04-28-2009, 07:32 PM
It was a pretty day, Brennt thought. It was uncomfortable to feel, but it was nice to look at. Brennt walked forlornly down the shoreline, thinking very innocent, simplistic thoughts to himself as he tried to settle down. He had just gotten over feeling very bad for a long time when he considered what his mother would think if she knew he was still eating puppies. That question always made him feel bad, but if he let the questions keep coming, slow though they might come, they invariably led him back to the conclusion that his mother must surely hate him for eating her new favorites, which elicited both resentment and horrible sadness from him in equal measure. Brennt wasn't very good about consoling himself or consolidating his emotions, and it was this slow-moving cycle in his thoughts which often drove him to becoming upset and desperate, which eventually led to his desire for children, because he could always remember the surge of relief he had felt after eating his younger siblings that day, the day that he had finally become too upset about the changes to do nothing anymore.
It had been a very stressful experience, living in this place. Brennt wasn't sure why he didn't move on. He knew why he hadn't settled down, though. The memory of Pallok's cruelty, Fern's casual disgust and Hylfi's condescending sympathy stayed with him. He thought maybe he liked Osric best, even though he knew Osric must have hated him for eating his first litter. Osric had feared Brennt a little bit, and had left him alone most of the time. The only thing Osric did that was bad was not welcoming Brennt into the pack...nothing had gone wrong between him and Osric, but that was because nothing had gone on between them, really. Brennt had a hard time considering the fine details, or even remembering them. That felt like forever ago. Now, he had lots of new people to worry about, and they were even more confusing than the last pack had been. Cwmfen had attacked him, then loved him, then attacked him again. So many wolves hated him before they even met him, like that gray and white wolf he'd hurt bad, and the eagle-wolf (as he referred to Dawali in his mind). He'd never been in so much trouble without doing anything before.
It was all the trouble he was getting into these days, as well as his solitude which invariably led to considerations of his mother, that drove him so often to the hunger of children. He hadn't thought about it consciously, but he was getting hungry for them much more often, now. He had already eaten three, and the stress still wasn't all the way gone. He was beginning to worry a little bit...What if it stopped going away at all? That thought scared him, and so he didn't have it very much. Unknown to him, he even now approached someone who he'd met before, and who very much did not want to meet him again.
It had been a very stressful experience, living in this place. Brennt wasn't sure why he didn't move on. He knew why he hadn't settled down, though. The memory of Pallok's cruelty, Fern's casual disgust and Hylfi's condescending sympathy stayed with him. He thought maybe he liked Osric best, even though he knew Osric must have hated him for eating his first litter. Osric had feared Brennt a little bit, and had left him alone most of the time. The only thing Osric did that was bad was not welcoming Brennt into the pack...nothing had gone wrong between him and Osric, but that was because nothing had gone on between them, really. Brennt had a hard time considering the fine details, or even remembering them. That felt like forever ago. Now, he had lots of new people to worry about, and they were even more confusing than the last pack had been. Cwmfen had attacked him, then loved him, then attacked him again. So many wolves hated him before they even met him, like that gray and white wolf he'd hurt bad, and the eagle-wolf (as he referred to Dawali in his mind). He'd never been in so much trouble without doing anything before.
It was all the trouble he was getting into these days, as well as his solitude which invariably led to considerations of his mother, that drove him so often to the hunger of children. He hadn't thought about it consciously, but he was getting hungry for them much more often, now. He had already eaten three, and the stress still wasn't all the way gone. He was beginning to worry a little bit...What if it stopped going away at all? That thought scared him, and so he didn't have it very much. Unknown to him, he even now approached someone who he'd met before, and who very much did not want to meet him again.