11-13-2008, 06:09 PM
She had known that she was going to lose the child dispite all Deuce and she had done. The silver and gold woman wasn't for certain what was going through her mind in this moment of time. Her ears were pressed back against her skull as she lay down atop one of the hills in the dampwoods on the edge of Phoenix Valley. Her mind was a buzz with memories of places she'd been, the lives she'd lived and the future that was stretched out forever until the end of her time. She'd lost children before but it still was something she knew she'd never actually get use to. The question echoed in her mind, how can you get use to losing someone. She knew it was just one of those stupid questions that had no real answer so she just filtered it into the back of her mind and left it there.
There was no snow upon the world today, it seemed that the sun had melted away the brittle cold of winter coming for just a moment in time. The woods were misty and dreary, actually reminding her of where home had once been. She smiled for a rare moment as she thought about Clouded Tears and how life had been as a child, how she'd been so horrid and bossy. She chuckled softly to herself as she wished her mother could see her now.. she'd give anything for her mother to atleast see that she hadn't resulted in a miserable failure.. that she'd finally settled down and made something of herself... She could bet her mother wouldn't have like half the choices she'd made but she was just as stubborn as the small framed white woman had been in her hayday and they would have had to just live with it.. but she knew dreaming and wishing and wanting for things she couldn't have were pointless now.
Instead she just sat there watching the weak pale sunlight filtering through the trees and dappling in the mists of the late autumn day. It was a strange way to mourn the passing of a child but to each their own.. and atleast she knew his suffering was over and unlike the two that remained nothing would ever break his little heart or cause him grief. There were no more neverending questions with no answers for him.. just as she once believed, an eternal life ahead of him romping and playing with the rest of the puppies that would never grow up. She smiled, hoping that perhaps the haunted hills of Clouded Tears would find theirway here so the children of Phoenix Valley would have more company.
There was no snow upon the world today, it seemed that the sun had melted away the brittle cold of winter coming for just a moment in time. The woods were misty and dreary, actually reminding her of where home had once been. She smiled for a rare moment as she thought about Clouded Tears and how life had been as a child, how she'd been so horrid and bossy. She chuckled softly to herself as she wished her mother could see her now.. she'd give anything for her mother to atleast see that she hadn't resulted in a miserable failure.. that she'd finally settled down and made something of herself... She could bet her mother wouldn't have like half the choices she'd made but she was just as stubborn as the small framed white woman had been in her hayday and they would have had to just live with it.. but she knew dreaming and wishing and wanting for things she couldn't have were pointless now.
Instead she just sat there watching the weak pale sunlight filtering through the trees and dappling in the mists of the late autumn day. It was a strange way to mourn the passing of a child but to each their own.. and atleast she knew his suffering was over and unlike the two that remained nothing would ever break his little heart or cause him grief. There were no more neverending questions with no answers for him.. just as she once believed, an eternal life ahead of him romping and playing with the rest of the puppies that would never grow up. She smiled, hoping that perhaps the haunted hills of Clouded Tears would find theirway here so the children of Phoenix Valley would have more company.