sooooo awkward 500+
She had never been so embarrassed in her entire life. She had also never felt so ashamed. What had she been thinking? Well, she hadn't been thinking and that was part of the problem. Her unfulfilled desires had gotten the better of her and she had done something incredibly out of character and now she was certain she had messed things up beyond repair. What could Mati possibly think of her now? Cambria knew this looked bad, very bad, and she hadn't the slightest idea on how to make it better. It made her want to cry, to run from the room and hide herself away so she wouldn't have to face the accusing looks and judgmental stares. She didn't do either of those things however. Surely the tears were welling up behind her eyes, but they didn't leave to stain her cheeks. Mati spoke briefly, before turning her back and closing the door. The sounds were thunderous in her ears and the cream tipped aurals folded back against her head.
The moment seemed as long to Cambria as it did to Mati. She was sickened by her, wasn't she? She supposed that the older Dreamer had every right to be, but that didn't make her feel any better. Had everything been so great for her to just blow it with one lapse in judgment? One stupid mistake. The girl couldn't help it as a soft whine came from her throat as her knees came up beneath the covers and she pressed her forehead against them, hand covering her eyes. Why did she have to do that? What made her think that it was even slightly alright? Her intention to surprise Mati when she came back to her room had been purely innocent, and now it had degraded into this horrible, uncomfortable mess. Cambria wanted to just disappear, to be invisible. She had messed up bad and she didn't think she could do anything to fix it.
The question Mati asked made her distressed face show itself again, though her eyes couldn't raise to the level of the other female's face, still too ashamed to look her in the eye. "No! If anyone should leave it should be me...I'm sorry...I don't know...this is your room, and I-" a startled hiccup interrupted her speech. "Maybe I should go...I'm sorry..." She couldn't stop apologizing. It was all she knew that could possible fix this messed up situation. Cambi whine again, burying her face in her hands. This was so awful, she felt so awful. "No, I shouldn't have...I just wanted to surprise you--but not like this!" she added quickly, not wanting Mati to get the wrong impression. "It just...I just...I..." She didn't know what to say. I want to be with you like that but didn't know how to ask? I was thinking of you the whole time? None of that sounded that good and she doubted her shakey voice would allow her to say anything of the sort even if it did sound alright. Slender arms just hugged her legs against her and she rocked back and forth, shaking her head. Why had she done that?
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