on the way to grey
#1
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Mati. wc:393



Momma was gone. It was an odd thing to get used to, and simply thinking about it sent the Marino girl’s thoughts roiling within her mind. Her mother had been such a consistent and vigilant figure in her life that home almost seemed to be empty without her presence. Thankfully, all of her siblings had remained in Phoenix Valley, though it seemed that some of them were preparing to move in with their aunt during their mother’s absence. Lucia stubbornly refused to leave their mother’s home; there was so much change going on around her already that she childishly clung to whatever constant she could find.



The girl felt that a change of scenery would do well to straighten out her muddled thoughts and feelings, or at the very least banish them for a time. The concrete jungle wasn’t far from the pack lands, filled with such a variety of sights and sounds that it was guaranteed to steal her attention away. By the time she’d arrived at a more urban portion of the city, the clouds had decided to begin their daily dose of rain. The droplets lightly pattered on the asphalt, conveniently stifling the echoes of the girl’s footsteps within the narrow city street. Lucia largely ignored the shift in weather, letting the water cling lightly to her fur as she walked.



She had been to the city a number of times with her mother and siblings, but she never had much of a chance to explore it on her own. Most of the buildings were large, towering structures that would dwarf any of the scattered cabins in Phoenix Valley land. The Marino girl herself was just a speck amongst the sprawling city blocks as a whole. All it really amounted to was more for her to see, in the end. She drifted silently along the narrow street, jade eyes catching glimpses of the urban decay around her. When she wandered beneath an old, partially torn canopy alongside the entrance to one building, she stopped briefly and shook the excess water from her fur. The girl studied the outside of the building in her pause, a faint tinge of curiosity ringing in her mind. She leaned in through the broken display window to peer around at the building’s contents, mindful of the glass shards that still sat within the window pane.
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#2
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thanks for starting! :]











Rain drops tapped across her head, and though she knew it was a poor decision the female brought her gaze skyward and look up and into the clouds that dribbled on her head. Drops caught her eyes, and Mati frowned deeply. Rain was not something she appreciated, especially when she had set out to gather things that were sensitive to the weather. But it was her own fault, for choosing a day that was so dreary. But they all were, the Church fey had found, and they all rained at one point or another. From her room, beneath a roof, the rain was a beautiful thing. The small translucent dots against the large windows, catching the light of candles scattered across her table, it made for quiet an inspirational scene. But it did not feel the same as she strode down the city streets, an empty tattered canvas bag on one shoulder.

Fingers raked through the waves of fur that fell passed her shoulders, freeing some of the moisture and a bit of her discomfort. It wouldn’t last long, Mati tried to convince herself, and she would be able to go back to her searching in a few long rainy moments. The brown wolfess turned the corner quickly; knowing the street well and where the stores that were the least looted lived and keeping her mind set on getting under a roof as soon as she could.

A figure in the distance made her pause. The alley way had dumped her out into the middle of a city block, the corner as well as the rain making it hard to have noticed the scent of the other wolf. The Dreamer watched, noticing that the other female was standing right in front of her destination. She cursed silently, not sure if it was fate or if it was bad luck to meet another soul in the city’s belly as the rain grew more intense just as she willed it to stop. Instead of avoiding it, and loosing the materials that she needed and thought would find the wolf walked towards the other. Slowly Mati approached her, though she was more then eager to get inside.


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#3
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No problem. Big Grin



The pattering of the rain on the old tarp of the awning above her got even louder as the storm began to pick up speed, like miniature horses stampeding above her. The noise echoed faintly into the building that she was leaning into, giving the half-illuminated building a much colder and desolate feeling. She could see rows of shelves lining the store, the majority of them still stacked with merchandise. Lucia didn’t know what the majority of the items in there were, but she could make out little white, undecorated pots lining the shelves nearest the window. The girl frowned at the sight, faintly puzzled. A chilling breeze swept through her damp fur as she stared into the building, making her acutely aware of the increasingly stormy weather. She could step inside the little shop to avoid the rain and give herself an excuse to poke around all of the stuff that sat upon the various shelves.



She straightened up and took a step away from the broken window, and when she turned away from it she found herself nearly face to face with another wolf. “Jeez!” she cried in surprise, stepping back from the stranger. “Whatcha gotta be sneaking up on me for?” Lucia narrowed her jade eyes and looked up at the taller girl, simultaneously annoyed that she hadn’t detected the other wolf’s approach and that this stranger had practically crept up behind her unnoticed. She eyed the canvas bag the other carried, determining from it that she had some obvious goal in mind when she came here. Luci just didn’t see how sneaking around behind her had anything to do with it.
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#4
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She hadn't been rushing harshly, well at least not running towards the other female. And she had certainly not hoping to startle anyone with her presence. The rain had increased steadily until it could be classified as pouring, and the stranger was standing under the only cover along the entire block and right in front of the store that she wished to enter. Just as she got beneath the awning, a final relief from the pouring rain just achieved, she heard the voice of the other female loud in her ears. Mati stepped back a foot, the rain fell against her back for a moment before her returned to the shelter of the tarp.

The younger woman looked at her, and Mati's own violet eyes glanced at her face and figure. She was obviously perturbed by her presence, unwelcoming under the cover of the store's tattered banner. She understood that the city brought many dangers, and that they all needed to be careful, but a friendly face and scent were something that should be appreciated when found. My apologies. she spoke, but then her voice did not tell of any true meaning of the word. She walked passed the young female, her eyes glancing at her as Mati entered the building. The store was one that she enjoyed, picking from it sparingly so that the supplies would last as long as she could make them.


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#5
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Sorry if this post is wonky; I had about three different ideas of where to take it as I wrote. >.> wc:432



The woman’s curt apology provoked no further reaction from the Marino save for her continued stare. She saw the flash of violet eyes as the woman glanced over her one last time before slipping silently into the store. Lucia huffed like a spoiled little girl when she found herself alone outside again, ears folding back against her head in confusion and displeasure. Well, wasn’t that just nice? She eyed the continuously increasing rainstorm past the shattered veil, the pattering along the tarp’s thick fabric increasing in speed and volume as the storm picked up. She could find some other place to hole up in for the time being, but getting soaked to the bone in the process didn’t sound like much fun. Remaining out beneath the tattered rain-shelter wouldn’t exactly be a blast either. That left her with just following the other lady inside, then. A mix of frustration and embarrassment twirled in her belly at the thought.



Lucia opened the door after a moment of hesitation and tried to step in as quickly as she could to avoid being noticed, though with the way the sounds of the storm outside amplified within the old shop with the door open, it was altogether pointless. The younger girl slipped her way toward the rows of shelves she had seen holding the little white pots, hoping to get herself out of sight as quickly as she could. She stood and studied the little pots, feeling overall rather foolish. The Valley wolf let her inquisitive gaze drift along the room. It was dimly lit, but she could see cobwebs hanging in the corners and around shelves of unused merchandise. The place smelled strongly of rain, dust, and the odd materials the merchandise was made of, but the stranger had added her own scent to the mix. It was then that Lucia noticed something that her surprise and the powerful scent of fresh rain had hidden from her outside. This stranger smelled like Papa; she had to live in the same pack as him.



Suddenly the sandy-furred girl’s interest rose. She could hear the woman’s footsteps from somewhere further in the store, but the way the slight curve of the building’s roof reflected the sound made it hard to pinpoint her location. The girl peered around the large shelf she had hidden behind, hoping to catch another glimpse of the stranger now. “So you uh… you live in Crimson Dreams, yeah?” she called out. Her stubborn pride and youthful curiosity left her with this tentative question as her form of apology for her own discourteous behavior.
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#6
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oh, i liked it!! Big Grin

Being "To the point" was not something Mati naturally came to. No, she would normally elaborate a little, sweetly explaining herself if the need arose. But the woman was experienced, and if being a Nanny had taught her anything, it was to not encourage behaviors that she saw unfit. She didn’t know why, for the female seemed old enough to be an adult, but she brought that reaction out of the Church woman. It was an instant response, and Mati did not look back as she entered the store, taking care as always to avoid that broken glass (some that she had swept away during a past exploration) and then began her search.

The store was full of artist supplies and crafty things, but their quality was the best compared to other larger places. She used them sparingly, only on the projects that she cared about the most. Eyes adjusted to the dark, and violet orbs peered out at the things that were left for her pickings. She liked how there always seemed to be something that she had missed the times before, something hidden on a back shelf or something she had simply overlooked. The fey reached into the canvas bag, her thoughts drifting away from the female that stood outside the door, and picked the candle that she had brought with her. Being prepared for the gloom of the store was something she had learned from practice.

Matches hid in the bowels of the bag, and she needed to search for them and as she rummaged her ears worked to find that she was not alone. The voice rose, and the Dreamer looked up. Matches in hand she looked at the light toned female, her question an obvious reaction to Mati’s scent. It was a bit more polite then her last accusation and Mati saw no reason not to answer. I do. Her voice subtle and slightly mater of fact. She lit the waterproof match, and brought it to the candle that sat on one of the candlestick holders that the shop had been trying to sell all those years ago.

Without looking at the younger femme Mati questioned her, Your from the Valley? She smelled of wet wolf and of the pack, and of Rio. It was a distinct scent, one that Mati had memorized as her half blood. She wondered if this was one of them, another child of Naniko. She had worried and wondered about meeting more, and though Rio’s honeyed nature had made it easy for her to accept her into her life Mati was not sure about any others.


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300+
#7
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wc: 347



The woman’s terse confirmation hardly came as a surprise, but the younger girl found herself quite pleased that she got a response at all. The brief reply served to intensify her youthful curiosity, and as she watched the Dreamer set a candle alight, her thoughts began brimming with questions and possibilities. The girl had only ventured to her father’s home once before, but already she found herself forgetting much of what she had seen as a pup. What was it like living there? How many family members of hers really lived there? Supposedly there were more mysterious relatives lingering around the Dreamer pack, according to Papa, but she hadn’t the faintest idea who they were.



Before the sandy-furred girl could fire off another question, she found herself facing a query of her own. Certainly the earthen hued lady had picked out the pack in Lucia’s scent just as easily as she had hers. “Yep,” she began with an almost cheery note in her tone. “I live there with my brother, and sisters, and my…” Momma, she had wanted to say, but she hurried to correct herself. “My auntie.” The cheerful pride that colored her voice had disappeared, leaving a slightly bitter edge in its wake. Her mother’s desertion was still a fresh event in her life, and when she was away from home it was sometimes easy to forget that it had happened. Perhaps it was simply wishful thinking. The girl didn’t want to dwell on it, though, and she quickly tried to find a way to distract herself from that train of thought.



“Um, what’s it like, in Crimson Dreams? You like it there?” It was a simple question, one she asked almost too quickly in order to change the topic at hand and quell some of that curiosity she still had budding in one corner of her mind. Lucia lifted one of the little white pots in front of her to examine it, but she found her gaze drifting to the light of the candle, watching the flickering shadows that it cast across the room.
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#8
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The candle’s light flickered in the dark room. Mati continued to look around the shelves as the Valley wolf confirmed her beliefs. She continued on, and Mati focused on her tone. The number of siblings made sense, remembering Ehno telling her of the little girls and boy. But when her tone trailed and puttered out to explain that it was her aunt that she lived with Mati grew less confident in her assumption. She picked up a bottle of ink, it was dusty and she wiped it away to reveal the name and making of it. Violet eyes looked up to Lucia’s face. They had gone nameless long enough, and though when she thought to question further the other female had one ready for her.

She nodded and placed the ink on the table by the candle, she would gather the things she wished to take there. It was an easy question to answer. Her life in the Dreaming territory had gown exceedingly enjoyable for the Church fey with the introduction of she and Cambria’s relationship. Of course Mati had not regretted staying in her birth pack once, even though she was the only one of her siblings that still resided there. I love living there. She spoke honestly. One of my mothers still lives there, and I have many good friends. We’re all family there. I have a studio, and am the pack’s Nanny. She gave a soft smile, the asked her own question.

Your one of Ehno’s? I've met Rio, from your pack. She wondered aloud and explained, thinking back to Rio and how excited the young dark female had been to know that they were related. She had a feeling that she would not be met with the same cordial attitude. Of course, Mati didn’t exactly reach out to embrace the unknown wolfess. My names Mati Church The relation gave no notion of her relation to Naniko, but she figured she should introduce herself.


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300+
#9
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The girl turned the little pot around in her hands, barely noticing the slight roughness in its texture. Staring idly at the small thing, she tried to imagine the pack was like as the Dreamer began to describe it. She made it sound like such a wonderful place to be, but Lucia could hardly remember such a feeling when she had visited there in the past. Sure, she had been surrounded by people who were apparently her family, but she could only remember feeling rather out of place during the brief few days she stayed there.



Despite all the ties she had to the western pack, her feelings toward it had become rather confused and muddled over time. Everyone over there, like Papa and her new acquaintance here, all seemed to love it. With her one experience with the pack itself, she didn’t quite understand it, but the desire to understand it was still there, if somewhat masked. So her ears were attentively taking in each word, trying to conjure up a mental image of the manor, her studio, and the big happy family the pack apparently was. There was only one thing stated that she didn’t quite understand. “One of your mothers?” she asked, a touch of confusion punctuating the question.



When Lucia heard the names of her father and sibling, she returned her gaze to the earthen toned woman. “Yeah. When’d you meet my sister?” Rio never told her about meeting anyone else from their father’s pack, but now that she thought about it, she hadn’t been speaking to her siblings all that often lately, especially after their mother’s decision to leave. She felt the sudden urge to return home and spend time with her littermates like she used to, but she dismissed it. There was no sense in dwelling on it now while she was stuck in this shop on a rainy day.



Lucia began to nonchalantly move from the shelf she stood at over toward the other wolfess as she introduced herself. Jade eyes studied the little bottle of ink beside the candle for a brief moment before turning their attention back to Mati. “Lucia Marino,” she said in turn, hands fiddling slightly with the little white piece of pottery they still held.
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#10
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Mati couldn’t imagine another life. Sure, heartache had been felt in many ways during her life there, but she believed it was the pack that had been able to pull her out of those shadowed and painful places. Savina had helped her when she had been attacked at the University, Anu when Naniko left them all. Others of course, even Ehno had helped her understand that her mother and the litter that this wolfess before her had come from was not something to be bitter towards. Though he had not been completely successful in removing the feeling fully, Mati was coming to understand the situation far better. Still, it was a happy family and a place she hoped to raise her own family one day. What it was like in the Valley, Mati would likely never know. But she hoped that it was the same. She had come to truly like Rio, and wished her the same love and support that rang loudly in the Dreaming world.

The question was answered with nod and a small smile. She had always assumed that Naniko had never told her other children about those she had left back in Crimson Dreams, and in her meeting with Rio Mati had been assured that were the truth and she was brave enough to assume it once again. She could forgive that lack of information when they were younger, but it seemed foolish for them to never know what blood they owned in Crimson Dreams. I have two, they were mates when I was born. She explained, still wondering why she said she lived with an aunt and not her mother.

A month or so ago. Mati said as she gathered all the information. The other female came closer, her green eyes unmistakably Nani. Her own violet had seemingly been pulled out of thin air, no one of their bloodline owned them. Naniko never told you that she had children in Crimson Dreams? the question came as smoothly from her lips as possible. Her gaze remained on the other fey, and Mati found that the anger she once owned for this situation was dying quickly. It was now simply annoying to be so easily forgotten by her birth mother.



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300+
#11
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Ohh, I really like that table. :o wc:399



The woman explained away the question of her parentage so easily and matter-of-factly that Lucia’s confusion was dispelled quite quickly. The Valley wolf herself had never encountered such a pairing, but now the mere idea of it seemed so logical that she hardly gave it a second thought. “I see.” Her thoughts were then quick to focus on the matter of when Mati had met one of her dark-furred sisters. Lucia wondered again why Rio had made no mention of this to her, but her thoughts could not focus on it for long, as Mati was quick to speak up again.



She froze as soon as Mati’s next question reached her ears, shocked at first by the mention of her mother’s name and by the implications the question left behind. It made sense, though, that she would know who her mother was, considering that she was aware of her father. What didn’t make sense was that she was suddenly faced with the knowledge of other siblings, that momma had even kept this information from her. “No,” she managed after a moment, still trying to sort through the implications of this news. She quietly placed the little white pot on the edge of the table between them, no longer finding slight comfort in fiddling with it. It took her a moment to find her words again, but when she did, she once again brought her gaze up to the older wolfess.



“She left them behind too, then,” she spoke, the previously displayed venom back in full force. It wasn’t a question, but a mere revelation to herself of her mother’s behavior. It was still hard for Lucia to comprehend why her mother would want to leave her children behind to go off on whatever little venture she had taken up, and now she was faced with the fact that it was apparently a habit of hers to leave her children behind and forget about them. A harsh and angry fear gnawed at her very core at the thought of being tossed aside and forgotten by momma. That had to have been what Naniko had done with her children in Crimson Dreams, right? Why else would she have neglected to even mention them to Lucia and her siblings? And through all her confusion and budding resentment, still it escaped her that one of those very siblings was standing there before her.
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#12
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thanks, & sorry for the wait!!

It was not easy to just air out all the cobwebs that littered her background. Should she also say that her own father was a rapist and a murder? Should she just spill the knowledge of Naniko being raped by one that had once been her mate? That would certainly place a few ideas in the younger wolf’s mind. Mati scolded herself for even thinking so bitterly. She would never give such information, that was her own weight to carry, hers and Haven’s. There was no need to place it on Lucia, even if Mati found herself tempted. She hated how talk of her mother turned her so sour.

The brown wolfess only nodded for a moment, taking in the idea that Naniko had once again left. Why couldn’t she have gone before all this? The night she left Crimson Dreams should have been the last they all seen or heard from her. But instead she had wrapped Ehno into the dramatics that had seriously pained more then just the Church fey. But the world always continued to turn in its own direction and fate played out for certain reasons. How many had she hurt? Mati thought of Rio, and wondered if she was still the sweet little girl even knowing that her mother would rather be without her.

You’ll find yourself better off. Mati spoke, the bitter taste on her tongue. She finally found something that they had in common, mere parcel-parentage was not enough in the dim light and the gloomy atmosphere that the rain produced. I certainly realized that after a while. The Church female couldn’t help it, and with the pain that was so easily reborn in her heart at the topic she fluidly spoke, She was an addict, and almost killed your cousin. Violet eyes looked up at the other’s face, wondering what sort of reaction such news might bring. She knew it was wrong, but the past of her father was still locked away, Naniko’s rape a mystery to the green eyed girl. At least she hadn’t spilled it all.


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300+
#13
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No prob. <3 wc:386



Bitterness had a way of spreading, it seemed, appearing now in the Dreamer’s voice as she declared that Lucia would be better off without her mother. She immediately wanted to deny and discredit such a claim, but words already spoken by the Church woman had done well to worm into her thoughts and plant seeds of doubt there. She had already left her children behind once before; maybe this was an inevitable fate. Should the D’Angelo woman’s second litter consider themselves lucky that they had to face this now, rather than later? Mati’s second comment made it seem so, and as she thought on those words, it brought with them a dawning realization.



At first it seemed curious to Lucia that the woman’s comments came with the bitterness that only first-hand experience could provide. And then, it was like a piece of the puzzle had been slipped into place. Mati was one of those mysterious siblings in Crimson Dreams. It all began to make sense—the harshness of her words, the bountiful details of Naniko’s true nature. And with the next words that came pouring forth, it certainly seemed like there were plenty of details to be shared that Lucia never could have dreamed of. The sandy furred youth could only stare at her with wide eyes as all this information finally came to light.



Confusion worked to swirl about her thoughts and feelings, leaving her feeling lost and vulnerable in the face of all this new information. Her tempestuous nature had left her completely, making her feel like a little lost puppy once again. “An addict? She almost killed…” Her voice trailed off and she shook her head as if the action could simply make it untrue. “Why would she?” Her mother, a killer? It couldn’t be. She was a healer, a nurturer. The mere notion was difficult for the girl to fathom. But it was possible, wasn’t it? Her mother had apparently led a whole different sort of life in Crimson Dreams that neither she nor papa had deigned important enough mention, so why couldn’t it be? This whole situation was frustrating her so much that she almost wanted to cry. She forced herself to remain calm as long as she could in hopes of clearing away the enigma her mother had apparently been.
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#14
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Mati regretted it. It wasn’t immediate, the pleasant feeling that came after speaking the words blocked the morals that she knew she owned. Would she say this to Rio? Mati knew the answer, and knew that she wouldn’t. Why did it make it okay to tell this half sibling? The questions were clouding her thoughts, making it hard for her to see the confusion and the conflict that lived in the green eyes and the dimly lit features of the other female. But the second couldn’t be answered and she pushed it away and finally blinked it away and looked clearly at the younger fey.

Then came the regret. The words she spoke were riddled with the unknowing. Mati knew that feeling, had asked and spoken the very same things. But it had happened, and Mati still did not know the answers to these things that she asked and now Lucia wondered. Hardened by time Mati had become cold when it came to speaking about her lost mother. How could she have told her like this? But then Mati hadn’t made these mistakes that made these truths what they were, wasn’t that enough to ease the guilt?

It was the drugs, Mati began, not allowing for the pain to return. Pushing it away distanced herself from Lucia as well. Her eyes left the tan female, taking a deep breath and allowing herself to consider that this truth was not the same stale cold feeling for the other as it was for her. she couldn’t help it. She left it around so that a puppy could find it. The excuse was fake, and Mati could only allow it out in the open for a single moment, Not after she started using the white powder. She could have helped herself by not starting at all. Looking up at the other fey Mati wondered is she hated being the one to break the news to the Valley wolfess. She couldn’t decide

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#15
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328



She was stuck somewhere between disbelief, confusion, and hurt. She wanted to believe that this was all just a big lie, but she couldn’t find any reason not to believe it true. With the tumultuous mixed feelings she already had about her mother’s departure, it was easy for the words spoken by Mati to cling to the worst of those feelings and prey upon them. Why couldn’t it be true? She was callous enough to leave all her children behind so easily, so why was it hard to imagine such a dark side to her?



The youth found herself unable to keep her gaze steady upon her half-sister, and she instead lowered her jade eyes down to watch the flickering of the candle. Momma had hurt one of her cousins, a puppy. With drugs? Lucia only had a vague understanding of such things, gleaned from what she saw of her mother’s occupation as a healer, but the disdain in the Dreamer’s voice was enough to solidify it as something bad. Bad enough to nearly turn momma into a killer, it seemed. Mati’s explanation of what had happened sounded like a hollow excuse even to Lucia. Is that how momma explained it to everyone, that she was careless enough to leave her stuff around to hurt others because of some white powder?



“I don’t understand how she could do it.” Her voice was beginning to take on an almost pleading keen. Whether she was pleading for her half-sibling to make this all untrue or to bestow some sort of clearer understanding upon her, she wasn’t sure. “It’s just so, so…stupid! It was a losing battle against frustration and she could no longer keep her tears in check. She wanted to lash out and hit something to vent her building frustration, but she kept herself still. The girl wished that she had never decided to come out to the city today. She would take blissful ignorance over this any day.
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#16
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Mati wasn’t one to lie, not about this. It was her own mother, and if she would wish away this truth then she would. But she could understand if Lucia felt it all a little unbelievable. They didn’t even know each other, for all this Valley wolfess could figure Mati was twisting lies out of ever bit of information that she had been given. But even if the Church female wasn’t flawless she wasn’t capable of doing such a thing, and a small part of her hoped that the Marino female would believe her. Part of her wanted her half sister to not forgive Naniko just as she couldn’t.

Her fingers fiddled with something that sat on the tabled in front of her. The exploration and hopes to collect new supplies had taken a far back seat. She had planted this seed in the other girl’s head, and it was wrong for her to have done so and leaving her now would be even worse.

Lucia’s voice broke the silence that seemed to linger behind each of their statements. Mati shook her head slightly, No one can. her voice was soft, trying to curb the tension that she had brought into this situation. Mati didn’t feel that anyone could understand, for it was so very unbelievable, so irrational. No one would know what made the alpha of a pack fall so quickly and far.

Then the bottled emotions came to a peak, bubbling and then over flowing. She looked as if tears welled in her eyes, the dim light made it hard to tell but in the flicker of the candle Mati could see the glistening on her cheek. Now Mati didn’t know what to say, or how to calm these emotions that she herself had felt so very long ago. Everyone makes mistakes. She’s a good example of how not to act. Could it be a positive twist on this depressing news? Mati felt out of place to embrace the tawny girl, if it could help her unhappy thoughts and sadness.

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#17
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Sorry for another fail wait... wc 357



Forgiveness wasn’t a foreign concept to the girl, but until now it had always seemed like child’s play, some arbitrary little game everyone played as pups. A sibling plays a little too rough? You forgive them. Steal a snack from them some lazy afternoon? They forgive you. But this was much bigger than simply pushing a sibling down the cabin’s front steps. It wasn’t something a simple ‘sorry’ could make better. All these dark secrets only painted her mother’s departure in the worst light. Who knew what else she had hidden from them all this time. And if momma truly had left with the intentions of leaving them all behind? Lucia wasn’t sure she would be able to forgive her.



In the brief and heavy silence, she was aware of how dreary their surroundings were. Standing in some dark, dusty little building, the sound of the storm through the broken window set the tempo for her wild and confused thoughts. Mati stole her attention back with softly spoken words, such a stark contrast to her statements just moments before. Lucia wanted to hate her for bringing this all up and leaving her floundering in the revelation of their mother’s sordid past. But some part of her knew that she would have eventually found out. Why not get it out of the way now, do away with that sickeningly sweet ignorance.



“What did you do when she left you? When she did all this…” The words were tentatively offered, soft from tears. So unlike Lucia’s usual loud and rambunctious tone. Mati was older, wiser, and she had gone through the same thing, had to face the horrible facts when they had freshly crawled into the light of day. She was fine now, thinking about it, discussing it. She had moved on and could face the details without tears in her eyes, unlike the younger of the D’Angelo’s children. And maybe the sandy furred youth could reach that point too. The bitterness still lay there, certainly, but Lucia understood that such bitter feelings were like surreptitious serpents, slithering in and out of view so easily, but never completely vanishing.
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#18
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no worries!! sorry for the super quick reply ><

Mati had been a mess, discouraged and an emotional wreck when Naniko had turned her back on them. Her mind had been preoccupied with caring for Cambia the day it had happened, and then her memories moved from the face of the sick puppy to the fire that the white wolfess had started in the house she had apparently been staying in. She and Brooklyn had tried to bring her back, but it had failed. She did not blame herself for the problems that arose from her inability to bring her mother back home. Relationships had suffered, and not just those that existed between Naniko and the rest of the pack. Family ties had been strained, but Mati placed the blame on her mother and took none of it. She had been young then, how could it have been her fault?

Mati took a deep breath, speaking as she exhaled slowly. My brother had moved to Cour des Miracles, and I went and stayed with him for a few days. Then, when I returned home I began a life without her. It was not that simple. She omitted the fact that she had tried to get drunk to smother her depression, but Haven had stopped her. But it had been a meager attempt and less then a meaningless detail. I confided in my mother Anu, and my pack leader Savina. She paused, looking at the sandy hued female in the low light. Your aunt. Savi had been there for her many times, and the black wolfess was like an aunt to her, another mother in a way.

She wished the storm would stop, wished the rain would move on and they would be left with a sunshine that could raise their somber emotions. Mati fought to find the right words, tried to remember what the others had told her but nothing clear would come. Sitll she attempted, You will to find others that can be there for you. And some day you will realize, that you don’t need her. Her tone was soft but laced with the hopes of encouraging Lucia to see past the heart ache that this new brought her. She had three siblings, a pack that could be her new family and she had her father as well. Her support system ha dnot completely collapsed.

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#19
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I don't mind the quick replies. <3 Maybe we can start to wrap this one up? wc:318



Denial and disbelief were beginning to claw at the edges of her frantic thoughts. The picture perfect image of her mother had been tainted and it made her start to question so many little things in her life, wondering how much of it could be shadowed by lies. But wouldn’t it be so much easier if all the twisted words spoken here in this dusty little shop were the real lies? Nothing would change, everything would remain as it always had, as it always should be. She could still cling to her old ignorant bliss and simply shrug off this encounter, forget about it. It was the easy, cowardly way.



Perhaps it was Mati’s presence here, so solid and real, that made it hard for Lucia to fully dismiss these tales as dark and twisty lies, crafted to strike at her when she was most vulnerable. The bitterness and the subsequent reassurance that laced the Dreamer’s words were so convincing, it was hard to believe that there could be any falsehood within them. Truly, Lucia hadn’t fully realized how she felt about Naniko’s departure until now. She loved her, and wanted to believe that she had left with only the best intentions, but she couldn’t deny that sting of betrayal and abandonment she felt. This new information only served to further vilify her in that regard.



The Church wolfess began to share a touch of her own experience in the aftermath of their mother’s sordid behavior. Lucia took in each uttered word with an almost desperate attention, mind whirling with images and new details. A brother in Cour des Miracles, her Auntie Savina, a soft reassurance that she would be able to move on. “I hope so,” she confided. She wanted to be able to move on, just as Mati had, to cast off this horrible feeling of dejection and deceit that seemed to crowd over her now.
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#20
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sounds like a plan!

The storm wouldn’t end for many more hours, though the violence that it held had dimmed. Lucia’s feelings would not leave her in the next few hours, not even in days or perhaps months. But they would dwindle; fade and their strength would become weak and easily masked and forgotten by others. Then, she would go experienced in the art of forgetting and moving on.

Mati wouldn’t have been surprised if the Valley wolfess refused to believe her, if she had been in Lucia’s position she might had out right told her she was lying. But Mati had seen it with her own purple gaze, the evidence spread at the white wolfess’ feet. If she wished to not believe, then it would only take a conversation with any long time Crimson Dreams member to rehear the same tale. The witnesses would not hold back if Lucia questioned them.

Mati felt the need to leave this place, the unsettling feeling that had filled her stomach and her chest goring and tightening from the dust and dingy air that lingered in the store. The only way to move forward was to take the first steps and just as she had help Rio with the first one’s in her upright body she wanted to show Lucia that the rain could be refreshing and cleansing.

Lets get out of here. She spoke. Her voice was higher and lighter then before, her thoughts expertly pushing aside the memories of long ago and focusing on the present. I think that the rain has slowed. whether it was true or not would be determined when they reach the door, but she was ready to take the gamble. Mati picked up her bag, gathering what ever had been placed on the table (by either of the two wolves) and without waiting for a response walked to the front of the dark room.

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