A cool wind blew over the ocean waters, salty air whipping through the hybrid boy’s fur. He padded silently along the shoreline, eyes taking in the lapping waters and the soft sand. It wasn’t often that the boy drifted out to the sea. His escapes from the musty caverns of Anathema usually led him into the cool forest areas, but today he wanted something different. Initially the boy wanted to follow his father out and help him with a hunt, but on his way out he changed his mind, feet taking him south out of the packlands and to the shores.
Papa said he should be getting old enough to shift, but the youth still couldn’t seem to do it. Luckily, Agony didn’t seem to be having any luck with it either, but the thought didn’t bring the boy comfort for long. It only made him more anxious to finally make the change to his two-legged form. He had to do it before his sister. Then he would at last have some definitive proof that he was better than her. It would prove that he was more grown up, and then she would have to listen to him and finally acknowledge his leadership.
The thought left the youth both hopeful and frustrated. The hybrid boy stood there on the soft sands, blue eyes staring out across the water as if it would reveal to him the secrets he needed. Jackson closed his eyes, deciding to concentrate on changing, hoping it would happen. He imagined the bulky secui form his father sometimes used, picturing himself with such strong limbs and thick fur. Then he called to mind a picture of what he imagined his optime form to look like: tall with lean, strong limbs and a lengthening mane. He held on hard to that image, trying to think of how his four-legged form could turn into that and willing his body to follow the process playing through his thoughts.
Minutes ticked by and the boy finally sighed, opening his eyes. Nothing had changed. Jackson remained standing on the same four legs as he had before. One paw kicked at the sand in agitated defeat and he settled himself down on the ground. He laid his head atop his paws and stared across the water with mournful eyes. He was never going to be able to do it, was he?
OOC: I hope you don't mind a panda coming in her and talking to little jackson <3 +3
When your world comes all undone, let me be the one to say, 'I'm not jesus, you can't run away!'
She was on a mission, like always. Her mission today was to get some salt water, and to also take some time away from Venom to get her head straight, and to just relax on the beach. She knew that she wouldn't have too long without the male following behind her, possibly an hour or so at most but that was all she needed really to straighten her mind and whatnot. She was in her Optime form, and she had been dressed in her black shorts and she had her plaid shirt open on her shoulders and her satchel on her side. Within her satchel she had herself a sketchbook and a pencil and then a jar of marijuana and some papers to roll it into when she decided that she wanted to smoke. She also had a lighter somewhere along the other little trinkets that she brought along (her pendulum, for example) in the bag that she thought that she might need, or just wanted to have in case of emergency. She walked along out of Anathema lands with ease, following a trail along to a beach that she hadn't been to before, and because of this fact, she found it rather necessary to mark her way so she knew the way back home.
When she hit the shores of the beach, she let a soft smile place itself on her maw and she walked down the beach, along the water line so that her feet would get wet, but nothing else on her body would unless the waves came up too high, but they didn't so she was mostly dry, only about to her ankles was the highest water spot on her body at the moment. The woman gracefully moved along the beach, trying to find the perfect spot that she was supposed to sit and meditate. She would end up going pretty far out, until the ocean breeze had uncovered an Anatheman scent that was unfamiliar to her. She cocked her head and decided to seek this individual and see who it might be. Panda was a social being in the end of it all, so she was not against meeting another member of her 'family'. It'd only take a few more minutes of walking for the woman to finally get a visual on the being whose scent was on the wind. He was young, and rather interesting looking. Pretty cute though with his floppy ears and all.
She quickened her pace to where she would come to two yards from the boy. Hey, you're from Anathema too, right? My name's Panda...Who're you? she asked in a friendly tone, a smile on her face as she looked at the freckled lupus boy.
The Anatheman boy remained where he lay on the soft sand, miserably considering himself to forever be beyond the ability to shift. He had been eagerly awaiting the day ever since he first realized that he too would one day have that ability. It was the one thing aside from the eventual appearance of his remaining sibling that he could look forward to, and he hardly had the patience to wait any more. He wanted to run about on two legs, create things with his hands, tend to the cavern’s numerous fires, and practice wielding a blade. Yes, he could imagine it now, just how great life would be once he could turn. He would be an adult! No more being treated like the bumbling kid that he refused to believe he was.
Jackson hardly noticed the footsteps above the sound of the gently lapping waves before him. Wallowing in disappointment and giving in to flights of fancy seemed to require the majority of his attention. So the monochrome hybrid thought himself to be alone until the woman was within a few yards of him, introducing herself. His head snapped up from where it rested on his paws, blue eyes turning to view the stranger who had approached him. Floppy ears stood up slightly as he listened to her friendly words. The familiar pack scent indicated the truth of her words, but the boy was certain that he had never seen her around Anathema himself. She was tall with coat colors similar to his own and wore shorts and an open shirt (Clothing—something else that was still beyond his reach, he thought with a hint of jealousy). Most interesting, though, were the ears and tail that were cut short, something Jackson had never seen before.
“Yeah,” he answered with a slight sigh, still trying to shake off his dwellings of adolescent misery. “I’m Jackson.” He pushed himself up to a sitting position, turning to fully face the woman. “Never seen you before,” he stated obviously, making an awkward attempt at stirring up a conversation.
The boy did not hold a cheerful disposition, and though she did not know the boy, she had a gut feeling that something might have been wrong with the boy. He seemed slightly disheartened by something, what that could have been was beyond what she knew. Most of the pups, and adolescents she had met in the past had been rather excited, and full of energy, or they were something like Venom, introverted, yet when comfortable, rather loud. She cocked her head to him, but she said nothing yet, instead she let him speak on. He did. and he told her that his name was Jackson. He also went on to say that he had not seen her around before. She let out a giggle and she walked up closer to the boy, friendly smile still on face before she had come close enough to touch the male, in which she leaned over and she poked the boy's nose with her finger. Well I've never seen you around before either, Mister Jackson. the woman giggled as her tail wagged behind her and she had then decided to sit down with the boy. She pulled her skirt so it would be flat on the ground when she sat and she had also slung her bag from around her shoulders and she placed it on the ground, it making a thump sound as well as something metal tapping against the glass jar to make it clink.
I'm Furcas in Anathema now, one of the healers. I live towards one of the exits, in one of the bigger caves. the woman spoke, nodding her head lightly as she spoke, giving him information that he might need about her in the future, even though he probably didn't care. What're you doin all the way out here by yerrself, dear sir? the woman asked, wondering what he was doing out here. Perhaps she could help him with whatever that was.
As she poked him in the nose, he blinked in surprise, not expecting the action. He pulled his head back, confused, but her cheery words and giggles actually worked well to make him feel a bit better. A slight smile crept to his maw and he laughed a short laugh. She sat down next to him, and the hybrid youth suddenly found himself glad for the company. Panda seemed nice, and this sure beat sitting around, wallowing all alone. His eyes briefly turned to her bag as she settled it on the ground, wondering what could be in there to make all those noises.
The woman went on to describe her rank and the place she lived inside the howling caverns of Anathema. Papa had gone over the ranking system a few times with him and his sister, but Jackson had hardly paid it much mind. But he supposed now that he was getting older, he would really have to start paying attention to such things. So he tucked the title of “Furcas” and its significance away into his memories. He wished he had a real, adult rank to tell Panda about too, but as he was still within the puppy ranks, he kept quiet. He didn’t want her to think any less of him for it. “I live farther in the caves, with my dad and my sister, Agony,” he said instead, imitating her nodding as he spoke.
When she asked about what he was doing our here alone, he hesitated at first. “Well, it’s just…” Beneath his fur, a slight blush colored his cheeks, and he shifted his gaze away nervously. How could he explain? He felt embarrassed to explain this to the fully grown woman. It made him feel childish, and if there was anything the boy wanted most in the world, it was to be recognized as an adult. He was too stubborn to admit that he still had a bit of growing to do, both physically and mentally. The hybrid boy sighed, blue eyes turned back over to Panda. “It’s just, I still can’t shift. My dad says I’m old enough, but I can’t do it. I thought if I came out here by myself, maybe I could concentrate better or something…” His floppy ears pulled back slightly out of distress and embarrassment.
Out of Character: <333 It's also been some time since we played together. we should play more often-like. +3
The boy would explain to the panda pelted woman that he and his father and sister lived further in the caves of Anathema. It was probably best that the boy did not live closer because of the venting system that Panda had for when she had been making her soaps. The fumes would not reach the back of the cave, so they would not have to breathe it. Panda and Venom had masks to put on when they were cooking lye so they did not have to breath too much of it in. Who's yerr dad? the woman asked, wondering if she had met his father yet or not. Panda hadn't met too many of the family, so she didn't have a wide knowledge of who lived in the caves and who didn't, but hopefully one day she would be able to know most if not all of the members of her family.
When the boy had continued to speak, Panda made sure to listen closely to the boy. Jackson would explain that he was old enough to shift now, but he just couldn't get a hang of it yet. It made her wonder how young he was, because she did realize that he was young, but she was unsure of where he was because there were barely many differences between the 6 month old and an adult besides maybe the size difference. She looked at him closer though, trying to guess how old he was. Panda held a smile on her maw. Well, shifting fer teh first time was pretty hard ferr' me too. I believe I wasa'bout 10 months when I first shifted. it was true, the woman had not been able to shift for some time, and her sister was the first to achieve the goal. When Panda had shifted though, she had found what she needed to and she had ran with it, even becoming more skilled at shifting than her sister. She also was able to train harder and do things in her optime form that Ash had not been able to accomplish either as far as flexibility went.
The woman still smiled to the boy though and she nodded her head lightly. Sometimes ya just need ta relax. the woman had spoken to the young boy. It takes concentration as well as peace and harmony within your mind and body. the woman found that when she was in her happy place, she had been able to shift freely without problems, so maybe that's what this boy needed. Harmony in the mind to shift. Try not to worry about it as much as you are. Ever meditated before? the woman asked Jackson the random question. If he hadn't ever done so, then maybe she could guide him into a meditative state and then help him ease into his Optime form.
The woman asked who his father was, and Jackson wondered briefly if his father had ever met her before. As far as he knew, his father didn't make a habit out of going about and familiarizing himself with many of the newer members to the cave-dwelling pack. The small family had a tendency to stick together, mainly, though the boy supposed his father did enjoy the company of the white-furred leader. Jackson couldn't begin to grasp the slightest idea why that was--the boy wasn't exactly fond of the cool and abrasive Angela. "His name's Ravesque. Ravesque Acidic," he said, blue eyes on the lookout for any sign of recognition on his new acquaintance's features. Perhaps Panda was more of a social butterfly around the pack than the Acidic family and had had the opportunity to introduce herself.
Panda then shared with him some details of her own first time changing forms. "10 months?" he parroted in disbelief. "Wow..." The youth's eyes widened a fraction and his ears pulled farther back. That seemed like such a long time to the boy. If he was already feeling this anxious, he couldn't imagine how he would feel if he had to wait that long. To Jackson, who was only too eager to grow up, waiting another few months would feel like torture. His father had said it might take time, but he thought that he was only saying that. It seemed that there was truth to those words, much to the hybrid boy's dismay.
He remained silent as the woman continued on, eager to hear what else she might have to share with him on the subject. She mentioned calm, peace, and harmony, things that had lately been avoiding the over-eager boy. He had been so anxious about the prospect of taking so long to shift, that he never had considered the benefits of a calm state of mind. It was always focus, focus, focus, trying to force himself into something with little understanding of it. She told him not to worry, but for the boy, that was easier said than done. Then, she asked him if he had ever meditated. "No..." he answered, uncertain. "What is it?" Jackson knew nothing of meditation, but he was willing to hear her out if it was something that could help him get closer to his goal of shifting, if only a little bit.
WC:000+ OOC:and Jpants loves him some jennayy threadssss They are so nomworthy +3
The boy had told her his father's name, but there was no recognizance of the name if only because Panda had kept to herself, but always approached one if they were around. She had seen a few people she simply could not encounter because they seemed to be in a hurry to go along and get wherever they were going, and whatnot, but these few members had been elusive enough for her to not be able to greet them properly. She shrugged her shoulders and shook her head at the boy. I don't know him, but maybes one day I'll be able to meet him. the woman spoke, a smile wide on her face as she looked at the boy. The boy seemed interested and somewhat more anxious about it. Panda didn't mean to scare the boy into becoming more apprehensive about shifting. The woman kept her cool though, and a friendly smile on her face. She was leveled emotionally to keep the atmosphere peaceful. She took a deep, calming breath in, and slowly exhaled. The boy also asked her what meditation is. It was funny because she had taught a little girl some time back how to meditate, to keep emotions under control and what not. This wasn't the first time she was having to explain herself.
Panda cleared her throat for a second, and opened her maw to speak. Meditating is where you just let your mind slow down completely, ease your mind of all the troubles and to level your emotions. Basically, you're training your mind to be silent and only give you the things that you need to know. the woman explained to the boy. It's pretty easy. I can guide you into a meditation if you would like. It's nothing strenuous, I promise. the woman spoke on to the boy, a smile on her maw still and her chocolate eyes on the boy, wondering if he would like to try and meditate with her, to see if this, perhaps was the way he could learn to shift. She and he were two different people, and maybe something else would be better for him, but she was willing to try what she knew for him just in case her way did work with him like it had with her.
She answered that she had not met his father yet, and he nodded, mostly expecting that sort of response from her. Maybe he would even tell his father about his encounter with the woman. The boy was likely to tell him about her anyway, as fond as he was of weaving stories for his father and sister about his days' adventures. Agony might not have really cared to listen to him most of the time, but Ravesque would always take a moment to listen to the words of his son. Jackson couldn't wait to have even more exciting things to tell his father about, but in Jackson's mind, that would only be possible if he could finally achieve his most sought after goal of walking about in his optime form. Maybe this meditating that Panda spoke of would help him out with that. So he listened intently to her explanation, learning that it required a calm and silent mind.
Thinking of only the things I need, he thought. Maybe that was what his problem had been all along. Often he would get himself so worked up about the idea that he would need to shift, that he could hardly keep track of his frantic thoughts. Taking a moment to slow down and get everything into perspective seemed like such a simple idea, but one that the boy realized he had never quite been able to do. Even in his laziest moments, his thoughts were always abuzz with some idea or another, some worry or some exciting prospect. Panda's smiling offer to help him meditate was met with a brief moment of consideration from the boy. What could it hurt? It seemed like she knew what she was talking about, and Jackson was just about ready to try anything, should it help him. He nodded then, cerulean eyes seeking out her own gaze. "Okay," he finally said. "I'd like that."
The male stopped for a moment, a pause in time, in which Panda could only assume that the child was thinking about if he would like her to help him. When he finally answered her, she had been happy with his choice and she put her sketchbook to the side of her and she crossed her legs and put her elbows on her knees and got herself in a comfortable position. His positioning might have had to be different, more like laying down. She looked at him with her chocolate eyes and smiled still at him. "It'd be best if you get in a position you can completely relax, you might be stuck in one spot for some time. " she spoke as she started to get herself ready to relax. She took deep, even breaths of air and she looked to the boy, waiting for him to get comfortable. Once he had, she had continued one with these words: "Close your eyes. Take a few deep breathes, push all the air out of your lungs when you exhale.... Do this however long you need to, to prepare your mind for the slow down. Everything that is on your mind, whatever it is, weither it is your family issues, what you are going to eat for dinner, or the issues of feeling inferior, just let it all go." She gave him a few pauses in her words so that he could follow her instructions while she too meditated. She would be trying to use her own shamanism to guide him through what he was going to do. She'd done this many times before, and this one would be only different because of the different mind and spirit she would be guiding.
Panda sucked in a deep breath of the ocean air. It was peaceful here where they were. She noticed and she liked it. The perfect place to be doing exactly what they were doing. "Inhale...Exhale.. As you relax, your mind will become blank... As we want it, and soon, an image will start to appear in your mind's eye. Gradually, your image becomes clear, it's someone whom you admire, whoever that may be. Whatever qualities you admire in them will show themselves to you and these qualities in their eyes. Weither that be strength, kindness, calmness, determination. Whatever you see there means what you want to accomplish...Now take a step back, look at them as a whole. Look at the way they stand, turn them around what do they look like to you? Think about what words you come up with and how those words relate to the inner qualities we thought about earlier. Do they relate at all?" she asked, but did not expect the male to respond. He should have responded in his mind. All the floppy eared boy should have listened to what was being said to him.
"Look closely again at the other person, and then slowly let their face mold into your own. Look at your own face, and see what qualities you see in yourself? Did you ever notice any of these qualities before? Have they been laying dormant within you to where you ignore them completely? " she spoke, her voice calm and collected, her breathing normal, her ears erect before she continued again. "Slowly draw back and look at yourself, imagine that you and an image of strength and stability are becoming one, honor yourself for whom you strive to be every day, and notice who that is. You are success, Jackson. Don't let yourself forget this " the woman spoke her last words before she would smile and slowly peek her eyes open. She chuckled softly. "Not too painless, eh?"
Yay!
