11-20-2008, 07:20 PM
The words he said were almost ghostly and she felt her spirits drop again, reminding her of why she was even out here as she sat back on her haunches and lowered her eyes down to gaze at silvery paws. She knew her cousin didn't care about the family as she did but after losing the pup she felt even more desperate.. the family seemed to drift further and further apart and all she wanted was to stay connected. Her tattered ears were flattened against her skull, the woman herself looking like a pup that had been scowled as she asked. "Why are you out here all alone?" She wasn't going to ask him again. She knew what his choice would be and she wasn't going to push it again.
Her nails tore into the litter on the ground as she wondered if she should just give up like he'd wanted her to do so long ago. If she should just give up on them all.. maybe it didn't matter or not what she felt.. though they didn't want her now or probably even in the future.. she would be there if even for a moment they needed her, no matter how selfish the need or how brief. Her want for family, for connection, for togetherness seemed so simple... but after so long in seeing how different their family was.. maybe it was best. She knew he'd probably be thrilled for her to admit her defeat.. but she was proud just the same. Instead she sat there feeling numb and strangely more alone with him there than when she was alone.
Her nails tore into the litter on the ground as she wondered if she should just give up like he'd wanted her to do so long ago. If she should just give up on them all.. maybe it didn't matter or not what she felt.. though they didn't want her now or probably even in the future.. she would be there if even for a moment they needed her, no matter how selfish the need or how brief. Her want for family, for connection, for togetherness seemed so simple... but after so long in seeing how different their family was.. maybe it was best. She knew he'd probably be thrilled for her to admit her defeat.. but she was proud just the same. Instead she sat there feeling numb and strangely more alone with him there than when she was alone.