just been realized, was eased as her hands tentatively and yet confidently held him in an embrace that was also used for her own support. The woad bound maw was on the secui’s shoulder, and the touch of the two different forms was foreign. The soft smile was almost playful as she felt the effects of his warmth and of their proximity upon her body; the cold and pain were held at bay. “Why must you always hesitate with me, Haku,” the soft susurrus of the melody sang. The warrior was wounded and in the process of healing. There were times in which the female required another to lend her a fleeting strength, and this was one such time. And the child of Nemain was requiring not a physical strength but a mental strength. The white orbs shifted to watch his face. A part of her innocence had been taken that night within his arms, and she had been curious, almost hungering, since then. It was simply a part of life—she understood that as surely as he must. “Can you not accept me now?” - Haku Soul - 04-22-2009 [html]
- Cwmfen nic Graine - 04-23-2009 [html] http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v515/ ... banner.jpg); background-position: bottom center; background-repeat: no-repeat;"> 500+ He did not seem to respond to her touch. She did not know what manner of reaction she had been expecting, but the absence of one altogether was almost intriguing to the warrior’s mind. The warmth that radiated from him spoke of life, and yet his stillness spoke of Death. Such dichotomical properties could not be dismissed by the black fae, and as she lingered she could not help but allow her mind to explore this state. When she had felt his touch that night of the Long Nights, he had been alive to the extent that his touch had burned her skin, relinquishing a sensation that her body had often sought. But today, that fire did not exist, and she wondered at it. He seemed somehow different, though the female could not discern in what way he seemed to be so. And she could not decide whether the change was simply in respect to his response to her or whether it was a change in the entirety of his mind. But it was not this with which the female contended; it was whether this change were a good or bad thing that she tried to discern. His words made the warrior pull away from him. The white orbs looked into those blue eyes, but she did not detect any hint of remorse for his severed relationship. She did not expect to find any, for she knew that he was a creature that did not waste time with things he saw unfit. And so she did not say, as she had noticed was customary, that she was sorry for that fact. But she wondered at it again. "The night you took me," the soft alto began, as if deciding that he needed that explanation, "I was partaking in an ancient ritual—a coming of age rite of passage that I did not have the chance to do when I was within my homelands." That, of course, was only half of the purpose of the Long Nights. "When you found me there, the it had been bidden by the gods for me to accept a male." The white eyes considered the Lilium as if realizing that this may have been irrelevant; she did not think that he believed in the gods; she herself was not overly religious, but she did pay her rites. "But knowing your customs, I did not return so as to respect that relationship." Then again, Haku, too, had resisted her touch the night after the New Year’s hunt. A strange smile flickered across her lips as a woad bound hand settled on the secui’s shoulder. What she said next did not imply that the male suggested anything; she was not even sure why she said it. "You know that I cannot be chained by those customs, Haku." It sounded as if she would say more, but for a great while, there was nothing but silence as she considered those words. Her breathing was soft, interrupted only by the occasional shudder as she breathed away those dull torrents of pain. And once more she could hear the soft sound of the rain against the brittle grass and her own body as if her seemingly incessant voice had drowned it out. The white orbs, having drifted to the world beyond the chocolate male, returned to him. His words were strange, she decided, because even as he did indeed accept her, he was at once rejecting her...even at that very moment. "And yet you do not." The warrior wondered why. - Haku Soul - 04-30-2009 [html]
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