He did not belong there, among the flawless beauty of the ocean or in the gentle fall of the washing rain; neither would cleanse him of his sins nor dash away his scars from existence. The foam wriggling between his toes, he gazed into his one-eyed, mauled mirror and recalled days long past, when he stared at an ocean with Geneva alongside him. She had interrupted him then, just as she had so many times before, just as he contemplated the grip of death through sea-filled lungs; she had stopped him, splayed such thoughts from his mind, and from there broke through his fortress. Invaded his privacy. Taught him to love.
But she was gone, with all remnants of his love in her pocket.
He should have ended it then, Jefferson decided. She would have been spared the torment of miscarriage. Pripyat would never have lived with the guilt he did, knowing his father had lost a limb for his sake, though it had been willing and with no regrets. Phoenix Valley might have broken without his leadership, but those within it would have found their way to better and safer places. None deserved to fall beneath his gaze, beneath the piercing eye of a sinner, a man scarred by more than just the gashes in his skin.
He breathed suddenly, her voice breaking through the stormcloud he had unknowingly allowed through to his thoughts. At first the cyclops spun, wide-eyed, believing the voice to be true — but it was not. Alaine hovered over him, not the olive-eyed mother of his dead children; while he did not mind her presence, the Patriarch sunk into his shoulders and turned back to the ocean, unmoving from the sea and foam in which he rested. "Leave me alone," he muttered, a pause breaking before a sigh escaped his lips. "Please, Alaine."
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