08-07-2008, 09:59 PM
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Laruku had always figured that no one would miss him when he died. Gabriel had told him as much once, that he was useless and better off dead. The scarred, tawny male still believed it. He had done horrible things, unforgivable things. By any god's laws, he had sinned hundreds of times over and continued to do so. If anyone deserved to have Clouded Tears's old curse on his head, surely he did. A violent death was the only thing that was fitting. Or an embarrassing, pathetic one that no one would think twice to mention in the future. He had betrayed everyone that had ever loved him, that he had ever loved. No one would miss him when he was gone.
Her touch was still a surprise, her continued presence, her voice. It was difficult for Laruku to accept that she was willing to put so much on the line just to see him. It had always been hard for him to accept that there were still people that cared about him (none of them knew the truth). He felt guilty for putting her through whatever grief she was going through. Rachias had already lost her mother, her sister, her brothers. She had left the rest of her family. For what? To be with him? He didn't want her be alone. She deserved better than that. She deserved better than him. Was he all she had left? Why was that so unfair?
The lucidness of his thoughts ended when a sharp pain shot up from the base of his neck. He put both arms around his daughter and looked up at the empty white above him.
Laruku had always figured that no one would miss him when he died. Gabriel had told him as much once, that he was useless and better off dead. The scarred, tawny male still believed it. He had done horrible things, unforgivable things. By any god's laws, he had sinned hundreds of times over and continued to do so. If anyone deserved to have Clouded Tears's old curse on his head, surely he did. A violent death was the only thing that was fitting. Or an embarrassing, pathetic one that no one would think twice to mention in the future. He had betrayed everyone that had ever loved him, that he had ever loved. No one would miss him when he was gone.
Her touch was still a surprise, her continued presence, her voice. It was difficult for Laruku to accept that she was willing to put so much on the line just to see him. It had always been hard for him to accept that there were still people that cared about him (none of them knew the truth). He felt guilty for putting her through whatever grief she was going through. Rachias had already lost her mother, her sister, her brothers. She had left the rest of her family. For what? To be with him? He didn't want her be alone. She deserved better than that. She deserved better than him. Was he all she had left? Why was that so unfair?
The lucidness of his thoughts ended when a sharp pain shot up from the base of his neck. He put both arms around his daughter and looked up at the empty white above him.
I'm sorry,he said, simultaneously know and not knowing why he was apologizing. Or why he was crying.