Just tell me to leave

Saluce Tremblay · 02-11-2012, 06:33 PM

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WC:530<3

The behemoth sat atop a cliff overlooking the Ichikan landscape. He sat rather pleasantly looking inward and instead of outward for threats. The animals that had escaped where a reminder that threats where foreign and domestic at times and he was growing increasingly worried about his mate. Such a sudden thrust into the leader of the pack would undoubtedly mean some weren’t happy about it, but nothing so far had tipped him off to any such social unrest, but it didn’t mean he wouldn’t keep a close eye either. Saluce really didn’t have much evidence to suggest any ill will, just that he knew in cases such as this when a new leaders dominance was still being tested that he would be there if any such act would arise.

X’y had returned from the festival while he had held down the fort at home, and his presence had been gone from the den sight for a couple of days. So he hadn’t seen her yet after her return. He didn’t really have an explanation good enough to give her as to why he hadn’t been around, he’d worked in his shop, kept up a rigorous border patrol, and had begun walking the grounds of Ichika making sure everything was where it should be. None of them where good enough to explain why he hadn’t went to go see her upon her arrival, but rather he had simply misplaced the day it was, having forgot when she would have arrived. The thought of Nayru and now the gone Razakiel had at first upset and even depressed him to some degree but now he was just looking at it as a natural thing. His mind had already made the steps necessary but he still couldn’t fathom groveling at his mate’s feet, because of her now exalted status in the pack.

How could a lowly mid rank wolf ever think he was worthy enough of being the mate to the leader? It scared him honestly, especially noticing the visitor’s scents at the borders. He may not have been there or seen what had transpired but he had known his mate had met someone there. And with that doubt he began to doubt his own claim on her. If she was the leader she needed someone equally ranked as she was and he wasn’t it. Saluce had never fit in well with the packs in Nova Scotia, his own ideals kept him constantly at odds but it had never bothered him so much. Now he felt he was a hindrance instead of a help, and the male sat atop the cliff brooding over it all. Undoubtedly he knew X’y would come looking for him, and the urge to slip off into the shadows and return to the wilderness had already hit his form. The thought was entertained, and his feet had almost made the first step but he remained fixed, knowing his heart wouldn’t let him leave. However he couldn’t make himself begin to move down the cliff either, because fear had worked its way in him, fear that he would be discarded now and be left to wonder if it would have been better if she had never been promoted.

Image courtesy of Frau Böb@Flickr; table by the Mentors!

X'yrin Exultare · 02-11-2012, 07:02 PM

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ooc:

There was a woman that dwelled in Ichika that fancied herself a warrior. She was strong and able and kind at heart, and her mind was ever changes with the experiences of the passing days. She had learned from her life led before this what it meant to care for her familiars, but it was only within these lands had she learned what it meant to love. It was an emotion lost to her brethren, condemned for its complications. Living among these people of these vast lands she could understand why her family would seek to keep these emotions from their culture, but at the same time she damned them for robbing their generations of such wonderful feelings.

But she love was splendid in all its complexities; it was also frightening and strange. She learned how it could twist the mind and incite a fear no vicious fang or blade to compare to. She learned how love could foster doubt in an otherwise certain mind, and how it could shake even the strong to their core. And in all its strangeness and complications, she still cherished its feelings and was glad to experience it daily. The love for her pack even when their faces were absent to her, the love of the growing generation even though they were not her own, and the love of her mate though he seemed to avoid her during these trying times.

When her life was better spent in ignorance, this woman learned that the luxury was no longer hers to delve in. She may not have wholly embraced what it meant to lead but gradually she was coming to understand its implications. The airs meant to be upheld as well as the responsibility. She blamed none for this sudden shift in her life and believed it to be the will of the ancestors that this trial be hers to overcome. And as all things before it, she would with her utmost ability. But she found herself against an obstacle she could not begin to hurdle. She did not know how to scale its stone walls and see to the other side. She was faced with uncertainty and did not know where to begin to dispel it.

She this woman was determined to try even at the risk of failure, even if that failure meant the loss of precious love she held dear. And she had found her first step, as distant as it was and took stride along its path, carrying her further from the cradle of the territory into the shadowing mountains’ embrace. Her meeting earlier that day left her in hopeful spirits, but there was still a sliver of doubt that crossed her eyes occasionally. But each time she felt the creeping down, she would gently rest a claw on the head of the fledging braced against her chest and whispered words of assurance, not for it but for herself to make her believe that all would be well. It had to be.

Taking a deep breath, she paused in stride and placed her palm over the head of the young bird before raising her muzzle and letting her call ring out for her beloved to hear. She had searched for him in all other places but here and could only hope that he would answer her pleading voice.

557 words.

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Saluce Tremblay · 02-11-2012, 07:31 PM

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WC:530*nuzzles*

The simple life he had hoped for, seemed to be out of his reach now. For he never fancied himself as some aspiring loyal pack member, at some point he had had his own ideas of forming his own pack, but that now seemed to have been robbed from him. The uncertainty that hung over him, hung because he felt as if that dream was gone now. If he stayed, if he stayed here with her he would never get to experience that, but he would get to experience other things, they would have children, he’d raise a brood of warriors with her and he’d always be at her side. The complexity of pack hierarchy though ate at him, it had been he who had claimed her, and even though their relationship had evolved into one mutual respect and adoration between the two of them. Paws continued to sit idly, four paws and one mind swirling in uncertainty.

It wasn’t long while he was in thought that her beautiful voice filled the sky, and he knew whom she wanted to see. But he didn’t move, his head turned in the direction of the call and as much as he wanted to answer it he remained silent. Even he considered reacting and running forth as some subservient act, would he have to roll over and show his belly now? He didn’t know, didn’t really know anything, just that he struggled with seeing her in his mind as his mate and as his alpha.

He waited, longer than he usually ever did, before his nose arched to the sky to return her call with his own. The notes though where absent of much, conveying the torture his soul seemed to be going through. He had won her heart once, and she had been his ever since but he feared that his chance at a loving mate was evaporating as quickly as she took control over the pack.

Image courtesy of Frau Böb@Flickr; table by the Mentors!

X'yrin Exultare · 02-11-2012, 07:54 PM

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ooc:

She stood still and waited patiently for his return, perhaps even sight of him.. but not this absence. Her feet remained set on the cold earth, its uncomfortable chill seeping through to the bone. Her ears remained trained forward, searching on a swivel for any hint of his voice before she proceeded. But there was only the gentle wind and silence and with a heavy heart, the Nomad felt alone…unwanted. Perhaps he wasn’t there, she thought hopefully trying to bring back a sliver of light to her darkening world. She could have just missed him as he went to venture to another pack. Yes… something like that was all. He was truly ignoring her as she thought. He was just busy… that’s all.

Feeling the fledgling shift in her arms, she looked down to its short 'ears' and stroked its newly preened feathers fondly. To make herself comfortable, the young bird craned its neck and grabbed a loose strand from the tightly bond autumn cord. The beak was still underdeveloped, a subtle bud of bone nestled in its feathered skull, but it was quite an invasive appendage, that much was certain. X’yrin smiled fondly at the bird as she reached the tail end of her braid and waved it playfully in front of the little one's beak. The beaded feathers woven in her mane shook excitedly at the actions, encouraging a more engaged reaction out of the fledgling before a sudden call stole both their attentions.

Her ears shot up instantly and honed in on its origin. But once they pointed her in the right direction they fell back against her skull, the mournful tone still ringing audibly in her ears. But why would he feel like that? Had something happened that she did not know about? Both curiosity and worried compelled her to move forward. A protective hand gentle pressed the bird against her chest as she scaled the exterior of the cliff in sight, extending her legs to their limits before she was forced to aid her ascent with an arm. Twice the young bird tried to escape before a firm press forced it to settle. And when her large paws touched level ground, the avian settled completely as she female wolf paused a moment to catch her breath. Each inhale was fragrant with the nearing scent of her mate and her tail wagged happily to this acknowledgement. But when she continued forward with hues of grey within her sights, the elated banner slowed to a hesitant sway then all together stopped as she was not met with his eager affections but a cloud of gloom and stone façade.

“Saluce?” she whimpered softly, hoping to goad him out of his reclusive poster to greet her. None the less he did not wait for his receptive and walked carefully toward him with quiet bird in arms. “My Ombre…I am sorry I was gone for several days, I had hoped to see you when I returned.” She eased a bit closer until she was beside them then carefully lowered herself to her knees. “I wanted to give you something the instant I came back… it’s a gift.” She carefully held out the small owl for him to see. “Look.”

538 words.

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Saluce Tremblay · 02-11-2012, 08:15 PM

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WC:350

Saluce could hear her arrival plainly but his body made no move to greet her. The fear and sadness that enveloped him had to great a hold on him in his current circumstance. Blues peered over at her as his head turned to half way address her before his head dipped silently. Her voice brought a chill along his spine, having missed hearing it and missed her to deeply in the past few days but it didn’t show across his face.

Blues beheld the gift in her arms but no rousing of his tail seemed to show any excitement at the prospect of the bird and what it meant. Wasn’t because he hated the gift, but he wasn’t accustomed to having gifts given to him. Blues studied the bird and then turned back toward her eyes questioningly, his mind unable to really process much other than the conflict he held at the moment.

“What’s this for?” he asked softly, with a hint of bewilderment, unsure of how to eve act when such a thing was offered to him. His body recoiled almost in hate but it all boiled down to him standing and walking a few feet away obviously unsure of the situation.

“You’re the alpha and your still bothering to gift a lowly wolf such as me?” he recited. He couldn’t process it, nor could he find the sincerity in her gift. The emotions running through him manifested in his stiff stance and a look about him that he was ready to bolt any second. Maybe it was all manufactured in his mind but he just couldn’t sit and accept the circumstances as they were right now. He felt alone for the first time in a while. Even his promise to never leave her came into question, and there was a real detachment from the events in front of him. His blues looked at her once again, a flash of love seemed to come through even though he acted as if she was a stranger. The behemoth wanted her still, but too much was getting in the way for him to react as he should have to such a wonderful gift.

Image courtesy of Frau Böb@Flickr; table by the Mentors!

X'yrin Exultare · 02-11-2012, 08:31 PM

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ooc:

His misunderstanding for the gift was expected, but she anticipated a question rather than his whole withdrawal. When he asked for its reason her brows receded into her lengthened bangs and her maw parted slightly in bewilderment. What was it for? Did she need a reason to give him anything? And what was more was his attitude. This was not like the Saluce she knew. Where was his affections, where was his smile from seeing her? Just what had happened to her mate?

And what was more was his recoil from him. His sudden stand and walk from her bristled the fine hairs at the nape of her neck and her brows furrowed irritably at his behavior. She did not like this side of him. She knew him to be a vocal male, professing what ailed him rather than play cold and distant. And his words did nothing to else her growing disease toward him. X’yrin brought the tiny owl back into her chest before rolling from her knees to stand upright again. She voiced and audible growl of concern before she made herself speak and be understood.

“A lowly wolf? Saluce what do you mean by that?” She couldn’t feign ignorance to his observation, but she certainly did not know him to be lowly. “Where I stand in the pack should have nothing to do with my giving you a gift, my ombre. I am your mate…your wife, before I am your Alpha.” The distance he forced between them was unsettling and she sought to close it before any uncertainties could fill that void. She walked over to his side again and gently brushed her shoulder into his arm hoping to coax him out of his mood and be endearing to her as he always was. “Saluce you should know this,” her lips turned to a small, hopeful smile. “How I feel for you will not change, nor how I treat you. Why would you suggest otherwise?”

328 words.

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Saluce Tremblay · 02-11-2012, 08:46 PM

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WC:370

He watched her, his form still unable to bring itself to be happy or rejoice in her presence. Even as withdrawn as he was he couldn’t help but feel he was being childish, even if he feared she would move on to someone else now. The grey exterior seemed to shift uncomfortably even as a paw started to raise to run a claw along the length of her maw but it was stifled as if some ailment kept him from doing so. He wanted her to be his for eternity he really did, but now he felt that was about to be taken from him.

“Because you deserve better than me,” he blurted out, the sadness in his throat catching the words. As proud as he was he couldn’t force her to be with him, nor could he condone such a thing with her current stature. Blues took in her beauty, noting that nothing had changed since their first meeting, he was still just as madly in love with her as he had ever been and yet even though her act of reciting what he should have known to be true was received in an off fashion.

His hand rose slowly, the sinew in it shaking visibly as it traced a claw around her cheek, maybe more because of the mood he was in or some yet to be discovered ailment, but the shakes where simply uncontrollable for him to control. It was really too much, he loved her too much to act in such a fashion but the wall had been built by him, and she felt a million miles away. Saluce couldn’t play her actions off as ignorance, because he gave her more credit than that, that her words had to be true or else she wouldn’t have spoken them.

“I just don’t want to lose you; I noticed the scents at the border, one from Casa Di Cavalieri, and one from Anathema, both male. I had hoped they were just acquaintances when I noticed the one from the southern pack was the one you danced with at the festival.” He let it trail off his form still distance all be it for his one hand, slowly running along her cheek.

Image courtesy of Frau Böb@Flickr; table by the Mentors!

X'yrin Exultare · 02-11-2012, 09:15 PM

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ooc:

Where was the male she had fallen in love with? For this hesitant sham of his image was a terrible shade. She hadn’t know him to have a second thought when it came to her. His touch was never this hesitant, so fleeting that one may not have thought it had happened at all. This mountain of fading nerve and uncertainty, this was not her mate. This was not her husband. But whatever he was, she was angered by his image and her heart was breaking to be forced to look at it.

She wanted to snap at him for his sadden words and at least hold his muzzle to keep further obscenities from poisoning her ears. She deserved better… Who was better than the man before her? Who else did she need but him? And while she entertained these obscene thoughts, she wondered what it was that compelled him to ask them, let alone ask this way. What provoked his doubt? Her muzzle flicked away from his touch, not at all feeling generous enough to entertain his pitiful mood. It wasn’t like him to be this way and he certainly wouldn’t have expected her to act like this either. Her knew her better than this now, that whatever guise he attempted to place upon himself would be torn off until he bared the truth of what bothered him. Distracting himself however tantalizing the touch would not free him from this.

But the words that followed removed the marring frown from her brows and again they receded into her autumn bangs. Two males…Jazper and Alaki. He was put in this mood because of them? But when he brought up the festival, the dance she shared with the Cavalieri Sole, she understood the meaning of him bringing it up and could not fathom as a guess as to why he was acting like this. “You are worried you are not worth me because they are Leads of their own packs,” she recited soft, though blandly. “You think they hold a higher interest to be than you, my ‘mate’ because I am ranked the same as they… Saluce,” she woman breathed deeply his scent in an attempt to calm her raising temper, having never suffered such an insult in her life.

“Do you think so little of me that I would leave you because my rank has changed and off with another male? I have given myself, my love, my heart to you, and you would for a moment think that I would forsake all that for another of my rank? Is that really what you think of me?” In an attempt to calm herself, she paused then took a step back from him holding short-eared owl possessively to her chest. “That male you saw me dancing with, the Cavalieri at our borders. His name is Jazper and he is a friend of mine, one of the few that I have made in these lands. And the Anatheman male was Alaki and his companion. I asked him to meet me when we were at the festival so I could learn of our neighbors and perhaps build a positive relationship. I am insulted that you would think something else would be implied by these actions. Or that you would go to this length to avoid speaking to me about it. Was it not you that said we would need to talk to each other if we are to be together? And yet you would go against your words because of unnecessary doubt and hideaway instead of talking to me. Truly, Saluce…what do you take me for?”

603 words.

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Saluce Tremblay · 02-11-2012, 09:49 PM

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WC:420

And just like that, it all seemed to shatter into a million pieces. Her verbal reprimand, the venom that she tried so desperately to keep from her voice but it still seeped through. His eyes widened, and his hands shook, the shaking had been a rather recent development that he had noticed. He had always had a bit of a twitch after the snow storm accident but from time to time it would get worse, and he always did his best to hide it from everyone. But here with his mind racing and the words he wanted to speak where choked in his throat.

She was rightfully upset, he has in a roundabout way accused her of an unthinkable act, but the differences in the situation where he wasn’t standing here demanding she admit to something he wasn’t sure she did. But her retreat from his was the most damning of it all, for a moment he sat in silence, like the wind had been taken from him. His empty gaze looking to her but unable to find himself coming up with the words to make it all better. How could he? What could he possibly say that would wipe all this away.

“I just…” the words caught once again, not really able to form anything cohesive enough to mouth. “I just needed to hear you say it. You were in my position once, I can’t help but feel jealous, and feel afraid that I’m going to lose you” he recited. He was withdrawing into himself, true he had never acted in such a fashion with her before. Saluce had always been confident, brash, and always sure of himself, but he wasn’t sure of anything, except the wound it would cause him if he lost her. The man wasn’t acting like the man he had been before all of this, he felt small, insignificant and unable to see past his own short comings.

Blues rose up to gaze at her, he felt as if there was nothing in the world that mattered to him except her. A long sigh escaped his lips, the shaking seemed to stop as quickly as it came about, and his face slowly regained some composure.

“I’m sorry to have doubted you.” His voice carried with a soft hint of sadness, figuring this was how it would end. Every relationship he had ever been in had ended and most of them had been because of his own stupidity so he assumed that today would be the end of it.

Image courtesy of Frau Böb@Flickr; table by the Mentors!

X'yrin Exultare · 02-11-2012, 10:15 PM

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ooc:

She let him sit in his self-induced silence and let the weight of her words truly seep in. It was true that she had been in his position before, and just as he was cold to her, she had been with him. But she had expected him to not hold anything from her like this, just as he asked the same of her. The fact that he went against that left an abrasive wound that made it difficult for her to breathe. Her chest, her heart, it hurt with every inhale of his scent and she was doing her best not to lash out in punishment because of the pain of mistrust he inflicted.

But even as he apologized, she was not readily accepting of it. Though it worked to ease her mind a little, she was still smarting internally, upset by his accusations. She refused to meet his eyes and kept her gaze burning into the innocent show. Against her breast the fledgling shuffled for attention, fighting to free her wings from the possessive bind and feel the air she only just learned to skirt. But a careful hand atop her head kept her still, that and the soft comforting growl of her handler as she began to move toward the stormy male.

“Here,” the fledge owl looked up as it was suddenly thrust into the broad chest of the unfamiliar male. Immediately its wings bat the air in an attempt to escape til a purposeful claw was placed against its beak and it ceased its fussing. The golden female brought the same claw to her muzzle then again to the young bird’s beak growling softly in comfort to affirm it was safe. “Be more concerned about losing your gift,” the woman replied heatedly to her mate. “I would have thought by now you would know I am not going to leave you. But if you are not careful, this bird will.” Forcefully she grabbed Saluce’s hand and let it rest just beneath the steely claws of the vulture. X’yrin would still not meet his eyes as she positioned him to cradle his gift then suddenly withdrew and turned on her heel.

“Her name is Candria,” she replied in clipped tone as if the conversation be uncertainty before hadn’t happened at all. “You should get to know her before you return home. I’ll be waiting for you there.” Still she would not look at him even as she brushed passed him with a forceful nudge to his shoulder to the edge of the cliff to begin her descent down, leaving her mate to care for his new gift.

439 words.

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Saluce Tremblay · 02-11-2012, 11:34 PM

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WC:480

It didn’t seem to matter what he said, she was still pissed at him. Her actions seemed to suggest just how irritated she was, as she shoved the bird he didn’t want into his arms. Why on earth she would have thought he would have cherished a bird as a gift he had no idea. He’d have better luck eating it then he ever would bonding or training it. Her hands forcefully made his cradle it even though he really just wanted to drop the thing and go on and leave already. Seemed she didn’t know him as well as he thought. Gifts weren’t something he liked to receive at all, he’d much rather give than get anything.

He ignored her comments for now, letting her go on about her brooding as he looked at the curious thing in his arms. Saluce sighed heavily, already feeling like he was trapped, and not caring a bit to open his arms and let the thing fly off and be free of him. And he did just that, his arms opened, the bird was left to flap it’s wings and with a bit of effort it flew into the sky. It was better this way he gathered, the male never liked birds anyway, especially the one his mate carried around with her. Saluce would have never gotten a horse if the circumstances hadn’t come together, and even now he really couldn’t say he was all that attached to the horse. The behemoth used him for jobs he couldn’t do alone and yet he did enjoy his presence from time to time.

Blues looked up into the sky as the bird fought the vicious currents above him, struggling to stay aloft and failing terribly. A quick ting of fear struck him as it struggled and then rocketed downwards as if it had been hit by a rock. The man leapt quickly scrambling to the edge of the cliff as a long arm flew outwards and a powerful hand grasped the falling bird. It took him a second to realize he had actually caught her, but it wasn’t long before her pecking and screeching told him it was true. The big wolf stood pulling the bird back to him and letting it settling into his chest, this time its wings stayed closed, its frightful experience keeping it pleasantly happy to be in the security of his chest.

“Rough day for you isn’t it?” he said really not caring if the bird understood or not. A paw scratched it’s claw against its beak and it responding but mirroring his actions. He really had no idea what to do with this thing, or how to even go near X’y but for now he chose to walk down the cliff, and when it came time to turn toward the den site, he turned the opposite direction. He didn’t intend on talking with her again today.

Image courtesy of Frau Böb@Flickr; table by the Mentors!

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