Hollow and Alone

StarHowler · 08-21-2010, 04:18 PM

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For Samir<3

The air was thick and cool as the twilight hours took hold of the land. It was time for the changing of guard as night would slowly give way to day. For now though, it was not quite either as the large fem began the short trek back to her den. Her frame still as massive as it had always been, though her once filled out form was now lithe and bare boned. Her pelt dull and faded, though the faint purple cast of her back, that seemed more a trick of light than any true hue, still glistened faintly in the growing light. Everything about her had seemed to dim and dull with the passage of time. Even her eyes had a hollowed look to them. The lights were on, but no one was home.

In some ways she was lost and her mind had drifted far from where her body now was. Her spirit broken and hope for any sort of future was lost. She was nothing more than a primal creature now, driven solely by instinct. Without the desire for life, it was instinct alone that kept the body alive. She had searched for the answers to questions that had plagued her since her youth. A truth that in the end had destroyed her. Of all the thoughts and all the scares, nothing pained her as deeply as the sense of regret she felt for the one she had left behind.

There was an odd feeling in the night air, almost like it felt just before a rain. Kind of, but different. Lungs took a deep breath, causing ribs to show under the coarse coat of hair. A certain feeling within her caused her to halt. A slight flutter in the stomach, a nervous feeling that caused the hair along her back to raise ever so slightly. Ears heard nothing, eyes saw nothing but something told her she was not alone.

Samir Chaitanya · 08-21-2010, 05:35 PM

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      A pink tongue ran along dulled and worn teeth, mouth opening as he tested the wind a second time. Large nose was spotted and turning pink with age, weathered by many a storm and bleached by sunlight. It was cooler then he remembered the past summer nights to be, his thick pelt was grateful for it, the layers of fur had always been suited for days and nights of cold. But the world was different then his species that intended, his life had been different then he had intended. And now his life was nothing at all. He had fought to live, and he knew not why. He traveled over miles and miles, through a world that was covered with creatures unlike him, creatures who’s fear sought to finish him and caused him to retreat into a life of solitude. He had never wished for that, his nature was something that had once been known as cordial. But the beast had only become what all the others thought of him.


The predator told him it was time to feed, drawing him out of the thick woodland landscape. His orange and black pelt was apparent the moment he moved out of the greenery, darkness still not painting across the land with the fullest of opacities. Green eyes poured over the path that had been burned through the trees, nose falling and taking up the old and worn smells of the unlucky creatures that had walked it last. The further he traveled the cat uncovered scents that told him these lands were not without residents. Night had fallen fully now, and the scent of his enemy spoke to him. The large form paused, the memories that were written across his pelt in hairless lines brought an anger to him and he perused it. He should retreat, run from the canine that had time and time again spoke his claim of truce false and left him bleeding and marred.


She was alone, her scent so light and lacking any other wolf among it that the tiger could hardly believe it to be pure and alive. He would rid his newfound territory of the threat. A lone wolf was nothing for him to fear. His eyes met her in distance through the darkness, his true nature bringing forth a warning that was unlike any that could be brought forth by a native creature of the region. He warned the wolf, a piece of him remaining alive among the bitter anger that had been given to him over so many years, stopping him from stalking her any further. Stopping him from destroying her.

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StarHowler · 08-21-2010, 08:24 PM

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The world that surrounded her grew dark and silent. The calm before the storm. Though, it was not weather that blew across the lands. The quiet was deafening and it in itself was a warning that all was not right. The silence spoke to her and still the silvered fem did not move. As if it was fate itself that kept her feet rooted to the ground. Staring, unseeing into the darkness. The hair along her neck and back standing on end as the deep, unfamiliar call cut through the darkness. Ears swiveling in the direction of its source. Eyes quickly followed, searching for what lay just beyond their sight. A soft woof was huff from her lungs.

The fact that the call was clearly not canine was of some relief. Having suffered the most at the hands of her own species, it was her own kind that she feared worse than any other creature that might go bump in the night. She left the warning unanswered as she stared in the direction of its maker. The tension in the air was palpable and while a tiny voice in the back of her head told her she should leave she found she could not moved her limbs.

The seconds ticked by more like minutes. Every instinct in her body was telling the wolf to turn and leave. Yet it was a step forward that her body made, as if it knew what the mind could no longer comprehend. It was just one step, but that one step said that she would not simply turn away. A glimmer of light, and the wolf squinted trying to make out the dark silhouette painted on a black canvas. The slight and occasional glint of eye shine was all she could make out from the darkness.

Samir Chaitanya · 08-21-2010, 08:56 PM

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      His growl rumbled in his chest, lips uncovering the long canines that were likely twice the size of the ones that lived with in the wolf’s mouth. He called only once, then grew quiet as he watched her. Round ears stood forward, listening to the breathing and the heart beat that came forth from the canine, filling the silence that had settled in the sleeping forest. He didn’t recognize this place, the lands around the two something he had never seen before. The time seemed to slow, the movements of the female wolf just as deliberate and measured and he felt his own turn of an ear, lowering of a lip just as slow.


She did not run, but came forward as if she needed to search for the danger that stood before her. Did she not know that he spared her life, that he was giving her the ability to breathe another day. No, she came forth and with the taken step the tiger made his own. If she was to fight him then he would match each blood drawing swipe with his own. He did not fear her, it was the pack that he feared. But, he could not find the part of him that wanted to finish what time had done. She was tall but her form thin, her coat ragged. A lone wolf was a dead one, he had learned in the last many years. They were lucky beasts for he was doomed to solitary, no one wanted him. No one.


His mouth opened, teeth gleaming in the moon’s cast and his new call was one just as threatening though quieter and less enthused. Leave He said, his voice cracking mid word and ragged from lack of use.

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StarHowler · 08-22-2010, 02:45 PM

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The warning call had remained unanswered and no other creature of the night had yet dared to make a sound. The deafening silence stretching out as the ghost in the darkness seem to move closer. The wolf stood still as stone, ears pressed forwards searching for even the faintest sound of the silent, approaching predator. A shadow enveloped in black, it was hard to get a clear picture of what it was that was out there, stalking her slowly from upwind. Never before had she felt so completely and utterly blind and cut off from her senses.

She knew it was a cat and while she nearly the height of even the largest of the beast, she did not have the mass nor the muscle to fend off such an adversary. Even still she held less fear for this beast than she did for her own kind, but fear was something she had long ago lost. No longer did she fear the end, she had begun to wait for it. A single word was spoken from the darkness. The shadow a slightly clearer outline now. She shrunk back from the ragged and raspy voice, as it struck her like a bolt. Aged and worn with disuse, it still struck a cord. As if she had heard it once in a dream, long ago. Her mind reeled, grasping for answers to the feeling in her core. "Leave", it had told her and she found her self still unable to move in the right direction. Again and inevitably she moved forward again, not stopping til the creature came into plain sight.

Samir Chaitanya · 08-23-2010, 03:01 PM

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     His breath was heavy, taking in her scent and the cool air of night. Her scent was thicker now, the closer that she came. It was no longer lacking the life that he had once thought, his original judgment incorrect. But still it was not recognizable. The wolf did not speak, her voice absent even though he spoke in her language. But still the female refused, her paws bringing her a step closer, and closer to her death.

     The tiger became quiet, the only thing that he could hear was the beat of his heart. There was no fear, unafraid of the wolf and yet he felt the adrenaline beginning to seep into his blood stream, everything quickening. His breath was no longer heavy and slow but shortened and rushed as if he yearned to turn and run. But he wasn’t afraid, the wolf so frail and likely close to her end, even if he was not about to bring it to her.

     He had killed many, those that had been alone or strayed from their group. It was to save himself, and to ease his bitterness. To ease his need for revenge, to let him still believing that he did not need nor want the species. This would be the same, and this female was asking for her life to end. His mouth closed, green eyes staring and waiting for the wolf to take another step. He should taste her fear now, but there was nothing tainting the basic scent that she carried. The tiger tested her, taking a step himself and speaking once again.

     You're not afraid. She should be afraid, the end wouldn’t be painless.

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StarHowler · 08-30-2010, 08:54 PM

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<3

Fearless had never been a word to describe the silver and black wolfess. Fear, in fact, had ruled over her for most of her life. It was fear that had kept her isolated, a creature of solitude, unlike her family oriented brethren. Not only her own fear, but that of those that feared her. A peaceful creature it was her mere size that seemed to invoke the worst reaction for her own species and while she was capable of holding her own, confrontation was something she often avoided at all costs. But it was death she felt in the night air, though there was something almost palpable about the atmosphere that had settled over the two creatures. She did not know or understand what she was doing here any longer. But something bid her to stay and see out the conclusion of this day.

Step after step brought her closer and closer to the creature that had bid her only to leave. Part of her screamed to leave, to turn around and do as he had bid her to do. Runaway and start over again. The outline of the cat becoming ever clearer, the striped beast emerging from the shadow of the suns last dying light. She did not avert her gaze from his form as the timid female often did, but her eyes would not go as far as to meet his own as she approached. Her head and tail were low. Ears perked forward in curiosity, occasionally one or both of the gray audits would fold back. She stopped a few yards in front the massive cat. Despite her resistance to leave, the voice that was sealed and dry from lack of use had yet to break free.

Fear had yet to seep into her, but she was beginning to feel quite foolhardy as she stood before the striped cat. She had known such a beast before, but he had been a gentle soul. Not marred with scars and filled with hate. He spoke again, taking his own step forward. Whether it be the words or the step forward, something brought golden orbs to those of brilliant green. Inhaling sharply, she took a step back. The breath taken was held captive in her lungs as her mind reeled. Those eyes forever etched in her memory, she felt sure it could be no other, but her heart could not dare to hope.

She tried to speak, but nothing came out but a raspy exhale of air. Clearing her throat she tried again. The voice was faded and cracked from disuse. "S..Samir?" She took a tentative step forward, surely she must be dreaming.

Samir Chaitanya · 08-31-2010, 01:21 PM

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     The cat was nothing like the tiger of the past. His body stood at the same height, his form still rolling muscles and power beneath his orange and black pelt. But he felt hollow inside. His green eyes were what she might recognized, for they were brighter then fresh grass during a spring rain their glint clearer then the August sun, but they felt hollow. Dark holes with nothing sparkling behind them. He was the predator that they had thought he was, the predator that they had pushed him to become. The tiger didn’t laugh, no longer rasped his purr that spoke that he was content and did not believe he could remember what it was to be happy. Those complex emotions were lost to him. He was scent and sight and the things he heard. It was a live of indifference and fear, and pain and the only contentment he could know was something that resembled a full stomach. But he found no pleasure in the hunt nor the kill and feast.


He would not feel pleasure in destroying her, it was for survival. To ease the bitterness that had clung to him for years was not to make the pain stop, but it had become as necessary for the beast as breathing. Seeking the revenge was the water he drank, cool and metallic with the taste of blood. But just as his mind forgot why his body needed air and water he had forgotten why he wished to make her kind repent. A distant memory. But the memory was emotion and such things were lost.


It was time. He tensed, poising his form to take her quickly. She was seeking the true death, for her soul was gone already. It would tell her to be scared, remind her of the things that were worth living and plead for her body to turn and run. The wolf was dead already and the tiger was nothing but the barer of such a gift. She should and would be grateful.


Then, they were so close that he could feel her heart beat. And now he saw the hesitation and a spark of her body’s instinct coming forward. She was not as lifeless as he thought, her step backwards and a lighting of her features making him wonder if she was realizing how close she was to the gift that he held outstretched for her. Lips parted, and he allowed the last breath to come forth, allowing her one more before giving her the peace that this world had not allowed.


But, she spoke and he stood still. It was the only evidence of the shock that he felt. The sound of a name he had not heard for years held him back with the force of a beast twice her size and power. He had forgotten that, and he hadn’t known who that was for some time. The cat blinked, eyes growing clearer now and the green shining brilliantly still. How do you know that name? He asked, voice still wearing away the rust. Who was she to know his name of another lifetime? Samir was a creature of the past, someone that he had shed in the hopes of surviving.

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StarHowler · 09-12-2010, 10:23 AM

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Piercing green eyes held the she-wolf captive. They revived something deep within the creature that had become nothing more than a hollow husk. A flicker of hope, remembrance of better days when her life had known of happiness and contentment in the companionship of another. Before and after she had been a creature of solitude, but as such she did little more than simply existed. It was only in the time she had once shared with the tiger that she felt as if she truly lived and that her life held any amount of importance at all. Yet, it had been her, and not he, that had walked away on that day long ago. A day she had regretted since, but had been too stubborn or determined to try and turn it around. Instead she had left it in the hands of fate.

Star felt as if she were trapped within a dream, time seeming to stand still as she awaited some response from the tiger. Her heart pounded in her chest as a sort of fear began to creep over her. Fear of having been unforgiven, or worse, unforgiven. It had only been in her dreams that she had seen the tiger in the many years since her departure from the souls' territory. Though, they were never like this. No, in her dreams he had arrived like some great hero, saving her from the ravagings of the father she had once sought. This night was more of a nightmare in comparison.

It seemed an eternity before he finally spoke, though it was but a mere moment. The words were crushing, having quickly forgotten that time had not been kind to either of them and that she hardly resembled the wolf she had once been in her youth. Ears fell flat against her head. Giving a knowing nod as her head drooped ground-ward. "You have.. forgotten." Words spoken barely above a whisper. There was hurt, a pain she had forgotten could exist. An ache that grew from in the inside out and felt as if it was easily devour her. She could not find the words, nor bring herself to speak them, to explain who she was.

Samir Chaitanya · 09-12-2010, 11:47 AM

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     Marred and scarred face watched her. There were lines so deep that he had thought that they would be the end of him, and at time he wished it. His body was strong, powerful even with time and the cold of winters and the threats of the canines of these lands. Most scars were just painted lines rather then the furrows that cut him deeply. But he forgot how he had come to look, ignoring that there was a tattered and mangled look to him now. He was a cat, once beautiful and as sleek and graceful as a bird in flight, but he had lost that pleasurable appearance. Though he held to the innate ability to move with water like fluidity. But it was not his scars that made her pause, but the green eyes that held the dull purple that stared back at him.


She seemed to crumble at his words, the pointed audits falling and he could sense the disappointment in her. Sense something inside like he could feel it too, such a thing was long gone from him. Or so he thought. The cat shook off the unknown feeling and listened as she spoke. Why was she upset, he had yet to give her the news of her impending death and she had welcomed the notion of it just moments ago. But the thoughts, the process and the glee that he would gain from it had disappeared and when he returned to search for the ease of bitter feelings he could not find it, taking no pleasure in the anticipation of the wolf’s demise.


Forgotten, but what was worth remembering? Now he wanted to know, something stirring in his chest that reminded him of the organ that beat behind the boned cage. Who was she to bring these feelings to him, as small as they might be, they brought the words forth and where he wished to be powerful he fell to the same softness that she held. He felt weak, unable to stop the bleeding of theses new emotions. Life is so cruel. Remembering is, the tiger paused, finding the word. painful. But they were not new, simply unearthed. No one brought him to this place, a place that had been his demise so long ago.

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StarHowler · 09-12-2010, 03:43 PM

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She felt as if she were shaking, limbs growing weak and becoming unsure. Not having the courage to bring her gaze back up to his eyes. Those eyes were the one thing she had been unable to forget and now they would never gaze upon her in the same manner as they once had. It was a futile hope after all, that had kept her alive all these years. Once again their paths had finally crossed, yet he did not remember her and she could not speak the words that might remind him. A voice that even if it had been used and practiced would have trembled with the emotions that coursed through her frail frame, but in its disused stated was useless.

His words held a new tone and golden hued eyes looked up at the large cat, her head still hung low. The words were solemn and if she wasn't mistake there seemed to be a stirring in the orbs of brilliant emerald. She moved forward slowly, cautiously. Her steps shaky and unsteady. She brought her nose under his chin, the motion slow and easy. Trying to jog his memory in the only way she could manage and if nothing else to feel the warmth of his touch just one more time. With just inches between them she laid her head against his neck and chest before taking a deep, steadying breath. "Life is cruel, and I have only survived by remembering when it isn't." When I was with you.

Samir Chaitanya · 09-12-2010, 05:26 PM

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     He would be the end of her. The tiger had set out to kill her, as he had those other wolves that threatened his existence. She would go to them, call upon her species and chase him from these lands. But they were his, she was here to take them from him. The tiger needed to remind himself of this, to repeat the words again and again so that his stone facade would not crack. But he was wavering inside, crumbling bit by bit as he breathed in her scent and listened to the voice that willed him to remember. But he refused, couldn't bring himself back to a time where he had held such things as hope.


He couldn't. Couldn't allow his mind to wander back to those days where he held that hope and even happiness. They had been ripped from him, slowly. It was not immediate like the deathly choke hold that he would use to end her, but it had been like a slow bleed that left him weaker in each passing minute. The green eyed cat had moved constantly, leaving bits of that hope each day that passed and he didn't find the one that had opened that wound. This was not the day that he would reopen that cut, deeper then any scars that lined his body.

      She did not answer him, but moved closer. The wolf did not have the same lifelessness, she was unhappy and sorrowful but she was the empty shell that he had first met. She trembled, but it was her heart that shook and radiated through the air. She was so close now, and though she moved slowly towards him the tiger was surprised by the touch. No, he said, with a voice that screamed inside his head. Her words, they brought him back; for he refused to truly feel the touch that she gave him. No, he refused to believe that this was life and that this was what he had bleed from that gaping wound for all these years. The emotions were new and strong, over powering and his defenses against them weakened by disuse. Tell me who you are. for the rest was trickery, her scent, her voice, her eyes. They lied to him, shadows he had chased for so many years. If he allowed to believe it would be the end of him.

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StarHowler · 09-13-2010, 10:49 AM

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really dont know about this one...

The tiger was rigid against her touch, almost flinching away from it. It did not hold the warmth that memory told her should be there. What had time done to them? Or was she the cause of this? All his pain, the scars that littered the once pristine pelt of orange and black, were all these things her fault? It had been bold of her, to approach him but she had not known what else to do. It had been a mistake, bring her only further rejection. The frail heart her in chest was but moments from shattering, a broken heart would be enough to kill her. Bring her very bottom of her pit of desire. Only the finest threads of hope kept the fragile organ held together, but they were quickly fraying and unraveling.

She had wanted him to figure it out on his own. He too, had faded from her memory. Having long ago left her daily thoughts. Dreams of a creature that moved liked water with piercing green eyes that shone like emeralds were months, years apart. Never had been forgotten completely. Perhaps it was too much to expect he would remember her the same, if at all. She had taken a few steps back, assuming her touch was unwanted. "StarHowler." The words came out meekly. The name sounded almost foreign. How long had she heard it spoken aloud? She had lost all courage to look Samir. Afraid that not even her name would bring back memories that it seemed he had worked hard to forget. Hope was quickly fading within her now. Losing its last battle to keep her alive.

Samir Chaitanya · 09-13-2010, 01:32 PM

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     He was trembling now. Inside his feelings crested and waned like a storm’s tide. They had been woken by her presence, like a rebirth from the ashes that he had burned them to they plagued him now. He couldn’t describe them, and the tide only took a few moments to grow claws and rip along the inside of his chest, down along his gut to twist his stomach into a knot. He was afraid, more so then the tiger could ever remember. Afraid that she would speak of a live long gone and he would be forced to hope. But she moved away, and his chin lowered so that his green eyes look up at her bowed head. She moved away and Samir did not want her to, another re-imagined feeling, he wanted her where she had been. With the thought his hope flourished.

     She spoke, the name not painful to his ears not a stabbing sensation to his heart as he had anticipated. His frame of tension weakened, the dusty emotions strengthening and his mouth parted as if he was to speak. But his head only rose, his ears falling and his muscles growing soft. He wasn’t Samir, a beast from long ago. A lifetime that had ended, and the one he was now had been created from that death. But that had been when the wolfess she spoke of had died as well, the hope of her destroyed. He had searched for her for so long, the thought ran through his mind again and again. Green eyes could not fall away, even when he tried to tear them violently they stayed locked.


The tiger was fading, and is voice was not like it had been before as someone else tried to break through that stone façade. It was not filled with hate or bitterness, but sadness and even relief at the truth that her presence and her name gave him. I thought you were dead.

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StarHowler · 10-02-2010, 11:56 PM

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short

It felt as if she would choke on each breath she drew as she waited some sort of response to the name she had given. Did it mean anything to him anymore? Her fragile form rested back on its haunches, her tail wrapped tightly around her feet. Still refusing to look up from the ground before her. Her eyes were stinging and she kept them tightly shut, refusing to let him see tears stain her face.

Dead? She did not even know how to react, what to say. There had times she had wished that were the case, but it seemed her soul would not leave this body so easily. It was all her fault for leaving, for searching far and wide for what hadn't even been worth finding. "I..I'm.." She swallowed hard, struggling with swirling emotions of a lifetime of regret. None of it had been worth living, worth remembering, except the time she had spent with him. And she had thrown that life away for what? She didn't even know anymore. "I'm so sorry." The words came out rushed and ragged.

Samir Chaitanya · 10-07-2010, 10:10 AM

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There was salt in the corners of his mouth and on his tongue. The black markings of his face were deep and darkened from the stream of salt water that ran from green eyes. He hadn’t noticed that the dam bad been breached, he had thought he was holding them back. They fell freely and unrestrained, his body unable to keep them back no matter how strongly he willed it. They were paired with the weakening of his body. Through the blur he watched her fall to the ground, sitting as if hearing such a truth was too heavy a burden to carry. Samir, for that was who he was once again, blinked away the blur and looked at her downward face.

Her voice sounded like it had been drawn over gagged rocks, the words forming an apology. But there was nothing to say that would make the years gone come back to them, there were no words that would bring the life back to him. Words were not so powerful. Samir felt his large round paws move from their rooted place, he spoke it again. The same sentence rode against an exhale, I thought you were dead. soft, relief, a whisper of hope. He was in front of her, his nose touching her and taking in the scent that he had forgotten. His heart leapt, reawakening...

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StarHowler · 12-13-2010, 07:19 PM

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She shook her head desperately as she did not want to hear the words he spoke. Eyes still clamped tightly shut. In spite of the fact, salty tears still found a way to flow, seeping past alabaster lids. Staining her cheeks in an endless flow. "Not dead," she managed to choke out at last, "but a ghost all the same." For she was hardly a creature of this world, choosing to live in a world cherished memories than to deal with the harsh truths of reality. So much was forgotten, but never him. He tied her to this world.

The silvered female flinched at feeling his breath as he took in her scent, refusing to reveal her golden eyes still and her audits pressed closed against her head. She did not fear him. She feared his rejection. To all others she was useless. unwanted. trash. To him, at least once upon a time, she had meant something.

Samir Chaitanya · 01-07-2011, 11:35 AM

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     He was alive again, for the pain had returned and he would taste the salt of his tears. He had missed her, the scent of her, the sight of her golden gaze and the sweet tone of her voice. But those things were faded now. A ghost just as she said. Samir listened for the voice, and did not hear it. Yet he remembered and held the memory for tightly to his heart that he could hear her still. The tiger inhaled, his chest rising and falling like it had when he was the beast he had been with her those years ago. He was returning, and he felt that finally the light of day had come. Finally the world began to turn and the air in his lungs was no longer as thick and tarnished as soot. She may be a ghost, but even that thin apparition was enough to bring the predatory feline back to life.

     He felt the movement of his fur, the prickling along his neck that told him of a chill. He stepped in once again even closer, nose rising to touch her crown and emerald eyes closed as he used his other senses to find her beneath the embers and ash that had settled on her scorched and broken form. She had been burned away in his mind, lost in a fire that had eaten away at his soul. Slowly, beneath it all he could see her. Star. He breathed, calling to her in a whisper in the hopes that beyond the grave she would come back to him.

     Come back He wished to speak but his tongue was still. He fought through the pain, a mere pin prick compared to his want for her to regain life and his wish for her to return to him and the happiness that he felt for having even this faded corpse that had walked back into his world.

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