there were no less than three red squirrels in this post. fuck yeah moment: one of them was a real word
Myrika is by me!
It was the quiet that brought her head out of heaven, all the warm and gooey thoughts and feelings induced at the mention of Vesper dissipating with the prolonged quiet. She hunkered down a little, though did not seek to extract herself from their sideways embrace, glancing at Cassie now and again. Her eyes seemed to be looking through the schoolhouse and everything in particular, and Myrika was growing more and more uneasy with the quiet.
She was perhaps steeling herself to whisper her sister's name when Cassie spoke, a word that seemed much louder than it actually was. There was a smile, but it seemed small and somehow not altogether there, as if her thoughts were still faraway as her eyes had been a moment ago. She remembered, in the quiet, just what had begotten her gushing about Vesper, and the track their conversation had taken.
Did you like someone very much, then? she suggested, feeling more coy than she actually was. An idiot? Like Tyveni?
You said no, but I don't think it's no, she wanted to say, though her questions were still gentle and given in the mild voice of a commiserator rather than an interrogator's cold tone, though part of her now well-remembered grief and strangeness was turned to angry hurt. That small thing wanted to throttle the hurt out of her sister and smash it to pieces on the ground, as if hurt was some diseased and vestigial organ so easily removed. She wanted to help and was not allowed that much. Better yet, she believed in knowing and listening, there was help to give.
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