M - Pull Me Closer to Love

Mati Church · 08-10-2010, 09:50 PM

[html]

not sure about this post >< forgive

She knew she was still learning how to trust, still leaning how to let go. Each time she did she thought it was over, thought that she would never have to ride the emotional coaster that she took herself on at each turn of their relationship. But it was over, right? She needn’t fear every again. Mati didn’t know why she did, it was like someone took control or placed a voice in her head that said she would loose all the happiness that she had, loose it because she was careless. Maybe it was the pied male, his scars still etched into her arms, or maybe it was the back of the white wolfess that she would never see again and had bitterly let go so that she could go find happiness with another family.

Cambria was ready, she was always ready and waiting for Mati to come along and match her feelings and always at Mati’s schedule. What made her so perfect? Mati couldn’t begin to delve into such a mystery, reaping the benefits of the Marino’s perfection as they embraced.

The words passed through her thoughts slowly; I love you, I love you… her voice taken by the touch of her lips but she hoped they traveled through the contact and reached the other female with each passing seconds. Finally she parted from Cambria, her neck moved back slightly and her gaze looked to the green and blue tinted eyes and wanted for every minute of her life to hold the happiness she found just looking at her face.

Her heart beat wildly, her breath quickened and her chest rose and fell with a greater haste then when she fidgeted on the other side of the door that would never again keep them apart. Mati looked to see the stream of damp fur that started at the corner of her eye and ran along her cheek. Tears of joy, Mati thought with the knowledge that her own face had the same stained feature. Her finger ran down the trail, and for a prolonged moment she sat simply watching her and allowing her breath to settle.

I’ll never say no to you. She spoke the words so loud that only they could hear, the world beyond them lost. Some might think it was a foolish thing to say, of course she would need to utter a no here and perhaps one there. But to the Church fey it was the only way she knew how to lay out every bit of trust, to surrender forever. It was a word she had screamed in the face of another, one that had almost taken everything from her and something she had used to set the course of denial and hate for those who left her. No, she would never forget and no she would never forgive.

But she trusted Cambria, more then anyone past or present. Knew that her questions and requests would never mean to hurt her. Knew that even if she did leave she would never say the word and never not forgive and never not forget the pain. Finally, Mati got off the rollercoaster. Finally and for real, it was over.

Login




Remember me Lost Password?