3+ : Slight PP approved by J.[/html]
Her mind fizzled into nothing, left blank of the sight she had just witnessed for a solid moment before realizing where she was and what was happening. Everything emptied. The world went dark. A flicker of light entered in her peripheral. For a moment, a good long moment, everything was surprisingly calm; her mind didn't twist around the alleys that it frequented, choosing instead to wander through the bright meadows of happier times. Of times with her mother and father and Ezekiel all in one place. All safe.
Until Cotl's voice broken through her illusions, her world was perfect. "How sick do you have to be for you to not eat at all?" How sick. Was she sick? Her fingers hooked onto her lower jaw, breathing shallow. Her body rocked forward slightly with each breath. How sick was she, if Cotl could do that? She had slept with him. Life had led her to his bed more than once, playing awful tricks on her mind by offering the chance at motherhood and then taking it away. And she wondered then if it was her fault. Now it was clear that it wasn't. Cotl was to blame. Cotl was always to blame.
Her body rose from the ground in an elegant return to her feet, padded fingers brushing locks of russet hair over her shoulder in cold indifference. It was all Cotl's fault. She turned on her toes, crimson eyes falling on the smaller orange coydog. The world was grey, blood indistinguishable from the fur of the dead intruder, and joy seemed sucked from every atom in the air. Each breath she took made her chest grow tighter.
"It's eat or be eaten."
"He was going to eat Maschine."
A pounding in her head started behind her ears, bringing up a dull ache she often felt during times of disgust or panic. With a whimper, she pushed all thoughts of what had happened to a place behind her need for comfort, hurrying to Cotl's side. Her arms found their way around his torso in a hug lacking true feeling, head bowing to hide her sight in his fur. The scent of the blood was strong, sending thoughts of war and food into her mind full force. Thought Ezekiel had tried to help her gain weight, she still wasn't eating all that she could have been. She simply couldn't keep it down.
| Messages In This Thread |