rawrarar
Itzal shook his head. Was that what she thought of him? That he was lying, that all he wanted was "A quick fuck". He looked down at his hands and growled at himself. He had done this by leaving, he had made her like this, made her hate him. He felt the beast stirring, so he gave it what he wanted, he gave it blood. He bit into his wrist, feeling the blood flow into his mouth, and he lapped it down. He had done that many times over the past month, it was a way he found to surpress his darker side. He sat there and let it drink its fill, then let go of his wrist, wiped his mouth, and let his wrist bleed. It ran down to his hand and dripped on the ground. He shook his head, like an addict coming off a high. Then looked up at her. He did not like the way she was giving herself off, the way she leaned on the rock. "No, me and Ty didn't meet. And I thought you knew me. You honestly think, that if I was in control I would have left, do you honestly think, if I wasn't in control, I would have just let you seen. It would make me look weak, and you would probably have been afraid of me, afraid of what part of me is." He looked down at his bleeding wrist, and licked at it the wound and then let his hand drop again. "Is that honestly all you think of me now? That I would come to you just because I want to get off, or because I want to use you? I love you, I thought you knew that, I thought you would always trust in me, or at least think more of me then this. Yeah, I know I deserve it, not saying I don't, I guess I just wished that you at least tried to remember before I left. When you were with me, did any of it seem fake? Was I ever not completely honest with you? I know I left when you needed me, I know I left after Ty, after you were getting over him. But I swear, it was because I thought you were in danger. Nothing else could have made me leave." He got to his feet and stood, but he was weak, his head was spinning from the pain, both emotional and phsyical of his wrist. He looked at her and cringed, seeing what he had done. "I want you to understand, that while you might not love me anymore, I still love you. I always will. And I'll never forgive myself for doing this too you. I'll never be able to live this down. But for you to imply tha the only reason I ever got close to you, was because I wanted sex. I think that is worse then being dead. And you're right, you aren't a mind reader. If you were, you could see I do love you, I'm here because I want to be with you, if there is even the smallest chance you still love me, or even a flicker of affection for me left in you, I want another chance, I want to prove to you again that I love you. And I don't care about Nankio and her precious borders. I don't care about any of the fucking packs and their childish games. The only thing I care about is you." He spoke of the pakcs and the borders in a harsh tone, almost yelling. But by the time he said the last words, he was at a whisper, he knew they would have no affect, he knew she would never love him again. But he laughed at her threat to have him run out. "Go right ahead and call the warriors, but they won't run me out. They will kill me, cause I won't leave. There is nothing for me out there other then death, so why not just meet it here. As a matter of fact, I will walk right across the border and into your pack's territory. I will cross the borders and run through your territory until I find your sister herself, and I will throw myself to the ground at her feet, and beg her to kill me. She will probably enjoy it, be eager to do it. Kill the man who broke her sister's heart, kill the Inferni member who betrayed her sister's trust. I would be doing all three of us a favor right? I mean, if you no longer love me, if you hate me like I believe you do, you would want me to die right? Maybe that is what I will do. Fufill your last wish, for me to die, so you can move on and be happy. If that is what it takes, that is what I will do. I want you to be happy, with me, and if you can't, I want to die, so you can be happy without me." He took a step towards the border...and then collapsed.
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