Here I Am; This Is Me

Ralla · 06-02-2011, 09:47 PM

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(Nootau: Not Visible) Ayasha gets first post, and then it's whoever wants to meet some pups <3 Forward-dated to the 8th

It was finally time! All three of the pups were old enough to venture from the den--aka, the confines of the tree hut--on their own four feet. Still wobbly, they were little more than little balls of fluff; barely able to move without tripping over large puppy-paws or stumble from lack of leg strength. It was absolutely endearing. They would now be allowed to play outside of the hut with supervision, even though Ralla had made it a point to get them in fresh air as often as possible anyway. Still, since they had to remain in lupus form, someone had to carry them up and down the hut manually. Once they were older, they would have to spend some time in the Town Hall until they could shift, since getting them up and down the tree hut would be impossible once they were bigger and still restricted to lupus form, but for now, they were being granted the privilege of their first freedom.

First to explore was Ahiga, who had already established himself at the top of the pecking order. Mostly white, the only grey on him that distinguished his appearance from his twin's was the grey sock on his left foreleg and the grey rimming his eyes. Alaster--more reserved and timid--only had the grey sock on the right foreleg to mark him, since both had the same forest green eyes as their mother. And then Aleu was the easiest to tell apart. She looked like her grandfather from Ralla's side, but had bright, sapphire-blue eyes that didn't come from anywhere in Ralla's family, and so was attributed to Kemo's side. Ralla assumed they were Kemo's eyes, even though they had since turned white from his blindness. But still, different as she was, she was hers and special in her own way. Taking her own first wobbly steps--trying to follow her brothers, who were far larger than her even at this stage--Ralla smiled sympathetically as she flopped downwards and began to whine in the high-pitched sound that little pups made when upset. How often she had heard that when she was feeding the little ones; a cry for attention or distress, only to find that it was far less troublesome than made to be. But Ralla didn't mind; such things would be taught with time. For now, just getting them up and about was the goal.

Moon walks. "Moon talks." Moon thinks.

Ayasha · 06-02-2011, 10:00 PM

Ayasha was highly amused by her younger siblings. They were definitely a handful and she loved them all dearly. She rather liked Ahiga. He was rather rambunctious, like her. So when the twins needed separating, which was quite often, she would grab Ahiga and let her mother handle Alaster, even if he was easier to handle. She knew that today was a big day for her siblings and was ready to help her parents.

Mom, need me to take Ahiga down for you and then keep them occupied while you bring the rest down? She was currently tickling Aleu and making faces at her brothers. She grinned down at her smaller sibling. You maybe small, Aleu, but with my luck, you'll soon be way bigger than me. She kissed her on the head and waited for Ralla's answer.

Ralla · 06-07-2011, 04:41 PM

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Still open to other peeps Tongue Also: I hereby give Ayasha pp powers over the pups in this thread :3

Ralla laughed gently as she saw Ayasha playing with tiny Aleu, belaying her response a little as the young girl squealed a little. "Ayasa!" she screamed with mirth, not having the speaking skills to yet say her older sister's name right. The pups were just learning to speak, and it was so entertaining to hear the little pups fumble over the words. She could only imagine how silly it would be when they began to learn AniWayan. "If you would, sweetheart? I swear, these pups grow up so fast!" Picking Alaster up by the scruff of his neck, the compliant twin let himself hang, little back paws curled up protectively over his stomach. "Momma? We going outside?" "Yes, little one. Outside." In order to safely bring each pup down, she would have to make two trips, since Ayasha was already brining Ahiga down. The boy was certainly dear to her heart, but she swore that he could squirm more than a worm. Once all safely on the ground, each pup began to sniff about as if it were their first time. Although it hardly was, Ralla couldn't blame them, since this would technically be the first time they were allowed to wander about the 'den' on their own four feet.

Watching them all go about, Ralla took a leisurely seat and watched them all, letting them do their thing and familiarize themselves with the small territory of the hut's proximity. "What do you think, Ayasha?" Ralla asked her daughter as she viewed the scene. "What do you forsee their futures as?" It was a question of simple curiosity; one made of pure impulse and not much else. Ralla so rarely saw her daughter any other time other than night because their duties kept them both busy, but she craved the time they spent together.

Moon walks. "Moon talks." Moon thinks.

Ayasha · 06-11-2011, 09:33 PM

Ayasha grinned down at Aleu as her sister screamed her name, albeit not perfectly. But she was just beginning to talk and so it was hardly her fault. Plus, it was absolutely adorable. She stood up and picked her wildest sibling by his scruff. He of course tried to playfully bat at her, which he was unsuccessful at doing. When she got down with him, she set him down on the ground and sat next to him. Ahiga decided that he would try and wrestle with Ayasha and so he jumped on her. She giggled as she allowed him push her down and try and tickle her. Alaster, once Ralla brought him down, decided to make it a puppy pile. Alright, you two. How about we don’t squish big sister? She gently removed them and they wrestled with each other.

Her mother sat down and Ayasha sat next to her. Ralla’s question was a bit surprising. Um, I think they’ll all be bigger than me. She resigned to being small. Though her being small brought to her attention something that she needed to tell her mother about and maybe get some advice. Mom? I need to tell you something. A few weeks ago I met a white wolf from Phoenix Valley named Roran and we like each other. We’re planning on being mates when I’m old enough. She was rather anxious about what her mother would say about that.

Ralla · 06-12-2011, 11:02 PM

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*Ralla spews coffee at the last sentence* o.o

Chuckling, Ralla pet Ayasha comfortingly on her head. "Maybe. But you'll do fine; you just have to establish the order," she said as she saw Ahiga demonstrate as much, taking Alaster's muzzle into his mouth in the sign for dominance. It was a normal and encouraged thing for pups to do, since it began the development of their social skills while also jump-starting them on how a pack's ranks were enforced. "And we don't know about you entirely yet, sweetheart. You're still growing, too. You never know." Ralla wouldn't be surprised if the girl shot a foot up in the next month or so. If she didn't, then there was no harm done at all; Ayasha would still be Ayasha.

"Oh? From Phoenix Valley?" At first, when Ralla heard Ayasha say 'like' she assumed it was in a platonic way. She was about to continue and encourage the friendship, but Ayasha beat her to the punch, and had the white mother not already been sitting down, she would've probably fallen flat on her backside. Turning her eyes incredulously to her young daughter, Ralla wasn't upset or angry; just...daunted. From Phoenix Valley? she reiterated in her mind. Where's Nootau when you need him most!? True; where was the spirit guide? Ralla felt that now was probably as good a time as any to give her guidance. Had Kemo been there at that exact moment, she probably would've had to hold him back from going straight to Phoenix Valley right then! Clearing her throat, Ralla thought hard on how to address this. "Well, sweetheart... You're still very young and have a very long time to think about mateship," she managed to get out, stumbling over some words with her usually eloquent tongue. "Umm...." Pausing, she considered Ayasha's age and how she might react to such things as hostility or refusal, and wanted to avoid the crushing of dreams at all possible costs. Sighing, she came up with a personal compromise. "I'll tell you what: If I meet this boy and like him, and if you two still want to do this when you're older, I'll approve. But only if those conditions are met," she said sternly, the images of Shiloh's discovery still fresh in her mind. "If I find any reason that this boy will put you in danger, my answer is no." Granted, Ralla would not purposefully search for a reason to say no, or limit these conditions to just him. Ever since the trespassing of the borders awhile ago--on several occasions, actually--she had grown much more protective of her pups and tribe. Granted, Phoenix Valley was an ally and close brother-pack, so Ralla did not credit much harm to the young affection as dangerous. If anyone couldn't tell, Ralla was a complete newbie at mothering...

Moon walks. "Moon talks." Moon thinks.

Ayasha · 06-17-2011, 09:02 PM

OOC: hehe. at least she didn't say that she was preggers.

IC: Ayasha gave her mother a pout as Ralla laughed at her. How do I establish an order with pups younger than me? Her voice was confused and her brow was furrowed at her mother’s words. She giggled at her brothers’ show of dominance. It was almost as though they knew what their mother and older sister was talking about. She nodded at her mother’s words about her not growing, not completely believing her but not wanting to continue with that line of thoughts, at least not right now.

Ayasha nodded in blissful ignorance, as she thought about Roran, not aware of the troubles and worries that she just caused. But she figured something was wrong when she got a look at Ralla’s face. Her ears fell flat on her skull and she frowned at the look. But she replied to her mother’s concerns. Those plans are very flexible and not set in stone. We would just like to eventually. She hoped that would help somehow and in someway. Her whole face and body perked up at her mother’s stipulations. I think we can manage that. I already told him to wait to do anything until I talk to you. She also offered. He wants to join the Tribe for me, mom. Ayasha then thought of something. She hadn’t seen her father, Kemo, around lately. Mother? Where is father? When is he coming back Her voice turned concerned and her eyes were filled with uncertainty. Is he coming back?

Ralla · 06-21-2011, 04:32 PM

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Ralla. Would. DIE. o-o

Ralla shrugged again in accordance to Ayasha's question of the dominance. Quite honestly, she didn't know either, since she had never had younger siblings. It had always just been her and Noss, and Noss had done the dominating quite well just by being...him. Even in his early years Noss cut an intimidating figure, and... Come to think of it, Ayasha's never met Noss... That thought stuck in her mind. Although Ayasha and the pups had J'adore as their Edutsi, and by extension Leon and Mizu as a part of that family, they had never met their blood kin, and thereby Ralla also felt bad because these were Noss's family here, too. Even if he was not exactly a 'family man', wouldn't anyone want to meet their kin?

Getting up after a spell to catch Ahiga--who had attempted to hop away from the bounds permitted him--Ralla picked the pup up from underneath his arms and brought him back to sit with her, turning him upside down and ticking his stomach as he struggled without much result. Ralla regained a calm demeanor as Ayasha began to speak again, even as Alaster and Aleu came tromping their way to get in on Ahiga's fun. Ayasha's look was not one of anger or frustration, but...something that the mother just couldn't put her finger on. It didn't change much; the conversation continued. "Well, he sounds like a nice boy," she said while petting Ayasha's head, tucking loose strands of hair behind her ears, thus allowing Ahiga time to escape and to jump right on top of poor Alaster. This, of course, led to another wrestling match, which somehow Aleu joined in on and made it a huge rolling ball of puppies. "I'm sure we can welcome him in. Tell me more about him?" The purpose of that was mostly to tell what Ayasha thought of the other wolf, but also to assuage Ralla's fears a little. She was a mother; she was entitled to a little interrogation.

And then it was asked: Kemo's disappearance. The smile instantly disappeared from Ralla's face and she let her hands clench each other in her lap. Forest green eyes did not meet Ayasha's sharp blue, and her head was slightly turned away, as if in shame. Just the other night she had read into the stars and seen the truth; the terrible truth that she had been denying. "Your father's..." Oh, how did she explain this? The readings could only tell me one word; no details whatsoever--not whether he's dead or injured or in danger or anything! But... But...! Oh, how she wanted to deny it more; was still in a stage of pseudo-denial. This question... It would mean admitting it to someone other than herself, and it was far more painful...far more final. He was her first love--her first mate and father to her children--and still...it turned out like this. She didn't know how to deal with it, much less explain it to a child when only one word had come from the readings and from Nootau's infinite knowledge; the one word that had come to her as the answer to her question pained her, and there was nothing she could do about it. "He's not coming back..."

Gone.

Moon walks. "Moon talks." Moon thinks.

Ayasha · 06-30-2011, 12:19 AM

OOC: Roran's player and Roran have disappeared.

IC: She looked up at her mother’s face and wondered what she was thinking of. What are you thinking about, mom? She cocked her head to the side. It looked to her like Ralla had an epiphany about something and Ayasha was itching to know why.

At Roran, she nodded. He is. But I haven’t really seen him recently. Does he still like me? She was worried slightly about that but hoped that it wasn’t the case. At his description, she gave a slight grin. He’s like a huge me. He’s really big and white. He recently became Luperci to help protect his mother, Jace. He’s really nice and doesn’t want to hurt anyone unless its absolutely necessary. She grinned as she thought about their previous encounters as Alaster came up to her and begged her to play with them.

So she sat next to them and tickled them when they came near her. Her ears perked up as her mother started to talk but slowly drooped as Ralla explained where Kemo was. He’s gone? She didn’t like her mother’s explanation. Where did he go? Why did he leave? Will he back? She was worried and went over and laid her head in her mother’s lap.

Ralla · 07-15-2011, 01:28 PM

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Woops @-@ You'd think a post log would help me better -_-

"Your uncle," Ralla answered as she continued to mull the thought over. "Not Edutsi J'adore, your blood uncle--Edutsi Noss. He lives in Cour des Miracles and came from the same place I did, far, far to the south. I was thinking that it might be good for you four to meet him soon. Fair warning, though," she said with a mischievous grin, "he's not exactly Mr. Touchy-Feely. He's none too good with kids either, but...I'm sure he'll love you kids." At the very least she hoped. Ayasha's tendency to ask a lot of questions might grate of Noss's nerves a little--his patience was oh-so-very limited with children--but he would probably have his hands full with Ahiga, who probably was more like a young Noss and Kemo mixed. He'll be trouble, she thought with a sigh. On the other hand, perhaps Strelein would also like to see them? Ralla didn't have a very broad idea of Strel's patience, but mayhap he might be able to take Ayasha's questions better than her brother.

Ralla giggled at the hot and cold reactions she got from Ayasha concerning the boy. She had never felt these things when she was that young, but she could only imagine the confusion. "That's a good reason," Ralla said with a smile. "In the old tales, this form was granted to us by the moon because it was our turn to become the guardians of the earth. By extension, being granted the gift for such a reason is admirable. But I want you to keep in mind, sweetheart; it's never alright to hurt someone. If you and your siblings were in danger, of course I'd come to your rescue and use whatever means necessary. But if I hurt someone, it is not something to be happy about. Even our food we must thank; it is what sustains us and gives us life." These were old teachings that Ralla had been taught when she was a pup; spiritual and traditional, with wisdom in the very words.

Ralla turned her head down to her lap and lifted her hands, a pause taking hold before she let them stroke Ayasha's head soothingly. She felt the warmth from her daughter and heard her words, and the children played on--still too young to comprehend such emotions. Perhaps it's better that they're so young... At least they weren't given the time to become too attached... How it would've broken them had they been even a little older to know that their father was gone. But Ayasha was old enough to understand, and had known Kemo a little more intimately than her younger siblings. "I don't know, Ayasha. I don't know. I... He's not coming back, Ayasha. Not that I have seen. And there's nothing we can do. Your father..." How did she explain this? Kemo certainly had demons to contend with, but she didn't want her children to think of their father like that. "He's a good man. A brave, loving man. But there are some things we can't change in the world." Ralla refused to cry in front of her children; to show them the weakness in her heart. She could not help them if she was incapable herself.

Moon walks. "Moon talks." Moon thinks.

Ayasha · 07-18-2011, 12:31 PM

OOC: I hope the PP of the pups is still OK? And want to wrap it up soon?

IC: Ayasha took the news of her uncle with surprise. I have an uncle? Why haven’t I ever heard of him or met him? She wasn’t accusing but more curious. Her eyebrow went up at the mention of not being touchy-feely. Am I touchy-feely? She probably was. But when her mother sighed, Ayasha nuzzled her while questioning what was wrong with her eyes.

Ayasha nodded in agreement about it not being good to want hurt someone. I understand. And I’d come help rescue my siblings and you if they or you are ever in trouble. She grinned while watching her siblings. They were a bit rambunctious, especially Ahiga and Alaster. But Aleu would join it without too much convincing.

She frowned. Do you miss him? Was it something we did? She hated to think that she might be the reason that her father left. But she nodded at him being a good man. What are we going to do? She had lifted her head to look at her mother but laid it back in her lap. Her siblings came over and, as if they could understand that something was wrong, snuggled against Ayasha. She looked down at them and promised. I will look after the three of you. she then stroked Aleu’s head much like Ralla was stroking her’s.

Ralla · 07-26-2011, 11:30 AM

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Archiving a day after this post ^^ And yep; pp is fine. The song below is not AniWayan, but will be posted permanently to Ralla's profile since she sings it so often >_> (Sora, by Yoko Kanno)

Ralla giggled a little at Ayasha's incredulity. "I suppose I just never mentioned him, have I?" How silly of her. "It's not a bad thing, sweetheart. Your personality is warm and loving, and although your uncle can love, he does not often show it, and even then not in the way we're used to." Noss was a very stoic individual by nature, and was not used to showing love the way that Ralla had raised her to experience it. Perhaps he would upset Ayasha--he was not one to guard or mince words, either--but maybe if Ralla were there he would watch himself closer. Ralla never wanted Ayasha to lose the part of her that was loving and accepting; it was a precious gift. "I'm glad to hear that," the white woman said in response to Ayasha's promise of bravery. She believed it, too.

"Of course I miss him," she whispered while smiling, although the smile was one more of wistful sorrow. "You did nothing wrong," she assured her daughter. "You children could never do anything wrong that would make him turn away. No, he...he left for his own reasons that I suppose he couldn't deal with here." That fact hurt Ralla because it meant that he couldn't let her help shoulder the burden he carried anymore. He had at one point, but she knew him; a white knight, who hated to see others hurt. Perhaps she herself had upset him by taking on the burden, but she had wanted to. "We're going to stay a family," she said firmly, "because we are still one. No matter what other people say. We will all follow our paths without faltering." It was all they could do. According to the tribal laws, Kemo was now very much shamed in their eyes because he had abandoned his family. But now Ralla, too, and her children were shamed, even if they had done nothing wrong. But Ralla didn't believe that she and her children were shamed at all, and would fight hard to prove to everyone that they were still the same as they were before, if not better. She would live with their burden and prove to everyone that they could be just as great with it. Looking down at her children--the pups seemingly already tired out from their play--Ralla began to sing the lullaby that had captivated her and that she had used to lull them all to sleep, feeling the warm summer air caress them like a hand on a cheek.

"Win dain a lotica,
"En val tu ri,
"Si lo ta.
"Fin dein a loluca.
"En dragu a sei lain,
"Vi fa-ru les shutai am,
"En riga-lint."
"Win chent a lotica,"
"En val turi,"
"Silota."
"Fin dein a loluca,"
"Si katigura neuver,"
"Floreria for chesti,"
"Si entina."

Moon walks. "Moon talks." Moon thinks.

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