04-21-2010, 07:07 PM
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Wow, this got lengthy. Hope you enjoy it nonetheless. <3
Unfortunately for any curiosity, he did not completely understood why the smile had affixed itself to his expression. He did not wonder about it, however. It was simply as though he had assumed a different state, his mechanical mind shifting gears once. And once the shift had happened, Snake had accepted it and did not give it second thought. But it was apparent to Lucia, as it should; the smile on his face did not fade, just as his stoic expression had not before. It was just had been said, a change, and then set. It's cause was probably too abstract for plain understanding, but it had not happened before in fourteen months of life, until now. With logical reasoning, one might assume Lucia a sizable part in its cause.
She might not have found anyone else with opinions so aligned in her journeys, and that would be far more than he could say for. Snake had not met too many others; no one but family and pseudo-family in New Haven, passing wanderers on the road (he had spoken to next to none of them), no one on the way to Inferni. And while he had met several here, yes, there was always the part of him wanting to escape any social interaction. But in this meeting that changed, perhaps by their aligning opinions, or else. Now his attention focused solely on their conversation; Snake never focused on one thing, he usually made himself aware of his surroundings to be safe. Safety renounced, only making her words all the more true. He knew now the lowering of his own guards, something that would appall him before. Now, it only made Snake tilt his head slightly to the side, almost daring. He said nothing in response.
Lucia savored battle; it made more sense now, how she said it. Snake supposed that if he grew up and fighting was a choice and a hobby, not a necessity to keep drawing breath, that he would have liked it as well. He wondered if it was too late for him, too late for him to enjoy what he did for his clan. And though he didn't think he could share her thrill on the razor edge of death and ruin, he did understand it. There was a kind of exhilaration in fighting, besides the danger and the pain. As for him, "I fought to live growing up; I think that has robbed me of any joy in it. But in the contest, yes. if there is anything I might enjoy about it, it is leaving a battle knowing that you have bested someone else in one of the most basic of contests." For once in his life his voice took on a tone of duality, speaking two things at once.
Though perhaps not consciously. Despite any shift, Snake's psychology remained the same. His was one of duality as well, a calm surface of active conscious. There lived only present observations, thoughts, decisions. It was usually a quiet place. But his subconscious was deeper than he himself would believe, and that was where secondary thoughts lie for him. Ironically he did not grasp it fully himself at any point in time, but they remained there. The box where he had locked away his emotions for personal safety, everything else he discarded in return for better chances when fighting tooth and nail. Here appreciations for her presence here with him, her conversation, the fact that she did not turn away from him like others. Snake's mind was like a tranquil pool, and though it might seem shallow at first sight, it was deeper than those would initially believe. And creatures lived in those depths, the likes of which he had not fully seen, and anyone else less so.
With vague amusement he watched a bit of alarm in her eyes as he drew the pistol from his pocket, though it was little more than a flash in the pan. She liked her smoky appreciation for his own treasure, the only treasure he owned. But his olive eyes became all the more focused as she mentioned helping fix it, a goal that he had set for so long and thought would be impossible. There was in that focused gaze an intensity that he did not even notice himself, though was so starkly different from the green stone set in those sockets before.
But he did notice something in that last sentence, hidden still beneath the surface consciousness, but there nonetheless. He paused for a moment, musing on that glimpse, as his olive eyes met her malachite ones. Finally after a long moment he said, "Yes," and in speaking with both surface and depth. He took one step forward, but nothing more. Old habits remained bitter to the very end, and one of Snake's was, in fighting and most everywhere else, he so rarely made the first move.
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Wow, this got lengthy. Hope you enjoy it nonetheless. <3
Unfortunately for any curiosity, he did not completely understood why the smile had affixed itself to his expression. He did not wonder about it, however. It was simply as though he had assumed a different state, his mechanical mind shifting gears once. And once the shift had happened, Snake had accepted it and did not give it second thought. But it was apparent to Lucia, as it should; the smile on his face did not fade, just as his stoic expression had not before. It was just had been said, a change, and then set. It's cause was probably too abstract for plain understanding, but it had not happened before in fourteen months of life, until now. With logical reasoning, one might assume Lucia a sizable part in its cause.
She might not have found anyone else with opinions so aligned in her journeys, and that would be far more than he could say for. Snake had not met too many others; no one but family and pseudo-family in New Haven, passing wanderers on the road (he had spoken to next to none of them), no one on the way to Inferni. And while he had met several here, yes, there was always the part of him wanting to escape any social interaction. But in this meeting that changed, perhaps by their aligning opinions, or else. Now his attention focused solely on their conversation; Snake never focused on one thing, he usually made himself aware of his surroundings to be safe. Safety renounced, only making her words all the more true. He knew now the lowering of his own guards, something that would appall him before. Now, it only made Snake tilt his head slightly to the side, almost daring. He said nothing in response.
Lucia savored battle; it made more sense now, how she said it. Snake supposed that if he grew up and fighting was a choice and a hobby, not a necessity to keep drawing breath, that he would have liked it as well. He wondered if it was too late for him, too late for him to enjoy what he did for his clan. And though he didn't think he could share her thrill on the razor edge of death and ruin, he did understand it. There was a kind of exhilaration in fighting, besides the danger and the pain. As for him, "I fought to live growing up; I think that has robbed me of any joy in it. But in the contest, yes. if there is anything I might enjoy about it, it is leaving a battle knowing that you have bested someone else in one of the most basic of contests." For once in his life his voice took on a tone of duality, speaking two things at once.
Though perhaps not consciously. Despite any shift, Snake's psychology remained the same. His was one of duality as well, a calm surface of active conscious. There lived only present observations, thoughts, decisions. It was usually a quiet place. But his subconscious was deeper than he himself would believe, and that was where secondary thoughts lie for him. Ironically he did not grasp it fully himself at any point in time, but they remained there. The box where he had locked away his emotions for personal safety, everything else he discarded in return for better chances when fighting tooth and nail. Here appreciations for her presence here with him, her conversation, the fact that she did not turn away from him like others. Snake's mind was like a tranquil pool, and though it might seem shallow at first sight, it was deeper than those would initially believe. And creatures lived in those depths, the likes of which he had not fully seen, and anyone else less so.
With vague amusement he watched a bit of alarm in her eyes as he drew the pistol from his pocket, though it was little more than a flash in the pan. She liked her smoky appreciation for his own treasure, the only treasure he owned. But his olive eyes became all the more focused as she mentioned helping fix it, a goal that he had set for so long and thought would be impossible. There was in that focused gaze an intensity that he did not even notice himself, though was so starkly different from the green stone set in those sockets before.
But he did notice something in that last sentence, hidden still beneath the surface consciousness, but there nonetheless. He paused for a moment, musing on that glimpse, as his olive eyes met her malachite ones. Finally after a long moment he said, "Yes," and in speaking with both surface and depth. He took one step forward, but nothing more. Old habits remained bitter to the very end, and one of Snake's was, in fighting and most everywhere else, he so rarely made the first move.