Ezekiel had done nothing wrong. This was something she tried so hard to firmly believe, for the death was something she knew she couldn't forgive if he suddenly became the one to blame. Caillen should have stayed away — he had known he couldn't be part of her world, that she belonged to Inferni much like he belonged to his mother, and she had accepted that much. Why hadn't he stayed away? Why hadn't he simply waited for her? She should have never allowed it to go as far as it had — once it had turned to revenge, revenge for her father's ignorance to his family in breeding with the golden whore, she should have simply let it disappear. But no, her anger had transformed into care and from that sprung feelings she was unfamiliar with. Love was a foolish, ephemeral thing, and yet she could admit to herself now that she had loved the merle man, enough to betray the confidence of her beloved sibling.
She couldn't rationalize why she'd told the witch who had killed her son — wouldn't it have been simpler to not come at all? — and she didn't know what she would tell Ezekiel himself if it came to that time. Would he be angry? Would he hate her? Or would he understand that it had to be done, for closure for both herself and him? She didn't care about the Winters woman, only for those who resided within the skulled borders of Inferni. She had no soul to save, but she could try to help that of her twin.
What had it been, murder or accident? She couldn't be sure, she didn't know, she hadn't been there. Red eyes averted their gaze from the hideous green of the woman who grasped so tightly at her wrist — she wondered if Enkiel would notice the tender flesh when she returned, and if he would tell Ezekiel of her journey to meet Alaine. She didn't believe so. He had kept her confidence so far, yet she couldn't be sure. Perhaps Ezekiel deserved to know. Maybe she deserved what he would do upon learning that she couldn't even hold her tongue to save him. Maybe she should have cast herself into the ocean when news of her bastard half-siblings came to light.
"I don't know; I didn't find him fast enough." Still a whisper, her voice hid what she believed to be truth: Caillen's death had not been accidental, Ezekiel had killed the man for...what? Why had her brother really done it? For her or for himself, out of love or anger? She was a hypocrite, a whore, and now he knew the truth that everyone would soon see. Though she expected him to cast her away at the birth of her children, she could not help but muster the words to defend him before the woman. "Ezekiel is a good man — Caillen's death is my fault, not his. I take the blame. It was my fault. I shouldn't have let him love me."
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