when I smile, tell me some bad news

Lolita Monroe · 10-01-2010, 02:05 AM

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All welcome, one or two only please. Marked as attn: Conor because I think it'd be interesting, but not required! Backdated to September 26. 300+ words.

The creamy woman knelt beneath the tree by the door to the large Victorian house where she had buried Orchid five days prior. By her side was the small blonde puppy wrapped in a small cloth. Lolita had woken that morning to find that, while three of the blind and deaf puppies were squirming and whining, one was motionless. Now Lolita knelt with the small figure of the now lifeless Iris beside her, lithe hands shaking as they dug into the soil a few feet away from where Orchid was buried. Her fingers worked slowly and clumsily, but she kept at the task, scraping up the soil and embedding bits of dirt beneath her nails.

Where tears should have been, there was only a dull stare, void of emotion. The Monroe woman had been struck dumb when she had realized Iris was gone, and she had not known how to react. The smaller twin girl had been only half there since her birth. She had never been as lively as her sisters, and she wondered if she should have expected this. Perhaps she should have, or perhaps she should have asked one of the pack's healers to look at Iris. Now it was too late, though, and as she finished digging the newborn-sized hole, she knelt back with her hands clasped in her lap, hands still shaking ever so slightly.

She could not bring herself to pick up the body. Lolita let her eyes rest on it and for the first time since realizing what had happened during their sleep, she wept. Fiery hair hung in front of her face as she let the tears fall freely, leaning forward and folding into herself. The sobs were hushed and quiet, but her shoulders visibly quivered. There was great sorrow in her heart.

Conor Soul · 10-01-2010, 04:48 AM

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It was mere coincidence that led her to the Monroe woman with the fiery hair. Carrying a few books that had perked his interest in a house a few blocks away, he had more or less been in his own world until his sensitive nostrils detected the presence of Lolita. She was a member that he had not interacted nearly enough with, and so he decided to let his hunger for the books’ innards wait for a little while. Tracing the woman’s fragrance with ease, he walked into a scene that he had not been prepared for at all. Was it fair of him to miss out so much on the happenings in the pack? True, he could not be everywhere at once, but he seemed to lack a good deal of updated knowledge about his fellow Dahlians.

Before him, Lolita was hurting badly. The young Soul male remained motionless for a moment as he took in the scene and tried to understand. Then, he saw the small, still form of a puppy. This was bad. ”Lolita..” the lavender eyed adult breathed softly, tones immensely sad as he witnessed the mother with her dead child. He was not certain of how to proceed from here, for they hardly knew each other. Still, she was alone and she was hurting. He could not turn from her and walk away. ”Oh, god..” the male whispered under his breath, slowly stepping closer to the two canine forms, wary of a negative response from the fiery haired woman. "What happened?"

Lolita Monroe · 10-31-2010, 08:34 PM

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300+

There had not been anything she could do, she knew deep within herself. The last puppy to be born had shared her birth sac with her sister Foxglove, and it seemed that sharing it had robbed the smaller girl of her life. She had been the least lively since birth; perhaps the Monroe woman should have expected this to happen. Her own state of afterlife should have been enough of an indicator that her pups may not be the healthiest, but she had been trying to take care of herself for as long as she knew about her pregnancy. She had stopped smoking, and had surprisingly continued to walk, and she had stopped drinking. She had done everything she could think of for the benefit of the puppies in her womb, and still it had not been enough in the end.

Large ears swiveled sharply at the sound of Conor’s approach, though she did not turn. There was too much pain in her heart, her body feeling weak and heavy, as if she could not move it. Her alpha moved closer, asking the expected question, and still she did not turn, jade eyes staring at the ground unfocused. “I don’t know… She was not lively when born. I woke this morning, and she… She was gone. Just like that. Just like her only brother, robbed of life before he was even born. Their three sisters… They’ll never know them,” she said, her voice sounding hollow to her own ears. This felt unreal to her, and the pain was more than she could even think to handle. The pain of it was not expected; she had never planned for these puppies, but she had loved them as if she did. “I’ll never know them,” she whispered, closing her eyes tightly. Orchid and Iris would never be able to know their mother or feel her touch, and she would never know theirs. It was not fair.

Conor Soul · 11-13-2010, 10:29 PM

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300+

The scene was very unnerving forthe young male. Fortunately the pale lady did not rise and make the scene dramatic. It would have been her right to do so, of course, for he knew that both instinct and sorrow could toss any soul into turmoil. She did not turn to gaze upon her leader. Her voice was heavy with her loss as it reached his ears. He could feel his hackles slowly rise in response to the tragic scene. Another moment passed before his form moved again, slowly nearing his pack member’s kneeling form. He knew little of how he would have reacted to a stranger if he had been in a similar situation himself.

She would never know them. At least she had known them for a few moments, but nothing like this could be less than unbearable. ”I’m so sorry..” but such words could not help the Monroe woman with the fiery hair. All she could do was to continue to live and take care of her remaining children. ”Not all children are meant for this world, Lolita,” he heard himself say, though it was not a secure move to make. She had all the right in the world to sit and feel on her deep grief. Acceptance was important before moving on. It sounded like the infant had been sick from the day she was born, and he regretted that he had not kept updated on the woman.

He wondered if he could have made a difference if he had known about the birth, but what use was it to think about it now when it was too late either way? There was little distance left between the leader and the member. He folded his hands together in indecision, continuously wary of the other. ”Their sisters can know them through you though,” he calmly suggested. A mother’s tales should not be underestimated. Lolita would remember, and what was shared with her children would not be forgotten. It was not a pretty tale to tell, but their worlds would not remain flawless and innocent for long. Even if her heart was torn, her late children would live on through her and their surviving siblings.

Lolita Monroe · 12-07-2010, 04:24 PM

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Anger would come later, as would denial and reasoning and bitterness. For now, all the mourning mother felt was the overwhelming grief consuming her heart, mind, and soul. She could not even bring herself to show her alpha the respect he deserved, but she could not feel bothered by this. She hardly knew the Soul man, but she hoped that he would understand why she did not behave in a manner that would have been expected in his presence normally. Lolita could not believe that he would think poorly of her for it, so she chose not to concern herself with that. There was too much else to be worried about Conor's opinion of her, though she was not one to care anyway. Being the alpha, however, meant something, so she normally would care.

His words hardly consoled her, but the creamy woman was so enveloped in her grief that she did not expect anything to ease her pain. She would never know her son or her fourth daughter, and though she had three healthy girls upstairs, she couldn't think of anything but her loss. She could not think of the joy she would find in her living children, only the despair she felt. "I will have nothing to tell them," she said softly. "I did not know them... Why did this happen?" she asked, jade eyes turning to Conor with obvious distress. She hardly expected an answer.

Conor Soul · 12-10-2010, 05:13 PM

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Usual procedures weren’t valid here, now. How could he console her when he couldn’t grasp what she went through? His form drew closer still, settling by her side, crouched down before the shallow grave. Death was only natural. The woman had to be grateful and celebrate the children that lived. It wasn’t unusual for puppies to die. The female’s soft voice was thick with her tears. The alpha swallowed uneasily, tried not to allow her despair to fully infest him as well. He was not indifferent to her loss, but right now one of them had to remain strong. Jade eyes found his lilac, and he allowed his hand to settle ever so lightly on her shoulder.

Life was part of this world as well as death. There was no valid reason why this had happened. It was just how things were. There wasn’t anything he could say to make this situation more manageable for the pale Lolita Monroe. The leader shook his head slowly as he looked at her face; couldn’t make things better. He could be here for her; be a shoulder to cry on. The Dahlian alpha did not know if there was a father in the picture here. That was one of the downsides of having a less strict hierarchy. Conor did not always sit on all the information he desired about his pack members, but more often than not he found that he knew enough.

”You’re strong—you will get through this.” His mind started to drift to herbs, mentally fetching ingredients for a warm drink that could soothe some of the pain in her upset soul.

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