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The Church girl could sense the discomfort in Princess, the awkward silence that developed after her small response and the two sitting upon the floor. It was not until Princess spoke again that Mati followed suit and rose from the ground. The two had never spoke at this length, and though it started out as a confrontation that two had actually been able to moved past it. In the past they hadn’t, and Mati remembered when she had been so passive aggressive, and then simply could not allow the other girl to think that Haven was anything by honorable (even though it was all Princess thought). Though the sister didn’t like the thought of the two together, she was ready to move forward and call their differences as just that. Mati could not control her brother’s choices, and she was beginning to understand that in the end as long as he was happy there was nothing else that mattered. It was only her nature to distance herself from those that brought her angst, whether it was their fault or not. She wouldn’t fight her, having come to this understanding, but even know she still could not call Princess her friend. The two were simply not there yet. The young woman nodded, finding that words were not about to pour from her mouth. She felt the need for space, and was ready to create it.
The two rose, Mati feeling the ache of sitting so long seeping into her muscles. The brown wolfess was ready to dismiss the girl with a nod and a soft smile of understanding. It was time that they both were left to let the news settle, and prepared for how they would each deal with it. Princess would go see the mother that had pushed Ares away from all of them, and Mati? She could not guess to how she might deal with his disappearance. In the hesitation that the clothed woman made Mati turned to face her once again. The apology was a surprise and Mati spoke without thinking over her words,
“I would have done the same.” It was raw and honest and there was not restraint in them. Thankfully they did form calmly, and only said to show that Mati did understand and didn’t hold it against her. She would have blown through the other’s door, demanding answers and wouldn’t have been as restrained as Princess had been, even if she had though her emotions and actions volatile.
It was all she said, leaving her with no ‘good luck’s or ‘be careful’s. No, she had already given her all that Mati was about to sacrifice. The rest she needed for herself, needed to strengthen her own weakened psyche. Tears of moments past were dried on her cheek, as if they hadn’t even happened. But they had not dried up completely, still filling the well behind her eyes. The girl turned and retreated back into her room, feeling as if the past experience was a dream. Nothing had changed in the space that was her bedroom and studio, everything in is place. Mati had to looked behind her at the door that she had shut and remember the words spoken just beyond it. The shock returned, the feelings overwhelming and far more similar to the way Princess must have felt when she banged on the other side of her door. He was gone, gone before knowing the feelings that Mati couldn’t describe, feelings that had been so vulnerable that she knew if spoke aloud and rejected by the male would have broken her heart.
Tears fell, freely until her vision was blurred and she could hardly staggered to her bed. Mati placed her face in her hands, wishing that everything were different.