Lena felt distant, detached from what was going on around her, as if all that was going on around her was just a buzz in the back of her mind. It was not often she became numb about things, but it felt necessary now. If she became overwhelmed with the sadness of leaving, maybe it would root her to her place, and she would no longer have the nerve to step away. This is what she wanted, and she was not going to let herself change her mind.
But, she had begun to crumble inward at the addition of another mournful howl. She knew the voice as well as she knew herself, and suddenly she felt very small as she felt eyes being pointed at her. The scent of her mother overcame her, and she was wrapped tightly by Sky's arms, and surprising, Lena held on back. Whatever she was expecting from this, it certainly was not her mother's appearance; it had only considered the negative things, and did not calculate her mother into the equation that would equal to her leaving, and the emotion that filled her now smacked her like a runaway train. But, she did not allow the fretting storm to show upon her face.
"I didn't tell you, because I thought you would say no." While her mother did not baby her as much as the pack sometimes did, she did have those doubtful moments that she would be withheld because of something that could not be helped. But, now she regretted not telling her sooner--it was the spur of the moment, and with Jiva and Palaydrian going to the same place, it just felt right to go with them yet she did have the time to tell someone other than Zalen about her leaving.
Hearing the tears in her mother's voice finally broke Lena, and she said hurriedly, "I'm going to V-Vinátta--please don't cry, mama!" She snapped her mouth closed, and she had to force her head from dipping to the ground to keep her chin up. "I... I just want to see more. I love New Dawn, but..." She was able to explain it perfectly to the alpha, so why couldn't she do the same for her dear mother? Words kept choking up, and eventually she stopped trying to talk, and she fell silent, waiting for the demands of her to go back to the den or something that would prevent her to go with the couple.
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