torrential tears are meant to be shed.

[Anka de Sadira]

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For Melisande. I thought I might end up with Anya having her den right near Ceres' grave, so that's where she's starting. Location + weird emo lolcatspeak commentary! Lulz. I have no life... Oh, and... -- [WC: 730] --




ETA: Almost my entire post got lost because my fucking computer died, so... Ugh. I'll redo it. Done. Enjoy, this has been a project of 3+ days 'cause of doctors.




___It wasn't much. But it had never been much, really. Optime form as usual, dark girl flicked her eyes about the den, smiling vaguely to herself. Her thumbs slid into the pockets loosely. It was very small, just a little cave, two chambers. The front one, facing northeast, towards the graves of her grandmother, Ceres, and great aunt, Kiriska. She'd not known Kiriska, but she had been her grandfather Daituki's sister... he, she'd also never known. He'd been her mother's father... she wasn't sure if Aiji had ever known Daituki, either. She supposed it was of little consequence... Ceres, Daituki, Kiriska, and even Aiji were all dead now. And what was left? The aptly named demon child, Anyanka.




___She knew the story. Aud was a girl. Aud married Olaf, some troll-hunting asshole with an attitude. Olaf got drunk and fucked the barmaid, Rannveig. Aud got angry. Aud turned Olaf into a troll. The villagers didn't believe that the troll was actually Olaf. Olaf was chased out of the village. D'Hoffryn made Aud a vengeance demon. Aud became Anyanka. Anyanka took the wishes of scorned women, twisted them all up, then gave the women a loosely translated, highly destructive version of their wish.





___Fast forward past legends. Aiji was a girl. A princess, really; princess of Clouded Tears. Aiji hated being overshadowed by her family. Aiji left her family. Aiji moved to Chimera with her lesbian girlfriend. The alpha, Damian, had a son. The son was Ahren. Aiji went wandering one evening. Aiji found Ahren's mother's bones. Ahren found Aiji. Ahren raped Aiji. Aiji ran away. Anya was born. Aiji went crazy and died. Wasn't that just the coldest possible way to put it. Her mother was dead, because of her. Her mother had died crazed and in pain, because of her. Cold... but too true. Too fucking true.





___Anya's voice was hoarse. She'd had a bit of a screaming match with Ceres' grave recently, ending with her apologising to her dead grandmother, who hadn't been saying anything anyhow, except in the girl's mind. Grave stones were painfully silent. It made her a special form of sick, really. She glanced around the den chamber... then grabbed her bag and pulled something out. A stone. It was smooth to the touch, and it had an image on it, painted on in bright colour. An image of an adult female, snowy white pelt and deep blue eyes. Her head was resting gently on another, a bit younger, with a dark pelt and bright golden eyes. And still yet, another... a pup, with crimson eyes and the same dark pelt, curled against the other two. They looked happy.





___That had never been the case, but... it made her feel good to look at the image. It had been made for her by the only wolf she could have ever have considered a 'friend'... and they'd turned on her, when they'd found out about her past, and that that painted image was not of her real family... but what she'd wished it could have been. Ceres, Aiji, Anya. Family. Three generations of loving... oh, fuck it. It wasn't like that. It had never been like that. It would never be like that.





___Anya's thumb ran over the image on the stone, a tear stinging the corner of her eye, then she turned from the den and walked towards the grave site again. This was the closest den she'd been able to find to Ceres' grave; the walk wasn't far. Sitting down in front of Ceres' grave cross-legged, she looked at the image painted on the stone again. Sighing softly, she spoke.




___Hello again, Gran'mama. She still called her that, like she had as a pup. It didn't feel right to change that. I've found a home. I live nearby, so I can visit often. It was true. Short of Jasper, she had no family... and she didn't know any of her family on her mother's side. Except Ceres. She spoke quietly, with respect, just as she would have if Ceres had still been alive. I hope I didn't hurt you earlier. I brought something to show you. She held the stone out in both palms, as if her grandmother could see. It's you, me and Mama. I know it never got to be like this... Silence, then a soft sigh, laced with words.




___I'm sorry.

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[Melisande Sadira]

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Wow, that post nearly made me cry. Good job. (Wc 350)

indent Melisande hadn't been visiting Ceres' grave quite as often lately, which, although she felt a little guilty in a way for that, was really a sign of improvement. She was starting to be able to make it all on her own again, and had even reclaimed a den recently. It was close to the lake, but also not far from Ceres and Kiriska's grave site. For a while she'd come to the graves hoping to find her father there, like she usually did, but lately he wasn't anywhere to be found. Then she came there for comfort, to vent her frustrations, to ask questions she already knew the answers to. Lost memories hurt, and her eyes always stung when she left, but today wasn't a bad day. Today was a day she knew she would make it through.
indent She had planned to go there, and update Ceres, grandmama, on her life. She would tell her about her conversations with Laruku, about having a new den, about her thoughts on moving forward. She padded quietly toward the familiar place, but then she heard a voice saying the words she wanted to say. Grandmama... no one called her that but Melisande, did they? She had a moment of instability, before deciding that she was not insane, and that it was not her own voice telling her exactly what she'd wanted to say. She hurried forward, thinking that perhaps it was her sister Mew. But it wasn't, unless Mew had altogether changed into the opposite color.
indent The other wolfess announced that she'd brought her something, and proceeded to show it. Melisande looked away and back again awkwardly, wishing she'd hidden her curiosity. "I'm sorry... " She looked back, realizing that it was too late to run off now. Either way, the other wolf had called her by the same name Melis did, so they were obviously related, weren't they? "She's your Grandmama too?" It was all she could think of to say, and she hoped it wasn't too invasive. The last thing Melisande ever wanted to do was stir up trouble.

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[Anka de Sadira]

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Awr, Melis is cute. Sorry if I smudged your makeup a little. -Pets.-




___Anya couldn't have whipped her head around faster if she'd wanted to; it would have broken her neck and flown away. Someone... apologising to her? Being compassionate? Must be Ahren's sick joke. This girl was sorry? Anya gave the female the basic up-and-down, quite the normal action for a girl as paranoid as Anya had to be. This girl, she couldn't have been much older nor younger than Anya, either way. Her eyes had a frightening, creepy likeness to those of her mother, their golden tones reflecting... but they held a bit of red, a bit like Anya's own eye colour. Her pelt was pure white, and reminded her too much of Ceres... a sick joke, surely. It couldn't be real...




___Anya spoke carefully, her voice low. "Yes, she's my Gran'mama t... wait." Her eyes narrowed. This girl was related to Ceres? Her granddaughter? Like Anya... 'Spite you, Ahren, should this be for your twisted amusement,' she thought. Then she turned her full attention to the female, and nodded slightly, as if to invite her company. "Ceres is your grandmother... How?" Obviously, she knew about reproduction, but she had never met this girl, nor any of her mother's family, save for Ceres, and mayhap a few others she'd not committed to memory. It seemed surreal... "I'm Anya," she blurted out, and she instantly regretted not being careful, not being cautious. Something about the ivory female reminded her of the comfort Ceres had provided, and she just couldn't bring herself to be threatened.




___It seemed like everything was a whirlwind, and Anya stared at the stone she'd been showing Ceres -- or, more accurately, Ceres' grave -- before the arrival of this phantom. Staring at the image, she smiled a little. Maybe this was her grandmother's way of showing her that sometimes, chances fade... but that's no reason to give up trying.

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[Melisande Sadira]

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indent Melisande was mostly glad that this other wolfess was alright with having company. She came a little closer as she spoke, wondering how this femme could possibly be related to her. The vast majority of her family was white, or at least grey, and this girl was the... the black sheep, she supposed. Was that even the correct usage of the phrase, she wondered? Melis decided not to say it out loud, either way. It didn't seem like a compliment.

indent "I'm her son Lisichka's daughter, Melisande Sadira?" She came to stand next to her inverse, and looked down at Ceres' grave. She missed her grandmother, and as much as she always came here expecting to feel better, she always felt the familiar pain and sorrow when she looked down at the little mound of earth. "And you? How are you related?"

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