He was embarrassed that she knew that he had slept with Princess, but he was ashamed that it had ended up driving a wedge between them. Haven never even thought that she would somehow come to the conclusion that he didn't need her because that was unfathomable to him. He would always need her and he would always love her. Nothing in the world could ever change that. It might change things between him and his other family members, but never her. She was so pure and good and right now he felt the exact opposite of those thing. He was wretched and bad and no good. Why had she even put up with all his problems for this long? Maybe he wasn't any better than their drug addicted mother. Maybe he was just as bad with alcohol as she was with her drugs. The thought made him want to vomit, but there could be some truth to it.
The male had thought of going to his sister after Siobhan had left, but he never had. Everything had seemed so meaningless and nothing had been able to dull the pain. Hitting Jac and talking to him hadn't helped. Even talking to Ruri hadn't helped all that much. It seemed that nothing could reach him, nothing could make it go away, so he had gone to the one thing he had known would make it go away. He knew it wasn't a permanent solution, but he had needed to forget. He had needed to not think about it, to not feel like his whole being was being torn apart. It had helped...and Princess had helped as well. He didn't think he could ever admit that to her though, not after all that happened.
Haven closed his eyes and could feel the tears threatening. If possible he moved his body even lower, wishing the ground would just open up and swallow him. "I don't know..." he said, his words accented by a quiet whine. He just didn't know.
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