Enya was slowly beginning to calm down in Kansas's presence. She breathed deeply in and softly exhaled. She had to practice socializing sometime, better late than never. Her eyes lit up when he told her where she could find books and that she was free to take them and read them herself! What sort of pack would have access and freedom to share treasures like that. Was there anything more precious than books? Books could freeze time, create time... they could be anything and this pack appeared to seem carefree about the whole matter. Didn't they realise that other creatures might want to steal the books? They should have been locked up safe somewhere, or hidden away. After the brief moment of outrage passed, Enya realised that if they had been locked away she would have no doubt not been permitted to read them. Her heart was beating fast. She wanted to see the books; she wanted them now.
She took another breath in and out. She had to calm herself. She couldn't lose her composure here, what would Kansas think of her... Getting so excited about things as trivial as books - not that she found them trivial at all but she needed to fit in. When he spoke again it was a question. Learn to read? That brought memories back, painful memories. She hid a cringe at the query and smoothed a large section of the floor over, preparing to write. She had to word it carefully, she couldn't sound pitiful but she couldn't sound arrogant either. When I was younger, I had a mother. No father. Just my mother. Before she left, she taught me how to write and how to read as well. I learnt from one book. I do not remember the name though. My mother gave it to me before she left, she told me to keep it safe. Enya felt her eyes water, I didn't protect it though. I let it get washed away. Washed away in a river. When I found it everything was so blurred and smudged I couldn't read it anymore. I disobeyed my mother and that is why she never came back.
Enya did not understand that no matter what had happened to the book, no matter what had happened at all, her mother would never have returned. This had turned into both a good thing and a bad. The wolf her mother would have raised her to be would have been a brutal beast, but without the influence of her mother Enya was lost. She alienated herself from society because she had never been taught the techniques to behave. She had never had the loving mother to nurture and raise her, this had changed who she was significantly. That was what kept her from speaking. Although Enya believed that she did try to speak and that it was something physical that hindered her, there were mental elements preventing her from voicing as well. She was subconsciously afraid that if she spoke her mother might return. Enya was deceiving herself with the illusion that she had lost her voice when in fact she still very much had it.
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