12-22-2011, 06:45 PM
5+
She felt disturbingly raw after baring an extremely hollow and lost part of her time, of her souls to X'yrin. Like her insides had been scrubbed with steel wool and then washed down with vinegar. It wasn't exactly painful but it was very uncomfortable for her. Jace had never really spoken of the incident with anyone apart from Temo on that night when the children had been conceived. but she could see for all her words and attempted explanation the Nomad still did not understand, could not understand. Perhaps because the question was so specific and yet completely vague. Why did they feel love and various imitations of it?
X'yrin's declaration that she had never known love before and that the Nomad lifestyle actually weakened its grasp upon a person saddened her a lot. What must it be like to never know the bonds that held a family together, the gentle but fierce protectiveness of a mother, or aged and wise pride of a grandma or pa? Jace had never know her own father and so couldn't relate to that point but her grandfather had more than made up for her missing paternal figure. She let the woman speak her mind and heart rather than interrupt to asked the unasked questions but it all boiled down to the same thing really, why? Why had X'yrin suddenly felt this burst of emotion when it was clear she had never felt it before this time nor had she wanted to.
To be untroubled in such ways by death and loss was sometime of a dream to Jace, a fantasy that could never be realised or brought into reality and now it was thus so for X'yrin too. Her heart had opened even if the love she felt was not wrong but ill placed although was it ever wrong to love a child? Maybe if this love had formed because of her own children or for a partner she had it would be different, she would accept it and grown to appreciate it but the endless longing for a child that wasn't and would never be hers. Although she could understand the protectiveness over Sarian after all Jace had felt several times a wanting to take the child from Shiloh, the grey wolfess was hardly able to look after herself never mind a child as well, at least in Jace's opinion she was not.
"Pain and hurt is the chance you take with love. Like all of good things it can have a bad side as well. And you have to put up with the bad times as well as the good times. Life isn't always summer when food is plentiful and hunting is easier sometimes it is winter when it's cold and it snows and not everyone makes it through but those who do are stronger and for the experience. As for why Sarian was the one that opened you up for love, it could be anything really. We don't choose the people we love, it's almost like love chooses us in a way. When I met Temo I never knew that I was going to fall for him, I thought we would just be friends."
She felt disturbingly raw after baring an extremely hollow and lost part of her time, of her souls to X'yrin. Like her insides had been scrubbed with steel wool and then washed down with vinegar. It wasn't exactly painful but it was very uncomfortable for her. Jace had never really spoken of the incident with anyone apart from Temo on that night when the children had been conceived. but she could see for all her words and attempted explanation the Nomad still did not understand, could not understand. Perhaps because the question was so specific and yet completely vague. Why did they feel love and various imitations of it?
X'yrin's declaration that she had never known love before and that the Nomad lifestyle actually weakened its grasp upon a person saddened her a lot. What must it be like to never know the bonds that held a family together, the gentle but fierce protectiveness of a mother, or aged and wise pride of a grandma or pa? Jace had never know her own father and so couldn't relate to that point but her grandfather had more than made up for her missing paternal figure. She let the woman speak her mind and heart rather than interrupt to asked the unasked questions but it all boiled down to the same thing really, why? Why had X'yrin suddenly felt this burst of emotion when it was clear she had never felt it before this time nor had she wanted to.
To be untroubled in such ways by death and loss was sometime of a dream to Jace, a fantasy that could never be realised or brought into reality and now it was thus so for X'yrin too. Her heart had opened even if the love she felt was not wrong but ill placed although was it ever wrong to love a child? Maybe if this love had formed because of her own children or for a partner she had it would be different, she would accept it and grown to appreciate it but the endless longing for a child that wasn't and would never be hers. Although she could understand the protectiveness over Sarian after all Jace had felt several times a wanting to take the child from Shiloh, the grey wolfess was hardly able to look after herself never mind a child as well, at least in Jace's opinion she was not.
"Pain and hurt is the chance you take with love. Like all of good things it can have a bad side as well. And you have to put up with the bad times as well as the good times. Life isn't always summer when food is plentiful and hunting is easier sometimes it is winter when it's cold and it snows and not everyone makes it through but those who do are stronger and for the experience. As for why Sarian was the one that opened you up for love, it could be anything really. We don't choose the people we love, it's almost like love chooses us in a way. When I met Temo I never knew that I was going to fall for him, I thought we would just be friends."