Life's a moving target.
#1
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p. look i wrote bunches of nothing! >.>

There was a cast of clouds covering the sun, their color a wintry gray and lighter then her silver pelt. Rain was not in the air, though even the Sun knew that they needed it. Her flowers and garden had become over run with weeds, sucking the life out of the plants that she had rooted there months ago. They took any bit of rain they got, and left nothing for the rest. Anu pulled at the greenery, the basket she used filled and overflowing.

Alder sat among the weeds, his dark masked face looking out from among the tall wisps of plants. He was her shadow, even though she had told him time and time again that venturing out on his own was just as fun as sitting by her side. But the mother knew how he felt alone, and knew the uneasiness that came to his face when approached by someone he didn’t know. She didn’t see the harm in letting him tag along in her hopes of clearing the garden.

The pup watched his mother, biting at the nearest stand of narrow leafed weed. Her blue eyes looked up at him, noticing that he was growing quickly and as soon as he could change to his Optime for he would certainly tower over her. Anu stood, giving the pup only a look before brushing off the dirt of her hands and took the basket and began her way through garden and towards the forest that stood beyond the manor. Alder followed, and when she dumped the weeds out among the trees he began digging them into ground and pushing them around all in the hopes of helping.

Their work done mother and son walked towards the Manor, her step slow and his bounding to keep up.

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#2
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that's what starting posts are more or less about XD 300+

Savina had been doing a bit of spring cleaning in the library of the manor. Rearranging some of the books and dusting off the shelves. It was usually kept in fine order, everyone valuing the room and its contents, but the mother's little pups were all out on their own today and she needed something to divert her attention. It was so funny, how things changed so quickly. When they were still fresh to life and around all the time they ran her ragged, and yet when they grew and she finally had time to herself again she would find herself at a loss as to what to do with her time. It had happened the last time and here it was, the cycle repeating itself once again. She sighed as she pulled a book from the shelf and flipped open the pages. Two long metal things clanged to the ground and she picked them up, looking at them curiously. She had never seen anything like them before.


Emerald orbs turned back to the book and saw illustrated instructions using the two metal things, referred to on the pages as knitting needles. The woman flipped through the book to see the end result which was apparently a scarf. She looked back to the needles. One could craft a scarf with these things. Ideas filled her head, of being able to create special garments for her babies to keep them warm in the upcoming winter months. This brought a smile to her face and she quickly flipped to the front on the instructions again to see what else was necessary aside from the two needles. It seemed that yarn was all else that was needed. She didn't remember seeing any of that around the mansion, but surely she would be able to find some in the city. Closing the needles in the book again she left the library, intent on going to find some yarn.


The Italian beauty opened the door to the manor and easily walked down the steps of the porch. The sound of someone coming in her direction made her head turn and her smile grew as she saw who it was. Anu was walking back towards the house, her young boy Alder following at her heels. "Anu!" she called, waving. Her quest for yarn could be put on hold for now.

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#3
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Anu often wondered what made the small wolf that walked beside her tick. He was very much unlike the other two boys and she had never had a pup stick to her so closely. Honestly, the mother couldn’t have been happier to have her son at her side even though she knew that he needed to be encouraged to venture off. She did, she told him again and again with soft gentle nudges that he could go explore or go play with his brothers and yet he clung to her. She told herself she would’t stop trying to make the boy branch out, but his company was certainly becoming an enjoyed addition to her existence.

They walked together in contented silence and when they came close to the house, she wondered if he would want a nap or to walk to the lake with her. Maybe they would find the other boys and the three of them could play a game and let the mother rest. The ideas rolled through her head, and before she knew it a familiar voice was calling her name. She and the pup beside her looked up to see to the Commander standing just beyond the door.

Savina. Anu called back with a smile of her own. She wondered what brought her out during a dreary day, but of course it could have been anything. Alder faltered in his step, and slowed slightly so that he trailed behind her.

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#4
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Savina hadn't really gotten to know her friends children yet. Of course she had been present for their birth and had often checked in on Anu to see how she was doing in the days and weeks after. However, as a mother, she understood how important and precious those first few months of life were and she hadn't wanted to intrude on that special time between the older wolfess and her litter. The Commander knew their names and their appearances, but that was about it at the moment. She eagerly wanted to learn more about the three boys, now that they were venturing out on their own and growing just as fast as her own little ones were. In passing she had taken note of the fact that often Alder stuck to his mother like glue, but it didn't strike Savina as odd. Each pup was different, and there was no need to push them out of their comfort zone unless necessary.


Her Lt. General looked up and spoke her own short greeting, a smile on her face. The Italian woman noticed the pup's slip up, and his revised position and wondered if she had accidentally startled him. She hoped she hadn't, but once he got to know her surely he would see that there was absolutely no cause to be shy or cautious around here. Leisurely she walked over to meet Anu and her son, her wavy raven hair flowing behind her. Once she reached her dear friend she gave her a quick hug. "How are you doing today?" her eyes trail down to the small boy before adding, "And you too Alder? I hope you're both well." She couldn't imagine anything could be wrong. There were few greater joys for a mother than spending time with her children.

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#5
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Despite the busy lives of the two leaders they often found time to reconnect and simply relax. Each had new litters that took most of their attention, but Anu felt that the pack was only bettered by both trios that the females had given to the ranks. Puppies drew members together, brought new light, new energy and added a needed sense of responsibility. She had always felt that this was the purpose of their gathering and forming a hierarchy; so they could give protection and a place for young ones to be raised.

The overcast day was not going to be one of gloom as Anu looked at the wide and bright smile of her good friend, embracing Savina just as quickly and warmly as they came together. The empty basket hung on her arm loosely as she spoke, We were just getting my garden in order. She said with a small but curt frown, knowing that it was likely that her patch of land would not be revived until next spring. Fall was just around the corner and so was the frost that would kill even the weeds that ran ramped. I think its time to ready it for winter. She admitted, looking to the boy as the Commander addressed him.

He looked up at the green eyes woman, sitting quickly as he heard his name and looking away. But he smiled, more bashful about the attention she gave rather then afraid. He knew not to ever fear Savina. His tail gave a few full-hearted thumps, and after looking at Anu who nodded the ink tinted male gave a well practiced, "I'm is well. Hows wyuo Safwina?" His ears fall back as he addressed the alphess, courageous at his mother's side. The silver and tan wolfess looked to her, her own smile widened by Alder's show of bravery (her encouragement was working), and commented, I hope your good too.


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#6
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300+

Savina would always make time to spend with Anu despite everything that kept both their lives busy. Leading the pack could be taxing enough, but with both of them new mothers, it basically ate up every spare moment of time either of them had available. She knew that neither of them would wish that their situations were different though. Still, her own free time was beginning to increase as her children grew and no doubt Anu was slowly making her way into that stage of her sons' lives as well. Besides, they needed some nice, light hearted conversation. Many of their previous talks had been fairly serious in nature and it was about time they just exchanged pleasantries and nothing else.


The Commander nodded at Anu's response; she could have guessed as much. When the weather was warm and nice it was an easy bet to make that the tawny woman was out tending her plants. Though with her short frown and following words it was clear that she wasn't too happy about what the near future would bring them. Honestly, Savina wasn't thrilled with the near prospect of cold temperatures either. "I hope we'll have a bit more warmth before the frosts come. I'm still not a fan of how cold it gets here in the winter." Her skin lightly prickled at the thought of the two winters she had now spent here. She would have to be digging her scarf and coat out soon.


As the sable woman looked down to Alder he looked away, but she could see the smile that grew on his masked face. The boy reminded her vaguely of Cambria, when she had been that little. He looked to his mother quickly for assurance before politely answering her query. "I'm glad you're well Alder, and I am doing just fine myself, thank you for asking," she said especially warmly, wanting to encourage him as well. Her emerald gaze moved back to her friend's face. "I was just tidying up the library and came across a book that explained how to 'knit' things, like scarves. I was thinking if I could find some yarn I might try my hand at it. It would be nice to be able to make all the children some things to keep them warm this winter." Savina always worried about the little ones in the frigid months.

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#7
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Winter would come as it always did, but the female wished for its delay more then ever this year. Her time had been spent inside for most of the warmer days, and she pleaded with the Earth to give him one more blessing and keep fall long and warm and winter off and in the distance. Of course she had been blessed enough, her wishes made truth and it was selfish for her to want more. But she was only a creature of flesh and blood, another one of the Sun’s followers that would always wanted more then the praise and prayers they could give. Hopefully fall will be long and mild. She spoke with a smile. The leaves would turn suddenly and only with a warning that they wouldn't wish to recognize, at least that was how she always thought it to happen.

The boy looked back as his mother, and Anu gave a raise of her eyebrows and he read the silent request without a second glance. His face and blue eyes turned back to Savina as she spoke to him, his smile faltering slighty but remaining on his face though his ears had fallen in shyness and respect. But the Commander’s warm words were enough encouragement to bring life to his tail, wagging it generously.

She listened to her friend as she explained what she had been doing, it seemed like they were both hoping to do some cleaning but got distracted. Knitting? She questioned, knowing little of human past times of clothing even know so many canines around her wore them so often. That would be lovely. She exclaimed as Savina spoke of the pups. Anu had thought about how winter might affect them in the ways of hunting, but she hadn’t thoughts of strictly the cold and all the pups they needed to keep warm.

I suppose we will need more blankets this winter too She commented, thinking about the future. But at least we’ve added a few more warm bodies. Her tone was light and her voice held a bit of humor on it, knowing that the added body heat also meant there would be more mouths to feed in the lean season, but they had never had a problem in the past and Anu suspected there to be no problems ahead of them.

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#8
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Savina knew exactly how Anu felt. Being a new mother meant that you didn't have that much time to spend outside of the house. She didn't tend to the plants as her friend so masterfully did, but she loved the feel of the sun on her back and a warm breeze through her fur. Just as her children, she was a spring child and warm weather was always her favorite. Also, her body was ill-prepared for the temperatures that the weather here dropped to in the dark moons of the year. Where she was from in Italy it never got so cold. After the first winter she had hoped she would be able to handle it better, but that hadn't been the case. "That is always my hope," she said with a light chuckle. The longer the cold weather was staved off the better.


As she looked at Alder and his ears fell back she worried that she had done something to upset him in some way, but his tail wagged and it put an end to her fears. Even if she felt she knew him, the notion wasn't necessarily true for the pup as well. As time went on though hopefully he would feel more comfortable in her presence. Savina didn't want anyone in the pack to fear her, especially not her best friend's son. Anu wasn't tuned in to the pastimes of the humans, and neither was the Italian fey usually. In fact before today she hadn't ever heard the word knitting, but know that she knew what it was she could see its use easily. "Yes, hopefully I'll be able to figure it out. It looks a little complicated." The diagrams had appeared as if they were being as clear as they could be, but it still seemed a bit daunting. She would have lots of time to try and master it though.


"Oh, yes, that is a good point. I will keep my eye out for some when I do visit Halifax." Really, they could never worry about having too many blankets. It was always better to have an excess of such things than not enough of them. Anu's comment made her laugh. "There have been quite a few new faces lately, haven't there?" They seemed to come in waves. They would go months without a single newcomer and then they'd be all over the place. "Maybe we should ask some of the men to get some wood for the fireplace as well. Better to stock up now in good weather than have to go out in the snow to find some later." Jazper wouldn't have any problem chopping some logs up.

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#9
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Despite their wishes and wants the winter would be just like all the others and always longer then they hoped. But what they had was experience, knowing what was to come and being realistic in their expectations of what was to come. But she was light hearted about the fact, and smiled at the dark she wolf. Laughing softly just as she did. Winter would come and they wouldn’t be as ready as they really wanted to be and there would be something that they had missed and did not think about. But they would be prepared enough to withstand, and their instincts would bring them back to the basics that always kept them alive.

Alder seemed to be fragile in a way, though there was nothing about his form that made him so. Anu was sure that he would be a rugged and tough male as an adult, but she knew that on the inside he was sensitive and easily marred. The mother didn’t know why, feeling as if she had tried her best to allow all her boys to blossom and become who they were meant to be. She supposed that this was part of who he was destined to become. But as all mothers hoped, Anu did not want him to be afraid. But the seconds ticked by and he grew more comfortable with the Commander.

Anu let the boy lean against her leg, allowing him to gather the courage that the position gave him. He always felt more comfortable against her. The older fey’s attention was drawn to her leader, giving a supportive smile. Anu reassured. Savina was bright, and if a human could master it she was confident that Savina could too.

I will look as well, and remind Mati to do so too. She is there often. Anu did not frequent the city herself, but she knew her adoptive daughter looked for art supplies there. At her question the fey gave a nod, Yes, have you met Marcus? He is well traveled, and has been to Italy. She spoke with a smile wondering if the two travelers had spoken. I think they will be willing, can’t imagine them not wanting to show of their strengths. She said with a small bit of humor. I would send my three with them, to experience something I can’t give them. She said, thinking of masculine things for them to experience, as well as other things for them to do with male packmates. I am hoping that Kansas will teach the boys to read, and I might ask Ehno to show them some craftsmanship.

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#10
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Sometimes children were the way they were no matter what the parents did. Savina didn't know why Parker had yet to utter a single word or why Artemis so rambunctious and accident-prone. It had been much the same story with Cambria. The girl had received the same support and love that Amata and Gotham had, but she had always been more meek. She seemed to have inherited that from her father. It hadn't really crippled her in any way though and she had come into her own with her position as the pack's Practitioner. Surely Alder, too, would find his niche and grown into it even if he continued to have his timid disposition. All they could hope for as parents was that their children would be happy when they grew up and could make their way in the world. They could only keep them under their wing for so long.


The mention of Anu's grown adopted daughter sparked something in the Marino matron's mind. Cambria had come to her the other day and told her that she moved from her room upstairs down into Mati's room on the main floor. The sable woman had suspected there might be something more than friendship between the two and that had finally been confirmed. Her daughter had been a little nervous to tell her, but of course she had accepted the fact without issue and was happy that she had found someone to love her as she so deserved. "It seems that our girls are quite serious. Cambria has moved into Mati's room." Savina didn't know how much or little Anu knew of the situation, but she couldn't help but to breach the topic. Regardless of what was known, she knew that the tawny fey would be just as happy for them as Savi herself was.


"Yes, I did meet him the other day. He is a very interesting and wise fellow. I'm glad to have him with us, I'm sure his experience will be a great help." He was by far the eldest of the Dreamers and she had no doubt that he would be an invaluable member. "Heh, yes I'm certain they will. Especially if they have an audience to show off for," she said, sparing another warm glance down to Alder. "I would send Silvano, but I think he'd be horribly bored by it. I think that he will be much more interested in intellectual things than those that require muscle." At least that was the inclination he was showing in his life thus far. "I'm sure Kansas would love to teach them! Ehno as well. They would both be quite flattered, I imagine." She knew her mate and brother would be honored to play a part in the boys' development.

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#11
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Now that the pups were bigger and she had been a mother for a few months Anu had gained small bits of confidence as a parent. She had forgotten how it could be molding young minds form the very beginning and now she was on her own. With no mate the blame would be placed on her solely, if any of them developed incorrectly. But she had come comfortable in the new routine, knowing that their needs were and fulfilling them. She understood that Alder would need more from her then the others and Anu was happy to give it to him. Of course though, she felt the weaknesses of her own personality shine through. Unsure if she was able to give them all they needed beyond those that were physical, unsure if Alder would ever come out of the shell he hid behind. She could only hope.

Anu hadn’t thought of it recently, her mind moving form one thing to another as the two leader caught up on the recent pack happenings. But Savina brought her back, and she thought for a moment before realizing how serious it had all truly become and how she hadn’t noticed it until now. Yes, She said with a returning smile. It was odd that the two hadn’t discussed it before, but then the match seemed so easy and natural that the fact that the two had paired up was so easily accepted but the Lt. General. I think that they are. I haven’t seen Mati this happy, not since she was his size. She said as she looked at Alder. She was glad that her daughter could find someone, and she was just as ecstatic that the relationship drew her closer to her good friend. The fact that they were unconventional didn’t even seem to matter, experience and open mindedness ruling them fully.

At the words she spoke of Marcus Anu could not help but think back on the day she had met him at the beach. He makes a good pot of tea. Though it was my only taste of it, it was delicious. Anu had hoped that Kansas would agree to teach the pups how to read, and he had before they were even born. She felt it even more important that a male taught them lessons at every opportunity since they were all male and without a father. I hope. I know they need male influences, where ever I can find them. She spoke with a small smile.

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#12
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Being a parent could be one of the most nerve wracking experiences of someone's life. It was a lot of pressure, having other lives that you were completely responsible for. One mistake could cause irreparable damage, and even on her second time around she worried at every decision that she made. However, it was much easier to see things from the outside, and she knew that the three boys could ask for no better mother than the one that they had. Anu would give them all the love and direction and support that they needed. And, even if she were their only parent, the whole pack was here to help her along the way. Neither the Lt. General or her three sons would ever be alone as long as they were within the Dreaming lands.


Savina hadn't noticed how quickly things had moved either. Partially because of her busy life and looking after her latest trio of pups, but also the two seemed to have kept things between them fairly quiet from everyone else. Why that was she didn't know, but she wasn't going to question it. There was a small, very small part of the mother that was a bit wounded that her daughter hadn't come and told her of her budding love right away. The Commander wasn't going to let that get in the way of things though, and she was more happy than anything else. "The same with Cambria. I don't think I've seen her this way since...well, since before the accident," she said, her expression falling a little at the memory. That day had been one of the worst of her life, fearing if her little girl was going to survive or not. Cambi had never been quite the same after that. Her mood lifted back quickly though, smile returning. "I'm happy for them. They'll take good care of each other." There was no worries that either of them would abuse the other. It was the kind of situation every mother hoped for.


The raven woman's head tilted to the side at the mention of tea. "Tea? Is it some sort of drink?" She felt she had heard of it before, but she knew she certainly had never tasted the stuff herself. Europe was a much more humanized place though, except for small pockets where nature and tradition held strong such as her own birth pack. Savina could understand Anu's worries over masculine influences for her boys. "I'm sure all of the males here will do all they can to help," she said with confidence. "I wouldn't worry overmuch about it though. They will turn out fine with you as a mother, just look at Haven." To her knowledge the boy had had very little male influence in his life and he had become quite successful from the bits and pieces of news she heard of him. "Ehno did as well, and we didn't have many males of merit in our lives either. Just our English teacher." Savina wondered about the kindly man from time to time, and hoped that he fared well.

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#13
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In truth she would never know which mistakes or mishaps that her children went through were her fault, she hadn’t known in Mati’s litter and she wouldn’t know with the boys. But their older siblings hadn’t turned out wrong, even with the crazed blood that their father had given them, she and Naniko had done something right. And the white wolf had even turned against them, and still they were able to love and be loved completely. Now that Mati was with Cambria both she and Haven had fallen in love. True love that could be seen from miles away. and she was confident that where ever Salem and Brooklyn might be she felt that they were happy too. Anu needed to keep her confidence alive as she raised and cared for the boys.

At times it was easy to not notice the happy things, not while things in her own life were hectic and slightly crazy. It was just always easier to see when things so wrong. Though she saw it, knew that things were going smoothly (or so it seemed) for the two females, and was happy for them. But it wasn’t until she slowed down as she did in this moment that Anu was able to really see that what their daughters had was something extraordinary, Anu finally saw as the memories replayed in her mind, that Mait was in love and happy and had found meaning in her life. The same sort that Anu had found in the brown she wolf’s birth and the birth of her brothers. I believe they will. Anu said simply, reflecting on how such things had happened.

Anu nodded her head, It is, heated and made with some sort of tea plant I believe. She had truly enjoyed that warm drink, finding it refreshing and calming.

She had faith in her pack members, and always had. She wouldn’t have felt comfortable bringing the pups into the world if she didn’t trust them. From the start she had known that the Inferni leader would not be able to be present in their lives. She would not even expect him to meet them if he didn’t want to, and no one knew anything about him. She wasn’t shamed by it; she simply didn’t want to place the responsibility on him. Anu had always felt a special way towards the doggish male, feeling a need to protect him in any way she could. It was Savina and her mate and the others that gave her the strength that she did not ask of Gabriel. And she did not resent him for any of it.

I try not to. She admitted, still smiling and light hearted. Haven will help too. She said with a nod. I only hope to give them everything. I never want them to be without. it was a bit foolish for her to want so much, and she knew that realistically it was impossible no matter how perfect she could make their lives. They are such good boys already, I need to let them come into their own. I shouldn’t smother. Anu laughed slightly, knowing she needed to control her mothering nature.

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#14
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Wow, Savi stream of consciousness ramble XD 500+

She had always viewed children as such fragile things that couldn't take much before they would begin to break. Now that she thought of things though, perhaps they were so breakable as the mother feared. The litter Anu had raised with Naniko had certainly gone through more than their fair share of frightening truths and events. She couldn't say how Salem and Brooklyn fared, but both Haven and Mati had persevered. They both held respected positions in their packs and both were in strong, committed relationships. They easily could have fallen victim to the circumstances surrounding their birth and the fall of their birth mother, but they hadn't. They had risen above, and Savina couldn't help but to think that was at least in some way Anu's doing. For her, and her siblings, they too had had to deal with harsh truths growing up and disdainful treatment from their pack. Yet they too had all grown up into well functioning adults and she knew that none of them could have done so without the love and support of their mother. The parent-child relationship was lots of give and take, and she felt that each side relied heavily upon the other.


It was easier to see when things weren't right when one was so busy. Not only was it their duty to lead the pack and keep it in order, but they both had a trio of young pups to look after and raise. Neither of them were alone in that task, but it was still a full-time job that was made even harder when they were out and not with you all of the time any longer. Plus their girls had kept things pretty quiet, making it all the easier for them to inadvertently pass over the little signs in their minds. Still, when you looked back even those subtle hints made the picture clear as day. The Italian fey didn't really know what else to say on the matter at the moment though, and so only continued to smile warmly at her friend. It was good that the two were here, in Crimson Dreams. Here they would never have to worry about being ridiculed and looked down upon for their choice. Everyone here was more open-minded than to think that way.


"I see. Perhaps I will have to ask him to make me some of it sometime. I sounds pleasant." The only thing she had ever had to drink besides water was the wine that she had Kansas had shared on their little romantic escape those months ago. Her palate usually did not have any desire for anything else, but she was intrigued by the sound of this tea stuff. If Anu had enjoyed it, she had a feeling she would as well.


Savina had often wondered who was the father of her best friend's boys. It had been shocking news to discover for as far as she knew Anu had no interest in the male sex beyond that of friendship, and yet she had clearly given herself willingly to whomever it was that had sired the trio of pups. Curious as she was about the circumstances of their parentage, she didn't think she would ever come out and ask Anu about it. Really, it wasn't any of her business, and if the tawny woman wished to share his identity then she would without prying. The raven woman was more interested in respecting Anu's wishes and privacy than finding out about her romantic tryst.


She was glad to see that her friend wasn't too worried about the male influences in her sons' lives. "Good. Yes, I'm sure he will. He must be excited to have three new little brothers!" She knew that Cambria had been excited to become a big sister. Foolish as the wish Anu gave voice to was, it was one that every good parent held deep in their heart. They would move the Earth for their children if they could. "We all want that for our babies," she said with sympathy and understanding. How could you want anything less? Savi laughed lightly at her friend's last comment. "That's something I need to work on too. I was always exhausted when the pups were young, but now that they're not around as much I feel the desire to follow them around. It can be hard to make myself stay behind." It was a mother's job to want to baby and protect her pups, they could only do so much to help it.

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#15
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Marcus was an interesting creature. He had so many more things then Anu could even imagine possessing and he was far more traveled then anyone she had ever met. Usually those that had come from afar had made few or no stops before making their way to the region. But Marcus had been everywhere, and had called many places home. She was a simple creature, one that owned very few things and thought it unnecessary to own anything at all. She allowed small possessional pleasures, but it was not without minor guilt. Her father would have thought her greedy, urging her in his calm and subtle way to release the items and return to her roots and the ways of the Sun and Earth. But she was far more open minded, though the wolfess strived to hold just as much peace and contentment as he had.

Anu nodded, encouraging her friend to seek him out and ask for him to make some tea. She even thought about asking him to show her how to make it. When she mentions Haven, Anu remembered how he had reacted the moment she told him. Yet, with his mate’s help she had calmed his fears and explained the joy that she felt. It hadn’t taken him long to see that her happiness held no underlying shadows.

Their offspring would always be something that the two mother would think and speak of frequently, if not almost constantly. Anu did not want to be controlling, and she didn’t want to make things harder for them by not allowing then the space to grow and explore life for what it was. But the world was frightening, and held just as many dangers as it did pleasures. She listened to Savina closely, taking in the experienced mother's words. She smile meekly at the dark wolfess, I am going to try my hardest. She gave a small laugh at the words, knowing how hard it will be. I know they are safe here, and unfortunately we can not control the entire world but we can’t keep them from it either. Her tone was slightly guessing, wondering if that was the right mind set. She didn’t know if she could, but she would as hard she could.

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